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Age play

lilturtle said:
Why is this a touchy subject? There are incest stories for petesakes! I ageplay. To my partner and I it works. It makes me feel safe and loved. It creates a special bond.

Any other age players out there? What is your take?
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I have no experience with age play. I wonder if it's a "touchy subject" for some because they just don't have enough information.

It's a "touchy subject" for me because I cannot wrap my head around it right off and I've not wished to learn more so far. I already have a mother and father, and they're assholes! Why would I want more parents? I am too round to ever resemble a child, either.

I do not understand the motivation or the goal. It confuses me. I wouldn't condemn others who are into it just because I don't get it, though.
 
So much good discussion. Thank you!

I have a Daddy. I had a father (he passed away last year) that I loved very much. My Daddy is NOT my father. I'm not his daughter either (we aren't into incest play). I am his little one or baby bear. It's very sweet, innocent and tender. He isn't into actual kids anymore then I am a kid into adults.

I wish I were shorter. I'm 5'10" but my Daddy makes me feel smaller. It's a fantasy. We started out as D/s but DD/lg works so much better for us.
 
Stella_Omega said:
It's possible that the two things might be mutually exclusive-- think about it. a true pedo wouldn't want to play. It wouldn't satisfy them!

Of course it's possible that someone has learned to sublimate their pedophile leanings by playing with consenting adults instead, but that strikes me as a very good thing.
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It could be a good thing, true. But it could also egg the person on, make the urges more intense until mere roleplay isn't enough. Again, I can't reiterate enough that I don't think this is the case with most age players, but I'm sure it happens occasionally. The thought of that is distasteful to me in the extreme.

I understand your desire to explain the way in which the common populace misunderstands things, but as someone who could totally get into molesting a blithely innocent "child" of 24 or 40 actual years-- giving her my special pacifier to suck on-- I would say that I'm one of the people she asked about in the first place. :p

fuck that sounds hot
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That's cool you're one of the people she asked about, but I only desire to give my opinion because the OP asked. I answered, that's all. :)
 
Pachet said:
It could be a good thing, true. But it could also egg the person on, make the urges more intense until mere roleplay isn't enough. Again, I can't reiterate enough that I don't think this is the case with most age players, but I'm sure it happens occasionally. The thought of that is distasteful to me in the extreme.
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Yes it could happen. Or not. Mostl likely, as you say, not.

And if the idea that it could happen squicks you out till you react as if it always happens-- which seems to be the case here despite your reiterations, because it's the only thing you've talked about -- well, that's a hella lotta squick, I guess.

look, "when the roleplay isn't enough" has pretty much zero to do with the roleplay. It has something to do with someone's borderline personality disorder. It's equally possible-- which is to say not very-- that a baseball picther would rather throw rocks, or a rock drummer would rather beat someone brainless with a club* and therefore you can't enjoy baseball or bands...

* I wouldn't put it past most of them, to be truthful -- drummers hit things :D
 
Stella_Omega said:
"That man says he wants to marry his male partner-- suppose he actually wants to marry his dog, huh?"

There's a name for that logical fallacy but I can't be arsed to hunt it down ATM.
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My Daddy said the logical fallacy is a Slippery Slope Argument. He's so smart.
 
midwestyankee said:
I'm not sure what everyone is all gassed up about. My partner and I engage in age play almost every weekend. She pretends to be in her early forties and I pretend to have the energy to chase her around the house all weekend long.
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That's so lovely ! I'm grinning madly....Good for both of you.
 
lilturtle said:
My Daddy said the logical fallacy is a Slippery Slope Argument. He's so smart.
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Well done Daddy.

I was chatting to my Daddy about this, and my theory is that if a guy really was scum enough to want to defile young girls, would he really bother with having a grown and willing woman pretend to be one ?

Whatever we make believe we still have the mind and body of a woman not a child.
 
BiBunny said:
There's no way to say this that's not going to sound like I'm defending pedophiles, but whatever.

So what if there are? "Pedophile" and "child molester" aren't necessarily synonyms.
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I was friends with a pedophile for a number of years, and while he definitely isn't all pedophiles, he knew that there was a marked difference between a woman play-acting the part and an actual child, much to his inner torment. He never made mention of trying to bring age play into his relationships. He was, quite possibly, too scared to.
 
KoPilot said:
I was friends with a pedophile for a number of years, and while he definitely isn't all pedophiles, he knew that there was a marked difference between a woman play-acting the part and an actual child, much to his inner torment. He never made mention of trying to bring age play into his relationships. He was, quite possibly, too scared to.
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Child molesters can go die in a fire, but I do have sympathy for pedophiles who never act on their urges. That must be a hell of a burden to live with. :(
 
midwestyankee said:
I'm not sure what everyone is all gassed up about. My partner and I engage in age play almost every weekend. She pretends to be in her early forties and I pretend to have the energy to chase her around the house all weekend long.
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lol!! goodness gracious, i honestly laughed out loud when i read that!!! bravo, sir!
 
Redrosewitch said:
Well done Daddy.

I was chatting to my Daddy about this, and my theory is that if a guy really was scum enough to want to defile young girls, would he really bother with having a grown and willing woman pretend to be one ?

Whatever we make believe we still have the mind and body of a woman not a child.
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I would have to agree with your two points. I doubt age play would work for child molestors.
 
Just a random thought I had...

Is it a physical / mental thing?

Age players might not be attracted to the bodies of children, but enjoy playing with the mentality of a young / small person (there's a difference between young and small for me)

One of my personalities enjoys DD/lg play. It's a separate relationship to the D/s one I had with the same person. Sometimes they'd overlap in the physical, but not in my head. Although occasionally I'd find myself slipping roles from one to the other for no apparent reason.

It's not something I've had to worry about analysing much, cos as the little in the relationship, I've never had to worry about why I wanted to fuck someone pretending to be a teenager. I might get in trouble for this but my little personality is about 15 - 16, with some very young child traits like sticking my tongue out behind Daddy's back. Clearly underage for this board. But hey honesty and all that. It hasn't been my moral burden to bear.

I really would like to hear from the 'Big' perspective on this. How does it work for you? Is it channeling a desire for underage into roleplay? Is it something else entirely? Is it a young thing or a small thing? Any and all attempts to explain it to my dumb ass are welcome.

If it's not something you're comfortable discussing here, then I'm open to taking this to PM's.

And thank you.
 
It's a "small" thing for me, but I don't think I can call it age play. Idk, the both of us seem to regress into childish mindsets when we're totally at ease together, but maybe all couples do that?
 
At the risk of too much information for you folks...

I engage in ageplay online with men where I pretent to be quite young, and I prefer the guy to act as a father or close male relative. It is not something I'm at all comfortable with and afterward I feel quite ashamed. I'm not sure why. I'm not at all interested in a fantasy where there is anyone else underage and I will not comply with that if the guy suggests it, it would totally turn me off. Nor will I engage in any discussion concerning actual young people that the guy might know. But if it's me in a fantasy I can't deny that it turns me on. And if the guy is somewhat rough and abusive all the better.

I recently spoke to a therapist and admitted that I had been molested when I was young by my babysitter. The therapist, predictably, made a connnection between that experience and the fact that I like to play the same age I was when that happened. She ignored the fact that my real life molester was a girl and I play with men. I'm not suggesting there is no connection, or saying there is, I just brought it up for people to make of it what they will.

Personally I wrestle with whether there is anything morally wrong with what I do or ageplay in general. One of the things that really bothers me is what if the guy I'm chatting to is really into it and I'm encouraging him? Or even if I'm not encouraging him I'm still getting off with a sicko. Or is it just a fantasy for him like it is with me? And even if that's all it is is that ok?

I really don't know.

I would appreciate some feedback actually, if anyone is comfortable discussing it.

I really hope I haven't opened up too much or crossed a line and put people off. I'd hate to kill the thread or get it locked as I feel it's an important subject to discuss. If I have someone let me know and I'll delete it.

Thank you all.
 
Bump, bump, bump.

I wish I had something insightful to share, but I don't know enough about ageplay to have much to offer. On the topic of shame relating to your sexual desires, I understand that feeling and am still working on it. Having been raised in a woman centric family and having attended a women's college which promoted a fairly radical feminist ideology, I still struggle with shame. Many of the activities that in which I indulge or have an interest are antithetical to the values which were instilled in me. So shame, oh yeah.

I think there are people here who are much further along in their personal journey who may be able to offer insight and perspective.
 
I haven't exactly actively engaged in any form of age play but I've noticed a process where it has come into play. When I'm being dominated it seems like I sometimes get smaller. The power exchange makes me little and the one with the power big. Submitting and making myself vulnerable, naked, letting the guard down, being stripped of some of those defenses...

It's like it triggers a little girl's type responses in me. My voice gets smaller, I get more emotional and immediate. The vulnerability makes me feel a little more little I guess. When guys I've played with have picked up on this it seems to have triggered something in them. Being teased for it and called a little girl and so on makes me embarrassed and shy and maybe even smaller. They have also wanted to take care of me more. I feel less in control and it all feeds into it all.

I suppose it's a subtle form of humiliation. I can't really explain it well right now.
Hmm...
 
rinka said:
I haven't exactly actively engaged in any form of age play but I've noticed a process where it has come into play. When I'm being dominated it seems like I sometimes get smaller. The power exchange makes me little and the one with the power big. Submitting and making myself vulnerable, naked, letting the guard down, being stripped of some of those defenses...

It's like it triggers a little girl's type responses in me. My voice gets smaller, I get more emotional and immediate. The vulnerability makes me feel a little more little I guess. When guys I've played with have picked up on this it seems to have triggered something in them. Being teased for it and called a little girl and so on makes me embarrassed and shy and maybe even smaller. They have also wanted to take care of me more. I feel less in control and it all feeds into it all.

I suppose it's a subtle form of humiliation. I can't really explain it well right now.
Hmm...
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I know exactly the feeling, and I love it.

But I'm a macrophile, not an age player. Sometimes feeling "youthful" goes hand in hand with feeling small, but I think that also has a lot to do with the way feeling small is also affirming of my gender identity-- that is, I have none. Feeling small makes me feel genderless in the same way that a pillbug is a non-gendered thing to a human. But the feeling of being genderless is also related to childishness too. It's a bunch of complex stuff.

I think it's also a form of xenomelia that gets reaffirmed in those moments for me too, but that's really a different subject.
 
Part of me really wants to share in this thread, but part of me really isn't sure if I can. I'll have to think on it. :rose:
 
gagginforit said:
At the risk of too much information for you folks...

I engage in ageplay online with men where I pretent to be quite young, and I prefer the guy to act as a father or close male relative. It is not something I'm at all comfortable with and afterward I feel quite ashamed. I'm not sure why. I'm not at all interested in a fantasy where there is anyone else underage and I will not comply with that if the guy suggests it, it would totally turn me off. Nor will I engage in any discussion concerning actual young people that the guy might know. But if it's me in a fantasy I can't deny that it turns me on. And if the guy is somewhat rough and abusive all the better.

I recently spoke to a therapist and admitted that I had been molested when I was young by my babysitter. The therapist, predictably, made a connnection between that experience and the fact that I like to play the same age I was when that happened. She ignored the fact that my real life molester was a girl and I play with men. I'm not suggesting there is no connection, or saying there is, I just brought it up for people to make of it what they will.

Personally I wrestle with whether there is anything morally wrong with what I do or ageplay in general. One of the things that really bothers me is what if the guy I'm chatting to is really into it and I'm encouraging him? Or even if I'm not encouraging him I'm still getting off with a sicko. Or is it just a fantasy for him like it is with me? And even if that's all it is is that ok?

I really don't know.

I would appreciate some feedback actually, if anyone is comfortable discussing it.

I really hope I haven't opened up too much or crossed a line and put people off. I'd hate to kill the thread or get it locked as I feel it's an important subject to discuss. If I have someone let me know and I'll delete it.

Thank you all.
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Do you take the time to get to know your partner before playing? Or are you just playing with random guys online? I'm only comfortable being little with one person. I know him well and it is not creepy or disturbing at all. I know he isn't into real kids or anything bad. I don't feel any shame because I know him. It feels natural. If you aren't taking t he time to get to know the person he could be one sick and twisted person you are playing with.

Stay safe!
 
I think consenting adults can enjoy any kind of fantasy they like long as they're not hurting each other. Most fantasies depart from reality in a number of ways and there are those who enjoy all variety of fantasies that aren't mainstream.

There imaginative fantasy play doesn't stop them from being good and responsible citizens. I recall that case in Pittsburgh where that creep had three women as sex slaves chained up in his basement. Nobody was saying that guy's warped fantasy world was an alternative lifestyle. Does it make you a child molester to be if you like when your partner dresses like a school boy or you have your submissive call you mommy.

Fantasies should never be blurred though, because the rules and principals for our reality are in place for good reasons.
 
lilturtle said:
Do you take the time to get to know your partner before playing? Or are you just playing with random guys online? I'm only comfortable being little with one person. I know him well and it is not creepy or disturbing at all. I know he isn't into real kids or anything bad. I don't feel any shame because I know him. It feels natural. If you aren't taking t he time to get to know the person he could be one sick and twisted person you are playing with.

Stay safe!
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Yeah I know exactly what you mean.
 
Something pretty surreal happened to me today. I'm trying to get the counselling I mentioned paid for by the government so I took the application to my doctor for him to fill it in (he has to state that I need it).

When I told him there was sexual abuse in my past and I wanted therapy he said I should just bury it. That lots of people go through horrible things and you just have to put it behind you and move forward. Therapy will only dredge up bad memories and open up wounds. Then he started going on about the cyclone victims in the Philippines and that it's tragic and bad things happen. Then he went on to tell me he had been sexually fiddled with when he was little and his attitude is to put it behind him and go on with his life.

This all made me rather uncomfortable but do you think he has a point? Is it better to not open old wounds? What if what happened to me is a contributing factor to my erectile dysfunction? If it can be cured isn't it worth exploring?

Thoughts?
 
gagginforit said:
Something pretty surreal happened to me today. I'm trying to get the counselling I mentioned paid for by the government so I took the application to my doctor for him to fill it in (he has to state that I need it).

When I told him there was sexual abuse in my past and I wanted therapy he said I should just bury it. That lots of people go through horrible things and you just have to put it behind you and move forward. Therapy will only dredge up bad memories and open up wounds. Then he started going on about the cyclone victims in the Philippines and that it's tragic and bad things happen. Then he went on to tell me he had been sexually fiddled with when he was little and his attitude is to put it behind him and go on with his life.

This all made me rather uncomfortable but do you think he has a point? Is it better to not open old wounds? What if what happened to me is a contributing factor to my erectile dysfunction? If it can be cured isn't it worth exploring?

Thoughts?
Click to expand...
I think he has absolutely no right to make that judgement. And he has no right to tell, for instance, someone who comes in with a hurting arm-- could be a break, could be a sprain-- that they should suck it up because the Phillipines.

If he cares so much he should get his ass on a plane and go be a doctor in the field That would actually do the Phillipines some good-- him fake-moralising at you doesn't help them.
 
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