You Know You're Sexually Frustrated When ....

Lia Monde

Life is good
Joined
Jan 28, 2005
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Re-animating an old thread:

You Know You're Sexually Frustrated When...


Even your hand won't be your fuck buddy.

When looking at fashion magazines, you're fantasizing more about sex with the models than about the clothes.

You realize Sesame Street muppet Oscar the Grouch is getting more sex than you.

You think the trash collector looks more like Brad Pitt every day.
 
You get turned on piercing the seal on a jar of coffee.
 
If it wasn't for pick-pockets, you'd have no sex life at all
 
When Pandas take the piss out of your sexual abilities
 
When you see strangers kissing and consider asking them if you can join.
 
When you give Barbie and Ken a dirty look cause you know they are getting more 'play time' than you.
 
When the slightest breeze picks up and you feel it through your body...

Wait no... my fly's down. Sorry everyone.
 
When you start to lick the rim of your beer bottle while day dreaming, look down and huff.
 
When the weather girl in the short skirt on TV causes you to start stroking. :)
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Sexually frustrated? Sorry -- retired the title long ago. No nookie for so long -- I have decided that the most apropos opportunity for me is to become a man-whore for 70-year olds. There's a retirement community just a short distance away and - well -- there's also one neighbor who seems to be a bit on the randy side herself -- or maybe it's a little dementia settling in. Tough to tell but HEY - if she's game -- it's game on. :D
 
When a discussion about granny panties makes your heart race a bit....
 
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