K
KinkyChefGaia
Guest
Hello! I published a true story this month on my other profile, and as I was re-reading it the other day I realized I had mis-conveyed a key part (my favorite part)!
I've edited it, hoping to more accurately convey how the moment felt for me, but without dampening the intensity for the reader.
My question: is anyone interested in reading the original posted version of the scene and the edit? If so, would you mind giving me your opinion regarding the changes made, as well as your idea of what the experience felt like, to make sure I'm getting it right this time. The passage is about 560 words.
The scene is about being choked the first time I met my first Dom, and it was written in a way that I believe paints him as inexperienced or out-of-control, which he wasn't. The memory is highly erotic for me, and I revisit it fondly.
If you're down to help please respond to this thread or PM me
I've edited it, hoping to more accurately convey how the moment felt for me, but without dampening the intensity for the reader.
My question: is anyone interested in reading the original posted version of the scene and the edit? If so, would you mind giving me your opinion regarding the changes made, as well as your idea of what the experience felt like, to make sure I'm getting it right this time. The passage is about 560 words.
The scene is about being choked the first time I met my first Dom, and it was written in a way that I believe paints him as inexperienced or out-of-control, which he wasn't. The memory is highly erotic for me, and I revisit it fondly.
If you're down to help please respond to this thread or PM me
Last edited by a moderator:
