Red's Thread - come in and read a bit, post a bit, and lick a bit... okay... alot!!!
- Thread starter RedHairedandFriendly
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RjThoughts
I'm The Rojodi!
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Thank you Brett
Scentofawoman
shifting my paradigms
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Hi Red! Everyone!
Wow we had really crazy at my house. My cousins came in from India and my sister is in from NYC. I loved the fireworks, watermelon, lemonaid, and BBQ!
Watching tennis with the family. My dads rooting for Murray. My sister is sorting through old pictures.
I feel like I need a vacation.
Wow we had really crazy at my house. My cousins came in from India and my sister is in from NYC. I loved the fireworks, watermelon, lemonaid, and BBQ!
Watching tennis with the family. My dads rooting for Murray. My sister is sorting through old pictures.
I feel like I need a vacation.
RjThoughts
I'm The Rojodi!
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I can understand needing a vacation!
papadoc19
Good at keeping secrets..
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Do you think they will happen to re-name Henman Hill?
RjThoughts
I'm The Rojodi!
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I'd post in yours but I don't think you'd want to know about the company picnic and all the food I ate, while watching the "perfect" programmers get undressed verbally by a couple of female servers
BrettJ
Romantic & Kinky nutbar
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One never knows.
My thread doesn't even get a post a month now and I used to get pages every day. Oh well ...
I should send a note to RED and find out how she's doing. Tsk on her for ignoring us this long again.
BrettJ in Canada
My thread doesn't even get a post a month now and I used to get pages every day. Oh well ...
I should send a note to RED and find out how she's doing. Tsk on her for ignoring us this long again.
BrettJ in Canada
RjThoughts
I'm The Rojodi!
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I believe she might be enjoying work and forgot all about us peons 
RjThoughts
I'm The Rojodi!
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Sounds like homelife is interrupting her Lit life. Been there myself.
avrgblkgrl
Simply Delicious
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Thinking of you Red
Me too!
BrettJ
Romantic & Kinky nutbar
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No posts for all of August? Not good. I hope RED is okay.
The gentleman on your left is my father. Here is more about him. Sorry for hogging a space, I just thought some might be interested.
KEN CANAVAN
December 22 1933 - August 17 2013
It has now been 24 hours since I got the phone call from St. Mary's Hospital. I ran all the way there at this time of night, racing through the parking lot and hoping he would be alright. I live across the street, essentially, and so I was the first one called. I fought with my family about this, as they thought it should be my sister. I stood my ground. She is at least 15 minutes away - by car - and would have to get my mom and get her dressed and ready and such. Mom being 77, it is slow. My mom doesn't drive.
My family acted as they often do, but I won out - sort of. The call came to me, thank God it did. My sister was asleep when I called her, before leaving. I then called my Mom, who was up. She and my brother, in town to visit with dad, got in touch with my sister and they came. I was already there. I already had the news - my dad was gone. I was panting and soaked and they were worried I would faint. I thought I was fine, but I wasn't - not entirely. Nonetheless, when everyone showed up, I had to tell them. We all broke down and then we went to see him. It's so easy to see when the light has gone out. He wasn't there, not anymore.
We didn't think at all that this might be "it" when he went into the hospital two weeks ago. He'd had a fall, he had them before. His dementia, while not absent, wasn't a major problem. He wouldn't eat, but he was alert and they'd had him walking. I had seen him briefly that afternoon, although he said it had not been a good night. His pain was the worst, but under control. The plan was to move him to Freeport in a few weeks, let his broken clavicle heal and then begin physio. He wasn't going home, that he did not know. So perhaps this is for the best, but losing my father hurts like hell. How can this be for the best?
Life was not fair to my dad. He was brought up to believe if you worked hard and were loyal, you got the rewards. Not so for him. He got screwed over a few times. I don't think he ever understood it or got over it, not entirely. Some friends vanished, some outright stabbed him in the back. It was vile and reprehensible. Part of it was he was slow to adjust to modern times. But he worked hard and did his job and was ill-treated by a company he served for 15 years. A company who put so much stress on him that he had not one, but TWO, heart attacks.
In his life, he had 4 in total. We are still uncertain if he had a 5th and final one yesterday.
His family situation deteriorated as well. He and my mother had issues and split for a time, only to reunite - sort of. My mother can be hard and bitter, my dad showed his frailty and she didn't like it. They stayed married but a lot of it was name only. More on her part than his. He was fiercely loyal and whenever she needed something, she got it. I think a lot of her coldness mystified him as much as the betrayal of his friends. But yes, he could be demanding and needy and push her buttons. When they split, I lived with him for 2 years. My beloved Nana spoiled him a bit too much and he never understood that others weren't going to. I also don't think he ever got over the family situation with his sister. Basically, after 52 years of life on this earth, when my Nana passed, he found out his sister was - NOT - his sister. He was astonished to find out how many knew this secret and had been told to keep it from him. He was hurt, angry and bitter and lashed out. I loved my Nana dearly but it is the ONLY thing in this life that I am angry at her about. Why did she never tell him that his much-older sister was his cousin and that they had taken her in? Even years after, when I asked my aunt (I reconciled with her a bit) she couldn't answer.
My dad had few friends, he and I are alike in that. Some have passed, my Uncle Alan just before Christmas. His friends were my parents' friends, mostly. His work friends weren't loyal, for the most part.
He and I were not close for most of my life and only got so in more recent years. We started doing things together, like having coffee at least once a week. Usually at McD's, a coffee and a muffin for $1.50 - plus a refill - he thought that was great. It usually was too. I will miss those coffees more than I can ever say.
I don't think the rest of my family ever got him and I don't think he knew how to be "got". He had trouble expressing himself. I hope that wherever he is now, he's with his dad and my Nana and his sister. I hope there is peace. I hope he will say hello to some of my much-missed friends. I will close this entry now as I am tearing up and I could go on for days.
I miss my father. It has been just a few days without him and they've been agony.
BrettJ in Canada
The gentleman on your left is my father. Here is more about him. Sorry for hogging a space, I just thought some might be interested.
KEN CANAVAN
December 22 1933 - August 17 2013
It has now been 24 hours since I got the phone call from St. Mary's Hospital. I ran all the way there at this time of night, racing through the parking lot and hoping he would be alright. I live across the street, essentially, and so I was the first one called. I fought with my family about this, as they thought it should be my sister. I stood my ground. She is at least 15 minutes away - by car - and would have to get my mom and get her dressed and ready and such. Mom being 77, it is slow. My mom doesn't drive.
My family acted as they often do, but I won out - sort of. The call came to me, thank God it did. My sister was asleep when I called her, before leaving. I then called my Mom, who was up. She and my brother, in town to visit with dad, got in touch with my sister and they came. I was already there. I already had the news - my dad was gone. I was panting and soaked and they were worried I would faint. I thought I was fine, but I wasn't - not entirely. Nonetheless, when everyone showed up, I had to tell them. We all broke down and then we went to see him. It's so easy to see when the light has gone out. He wasn't there, not anymore.
We didn't think at all that this might be "it" when he went into the hospital two weeks ago. He'd had a fall, he had them before. His dementia, while not absent, wasn't a major problem. He wouldn't eat, but he was alert and they'd had him walking. I had seen him briefly that afternoon, although he said it had not been a good night. His pain was the worst, but under control. The plan was to move him to Freeport in a few weeks, let his broken clavicle heal and then begin physio. He wasn't going home, that he did not know. So perhaps this is for the best, but losing my father hurts like hell. How can this be for the best?
Life was not fair to my dad. He was brought up to believe if you worked hard and were loyal, you got the rewards. Not so for him. He got screwed over a few times. I don't think he ever understood it or got over it, not entirely. Some friends vanished, some outright stabbed him in the back. It was vile and reprehensible. Part of it was he was slow to adjust to modern times. But he worked hard and did his job and was ill-treated by a company he served for 15 years. A company who put so much stress on him that he had not one, but TWO, heart attacks.
In his life, he had 4 in total. We are still uncertain if he had a 5th and final one yesterday.
His family situation deteriorated as well. He and my mother had issues and split for a time, only to reunite - sort of. My mother can be hard and bitter, my dad showed his frailty and she didn't like it. They stayed married but a lot of it was name only. More on her part than his. He was fiercely loyal and whenever she needed something, she got it. I think a lot of her coldness mystified him as much as the betrayal of his friends. But yes, he could be demanding and needy and push her buttons. When they split, I lived with him for 2 years. My beloved Nana spoiled him a bit too much and he never understood that others weren't going to. I also don't think he ever got over the family situation with his sister. Basically, after 52 years of life on this earth, when my Nana passed, he found out his sister was - NOT - his sister. He was astonished to find out how many knew this secret and had been told to keep it from him. He was hurt, angry and bitter and lashed out. I loved my Nana dearly but it is the ONLY thing in this life that I am angry at her about. Why did she never tell him that his much-older sister was his cousin and that they had taken her in? Even years after, when I asked my aunt (I reconciled with her a bit) she couldn't answer.
My dad had few friends, he and I are alike in that. Some have passed, my Uncle Alan just before Christmas. His friends were my parents' friends, mostly. His work friends weren't loyal, for the most part.
He and I were not close for most of my life and only got so in more recent years. We started doing things together, like having coffee at least once a week. Usually at McD's, a coffee and a muffin for $1.50 - plus a refill - he thought that was great. It usually was too. I will miss those coffees more than I can ever say.
I don't think the rest of my family ever got him and I don't think he knew how to be "got". He had trouble expressing himself. I hope that wherever he is now, he's with his dad and my Nana and his sister. I hope there is peace. I hope he will say hello to some of my much-missed friends. I will close this entry now as I am tearing up and I could go on for days.
I miss my father. It has been just a few days without him and they've been agony.
BrettJ in Canada
RjThoughts
I'm The Rojodi!
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Sorry Brett
RjThoughts
I'm The Rojodi!
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Well, that happens
I found a picture of my dad from 1964, the year I was born. I bet you've seen men in Canada that would be his relatives.
BrettJ
Romantic & Kinky nutbar
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You were born the same year as my brother - he is the only one of us born here.
Not sure if you're implying something about his pic RJ, but that's what a lot of men looked like at the time. The pic at left of my father was taken last year before his health took a bit of a downturn.
BrettJ in Canada
Not sure if you're implying something about his pic RJ, but that's what a lot of men looked like at the time. The pic at left of my father was taken last year before his health took a bit of a downturn.
BrettJ in Canada
RjThoughts
I'm The Rojodi!
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What I meant was, Anglicized First Nation members. His mother was born on the then St. Regis reservation, now the Mohawk Nation of Akwesasne. There's a big Mohawk community in Ontario, between the Falls and TO.
BrettJ
Romantic & Kinky nutbar
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Yes, in my years as a DJ, I did a lot of gigs in Brantford. Lot of "Indians" there. It's funny how politically correct we've become.
I refuse to use the term "African American". Most of the people I meet around here are NOT from Africa and umm, we're not Americans.
BrettJ in Canada
I refuse to use the term "African American". Most of the people I meet around here are NOT from Africa and umm, we're not Americans.
BrettJ in Canada
RjThoughts
I'm The Rojodi!
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To me a hyphen means you're naturalized
Without it, you're decrying your ancestry
I have to say Native American. I work with many people from India or their children. Or, I say "Casino Indian" LOL
BrettJ
Romantic & Kinky nutbar
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I don't mind the term "Native" at all and / or "Indigenous". It is the American part I object to. This is Canada and sorry, don't give me that crap about it being North America. We have a lot of Jamaican and Islanders here and they don't want to be called African. I try to be as polite as possible, but we go overboard sometimes.
I'm a Mick / Scot / Brit Canadian.
BrettJ in Canada
I'm a Mick / Scot / Brit Canadian.
BrettJ in Canada
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