Hoo boy, I just love to look at the categories and laugh!(whyme)
Anywho, I have come to the lands popularly known as the Literotica Forums seeking an editor because, honestly, I've had crap for luck trying the Volunteer Editor Program. It feels like I'm spinning one of those 'test-your-luck' wheels, and even when I do net a friendly face, somehow, technical difficulties pop up and all contact is dropped like a hot sheet of metal.
In short, my story that I am seeking help for is entitled "Black Pearls - Ochia". It is the 4th segment of the Black Pearls series that I am writing. It follows a major character, Shella, as she wanders an endless ocean in a land without death, pain, or, to be honest, life. Pregnancy and Aging do not happen in this world that Shella has fallen into. She isn't alone, however, as her ship, a sailing ship, is alive and has an avatar called Lily.
"BP-Ochia" is about an encounter Shella has with Ochia, a 'sea-witch', a merfolk (or something like it) whose bottom half is mostly octopus. She doesn't have a mouth down there, to say the least.
It is, however, quite long. It is my longest story to date, at 17,236 words before editing. It contains, of course, lesbianism, tentacle play, and plot. I am seeking grammatical help, as well as serious, serious feedback. I want to know what sentences should be replaced and good suggestions for how. I am talking about, for lack of subtly, honest-to-goodness editing. I want the story to be good, and I've struggled with it for about a year, just finished it to my liking, and realize that I need to get to the next segment.
If you are at all interested, please send me a private message. I'll gladly take the help.
Anywho, I have come to the lands popularly known as the Literotica Forums seeking an editor because, honestly, I've had crap for luck trying the Volunteer Editor Program. It feels like I'm spinning one of those 'test-your-luck' wheels, and even when I do net a friendly face, somehow, technical difficulties pop up and all contact is dropped like a hot sheet of metal.
In short, my story that I am seeking help for is entitled "Black Pearls - Ochia". It is the 4th segment of the Black Pearls series that I am writing. It follows a major character, Shella, as she wanders an endless ocean in a land without death, pain, or, to be honest, life. Pregnancy and Aging do not happen in this world that Shella has fallen into. She isn't alone, however, as her ship, a sailing ship, is alive and has an avatar called Lily.
"BP-Ochia" is about an encounter Shella has with Ochia, a 'sea-witch', a merfolk (or something like it) whose bottom half is mostly octopus. She doesn't have a mouth down there, to say the least.
It is, however, quite long. It is my longest story to date, at 17,236 words before editing. It contains, of course, lesbianism, tentacle play, and plot. I am seeking grammatical help, as well as serious, serious feedback. I want to know what sentences should be replaced and good suggestions for how. I am talking about, for lack of subtly, honest-to-goodness editing. I want the story to be good, and I've struggled with it for about a year, just finished it to my liking, and realize that I need to get to the next segment.
If you are at all interested, please send me a private message. I'll gladly take the help.
