To contract or not to contract

I have a quick question to ask: Is it better to use a more verbal language when writing erotica? So far, I've been consistently using contractions in dialogue, but not in the main body of my story. I worry that this might come across as a bit stiff and formal, but at the same time, I like the contrast it creates between the 'written' and 'spoken' parts of my story.

an example from my current project:

Ellen, on the other hand, felt a strange calmness of mind; she actually was not bothered by it any more. So, she had met Veronica, the woman John had fucked, and while she had gotten angry right away, she now only felt a twinge of attraction towards her instead. Having experienced Veronica’s raw sensuality in person, she had, apparently, decided to let it all go. John really could not be blamed, at least not too much, for his actions

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I suppose it would make for easier reading if I'd used wasn't/she'd/couldn't and so on. In contrast, the dialogue is like this:

“So you were playing with yourself in the sauna? Goodness, I’ve created a monster…”

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“Don’t you want to taste me, Ellen?”

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Would I be better off just going for an all verbal language or not? (I know this of course is a matter of opinion, and I should do whatever I feel is best and so on, but I want to know your opinions; I'm writing this mostly for you.)

MiddleAgedMan said:

I have a quick question to ask: Is it better to use a more verbal language when writing erotica? So far, I've been consistently using contractions in dialogue, but not in the main body of my story. I worry that this might come across as a bit stiff and formal, but at the same time, I like the contrast it creates between the 'written' and 'spoken' parts of my story.

an example from my current project:


I suppose it would make for easier reading if I'd used wasn't/she'd/couldn't and so on. In contrast, the dialogue is like this:



Would I be better off just going for an all verbal language or not? (I know this of course is a matter of opinion, and I should do whatever I feel is best and so on, but I want to know your opinions; I'm writing this mostly for you.)

Click to expand...

My 2 cents: For dialogue, contractions sound more like 'normal' or 'natural' speech. For the narrative I'd keep with the more formal structure, to, as you say, make the distinction between the two more apparent.

I connect contraction usage with the time period of the story. For contemporary time period, I tend to use contractions even in the narrative. For historical time periods, more formal usage is a subtle designation of earlier time.