CD "Purging" (?) Do Other Gurls Do It?

SubmissiveMeaghan said:

Unfortunately I have done this on many occasions. Need a man to help make me the woman I am inside for one final time.

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SubmissiveMeaghan said:

Unfortunately I have done this on many occasions. Need a man to help make me the woman I am inside for one final time.

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StarrOftheNite said:

I've been crossdressing for twenty years plus, and have purged three times. Each time, my transgender imperative has come back to assert itself more strongly.

The first time I purged was about a year after I first bought an item of feminine apparel, and most of the things I threw away were items which were mostly poorly fitting and unflattering because I was buying a lot of stuff on Ebay and didn't have a good handle on sizes and styles. The urge came back fairly quickly, and I replenished my wardrobe with better things, and also bought a nice wig and some middling/decent drug store makeup.

The second time I purged was when my wife found my makeup kit, and I threw it out, along with some nice shoes, a couple of cocktail dresses, and some other odds and ends. My marriage was going sour for other reasons, and I bought a new wig and makeup rather quickly after the purge, and sort of kept things down to a dull roar in the closet. My wife moved out, and although her knowledge of my prior X-dressing was part of the problem, it was just one of several factors. I believe she had been having affairs, so I had started dating Transgender Girls in this period as a male Admirer, and when she moved out I sort of went crazy and bought several pair of shoes, a lot of everyday clothes like slacks, blouses and business skirts, block heel shoes, sneakers and sandals, and some better makeup. I also started dating men while I was in female presentation, and having sex with them at this time.

We divorced, sold the marital home, and I moved into a new apartment, and foolishly decided to purge and re-establish myself as a bachelor around town, dating the attractive divorcees,soon-to-be divorcees, and widows. As part of the process I did my third purge, which is the one I really, really regret. I still have memories about some of the dresses, slacks, skirts, et cetera, which I tossed out, and obviously it cost me quite a bit of money when the urge came back stronger than ever not long afterwards. My process of dating genetic women also died out about the same time, and I've been dating only males, masculine men and the occasional m2f transgender, ever since.

I'm old enough that I still bear all sorts of psychological scars inflicted by the prejudices of the homophobic, sexist, and generally bigoted era in which I grew up, so I still have occasional pangs of disgust and self-loathing. Nowadays when I do that I hang all my Fem clothes in the spare bedroom closet lock it, and place the key in a hard place to reach, I put my shoes in a big box sealed with heavy tape, and put a heavy piece of tape around my jewelry box. The urge to purge still occurs, but I've learned how to cope.

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