Feedback on my 2nd story please

My second story “Sandstone Cottage” has just been published so once again I’m asking for constructive advice please. The criticisms about “Cherry” seemed to be in respect of grammar; punctuation; and my selecting the wrong category. I acknowledge all that and have attempted to improve. I also took what I believe was a sensible decision and sought advice as to which category.

I believe that this story is better than my first and I want my third story to be better than this one. I don’t expect the standard of my writing to be up to the standard of more experienced writers but I would like to think that might be the case one day.


https://www.literotica.com/s/sandstone-cottage

Much improved in all respects.

I do have some quibbles with word choice, but they may be effects of the UK/US divide. "fed up of" rather than "fed up with" and "retiring age" instead of "retirement age".

It seems like one more read through might have been useful, but those are minor stumbles. You are on the right track.

Thank you Melissa. Your opinion means a lot. As regards the UK/US divide I did make a concession with “ass” instead of “arse” for the benefit of US readers.

Emirus said:

Thank you Melissa. Your opinion means a lot. As regards the UK/US divide I did make a concession with “ass” instead of “arse” for the benefit of US readers.

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You are welcome. And thank YOU, you were my 100th follower.