How many people have you had sex with?

CoffeeWithMonkeys said:

It made me feel bad too, but for the opposite reason. I'm 51 and have been sexual with one person, my now ex husband. Yep only been with one person ever.
Yeah I've kissed other people, and been propositioned several times, but to me sex is special and not just anyone deserves the privilege to get to have sex with me, so yeah...

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I'm that chewed gum that the church warned you about

only about 5...Ive been real busy with work or something...haha

Tinkerbell29 said:

I’m 40 and slept with 13 guys (not all at once though)

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But would you like to try that now? Maybe not 13 as that is an unlucky number, but maybe 14?

9 non-prostitutes

9 I believe.

I stopped counting when I got to 100. That was 30 years ago.

only 2

Just one for me. I'm 50 years old and feeling like I need to experience at least one other

Is never enough an option?

Bad with numbers

More than my shoe size but less than my IQ.

Lost count

This entire thread makes me nauseous, and so thankful that I found the one for me.

All of them

Age over 50
Only one person has had sex with me.

We are so boring haha, under 10 for both of us combined.

LoveLiving said:

Age over 50
Only one person has had sex with me.

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But in my mind, I have had sex with a lot of the ladies here on Lit.

Well

I think around 15-17 would be my number.

Just 1...

I'm an 18 year old white guy who's a bit thicc... So far just one, but it may soon increase if things go well. Wish me luck!

All of them. Except the others.

8

Not sure if that makes me picky or pathetic
maybe a bit if both

Peach102 said:

8

Not sure if that makes me picky or pathetic
maybe a bit if both

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If I say hundreds, will anyone believe it? Actually, a couple dozen.

10 total, since I’ve been happily married that number has not increased lol

This thread is a trip down memory lane. I wish I had included more details and had rigorously updated. When I wrote this:

Que said:

doing a stretch sounds like a prison term.

apt, that.

hmm i'll start telling people that..."I am currently doing a stretch of celibacy."

Mine is not nearly so noble in motivation. I just live in a town with a five to one male to female ratio, and if truth be known I am hopelessly inept at closing the deal.

I was inept before voluntarily doing a two decade stretch of monogamy. The celibacy stretch came about involuntarily when my cell mate traded her monogamy for infidelity.

so I started with one. planned on ending it at one, and well for now, YAY my number is one.

I am now accepting applicants for numbers 2 through infinity....get your number now, avoid the wait.

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. . .I could not picture I would reach- "I'm not entirely sure."

I can think of who the eighth was because of a comment here. I remember who should have been the 9th which is a pretty interesting story we were going to be each other's ninth although she had scores of women but only eight guys and we had discussed being each-orher's ninth.

By then, I had gotten good at closing.."Always Be Closing" - Alec Balwin in Glengarry Glen Ross. She pointing out a waitress that she had been unsuccessful in getting with and I talked to the waitress into coming home with us except for somehow or another she ended up ditching me for the waitress.

Don't remember exactly who was after that but I can think of at least two from that point which puts me at a minimum of 11 but probably more like 12 or 13.

Add one a month ago where being a shoulder to cry on ended up getting me laid even though I was specifically not trying to seduce her despite the obvious attraction because she seemed so raw and vulnerable. I'm glad she more or less insisted, it was lovely.

I remember the one "just" before that. By "just before" I mean years. It was only the second (of now four) same-day pick-ups. It was, in my mind, just flirting and suddenly we were headed in separate cars to a hotel. That seems like such a small thing but that lack of anticipation and the intimate space of a car ride was missing and for some reason that seemed to set things on the wrong foot. It never got onto the right foot, and though she was sexually fulfilled, I just don't think either of us was emotionally. She was also a one-and-done girl and overly sensitive after orgasm which happens sometimes, but coupled with her not being much of a cuddler I was left deeply unsatisfied and questioning my motivation. It just felt validation seeking and it just didn't feel like me. So I took a break. At that point it was voluntary celibacy with a few glimmers of well maybe I should hit this or that.

Kind of like when I started this whole little journey in between contemplating how my second one would come about to figuring out how to make that happen it seems like some Logistics concerns cropped up. It became easier and not to then to pursue things. There were definitely opportunities that I passed on possibly wisely and others that I passed on because of various trepidations. The longer I went the more I overanalyzed whether I would or wouldn't. I generally though found that I enjoyed the flirt as much as anything else and found a lot of emotional satisfaction in knowing that I could if I wanted to. I kind of feel like I let go of that piece where I excessively crave validation.

The girl that broke my dry-spell shares a lot in common with the girl that was my second.

The latest was on my birthday and it was kind of on purpose. I went out specifically looking and invested entirely too much on what turned out to be a misread opportunity the night before. The next day a little frustrated with myself not so much for not closing the deal but for not realizing how it had soured and getting lost in what I thought was happening instead of what was actually happening I refocus the next day not necessarily with the idea that I needed to succeed so to speak in order to have a great birthday I just went out there flirting. No specific intention just a get back on the horse sort of idea. Oddly I went to get some lunch ran into somebody flirted and my cheesiest pick-up line ever worked. It wasn't even designed to be one but like a lot of things I think it has to be sincerely true for it to have worked. I mentioned that I was treating myself to a nice, rare steak as my birthday lunch. She rolled out the perfect setup line: "What are you doing for your birthday?" With a grin at the opening, I replied, "You, of course."

I was completely unprepared on the wrong side of town and a city that's now larger than Los Angeles. I'm not sure now if she was just uncomfortable bringing a stranger home and actually does live alone or whether her mentioning that we could but we would have to be quick because her roommates were going to be home soon. The way she explained it she lives with a couple and the somehow she's related to one of them I think. That's only important in the sense that later when we talked about getting together again she was very much open to inviting me over to her place and there was no mention of awkwardness with the roommates not could very well be though that she had described our little dalliance to the roommates I'm not really too sure about all of that.

So after explaining to her my situation and make it clear that I'm not some cheating husband trying to avoid the wife catching me, I hopped online to grab a hotel room. I probably ought to learn how to do Airbnb. I'm not sure how I'll probably the marvels of the internet that somehow knows I love vintage hotels I found the San Carlos which is the only Vintage Hotel that you can actually stay at in downtown Phoenix.

Yeah, I know this is not exactly a dear diary thread but what the hell if you've read this far you might as well keep reading.

So the front desk clerk was really nice about the fact that the place I had booked the room had somehow screwed it up and made it for 10 days hence. I didn't really think that the girl would wait 10 days so I needed that adjusted and she gave me a room at just a tiny bit more than my online reservation which was more than fair and I wasn't concerned about the extra expense but I was concerned about the fact that the girl was getting a bit antsy while she figured out where to park cuz I hadn't really thought about the challenges of parking downtown. Valet parking a couple of cars solve that problem but I had to rush in and out of the place a couple of times to get all of that sorted. Again mentioning my birthday the clerk upgraded the hell out of my reservation to a really nice room which I think for purpose of what we were up to was perfect which is probably why she picked it it had an entire mirrored wall which was really fun. Myself, if I have been doing the picking I would have picked an unrestored room. Most of these rooms are unrestored and individually decorated. The girl loves the mirrors and I love watching her watch yourself.

We had a lot of fun I was not very well rested so I'm surprised I did as well as I did given that by then I had been up for about 20 hours. I usually sleep days. She knew to go home and check on the dog and I ended up walking to a CVS and buying a bottle of wine. I'm not much of a drinker but she had mentioned that although somehow we hadn't seem to need one but I thought maybe I should have that handy for round two. Which ended up not happening we were going to have dinner and she ended up on an extended nap at home. I kind of thought that perhaps she had just decided that she'd had enough fun for the day and possibly with me and general but the call the next day was a little was reassuring.

I did really well about the whole thing genuinely enjoying my time luxuriating in this room and all the places I could reach in walking distance from there. I had a great dinner at an Irish bar and a shot of Jameson Black barrel and wandered the streets a little bit drunk and well satiated.

I'm kind of doing some self-monitoring though because the date that was supposed to be Monday and then push to Tuesday was expanded to include a roommate. (Completely unrelated to any of the foregoing paramours) I'm keeping an eye on whether I'm chasing validation or just on a hot streak. The Monday date, which was supposed to be a very nice restaurant with her and the roommate suddenly became her into friends on Thursday instead. Suddenly I'm looking like Uncle sugar. Figuring it would still make a pretty good story I acquiesced. When she arrived pleasantly exactly on time when it sounded like she was running late she had only one friend with her. Not the roommate and a friend that I hadn't met before. Not really sure but it seemed like initially she was genuinely interested in having this friend of hers meet me.

Now I have as good an imagination is anyone but I really did not see either her and the roommate are her in the friend being this magical three-way dropping out of Heaven into my lap so I assumed that she had simply brought her own cock block along. The entire situation was bemsing for all concerned and we had a pretty good time doing kind of a odd bar crawl. She's young and fun and I don't think is done much classical dating like us old people used to do and I think she just like that grown-up vibe since most of the guys she knows wouldn't have any idea which fork to use.

TL;DR Dunno; did not expect to dunno. Certainly 12, maybe 15

Probably 0

Maybe 2 if you have broad enough a definition

coffeelover5 said:

I had tried to remember them by name and did not accomplish it, best guess is over 30 women

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A little late to the conversation. Firstly, I am 80 years of age. I consider "sex" to include genital, oral and anal sex.

Thirty or so years ago, I was sitting in a bar being bored. I grabbed a cocktail napkin and started listing the names of the people with whom I had had sex. I filled one side of the napkin and about half of the other -- 45 or so names in all at the time -- about two-thirds women and one-third men. At the time, I was able to remember all but two of their names. (For some reason, I've always thought it impolite not to know at least the first names of people who were kind enough to have sex with me.)

I've had a few lovers since then and I remember most of their names as well, but I've stopped keeping count. So, to answer the OP's question, about 60-70.

It really depends on how you define “sex.”

It could be several different numbers or simply “I lost count,” depending on how you define “sex.”

Before I realized demisexuality was a normal thing, I thought there was something wrong with me for not being attracted to most people, so I went through a period around age 19 wherein I literally had cybersex/online rp/sexual video chats with anyone who asked, because I was trying to teach myself to be more open to other people as sexual beings. I’m just grateful I was practically agoraphobic during that same period, because all kinds of bad things could have happened if I’d been attempting the same thing in person. I never felt that any of those were sexual, exactly, though they were definitely sexual for the other people involved.

I’ve had 5 in-person, consensual sexual partners, another 2 that were non-consensual on my part, and 5 long-term, long-distance sexual relationships that never or haven’t yet crossed over into in-person encounters.

By my definition (any sexual activity where two or more people are enthusiastically consenting and actually interested in the activity), the number would be 10. (Wow, I definitely thought it would be lower than that. Huh.)

But by the traditional definition that limits it to in-person (and consensual) encounters, 5.