So Fucking Stupid

Write a story about women in a small remote village that are jacking men off and smearing cum all over their bodies. Every woman in the village is doing this, and they don't care who the man is as long as he can squirt. They need to do this as often as possible.

The reason they are doing this is because the town has been invaded by giant alien insects that are repelled by the scent of human cum. If a woman isn't wearing the slimy repellant she risks being captured by one of the insects. If a woman is captured, the insect lays its eggs in the woman and she will be eaten by the insect's larvae when they hatch inside her.

The men in the village are not susceptible to the insects egg laying. They are simply eaten if captured, leaving the victims genitals behind where the man was killed and eaten. The village is fighting the insects with every thing they have, but they are losing the battle. The village is too remote to count on any kind of help from the outside.

The insects are multiplying and growing. There are insects everywhere. Many of the men in the village have been eaten by the insects and cum is in short supply. The few men that are left are giving their cum to the women that are still alive instead of using it for themselves.

The insects seem to be winning the battle. If the village can't defeat the insects, the insects will kill everyone and move on. Then all of mankind will be in danger from the insects. The situation couldn't be more dire.

End the story with an apology for misunderstanding one simple little word...


Then post it in the section with stories about incest.

You have to go into pretty hard sci-fi for this to function. I'm talking X-men, Power Rangers, Harry Potter level bullshit. Guys don't produce near enough cum to cover a woman. Have you ever seen a bukakke video?! Even with a dozen guys you'd still be lucky to get a woman's entire upper torso covered. So if men are in short supply you might as well swap in Erotic Horror and how the women feel as they are raped by the insects cus the guys are useless.

You also have to go back in time, at least to the 1940's if not even earlier than than that. A point in time without jets and satellites. Today there is no place on Earth so remote help couldn't get there within 12 hours if they gave a shit. Worst case scenario since these insects sound fairly dangerous is it gets treated like a zombie outbreak and the militaries of the world decide to carpet bomb the area until nothing is moving, then do it again a few times to be on the safe side of things. Best case scenario the bugs are only really dangerous because these people had limited amounts of guns and modern technology and when the Marines parachute in with body armor M16s, tanks and helicopter cover they make short work of the problem. So again you need to go back in time far enough that there were islands people had never found and King Kong was possible if implausible.

Or the just call the Orkin man.

Oh, and Raid Kills Bugs Dead!

Zeb_Carter said:

Or the just call the Orkin man.

Oh, and Raid Kills Bugs Dead!

Click to expand...

But then Spiderman (at least classic Spidey) can't come to help. Nor can Antman!

This is fucking hilarious.

The village is remote. Very remote. More remote than was the Greenlanders settlement at Scoresbysund at the turn of the last century. So remote that genes had neither flowed in nor out of the village in forty-two generations. Every mother's son was also her cousin. And brother. And lover. And grandson. And nephew as well. The population was completely, 100%, irrevocably homozygotic. A population weakened in immune response and just what the Hoppergrasses of Beta Centauri were looking for.

Their scouts had found the place, and the call was sent out. The Hoppergrasses needed mammalian type hosts for their own reproduction, and hominins were the most suitable. They were physically powerful, but any form of genetic variation was enough to stop their reproduction dead in its tracks. Hell, even a haploid hint of it was reppelant to them. Only pure bred, pure homozygotic homnins would serve. And they found the place. This place. This remote, fully inbred village.

The villagers fought long and hard, using semen, with its haploid sperm cells, as an anti-bug cream, but eventually its source dried up. Though they had managed some degree of reproduction, the struggle had left the Hoppergrasses weakened themselves. Desperately they set off to find more hosts for their parasitic larvae, but it was still the age of exploration on planet Earth, and wherever the beasts turned, population admixture brought them to their knees. The last breeding female landed on Pitcairn Island, hoping this isolated outpost would provide a hominin female suitable for her ovipositor, but such was not to be. Pitcairn had just been populated by British mutineers and their Polynesian lady friends; their hybridization was more than even a living Hoppergrass could bear, and she expired in an interpopulational orgy of bihemispheric proportions.

Yes, this species of insect depended entirely on human incest for its survival, and despite all the stories on Lit, there wasn't enough of it to satisfy the needs of the Hoppergrasses.

But many people mistake the word incest for insect anyway. It's a simple transposition, an easy typo to make when in the heat of erotic writing. Sorry about that, folks.

Sean Renaud said:

But then Spiderman (at least classic Spidey) can't come to help. Nor can Antman!

Click to expand...

2 out of a million super heroes is not big loss.

A Starship troopers sex parody.

I will give huge kudos to an author with the balls to make it the men who have to wipe cum all over themselves and the women are immune.

Imagine that, the men being humiliated...oh, my now we are into science fiction....

Right, Sean?

No, that's not sci-fi. That's alternate universe stuff you're talking there. You know the world where MEN bought 50 Shades of Grey not women.

god, Sean,what a party pooper you are. I had visions of the Red Cross and the Red Crescent holding worldwide cum drives to help out this desperate village.

Please go to your local cum dump and Contribute today!

Of course if this story wasn't just a huge joke in the first place, and it was written to actually take place in modern times. There would be no need to call out the troops or carpet bomb infested areas. I am sure science would come up with a cheap artificial cum to repel the alien insects.

I am also sure this artificial cum would be available in grocery stores everywhere. I'm thinking the best packaging for the product would be to use the same type of can that is used for pressurized whipped cream.

And no doubt, it would have to be called... wait for it... "Ready Splodge"

You might be able to help Rogue25

I'm sold. If you write it, I'll give it a shot. Rogue25 was concerned about Making Blackmail Believable. He's having a problem with plausibility which clearly you have licked. About these insects and cum, tell me more. Wrap your concept around some good characters and I'm sure there will be some of us read it and enjoy it. You're not trying to get his past the editors of the Journal of Science, just a few of us pervs on Literotica.