Feel so lost

Joined
Dec 31, 2015
Posts
2
I'm new well I feel I am dipped in and out of this lifestyle over the last 5 or 6 years but really no real taste of what is going on I know that I have a deep desire to please but not sure where to go or what to do please any advice is welcome thank you
 
It's probably a question of not finding the right partner, one whose leanings complement yours.

So I'd suggest get out there, get to know people, don't settle with one night stands. Get to know your partner before you jump to sex and really talk about what each of you expect and where your limits are to see if you might be a good fit.

But of course first you need to figure out for yourself what you're looking for and what you are interested in.
 
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I'm new well I feel I am dipped in and out of this lifestyle over the last 5 or 6 years but really no real taste of what is going on I know that I have a deep desire to please but not sure where to go or what to do please any advice is welcome thank you



Lots of people have the desire to please. How does that play out for you? You'll need to answer that for yourself. What does your ideal relationship look like? Find the words to describe that and you've got a start.
 
Good Advice.... SpunThings

Make a list of things you desire. Also learn about the history of BDSM. The net has produced thousands of drugstore Doms.
Attend a munch or two if you have them near you. BDSM is a lifestyle, you get from it what you put into it.
There is a lot of info in my profile that is good reading. If you have questions PM me.
 
http://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?t=266656

^that's the link to the BDSM Library stickie. In there you'll find a lot of useful topics separated into categories that are fairly easy to navigate. Take some time and read topics that interest you. A little self exploration is a great place to start. (^.^)

Also, avoid anyone that offers to give you more info via PM. If they can't post it in the public forum it's most likely self serving bullshit. ;)

Instead, I would suggest reading the forum and participating in discussions (or starting your own threads with questions). In that way you'll be able to get different viewpoints that can help you to better understand what it is you want.

Once you have an idea of what you'd like for yourself and for your potential relationships, just date. :)
 
I will point out that BDSM is not a lifestyle for everyone. Knitting and crafts are important to me so much so that I can't imagine happiness without them or something else to make, but they are not my lifestyle. I have always sought out things to create, but it is not my lifestyle. Our particular interests in BDSM are important for my husband and I in how we are intimate, but it's not our lifestyle. For some it is a lifestyle, for others it is not. My lifestyle is low-middle incone mom of 3 in rural America.

You may encounter people who think the way they happen to do this whole BDSM thing is the only way it's done. Just ignore them and fit it into your life in a way that suits you. Not everyone who uses the term "lifestyle " is necessarily doing that, but I feel the need to offer my perspective.
 
I will point out that BDSM is not a lifestyle for everyone. Knitting and crafts are important to me so much so that I can't imagine happiness without them or something else to make, but they are not my lifestyle. I have always sought out things to create, but it is not my lifestyle. Our particular interests in BDSM are important for my husband and I in how we are intimate, but it's not our lifestyle. For some it is a lifestyle, for others it is not. My lifestyle is low-middle incone mom of 3 in rural America.

You may encounter people who think the way they happen to do this whole BDSM thing is the only way it's done. Just ignore them and fit it into your life in a way that suits you. Not everyone who uses the term "lifestyle " is necessarily doing that, but I feel the need to offer my perspective.

Ding ding ding...

The award for best advice goes to...

Couldn't have said it better myself.
 
Its something you should really do with a partner, not with one night stands.
 
Lots of people have the desire to please. How does that play out for you? You'll need to answer that for yourself. What does your ideal relationship look like? Find the words to describe that and you've got a start.
Nice screen name
 
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