Why don't you post?

I think there are definitely two types of responders to threads here. One type is generally interested in the topic and either goes to it read the comments of others, or to comment themselves. The other type, and there are a lot of them here, go to threads to bash commenters on the thread for their comments that they posted. My feeling is that if you see a thread title regarding something that for whatever reason you don’t like don’t bother going there and telling everyone that you don’t like it while bashing the ones that do. We really don’t need that.

txgent101 said:

Some years back, when newsgroups were the main way of 'blogging' online, I found this advice which I think can still be true in Lit threads:

"The only way to deal with pests, trolls, flamers, and other trouble makers in news groups is to ignore them.
Do not reply to them.
Do not respond to them.
Do not try to refute them.
Do not try to convert them.
Do not try to answer them.
Do not try to reason with them.
In other words, ignore them completely. They will eventually tire of the game and go away. Do a ‘Block Sender’ or kill-file if you want, but shunning is the best remedy."

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This. So much this. A shame that too many like to poke them with a stick for this to ever work.

Hipshot1554 said:

1. Have you come to chat only, and found someone?

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I came for the stories and stayed for the free-er speech. I tend to take long breaks from Lit.

Hipshot1554 said:

2. Are you afraid of being found on a sex site?

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It's not something I would share with friends and family. People are far too judgey.

Hipshot1554 said:

3. Are you worried about reactions to your posts?

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Not as a general rule. I'm polite and tend not to stir the pot. It's usually pretty easy to see when someone is trying to troll and the best answer is no answer when that happens. This place would be so much better if only more people were able to exercise that kind of restraint.

I've never been an avid poster. More often than not, someone else has said what I wanted to say only with far more eloquence. Frequently, the interesting topics are something that I'm just not all that knowledgeable about, and as the old saying goes "it's better to be thought a fool than to open your mouth and remove all doubt."

It's also rather pointless because most of the threads I read are people with a certain viewpoint that are convinced they're right and any other viewpoint but theirs is completely wrong. The world is not that black and white.

I hang out far too often on the General Board. There are a lot of assholes there but some good people too. Once upon a time, it was fast paced and almost a necessity to bump your own threads if you wanted them to have a chance of being seen. Things have slowed down considerably and these days it's more of a political forum with pic threads than a place to discuss general topics. The denizens of the GB are sharks looking for weakness and only those with tough skins are still around.

txgent101 said:

Some years back, when newsgroups were the main way of 'blogging' online, I found this advice which I think can still be true in Lit threads:

"The only way to deal with pests, trolls, flamers, and other trouble makers in news groups is to ignore them.
Do not reply to them.
Do not respond to them.
Do not try to refute them.
Do not try to convert them.
Do not try to answer them.
Do not try to reason with them.
In other words, ignore them completely. They will eventually tire of the game and go away. Do a ‘Block Sender’ or kill-file if you want, but shunning is the best remedy."

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Yes like on my Facebook I can't be bothered with people who want to insult only and troll. It's pretty much...that's nice I can't be bothered.

Hipshot1554 said:

I'll throw out some questions for non posters, although anyone is welcomed to respond.

1. Have you come to chat only, and found someone?

2. Are you afraid of being found on a sex site?

3. Are you worried about reactions to your posts?

The more people post, the more interesting and varied this site will be.

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I'll answer question 3 first with a resounding 'yes.' I have found that many people on this site are very judgmental and narrow-minded, and some of them are not necessarily very nice about it either. That is probably the main reason that, on the rare occasions that I do post anymore, I will usually stick to the writer's help or technical advice forums, rather than the sex/erotic chat forums.

And don't get me wrong, I don't want to lump everyone in the same boat, and there are certainly plenty of wonderful, kind, open minded and caring people on here as well.

But the gist of it is, I have learned to be a lot more careful about what I say on here. Partly because my answer to #2 is also "yes." I know you can't moderate everyone; every person has a right to express themselves on here how they see fit, but I think a lot of things are best discussed off-line (private messages) rather than having some intimate detail about your personal sexual tastes ripped apart by troll posters.

Hipshot1554 said:

I was looking through the active users section and noticed that there are a large number of folks that have been members for quite a while but have never posted. It makes me wonder why not. I feel that with all those that don't post, there must be some that would have interesting things to share.

I'll throw out some questions for non posters, although anyone is welcomed to respond.

1. Have you come to chat only, and found someone?

2. Are you afraid of being found on a sex site?

3. Are you worried about reactions to your posts?

The more people post, the more interesting and varied this site will be.

Click to expand...

I mainly came to browse, finding someone I enjoy chatting to was just a bonus!

Yes, I take my anonymity very seriously. I don’t talk about my jobs, or specifically where I live. I want to have fun exploring a side I don’t show in daily life!

Yes I do get worried about reactions to my posts, and yes it did put me off posting for a long time! The majority of my posting history is from the past year. I decided that as long as I keep my real life and my lit life completely separate, I can post and say whatever I want. It has got me posting a lot more!

I do post but it doesn't always go well. Often when I do post, I get men PMing me and looking for stuff I'm not interested in. Even got a woman who wanted something and I'm not into that. And the other day I had a guy ask me to take my reply to him down. Sheesh. This is a public forum. At least I thought it was.

I have a thick skin. Some others may not. This could stop them from posting.

I post now and then but I'm not on here enough to become a "regular" on any threads and it's sort of awkward trying to interject into conversations when you're not. Also not into a lot of the really specific topics that get a lot of random posts.

Hipshot1554 said:

I was looking through the active users section and noticed that there are a large number of folks that have been members for quite a while but have never posted. It makes me wonder why not. I feel that with all those that don't post, there must be some that would have interesting things to share.

I'll throw out some questions for non posters, although anyone is welcomed to respond.

1. Have you come to chat only, and found someone?

2. Are you afraid of being found on a sex site?

3. Are you worried about reactions to your posts?

The more people post, the more interesting and varied this site will be.

Click to expand...

1-- I came to Lit originally via a friend who sent me an audio link that she thought I would love. I was on that side of Lit for a good month or two before even finding the forums. It would be lovely to meet someone that is emotionally and physically available but I don't hold my breathe waiting for it.

2-- Not afraid of being found on a sex site but I don't share personal information either so it would be hard for someone from my "real" world to know it's me.

3-- Yes and yes. There are some lovely people on this site but just as many assholes that tend to speak up more. I have definitely had some private PMs sent to me because of an answer I gave in a thread that was anything but nice. Some people just lie outright which is the number one way to lose my interest. I can forgive almost anything but lying. If you can't trust a potential friend, what is left?

The other responses have been people demanding information from me or proof that I am female and it's honestly very intrusive. I realize there are a great number of female imposters on this site but I am not one of them and to demand proof outright upfront is a red flag for me. I feel bad for the person requesting it as that tells me they have been burned before but that isn't my fault and I won't divulge personal info right off the bat to appease them.

I also feel like most times the threads seem to be a conversation between people who have been here a great deal longer than I have and I feel like I am intruding by posting an answer among their replies. It's pretty obvious too as you are either ignored outright or the conversation suddenly ceases and no more replies take place. I feel really badly about those so it's made me shy about responding.

I am a shy person in the "real" world and confrontation is not my thing. Drama is a huge turnoff for me. Having said all this, I will gladly admit to conversing with some really delightful people from time to time. I hold out hope that there are more of them than assholes. They are probably too shy to speak up as well.

1. Have you come to chat only, and found someone?
Nope
2. Are you afraid of being found on a sex site?
Not particularly (although I don't want my mother stumbling across it)
3. Are you worried about reactions to your posts?
Not particularly, but I am worried about getting unwanted messages in my inbox. I get it, it's a sex site... but I mostly come here to read others and post my own stories, and lurk in the forums for interesting topics. I don't come here to find someone to sext with.

I used to post more and don't post much now. The reason is because I think most people here have fucking boring taste in erotica.

Wait a minute......

You are asking people who don't post, to post why they don't post?

Irony?

Klinkster said:

Wait a minute......

You are asking people who don't post, to post why they don't post?

Irony?

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Could be...

Klinkster said:

Wait a minute......

You are asking people who don't post, to post why they don't post?

Irony?

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Actually, for me, the answer is simple: with few exceptions, I typically do not post anything unless I have something I want to say — not to mention that my time is usually limited.

I have known about and visited Literotica for years; but incredibly, I never realized that it had a forum until this year — so I finally joined as a member and started posting.

I am not worried about reactions to what I post, as no one can ever please all of the people all of the time.

As for being afraid of being found on a “sex site”, I am simply vigilant about keeping my personal information private — unless I feel with the rare exception that I can trust someone enough to reveal at least some of it.

I came here to chat for a specific reason; but I like to keep an open mind.

There are some members of Literotica whom I would not mind getting to know better — but that remains to be seen...

hipshot1554 queried:
1. have you come to chat only, and found someone?

2. are you afraid of being found on a sex site?

3. are you worried about reactions to your posts?

the more people post, the more interesting and varied this site will be.

Click to expand...

1. no, i only ever spent time here to share what i knew and hang with people i got to know in a strictly platonic fashion. i know, that probably sounds weird, but there you go.

2. nah, not the way i do things here anywya.

3. pfft, being online and being afraid of online reactions seems really goofy to me.

ed

Hipshot1554 said:

I was looking through the active users section and noticed that there are a large number of folks that have been members for quite a while but have never posted. It makes me wonder why not. I feel that with all those that don't post, there must be some that would have interesting things to share.

I'll throw out some questions for non posters, although anyone is welcomed to respond.

1. Have you come to chat only, and found someone?

2. Are you afraid of being found on a sex site?

3. Are you worried about reactions to your posts?

The more people post, the more interesting and varied this site will be.

Click to expand...

1. Hehe, I have come here for the exact opposite: to post.

2. No. I am waiting for that time to see photos of me used on some porn site.

3. Not at all, though sometimes I become sensitive, I end up rationalizing things. We have our own opinion, we should be respecting each other's reaction.

I agree to your last sentence. I will post more

I post occasionally.

Hm. That sounds rather defensive.

I will say reason #2, the thought of being discovered. I hate to have one of my post come back and bite me in the ass.

I'm shy

Because there aren't any women here, only men.

The 5-year anniversary of my Lit membership is today, but I’m still short of the 100 posts required to get an avatar photo. And yet some people have tens of thousands of posts! It seems almost inconceivable that someone could spend that much time online.

I officially joined Lit (after 3-4 years of lurking) so I could submit stories. My only reason for even going to the forums was to get info about how to write and submit stories on Lit and get them edited. Essentially all my forum time was spent in the Authors Hangout or the Editors Forum. To me, every hour spent in a forum (other than those two) was an hour that could have been spent on writing my stories.

And yet … here I am roaming around on a seldom viewed forum, hoping to crawl closer to the 100 post finish line.

It wasn’t that long ago when I absent mindedly scrolled down past the Editors Forum and the Story Discussion Circle to discover there were many other forums, including one where Lit members (mostly female) post nude photos of themselves! Congratulations to any woman who is that bold (or careless – or is that ‘couldn’t care less’) to put it all out there, so to speak. A number of these posters are incredibly inventive and professional wrt posing, lighting, costuming, props, and themes. Who knew?

Hipshot1554 said:

I was looking through the active users section and noticed that there are a large number of folks that have been members for quite a while but have never posted. It makes me wonder why not. I feel that with all those that don't post, there must be some that would have interesting things to share.

I'll throw out some questions for non posters, although anyone is welcomed to respond.

1. Have you come to chat only, and found someone?

2. Are you afraid of being found on a sex site?

3. Are you worried about reactions to your posts?

The more people post, the more interesting and varied this site will be.

Click to expand...

I came to Lit initially with the idea of writing. However, I ended up meeting someone here very early on, and my idea of writing erotica morphed a bit...

I would prefer that my friends and family NOT know I post here.

At times I have received some negative reactions to posts. I have stopped myself from posting at times because of the fear of derogatory responses. I don't get too many reactions one way or the other to my posts within threads because I think I try too hard not to offend people, but I do sometimes get PMs.

I don’t post every time I log in. Sometimes there’s nothing interesting, other times I see how easy it would be to insert myself into an argument and don’t want to waste time. NMFP