Destroy My Dream

BubblyBookworm · Sep 16, 2015

Everyday_Man said:
Done, but it's for lepers & you are designated to apply the sun block.

I wish I was the world's greatest knot tyer.

Done, but she'd tie you to the bed.

I wish I had a massage right now.

Everyday_Man · Sep 16, 2015

BubblyBookworm said:
Done, but she'd tie you to the bed.

I wish I had a massage right now.

Done, but you found the masseuse off Craigslist and the guy has rough hands, can't stop sweating and drooling and both those fluids are dripping all over you.

I wish I knew everyone's darkest secret upon shaking their hand.

smtst5 · Sep 16, 2015

BubblyBookworm said:
Done, but she'd tie you to the bed.

I wish I had a massage right now.

Your masseuse will be right over but he has stomach issues today and cannot stop farting.

I dream of becoming a king

Monkey_Face · Sep 16, 2015

smtst5 said:
Your masseuse will be right over but he has stomach issues today and cannot stop farting.

I dream of becoming a king

Your brutal rise to power leaves immeasurable death and destruction in your wake. You sit alone upon your throne of tears, no longer able to recognize what you have become. You assume those around you are as bloodthirsty and power hungry as you are, your paranoia stripping your last vestiges of humanity as your fears become self-fulfilling prophecies and your empty castle crashes around you.

Wish I had a cookie.

Mindfondler · Sep 16, 2015

Monkey_Face said:
Wish I had a cookie.

Granted, but it's a tracking cookie from a website that then uses it to bombard you with unwanted advertisements.

I wish that I were able to leap tall buildings in a single bound.

Monkey_Face · Sep 17, 2015

Mindfondler said:
Granted, but it's a tracking cookie from a website that then uses it to bombard you with unwanted advertisements.

I wish that I were able to leap tall buildings in a single bound.

Granted, but gravity is a cruel mistress who makes no exception for you on the way back down.

Wish I had a pet racoon.

John_Q_Public · Oct 4, 2015

Monkey_Face said:
Granted, but gravity is a cruel mistress who makes no exception for you on the way back down.

Wish I had a pet racoon.

Your wish is granted, only your racoon has a ferocious temper and has a wicked case of rabies. Oh wait, as it turns out, this is already true about racoons.

I wish none of my wish none of my wishes ever came true.

BubblyBookworm · Oct 4, 2015

John_Q_Public said:
Your wish is granted, only your racoon has a ferocious temper and has a wicked case of rabies. Oh wait, as it turns out, this is already true about racoons.

I wish none of my wish none of my wishes ever came true.

If your wishes don't come true, I'll grant them.

anthilly · Oct 4, 2015

Well there no which to ruin soo....

I wish I had a chuck Norris beard.

studnextdoor · Oct 4, 2015

Done, to bad it constantly beat's the crap out of you.
I wish I could stop time.

BubblyBookworm · Oct 4, 2015

studnextdoor said:
Done, to bad it constantly beat's the crap out of you.
I wish I could stop time.

Done, but in stopping time, you experience the same day, over and over.

I wish I had could have some chocolate frosting.

cliteatingman · Oct 4, 2015

BubblyBookworm said:
Done, but in stopping time, you experience the same day, over and over.

I wish I had could have some chocolate frosting.

Done but you have to lick it off my cock.

I wish I had a pussy to lick.

studnextdoor · Oct 4, 2015

cliteatingman said:
Done but you have to lick it off my cock.

I wish I had a pussy to lick.

Done, heres a cat for you.

I wish I could breath under water.

BubblyBookworm · Oct 4, 2015

cliteatingman said:
Done but you have to lick it off my cock.

I wish I had a pussy to lick.

Done, but puts a kitten on your tongue.

I wish I could have a pot of gold.

Stillstiff · Oct 4, 2015

BubblyBookworm said:
Done, but puts a kitten on your tongue.

I wish I could have a pot of gold.

Done, but every time you touch the gold it turns into chocolate candy wrapped in gold foil.

I wish that I would have company in my bed tonight.

TheJestersAdvocate · Oct 4, 2015

Stillstiff said:
Done, but every time you touch the gold it turns into chocolate candy wrapped in gold foil.

I wish that I would have company in my bed tonight.

Granted, but it turns out it's the electric, telephone and gas companies. And you're not only late but way over due on all bills.

I wish that I have a great Halloween.

pfflyerhot · Oct 4, 2015

TheJestersAdvocate said:
Granted, but it turns out it's the electric, telephone and gas companies. And you're not only late but way over due on all bills.

I wish that I have a great Halloween.

Done, but nobody will understand what your costume is supposed to be.

I wish I had a brand new car—no. Truck. I wish I had a brand new truck.

TheJestersAdvocate · Oct 4, 2015

pfflyerhot said:
Done, but nobody will understand what your costume is supposed to be.

I wish I had a brand new car—no. Truck. I wish I had a brand new truck.

Now I'm not sure if that's a good thing...guess it all depends on the costume I had intended.

Granted.....but it not only has those "hanging ball" things (which are ridiculously oversized as well as incapable of being removed, those dragging on the ground and ruining mileage) but your truck....no matter where you park it, always ends up parked like a douche in two handicapped spaces.

I wish I could have a massage.

MagicaPractica · Oct 4, 2015

TheJestersAdvocate said:
Now I'm not sure if that's a good thing...guess it all depends on the costume I had intended.

Granted.....but it not only has those "hanging ball" things (which are ridiculously oversized as well as incapable of being removed, those dragging on the ground and ruining mileage) but your truck....no matter where you park it, always ends up parked like a douche in two handicapped space

I wish I could have a massage.

Done, but it's one of those where they walk on your back.

I wish I could write a bestselling novel.

TheJestersAdvocate · Oct 4, 2015

MagicaPractica said:
Done, but it's one of those where they walk on your back.

I wish I could write a bestselling novel.

I've actually never tried that and would only be opposed to it if the person was wearing cleats.

Granted - but unfortunately it is just like Twilight, making a feature of a genre a joke for some time to come.

I wish for a hammock.

yellowrocket · Oct 4, 2015

Done, hands you a male g string

I wish I knew if I could still pick up women

albertaboy · Oct 4, 2015

yellowrocket said:
Done, hands you a male g string

I wish I knew if I could still pick up women

Done, but they all weigh 400 lbs and you permanently damage your back.

I wish I lived out west.

yellowrocket · Oct 4, 2015

Done, but west does not end so you wander west for all eternity.

I wish I could play hockey again

albertaboy · Oct 4, 2015

yellowrocket said:
Done, but west does not end so you wander west for all eternity.

I wish I could play hockey again

But you never are allowed to get off your knees.

I wish it was warmer outside

numeniusa · Oct 4, 2015

albertaboy said:
But you never are allowed to get off your knees.

I wish it was warmer outside

Done, but henceforth there are no refrigerators...

I wish I could draw well

Destroy My Dream

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