Movie Quotes

"Donkey! You *have* the right to remain silent. What you lack is the capacity!" Shrek, Shrek 2

"Look at our little mutant babies!" Donkey, Shrek 2

"Poor Winston's idea of foreplay was, 'Brace yourself, Effie.'"


Everybody ready for Mrs. Doubtfire 2?

Them people back there, they wasn't normal.
Normal people don't spit out bullets when you shoot 'em.

Tim Thomerson, 'Near Dark'

"It's hard to stop talking about something so huge. I could go on and on about his cock, bone, nob, bishop, wang, thang, hotrod. Hump mobile, Oscar, dong, dagger, banana, cucumber, salami. Sausage, kielbasa, schlong, dink, tool, Big Ben, Mister Happy, prick, disk, pecker, peter, pee-pee, wee-wee, weiner, pisser, pistol, joint, hose, horn, middle-leg, third-leg, meat, stick, joystick, dipstick, junior, the little head, little guy, Rumple Foreskin, Tootsie Roll. Snake, one-eyed monster, one-eyed wonder, shaft, sword, meat whistle, skin flute, love muscle, Roto-Rooter, instrument, banger, rammer, ramrod, cherrypicker, log, pole."

Angela, Four Rooms

(gurgles through vomit-spewing lips)

"Jesus fucking Christ! What the fuck is this?"

When Ted discovers the dead hooker in the mattress. Four Rooms

I just now decided to enter this thread and I have no clue which quotes have already been posted and which not.

But I'm the same way. Good qords, lines, dialogue and story do the most for me in a movie.

So I'll post my favorites time and again.

Yesterday I watched 'The Usual Suspects'

Keyser Soze - 'They greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world, he doesn't exist'.

Snoopy

SnoopDog said:

I just now decided to enter this thread and I have no clue which quotes have already been posted and which not.

Click to expand...

Post anything you'd like, Snoop. And don't worry if they've been posted before - if they're that good, they bear repeating.

logophile said:

Post anything you'd like, Snoop. And don't worry if they've been posted before - if they're that good, they bear repeating.

Click to expand...

I think you're right. Some quotes you can't get enough of.

By the way, I think in cool quotes and clever lines the true capability of an actor really shows. Ever exoerience how some lines are pretty good when you read them but the actor really has such a bad delivery that the whole thing sounds chees?

I also love these quote-threads because it inspires me to watch movies I haven't seen in quite a while.

Here's another.

'I'm just not too crazy about boats.'
'My god Caffee, you're in the Navy for crying out loud.'

- Tom Cruise and Demi Moore in 'A Few Good Men'.


Snoopy

'Alive! It's alive.' - Far too many movies to list.

The way I see it, we've got 650 years of knowledge on these guys. There's no reason why we shouldn't be able to get out of here and home in 20 minutes.

"Fuck it, Dude. Let's go bowling."

---John Goodman, The Big Lebowski

Quiet_Cool said:

"Fuck it, Dude. Let's go bowling."

---John Goodman, The Big Lebowski

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Lol.

That's a line that could have prevented a lot of wars.

Snoopy

There's a passage I got memorized. Ezekiel 25:17.

"The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who, in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of the darkness. For he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know I am the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon you."

I been sayin' that shit for years. And if you ever heard it, it meant your ass. I never really questioned what it meant. I thought it was just a cold-blooded thing to say to a motherfucker 'fore you popped a cap in his ass. But I saw some shit this mornin' made me think twice.

Now I'm thinkin', it could mean you're the evil man. And I'm the righteous man. And Mr. .45 here, he's the shepherd protecting my righteous ass in the valley of darkness. Or it could be you're the righteous man and I'm the shepherd and it's the world that's evil and selfish. I'd like that.

But that shit ain't the truth. The truth is you're the weak. And I'm the tyranny of evil men. But I'm tryin'. I'm tryin' real hard to be a shepherd.

--Jules (Samuel L. Jackson) in Pulp Fiction.

'I ain't got time to bleed'
Jesse Ventura
Predator

"Oh, me sooo horny. Sucky, sucky. Me love you long time."

The Vietnamese whore in "Full Metal Jacket"

Q_C

"Damn the man. Save the empire."

-Empire Records

This one is from one of my favourites and it's easily one of the movies with the most interesting and cool and funny quotes.

"Remember those posters that said, "Today is the first day of the rest of your life?" Well, that's true of every day except one - the day you die. "

- Lester Burnham, in American Beauty


Snoopy

Kariszma83 said:

"Damn the man. Save the empire."

-Empire Records

Click to expand...

I shamefully admit to loving the movie Empire Records.
*hangs head*

[Gus on the phone with a bartender]
Gus: Look, just see if there's a Murray there.
Bartender: [to the patrons] Is there a Murray here?
[Into the phone]
Bartender: I don't think so.
Gus: See if there's a waste of fucking life named Murray, try that.
Bartender: [to the patrons] Is there a fucking waste of life named Murray here?
Murray: Gussy? Yeah that's me.

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Caroline: How can we both be in the marriage and I'm miserable and you're content?
Lloyd: Luck?

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Gus: From now on, the only person who gets to yell is me. Why? Because I have a gun. People with guns get to do whatever they want. Married people without guns - for instance - you - DO NOT get to yell. Why? NO GUNS! No guns, no yelling. See? Simple little equation.

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Lloyd: You know, you and my wife have a lot in common. You both think you have some right to life working out the way you want it to, and when it doesn't, you get to act the way you want. The only trouble with that is someone has to be responsible. I'd love to run around and take classes and play with my inner-self! I'd love the freedom to be some pissed-off criminal with no responsibilities, except I don't have the time! But you don't see me with a gun. And you don't see me sleeping with someone else. You think my life turned out the way I wanted because I live in this house? You think every morning I wake up, look in the mirror and say "Gee I'm glad I'm me and not some 19-year-old billionaire rockstar with the body of an athelete and a 24-hour erection!" No I don't! So just excuse the shit out of me!

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Caroline: I had this dream...
Lloyd: Do we have to do dreams?
Caroline: I'm in this restaurant, and the waiter brings me my entree. It was a salad. It was Lloyd's head on a plate of spinach with his penis sticking out of his ear. And I said, "I didn't order this." And the waiter said, "Oh you must try it, it's a delicacy. But don't eat the penis, it's just garnish."
Dr. Wong: Lloyd, what do you think about the dream?
Lloyd: I think she should stop telling it at dinner parties to all our friends.

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Gus: You know what this family needs? A mute.

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Rose: You're a "Wong"?
Gus: Well, my mother was Irish.
Rose: And your father?
Gus: Wasn't.

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Lloyd: You know what I'm going to get you next Christmas, Mom? A big wooden cross, so that every time you feel unappreciated for your sacrifices, you can climb on up and nail yourself to it.

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Gus: You know what, lady? I'd like to tie you to the back of a fucking truck.
Rose: You don't have the balls.
[Gus leaps up from his chair toward Rose and is intercepted by Lloyd]
Lloyd: Don't do it; it's not worth it.
Gus: I fucking hate her, Lloyd!
Lloyd: I know, I know.
Gus: What is the matter with you? I thought Mothers were sweet and nice a-a-and Patient. Your husband ain't dead, lady. He's hiding.

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Gus: Connecticut is the fifth ring of hell.

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Lloyd: Caroline, the day you see anything through to the end, I'll stick my own dick in my ear.

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Lloyd: I suppose you'll use this drama as a reason to have another affair. I feel sorry for the next delivery man that comes to this house!

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John Chasseur: Mom, the TV's broken. What are we gonna do all night?
Connie Chasseur: Celebrate the birth of Christ!

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Gus: I have a gun, it's loaded, shut up.

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Gus: Sit down Connie.
Connie Chasseur: Excuse me, but I am not one of your patients.
Gus: You're gonna be somebody's patient if you don't get your ass back down in that chair.
John Chasseur: Wow!
Gus: I swear to God, you hit that kid one more time and I will stik that pig's head right up your ass!
Connie Chasseur: Gary, are you gonna let him talk to me like that?
Gary Chasseur: Well, he is a doctor.

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Gus: The Army? What the fuck? What am I, Oswald, here?

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Caroline: You're the one who suffocated him with limitations. Our son's a very sensative, creative...
Lloyd: Juvenile delinquent.
Caroline: ...boy. He has the kind of imagination...
Lloyd: That the mafia gives scholarships for.

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Caroline: He sounded upset.
Gus: He should be. He's going to die a horrible fucking death.

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Murray: Gus?
Gus: What?
Murray: When are we gonna open presents?
Gus: Presents? Is that what you said? Presents? We'll open them when we get there. No, in fact, I'll save you the trouble. Your present is a giant fucking can. And you're gonna crawl in it. Then I'm gonna get 2 pounds of gunpowder and I'm gonna shoot you right out of Jersey! And then I'm gonna drive to Jersey, and pick up all the parts of your body and put them in a plastic bag. Then I'm gonna drive to my house with you in the bag and toss you into the fireplace. I'm gonna get my glass of whiskey and watch the Charlie Brown special with your ashes burning and warming MY HOUSE! AGH!
Murray: Gus?
Gus: What?
Murray: What's that smell?
Gus: Shut up.

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[Lt. Huff smells a mask]
Lt. Huff: It's urine.
Lt. Steve Milford: Oh thank God. Phil thought it might be semen.
Lt. Huff: Phil needs to talk to a therapist.

...The Ref

Jayne

<Princess Leia to Han Solo - Regarding the Falcon>
You came in that thing? You're braver than I thought.

mack_the_knife said:

<Princess Leia to Han Solo - Regarding the Falcon>
You came in that thing? You're braver than I thought.

Click to expand...

And who could forget the awesome classic...

'I love you.' - 'I know.'


Snoopy

Al Czervik: Last time I saw a mouth like that, it had a hook in it.

Al Czervik: [to his Asian companion] I hear this place is restricted, Wang, so don't tell 'em you're Jewish, okay?

Al Czervik: Hey, doll. Could you scare up another round for our table over here? And tell the cook this is low grade dogfood. I've had better food at the ballgame, you know? This steak still has marks from where the jockey was hitting it.

Carl Spackler: So I jump ship in Hong Kong and make my way over to Tibet, and I get on as a looper at a course over in the Himalayas. A looper, you know, a caddy, a looper, a jock. So, I tell them I'm a pro jock, and who do you think they give me? The Dalai Lama, himself. Twelfth son of the Lama. The flowing robes, the grace, bald... striking. So, I'm on the first tee with him. I give him the driver. He hauls off and whacks one---big hitter, the Lama---long, into a ten-thousand foot crevasse, right at the base of this glacier. Do you know what the Lama says? Gunga galunga... gunga, gunga-galunga. So we finish the eighteenth and he's gonna stiff me. And I say, "Hey, Lama, hey, how about a little something, you know, for the effort, you know." And he says, "Oh, uh, there won't be any money, but when you die, on your deathbed, you will receive total consiousness." So I got that goin' for me, which is nice.

From the movie Office Space:


Peter Gibbons: What would you do if you had a million dollars?

Lawrence: I'll tell you what I'd do, man, two chicks at the same time, man.

Peter Gibbons: That's it? If you had a million dollars, you'd do two chicks at the same time?

Lawrence: Damn straight. I always wanted to do that, man. And I think if I had a million dollars I could hook that up, cause chicks dig a dude with money.
Peter Gibbons: Well, not all chicks.

Lawrence: Well the kind of chicks that'd double up on a dude like me do.

Peter Gibbons: Good point.

Lawrence: Well what about you now? what would you do?

Peter Gibbons: Besides two chicks at the same time?