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A proposal for the GLBT forums

Stella_Omega

Stella_Omega

No Gentleman
Joined
Jul 14, 2005
Posts
39,700
So, I just jumped down Wolfman's throat for his misguided version of "defense" of GLBT.

But I do agree with our "defender" that this forum is not really useful in this form. And if he's saying that the GLBT forum is a misogynistic pigsty then yeah-- it does start feeling that way with some regularity. these incessant threads about how much better women would be if they had dicks, or how much better men would be if they were women with dicks-- after awhile even the strongest stomach will revolt.

And "the Isle of Lesbos" is a single thread, and not every subject belongs in it.

I propose that the GLBT forum be renamed the Fetishists' forum. And that this section be named the GLBT forum. Let it actually be FOR the gay men, the lesbians, the transsexuals and transgendered, who need to talk about identity and sexuality, without the inane litany of "hate-men-want-cock" threads. A few threads from the current GLBT can be moved up here.

(ETA: I see one thread that has been moved here, despite the fact that it was doing pretty well "down below."
http://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?t=743996

We are a minority in the forum that has OUR name on it. Let us have an actual ghetto, instead of nothing much.
 
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Stella_ O , you must understand one thing. I am not one of the fetishists, I care deeply (both in friendship and love) for quite a few members . One of them is a lesbian, the other is a transgendered . And the rest.. well let us just say I have not seen them around in quite a while, and the hostility from some of the GG lesbians towards, the bisexual men, and women . Perhaps not outspoken, but then very poetically is something I have read over the last two years, beginning as a bubbling and sizzling thing which started around late 2006.

But I must confess this, I do have a so-called fetish towards some Cs with a D. But I must be perfectly honest, I respect the woman, that they are. And I would NEVER ever use the dreaded word shemale.

So I agree, let the lesbians, and gay men who hates the GLBT get to a gay forum part of this place. And let the rest of us, who neither hates, gays, lesbians or transgendered people have this forum. Cause I totally agree, it is time to split. Since the GLBT chatter has become in the long run, the GL vs. BT chatter.
 
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Let's keep this thread to the subject of reforming the forums, okay?

I got the gist-- I think-- that you agree that we would be better served by the change I'm suggesting.
 
Stella_Omega: Yes I agree. But the last time I checked, and let us please get a clear answer from Etoile. About what the news and issues really is of kind of forum. Cause for once, I would like to hear her opinion upon the matter.
But I will not retract my former statement about the GLBT chatter, has become the GL vs. BT chatter. Since I am not a politician. Anyway , yeah go get your own little lovely duck pond, I think it would be smashing.
 
Wolfman1982 said:
Stella_Omega: Yes I agree. But the last time I checked, and let us please get a clear answer from Etoile. About what the news and issues really is of kind of forum. Cause for once, I would like to hear her opinion upon the matter.
But I will not retract my former statement about the GLBT chatter, has become the GL vs. BT chatter. Since I am not a politician. Anyway , yeah go get your own little lovely duck pond, I think it would be smashing.
Click to expand...
Versus the cuck and CD chatter, anyway. And of course, the guys who hate men and also hate pussy. Lots of those. homo-gyno-phobes.

yep, I think we need our own little duckpond.
 
Stella_Omega said:
Versus the cuck and CD chatter, anyway. And of course, the guys who hate men and also hate pussy. Lots of those. homo-gyno-phobes.

yep, I think we need our own little duckpond.
Click to expand...

Good for you, but I would never hate the extreme beauty of the vulva, and the sexiness of it. And I like the beauty of the penis, and if I have not written this in the past. Then let me be perfectly clear, when I see a beautiful transsexual. Then I would NEVER ever go into the whole woman hating thing, you are saying some men have. Hell, I would probably worship the lady. Oh yeah I have already mentioned, I see them as women. Also I am a bottom, so again I think when some man or woman wants to label me, then they see that I am much more complex than any label. And the reason is this, I am a human being who hate having labels. Cause labels reminds me of my teenage years, which were not always nice going through. Also Stella, please judge the individual. Not every body . Judge me, if you want. Whether I agree with you on your judgement of me or not. And Stella, if you think I hate you, then you are sadly mistaken. Hate is something that is too destructive for my taste. And that goes to S_B, and I mean both of them. But I could, and can get extremely irritated. But hey that is just human :)
 
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* cracks knuckles*

O.K., don't know who'll read this or if they know me, so I'll introduce...me.

I've been a member for a little while....I stumbled into Lit one night whilst searching for erotic stories...with a CD twist, because...well, I are one. Like most, I eventually found the forums, and found a little niche in the GLBT section, as there were other CD's around. I "met" a lot of deeply interesting people...and, of course, some not so great, but having this outlet has been a boon for me & my satisfaction with life. I have at times posted pictures ( of myself), admired others' contributions, and just generally admired the courage & resolve of some. More recently, I post massive quanities of silliness in the playground because...well, silly I am. Many, many people have messaged me with heartfelt questions & surprisingly supportive comment..because I don't hide my persuasions from the masses; I use it as part of my persona. Point is, much ground has been covered by being positive. Sure; there are a few who don't want to post with me, and that's fine. I can't MAKE them be comfortable with a dude in a dress.
That said, people who want to have fun, while being a bit off kilter.....need a place to call their own. People whose concerns run deeper than the surface need their own place. Not segregation, so much as just different buildings within the same campus. I occasionally feel a need to ponder a bit more deeply about what's going on in my brain; and in those times, I value the company of people whose struggles have been far more than mine. Other times, I want to be superficial and show off my new heels. These days, GLBT is chock full of fantasy and/or fetish threads, with seemingly few for G/L people.

I have been witness to occasions where threads have been attacked for not belonging here; one in particular because it was started by a "straight" male.....even though most of the respondents were bi women. I personally defended the op in that case...Yes, it may have been poor judgement on his part; but there was no BETTER place for the thread. His attackers were offended by the principle of a straight man posting in GLBT...it got very nasty, and shouldn't have. I think this sort of thing could and should be avoided by branching out.....Exactly what parameters; I don't know. People like myself need a place...but I can understand that maybe one common vat of "non-vanilla" is not a great idea.

Let me point out flatly; I am not anti-ANYBODY here....I am just antinegativism.... If we can't all share the space without being offended; let's split the sheets. * looks in vain for the olive branch smiley.....*
 
I think that's what I mean; there are SO many flavors of queer, and not all of them taste great together. Really not.
Thanks, Blade_Rocknut.
 
Wolfman1982 said:
Cause for once, I would like to hear her opinion upon the matter.
Click to expand...
So kind of you...! :rolleyes:

My opinion is that you're both right. Wolfman is right that the GL and BT discussions are pretty well split. Stella is right that the answer is a Fetishists forum.

I've wanted one for a long time. Every time a foot fetish discussion ends up in BDSM Talk, every time a panty fetish discussion ends up in GLBT Chatter, I long for a fetish forum. Lactation, macrophilia, shemales...we have lots of fetish threads all over Lit, and it would be nice to see them consolidated. We have a Fetish category on the story side, why not on the forum side?

As blade_rocknut says, there are few threads here that are "actually" gay and lesbian. That was never the intent, the forum has always been supposed to be for everyone. But as many posters have noted, the flood of fantasy/fetish threads drives the queer folks away...they feel like they won't be noticed here.

I will forever maintain that this forum is GLBT, not Gay and Lesbian. Bisexuals and transgender people belong here too. (You can argue that Ts have different issues than GLBs. Well yes. GLs have different issues from Bs too. And Gs have different issues from Ls. We won't have four forums, so let's be friends.)

But this forum is not the ideal place for heterosexual people to discuss their fetishes, even if those fetishes involve pretending to be the opposite gender. To clarify: talking about what your girlfriend thinks of you wearing her bras is fetish, talking about what your girlfriend thinks of your gender dysphoria is GLBT.

Who's going to make the declaration whether something is GLBT vs fetish? Well, I am, I guess. And whoever ends up moderating a Fetishists forum. Which is another issue - somebody would have to moderate it if it existed. This needs to be someone trusted and non-contentious. And someone who is interested in the forum itself, generally.

So that's my take on it. I'd like to have a Fetishes forum, and keep GLBT Chatter as-is. What do you guys think of that? I'm happy to bring up the issue with Laurel if/when a consensus is reached. :rose:
 
blade_rocknut said:
* cracks knuckles*

O.K., don't know who'll read this or if they know me, so I'll introduce...me.

I've been a member for a little while....I stumbled into Lit one night whilst searching for erotic stories...with a CD twist, because...well, I are one. Like most, I eventually found the forums, and found a little niche in the GLBT section, as there were other CD's around. I "met" a lot of deeply interesting people...and, of course, some not so great, but having this outlet has been a boon for me & my satisfaction with life. I have at times posted pictures ( of myself), admired others' contributions, and just generally admired the courage & resolve of some. More recently, I post massive quanities of silliness in the playground because...well, silly I am. Many, many people have messaged me with heartfelt questions & surprisingly supportive comment..because I don't hide my persuasions from the masses; I use it as part of my persona. Point is, much ground has been covered by being positive. Sure; there are a few who don't want to post with me, and that's fine. I can't MAKE them be comfortable with a dude in a dress.
That said, people who want to have fun, while being a bit off kilter.....need a place to call their own. People whose concerns run deeper than the surface need their own place. Not segregation, so much as just different buildings within the same campus. I occasionally feel a need to ponder a bit more deeply about what's going on in my brain; and in those times, I value the company of people whose struggles have been far more than mine. Other times, I want to be superficial and show off my new heels. These days, GLBT is chock full of fantasy and/or fetish threads, with seemingly few for G/L people.

I have been witness to occasions where threads have been attacked for not belonging here; one in particular because it was started by a "straight" male.....even though most of the respondents were bi women. I personally defended the op in that case...Yes, it may have been poor judgement on his part; but there was no BETTER place for the thread. His attackers were offended by the principle of a straight man posting in GLBT...it got very nasty, and shouldn't have. I think this sort of thing could and should be avoided by branching out.....Exactly what parameters; I don't know. People like myself need a place...but I can understand that maybe one common vat of "non-vanilla" is not a great idea.

Let me point out flatly; I am not anti-ANYBODY here....I am just antinegativism.... If we can't all share the space without being offended; let's split the sheets. * looks in vain for the olive branch smiley.....*
Click to expand...


Okay, a couple of things -

I certainly don't begrudge anybody for wanting a "place". I also don't have an issue with cross dressing just cuz you like it! :D

That said, the LGBTQ community has fought long and hard to gain what little we have. You mentioned the str8 guy in your post. I remember him. He was a str8 guy who started a thread asking women to describe their lesbian sex experiences to him and he was getting off on it. I don't have a problem with him getting off on it and if people want to describe their experiences to him fine - JUST NOT HERE.

This is our tiny little slice of this huge site and, yes, I guess some of us defend it passionately. There are literally dozens of threads and forums where virtually any kind or fetish is accepted, hell in fact welcomed. I just don't see why the "eating your own cum" and the "let me whack off to your dirty little life" threads can't go there.

You see SOME of us, most especially the true gays, lesbians and TGs, get enough of being monkeys in a cage and having people either ogle us or fill our house with their own furniture.

Sorry, but that's how I feel.

That kind of also applies to having some non gay asshat self describe himself as the defender of gays and lesbians. It's not welcome and is actually pretty insulting when you look at it. We can defend ourselves. We don't need some non-gay guy being our spokes model, opening doors for us or trying to be "Mr. Freakin' Gay and Lesbian Defender".
 
Etoile said:
So kind of you...! :rolleyes:

My opinion is that you're both right. Wolfman is right that the GL and BT discussions are pretty well split. Stella is right that the answer is a Fetishists forum.

I've wanted one for a long time. Every time a foot fetish discussion ends up in BDSM Talk, every time a panty fetish discussion ends up in GLBT Chatter, I long for a fetish forum. Lactation, macrophilia, shemales...we have lots of fetish threads all over Lit, and it would be nice to see them consolidated. We have a Fetish category on the story side, why not on the forum side?

As blade_rocknut says, there are few threads here that are "actually" gay and lesbian. That was never the intent, the forum has always been supposed to be for everyone. But as many posters have noted, the flood of fantasy/fetish threads drives the queer folks away...they feel like they won't be noticed here.

I will forever maintain that this forum is GLBT, not Gay and Lesbian. Bisexuals and transgender people belong here too. (You can argue that Ts have different issues than GLBs. Well yes. GLs have different issues from Bs too. And Gs have different issues from Ls. We won't have four forums, so let's be friends.)

But this forum is not the ideal place for heterosexual people to discuss their fetishes, even if those fetishes involve pretending to be the opposite gender. To clarify: talking about what your girlfriend thinks of you wearing her bras is fetish, talking about what your girlfriend thinks of your gender dysphoria is GLBT.

Who's going to make the declaration whether something is GLBT vs fetish? Well, I am, I guess. And whoever ends up moderating a Fetishists forum. Which is another issue - somebody would have to moderate it if it existed. This needs to be someone trusted and non-contentious. And someone who is interested in the forum itself, generally.

So that's my take on it. I'd like to have a Fetishes forum, and keep GLBT Chatter as-is. What do you guys think of that? I'm happy to bring up the issue with Laurel if/when a consensus is reached. :rose:
Click to expand...

I would be fine with your proposed solution and I trust your judgment as to determining what is and what is not LGBTQ related. I also don't want to separate the LGBTQ community because in spite of our differences I think we are stronger together. I also don't personally see a great divide between the L, G & TG communities. The only MAJOR area of contention I have is when the B's go off on non LGBTQ tangents, but you have previously addressed that so I'll give it a pass.
 
Safe_Bet said:
I would be fine with your proposed solution and I trust your judgment as to determining what is and what is not LGBTQ related. I also don't want to separate the LGBTQ community because in spite of our differences I think we are stronger together. I also don't personally see a great divide between the L, G & TG communities. The only MAJOR area of contention I have is when the B's go off on non LGBTQ tangents, but you have previously addressed that so I'll give it a pass.
Click to expand...

I think some bisexual concerns are the same, and some are different. If it's about how to approach your boyfriend about letting you date a girl on the side, because you really want to have both in your life, that would be fine with me for this forum. If it's about getting your boyfriend to have a threesome with a girl...that's just sexy talk, all threesomes will always involve a bi component somewhere, that doesn't need to be here.

And yes, I agree that we are stronger together!
 
Safe_Bet said:
Okay, a couple of things -

I certainly don't begrudge anybody for wanting a "place". I also don't have an issue with cross dressing just cuz you like it! :D

That said, the LGBTQ community has fought long and hard to gain what little we have. You mentioned the str8 guy in your post. I remember him. He was a str8 guy who started a thread asking women to describe their lesbian sex experiences to him and he was getting off on it. I don't have a problem with him getting off on it and if people want to describe their experiences to him fine - JUST NOT HERE.

This is our tiny little slice of this huge site and, yes, I guess some of us defend it passionately. There are literally dozens of threads and forums where virtually any kind or fetish is accepted, hell in fact welcomed. I just don't see why the "eating your own cum" and the "let me whack off to your dirty little life" threads can't go there.

You see SOME of us, most especially the true gays, lesbians and TGs, get enough of being monkeys in a cage and having people either ogle us or fill our house with their own furniture.Sorry, but that's how I feel.

That kind of also applies to having some non gay asshat self describe himself as the defender of gays and lesbians. It's not welcome and is actually pretty insulting when you look at it. We can defend ourselves. We don't need some non-gay guy being our spokes model, opening doors for us or trying to be "Mr. Freakin' Gay and Lesbian Defender".
Click to expand...

Well put.
I don't mean to open a scab regarding that thread; merely referencing that as a situation which could and should be avoided...
 
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But as many posters have noted, the flood of fantasy/fetish threads drives the queer folks away...they feel like they won't be noticed here.
Click to expand...

Um, no. A lot of people leave because they see their reality being treated like a lap dance. Which is always the problem with fetishes, sadly...

Seems to me some of the threads that turn up here and in BDSM-- could go into the Playground. (But Blade might be able to tell us that it's mostly hetero over there)

What about a "Fetish playground" as an adjunct to GLBT chatter? It would be a tail that wags the dog for sure, as far as posting volume goes...

Which is why I figure it's easier for the mods if we rename the current GLBT forum and move the actually GLBT threads to a new GLBT forum, as posters request them. Because yanno-- those of us who are motivated will re-bookmark. The dudes who want a dick without a man attached to it-- they won't care. They are not gay, nor even bi-- queer, yeah, but hetero queer.
 
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Stella_Omega said:
Um, no. A lot of people leave because they see their reality being treated like a lap dance. Which is always the problem with fetishes, sadly...

Seems to me some of the threads that turn up here and in BDSM-- could go into the Playground. (But Blade might be able to tell us that it's mostly hetero over there)

What about a "Fetish playground" as an adjunct to GLBT chatter? It would be a tail that wags the dog for sure, as far as posting volume goes...

Which is why I figure it's easier for the mods if we rename the current GLBT forum and move the actually GLBT threads to a new GLBT forum, as posters request them. Because yanno-- those of us who are motivated will re-bookmark. The dudes who want a dick without a man attached to it-- they won't care. They are not gay, nor even bi-- queer, yeah, but hetero queer.
Click to expand...

Mostly hetero topics in the playground; yes. As for the participants? Seems as though most of the women are bi; or enjoying fantasizing that way. A fair quantity of men are as well. Fetish forum sounds great to me, though. That way; anyone entering should know that there WILL be threads about things they don't want to see.....and they can navigate past those to whatever they want.
 
Safe_Bet: Hey I am NOT an asshat, I may be a hotheaded , emotional and passionate human being, and person. But calling me an asshat, is something I am not. And I will probably vote for a woman this time when the election time comes this year in Denmark.
And Etoile, I will gladly be the moderator of the fetishist forum. Cause I know moderators needs to Gandhis . When it comes to moderating, in many ways. And you have taught me, quite a lot when it comes to moderating. After all, of my own personal world wide web top ten, then you are among the top there.
 
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Hi all, I'm feeling kinda meek, and yet horribly desperate, all of the suddenly.

I am pansexual.

I don't say that so I sound more special then bi-sexuals. I'll happily use the word 'bisexual' to avoid confusion with people who don't know the term 'pansexual' or simply because it's the more common title, even if not technically correct. I don't like just red and blue; I like red, blue and all of their shades of purple in between. :)

Now that I've clarified my point, I feel the need to flat out beg. Please, please don't kick me out of the G/L group. Please. Pan/Bisexual's need the same sorta help, advice, support and love that the Gs and Ls do. Just some times we need both.

(And on to the actual topic. I agree with Mr. Stella, his awesome dude-ness, I think that we need two separate forums for GLB(/P)T and the cock loving heteros. It's a fetish. And don't get me wrong, I have fetishes as well, god knows if there is a "men/women in shit kicker boots photo thread", I'll be all over that! Just not in the Gay forums, please? We need our safe space.))
 
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Lady_In_Black: not to sound like a "know it all", but pansexuality/omnisexuality is a part of "bisexuality". Even though it does not need to be, cause I some times consider myself more omni and pan, than just bi. Anyway that is my opinion about it. So I could be totally wrong.
 
Wolfman1982 said:
Safe_Bet: Hey I am NOT an asshat, I may be a hotheaded , emotional and passionate human being, and person. But calling me an asshat, is something I am not. And I will probably vote for a woman this time when the election time comes this year in Denmark.
And Etoile, I will gladly be the moderator of the fetishist forum. Cause I know moderators needs to Gandhis . When it comes to moderating, in many ways. And you have taught me, quite a lot when it comes to moderating. After all, of my own personal world wide web top ten, then you are among the top there.
Click to expand...

Sorry hon, but in this very post you clarify why you can't be a moderator. You're not a Gandhi, you're a hothead.

As for the ease of moving threads and stuff, Laurel and I can worry about that. I don't think Fetish Playground (good name) should be a subforum of GLBT though.

Stella, you may be right about why some people leave. I've only received complaints about not being noticed, or lost in the flood. If you've heard complaints about being fetishized then I can certainly see where they're coming from, but I haven't heard of people LEAVING because of it. (Complaints and outrage yes, but not leaving.)

More later...
 
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Etoile: Can I not both be a hothead and a Gandhi ? or is that an impossibility ?
Even Gandhi had his bad days. Even though he was very masochistic with his non violence, if I am allowed to make a tiny joke about one of the greatest people who have ever lived. But I must add one thing to the moderator equation, I am not/would not be a demigod if I became a moderator. Cause to me, the most important part of being a moderator is being a normal member with a few extra options, since banning some body is the administrators option. Not the moderators.
 
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Wolfman1982 said:
I will gladly be the moderator of the fetishist forum...
Click to expand...

Bookmarked as quite possibly the worst idea in the history of mankind. ;)


BTW, dude -

Definition: Ass-Hat

One who is clueless, moronic, and unworthy of attention. But ia a perpetual attention whore.

'President Obama is an absolute 'Ass-Hat'.
 
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Safe_Bet said:
Bookmarked as quite possibly the worst idea in the history of mankind. ;)
Click to expand...

Oh well, at least I was the first to raise the hand to take up the mantle , when it came to it. Cause I used to be a moderator on a forum. That has been closed down since. But I liked being a member with a few extra options, and no I was NOT a demigod.
 
I think one big thing to point out is this:

You ever seen Etoile refer to herself as "NOT a demigodd(ess)"?

Stating that you "wouldn't be bad" is not a sign of your competence. And loads of people have moderated forums. I did it on my brother's Star Wars RP forum, that doesn't make me qualified to do it here.

On another note, why am I continuing this divergence from the real point of this topic? Why are you? Cause we shouldn't be moderators!
 
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