Humiliation?

LittleAngel72396 said:

I've never really been humiliated before, but it's something I take an interest in. I have a thing for being spanked, scolded, given timeouts like a child. I'm also interested in trying diapers and pacifiers, partially due to me being somewhat of a 'little' and partially because it really sounds like something that would make my face flush bright red. One sort of humiliating fantasy I've had for a while is being a brat on a long car ride and finally who ever is driving pulls over and gives me a spanking, or being spanked in a dressing room at the mall or somewhere else. In the dressing room fantasy, I always imagine having to buy a thong to wear after I've been spanked and having to walk around with my skirt flipped up and tucked in to my waistband so everyone can see my red butt. Oh my god, I'm blushing just thinking about it...

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I would love to humiliate you and try it out and spank you and embarass you too.
I Would like you to also maybe have a wedgie up your butt and walk around with it too. Would you like that? would you use leather and latex as well? does that turn you on honey?

fatbottomgirl78 said:

Humiliation can be a major turn on for some when it's done right. Or can leave a big physiological scar when the wrong button is pressed. I love being harshly humiliated and casting cruel remarks as well. But I/we (me, hubby,friends) typically reserve it for those that we know well enough to know wants hot or simply hurtful. Using humiliation points that are out of someones control my be overly hurtful. Calling a girl that has been struggling with weight issues a fat whore may be bad. Or telling a man his cock is tiny and worthless when he has self-esteem issues about his dick is bad. If you really don't know someone that well tread lighty on the humiliation.

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Using humiliation to face esteem issues has been scary but effective. But it was the person who was using it that made it effective. For me, negative self talk has always derailed my generally happy life. Not smart enough, too fat, not girly enough.

I read so much about D/s where the D wants to hep his girl fly higher, prop her up, reach for the stars, yada yada. But how do you do this? Because you tell her she's pretty? You make her feel cherished and loved?

Maybe... but if I have those voices in my head I've lived with a lot longer and they're stronger than my D's nurturing ways... it's a fail. For me, it worked when I was told over and over and over again that I was fat. I was a pig, I looked disgusting. He'd use the same words I had in my head. It was awful but finally, I realized I wasn't.

At first there were a lot of tears and agreement because I knew I was, but he'd be fucking me or my mouth, he was hard, aroused and he's parroting the exact words I'd use to derail myself.

Finally, rather than agreeing, I'd push back, I'd say no I'm fucking NOT a pig, fuck you! I'm not a fat cow - you're hard because of me... and this little light turned on in my head, I wanted to defend myself. The voices in my head flipped a switch and started saying hey wait up!

I think about the context in which this happened. I knew he loved me. I did feel safe and "cherished." But these moments were crazy intense. At first it felt wrong. Eventually though, when he said only the things I already had in my head and said them over and over and over until I realized how insane the voices made me feel, it was this release of self-loathing. It left a space open for seeing myself in a different way.

In a different context, for sure it would've been devastating. It HAS been devastating. This, however, worked. And it's stuck.

9to5 said:

that sounds so good.it would be so much fun to do that to you.
the mall you might get in trouble. but pull over in a rest stop or just off the road some where. bent over the hood and spanked

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I'd love that

theCARS1979 said:

I would love to humiliate you and try it out and spank you and humiliate you too.
I Would like you to also maybe have a wedgie up your butt and walk around with it too. Would you like that? would you use leather and latex as well? does that turn you on honey?

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Very much so

LittleAngel72396 said:

Very much so

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You seem so fun , interesting and I'd love to also.
I am very turned on too:caning::caning:

amandastagg90 said:

Anyone into humiliation as their primary fetish? Don't get me wrong I love so many things, but nothing puts me over the edge like being degraded and humiliated in the most cruel and mean ways. Am I alone?

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When done well I find it to be an incredible turn on. I totally understand how you feel.

Yep....

Someone mentioned to me other day and would love to try.....go round his and log on to a website and have a woman tell us what to do to each other,whilst she/they laughing as they watch.
Weird I know,but is turning me on thinking about it.x

half of the humiliation is verbalizing your desires to your partner. the other half is when they realize that these activities turn you on. and it does turn you on. how do you confess to your lover your deepest fantasies? how do you tell her that once in awhile you want to fuck her while wearing her panties? I did tell her that I’d like her to spank me sometime (reversing our usual roles). you always wonder if they’re going to think less of you. (but it still turns you on).

obviously I have strap-on fantasies, but I’ve never done that. we need to work our way up to that. I told her that my long ago ex-wife would dominant me, but I don’t think I revealed the details.

cascadiabound said:

Take me to dinner tonight?
You can choose my dress TC.

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I kind of like the one you have on in your av.

I can guarantee you that you're not alone in the humiliation category. it doesn't matter if I'm giving, receiving, or just watching, it's definitely an instant turn on for me!

amandastagg90 said:

Anyone into humiliation as their primary fetish? Don't get me wrong I love so many things, but nothing puts me over the edge like being degraded and humiliated in the most cruel and mean ways. Am I alone?

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I am actually a big fan of humiliation.

The humiliation and degradation I feel and enjoy is in my own mind whenever I'm on my knees, sucking and slobbering the cocks of the friends of my main feeder. The men that I blow couldn't care less about how I feel, one way or the other. To them, my throat is just a wet, warm and tight hole for them to fuck and a convenient receptacle for their cum. It's deliciously humiliating to admit to myself that I love sucking cock and simply "being" a "Cocksucker" so much!!!

CutieMouse said:

I dislike the word "humiliation"; I prefer the word "humbled". For myself, it's an issue of dichotomies (common theme in my sexuality, actually).

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I really love this take! Another word that comes to mind is "exposed"...with the exposure being that inner hidden truth we are afraid to show. All three words; humiliation, humbled, exposed carry connotations of "shame".

It also seems that such "shame" often revolves around some desire we hold within which is not sanctioned by "society". An example might be of being "fagged"...made to perform "degrading" homosexual acts while being ridiculed. Now, obviously there is no real shame in a guy giving a blowjob. But, depending on the "societal norm" he had been indoctrinated into in the course of life, such an act might have subliminal residual shame. But, the rejection of that societal shame is very, very arousing and freeing...and D/s can be that rejection. Now taking the same scenario and playing it out with a person born and raised under different societal norms where being gay is programmed in as normal and perfectly acceptable...and it would all seem rather anti-climatic...and so on and so on with us all and our hidden "shame" whatever the flavor.

(I'm confident that this theory doesn't touch on all of the variations that D/s "humiliation" can take...so this is just a thought not meant to be a complete answer...in other words; be nice

IMHO, humiliation is about controlled release of shame... and pushing a person's inadequacy buttons. I think it goes into having emotions bottled up is bad for the psyche, so controlled release under certain play acting makes certain people happy.

KayceeCharles said:

IMHO, humiliation is about controlled release of shame... and pushing a person's inadequacy buttons. I think it goes into having emotions bottled up is bad for the psyche, so controlled release under certain play acting makes certain people happy.

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That's a really good take; "...controlled release..." For if anything, true and intelligent D/s is all about the D's "control over their own behavior" while the sub faces a "controlled surrender" of everyday resistance to control by others. Properly done, this affords both a release of desires often frowned on by "normal" society. As is often mentioned, the D must put in the more work to make this all a success. One reason for this is the need to control their own behavior. If the D is naturally wired for domination the need for self restraint might be required...if the D is more wired to a less dominant nature, then the need for some forced domination might be required...all of this takes a lot of effort. I suppose that if too much "effort" is required by either side, then the relationship is unfulfilling and probably not well matched for D/s.

sterculius said:

The humiliation and degradation I feel and enjoy is in my own mind...It's deliciously humiliating to admit to myself that I love sucking cock and simply "being" a "Cocksucker" so much!!!

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Like Sterculius, the delicious pleasure of humiliation that I cherish and desire so much is really in my own mind and can be brought to life by many things...the words of a lover, my own words or even the self-degrading graffiti I write on a public men's restroom wall!

I thrill at saying out loud, "I love to suck cock!" or, "I wish I could be on my knees sucking off a stranger in an ABS right now!" And, having another person call me a cocksucker or a faggot or a cumslut is simply mind-blowing! But then, just the plain FACT that I actually LOVE performing sex acts that many people find disgusting or degrading is a tangible thrill to me!

But, what probably best describes the hunger I feel for sexual humiliation, is my love of writing homosexual graffiti in public places! It's hard to describe the hot and lasting pleasure I feel when I write, "LOVE TO SUCK SOME HOT, WET COCK!" on a public men's restroom wall, or spray paint, "I SUCK COCK!" on an isolated bridge abutment or roadside rock outcrop! It's just so deliciously permanent and so public! And just my way of trying to come out to the world I guess! But the pleasure is incredible!

I simply love that my sexual preferences themselves, make me feel so wonderfully humiliated as I have ever been!

Tallcajun said:

I kind of like the one you have on in your av.

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Yeah? Glad you approve TC. Mr. T liked that one too.

Decided to change into something to go dancing in. lol

yukonnights said:

That's a really good take; "...controlled release..." For if anything, true and intelligent D/s is all about the D's "control over their own behavior" while the sub faces a "controlled surrender" of everyday resistance to control by others. Properly done, this affords both a release of desires often frowned on by "normal" society. As is often mentioned, the D must put in the more work to make this all a success. One reason for this is the need to control their own behavior. If the D is naturally wired for domination the need for self restraint might be required...if the D is more wired to a less dominant nature, then the need for some forced domination might be required...all of this takes a lot of effort. I suppose that if too much "effort" is required by either side, then the relationship is unfulfilling and probably not well matched for D/s.

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YN -
This is rather insightful. Both the idea of controlled release, controlled surrender in combination with cutie mouse's comment about being "humbled" not "humiliated." I find that the power play of being controlled, having to surrender is very powerful for me and while I guess one could call that "humiliation" - if I were actually humiliated - in a way that hurt me, made me feel less than, I would HATE it and it would be a total turn off. So I think it is that edge... the way in which I am not in control when, in dominating me I allow him to guide me, to keep me safe as he asks me to do something on the edge of my comfort that he knows will twist me up inside, will arouse me no end. And I am doing it for him... for us.. because he knows it gets me off and because that means I will be ready for him... to please him, to be his toy... to be available for his pleasure.

thank you

sarahkatiebabe said:

This a million times.

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wow I like that : )

KayceeCharles said:

IMHO, humiliation is about controlled release of shame... and pushing a person's inadequacy buttons. I think it goes into having emotions bottled up is bad for the psyche, so controlled release under certain play acting makes certain people happy.

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yes it also makes you learn respect , like taking an over the knee spanking or being fucked in the ass by a girl with a strap on

GloriHoleLover said:

Like Sterculius, the delicious pleasure of humiliation that I cherish and desire so much is really in my own mind and can be brought to life by many things...the words of a lover, my own words or even the self-degrading graffiti I write on a public men's restroom wall!

But, what probably best describes the hunger I feel for sexual humiliation, is my love of writing homosexual graffiti in public places! It's hard to describe the hot and lasting pleasure I feel when I write, "LOVE TO SUCK SOME HOT, WET COCK!" on a public men's restroom wall, or spray paint, "I SUCK COCK!" on an isolated bridge abutment or roadside rock outcrop! It's just so deliciously permanent and so public! And just my way of trying to come out to the world I guess! But the pleasure is incredible! !

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I totally understand these feelings you have and can relate (personally) as I have felt similar. Forced bi, for me, isn't so much about some repressed homosexual or bi-sexual urges, but the urge to surrender to a more powerful and superior woman whose grace, beauty and power over me is such that she can force me to do things that are against the core of my very sexual nature.

But what I do NOT understand, nor approve of, is vandalism of public places. Sorry, but you lost me there. Expressing yourself by defacing public spaces is not okay, much like being paraded naked in public on a leash and collar, in front of families and children, is not okay either.

PaxNurgle said:

But what I do NOT understand, nor approve of, is vandalism of public places. Sorry, but you lost me there. Expressing yourself by defacing public spaces is not okay, much like being paraded naked in public on a leash and collar, in front of families and children, is not okay either.

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Please allow me to respond to the above thought.

First...I see my lifelong fetish for writing cocksucking graffiti as little different than most other fetishes, being very difficult to explain to those who don't share that particular fetish. Also, it's been my experience that MANY other men share my fetish for sexual graffiti, as evinced by the many other examples I find already gracing the places that I choose to write in...from public restrooms, to bridge abutments. I'm rarely the first "grafittist" in any venue!

Second...I'm very careful (in my most frequent graffiti venues - public men's restrooms and adult bookstore video booths) to not PERMANENTLY deface property by using either a thick, soft pencil, or a non-permanent, waxy, "china marker" crayon, BOTH easily removed with the cleaning solutions commonly used to clean these surfaces. I very scrupulously NEVER use permanent markers such as Sharpie pens or Magic Markers! If I do use a felt tip marker, I use ONLY the Flare pens, which are water-soluble and wash off easily. Also, the surfaces themselves are DESIGNED to be easily cleaned of graffiti, usually being constructed using Formica-type laminates, melamine panels or even textured stainless steel! I guess you could say I'm a socially responsible grafittist!

Bottom line...it really turns me on knowing that other men see and read my stuff...knowing WHAT I am, without actually knowing who I am...and that, hopefully, I'll have gotten them aroused by what I've written, perhaps encouraging them to masturbate or even to consider homosexual sex. (Generally speaking, if I'm writing in a public restroom, I keep my inscriptions at an "adult height." But, most of my graffiti today is written in "adults only" locations...usually in adult bookstores and theaters.)

Hope this explanation helps you understand me a bit better, Pax. And thanks for bearing with me.

Glori.

I enjoy verbally humiliating women and occasionally men in public.

It could involve them verbally humiliating themselves. They would have to say things to strangers or friends of mine or even people they knew.

Cor.....

All get bit heavy.
I love humiliation... So many things... I was on packed tube once standing in front of lady sitting down,she could see my pink panties peeping out of top of jeans as I reached up to hold on.
When younger,being made to wear short red polka dress,knickers,and made to cum in them.x