Free Association Thread 5

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It's the bell curve, HP. There are just as many people below the median as there are above. Scary, isn't it? :)

Positively frightening.
What makes it worse is that some of them breed and even [sh h h] vote.

But I guess they can just as easily say the same :)
 
it's the silent P that gets them every time. :)

The Silent English Phonetic Alphabet:-


A as in BREAD
B as in DEBT
C as in INDICTMENT
D as in HANDKERCHIEF
E as in GIVE
F as in HALFPENNY
G as in GNAW
H as in HOUR
I as in FRIEND
J as in MARIJUANA
K as in KNOW
L as in CALM
M as the first M in MNEMONIC
N as in AUTUMN
O as in PEOPLE
P as in PSALM
Q as in COLQUHOUN (a Scottish surname)
R as in FORECASTLE
S as in ISLAND
T as in CASTLE
U as in GUARD
V as in MILNGAVIE (a Scottish place name)
W as in WRONG
X as in SIOUX
Y as in PEPYS
Z as in RENDEZVOUS
 
The Silent English Phonetic Alphabet:-


A as in BREAD
B as in DEBT
C as in INDICTMENT
~~~~
W as in WRONG
X as in SIOUX
Y as in PEPYS
Z as in RENDEZVOUS

Yes, English can certainly be weird, but it can be understood through tough thorough thought, though. :D

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Many years ago, I visited Paris, for the first time, on my way back from working on a TV series in Rome. I had learned French in school – well, sort of. And so, on the train from Rome to Paris I carefully rehearsed what I would say when I reached my hotel.

When I got to the check-in desk I confidently greeted the receptionist, explained who I was, and explained that I had a reservation for two nights. The longer I spoke, the more the man behind the desk frowned. Eventually, he held up a hand and said: ‘Pardon, monsieur. I do not speak Italian. But I do speak English – if that’s any help.’

French? Italian? Why do these things have to be so damned complicated? :D
 
Come on, HP...where's your sense of adventure? Us Yanks are more than willing to share the fun. :D

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<Adopts a very stiff tone>
"I am not convinced, Sir, that we need that kind of humour, thank you."
<picks up newspaper (the Times or similar) and smokes pipe with some fury.>

"Second thoughts; I'll share a festive drink with you at any time, Old Boy."
 
<Adopts a very stiff tone>
"I am not convinced, Sir, that we need that kind of humour, thank you."
<picks up newspaper (the Times or similar) and smokes pipe with some fury.>

"Second thoughts; I'll share a festive drink with you at any time, Old Boy."

‘A magnum is the perfect size for two gentlemen if one of them is not drinking.’ - Winston Churchill
 
"How much do you drink?" the nurse asked me.

"Not nearly enough," I answered.

Following a really nasty cough (lasting three bloody weeks, with medical intervention writ large), I gave up smoking. A year or so later, I was back in the hospital for something or other (checks & tests) and a big butch Nurse, waving a clipboard shouted loud across the ward: "Do You Smoke?".

"I raised my voice to parade-ground standard and yelled "NO".
 
Following a really nasty cough (lasting three bloody weeks, with medical intervention writ large), I gave up smoking. A year or so later, I was back in the hospital for something or other (checks & tests) and a big butch Nurse, waving a clipboard shouted loud across the ward: "Do You Smoke?".

"I raised my voice to parade-ground standard and yelled "NO".

My PCP was doing my annual wellness check a few weeks ago and asked: "Are you still smoking?"

I tapped the pack in my shirt pocket and replied: "Nah, I just carry these around for people that want to bum one." :rolleyes:

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My PCP was doing my annual wellness check a few weeks ago and asked: "Are you still smoking?"

I tapped the pack in my shirt pocket and replied: "Nah, I just carry these around for people that want to bum one." :rolleyes:

.

A thoroughly charitable exercise, I'm sure [ :rolleyes: ]
 
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