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11-02-2009, 07:03 AM
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#1
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On Strike!
Frisco_Slug_Esq is offline
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 18,057
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Humps and Holes
Is this not a perfect thread title for a place like Lit?
Sexual innuendo? A play on words?
Really it's about my yard in the think forest. It's full of mole runs, hence humps. I have dachshunds, hence holes. Every hump has to have a hole and they don't seem to care it it's the end of the hump or the front of the hump...
Where there is a hump, there is a hole.
It's the Hole'Oweiner nature of my yard, a scary place to walk through...
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11-02-2009, 07:05 AM
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#2
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what's new, fuck bubble?
rosco rathbone is offline
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: Ravenswood Houses, Queens
Posts: 29,027
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Hump-A-Mole
__________________
What words for what then? None for what then. No words for what when words gone. For what when nohow on. Somehow nohow on. Samuel Beckett Worstward Ho
There is yet one man by whom we may enquire of the LORD; but I hate him; for he never prophesied good unto me; but always evil.
-2 Chron. 18-7
a suckubus collects semen from sleeping men
"I'm a CERTIFIED LATE NIGHT TECHNICIAN AT DOING ALL KINDS OF MAJOR AND MINOR WORK, VALVES BEING ADJUSTED AND TORQUING DOWN YOUR ROCKERS TO GET YOUR PISTON & RODS STROKING LIKE A BIG BLOCK 426 HEMI MOTOR!!!"-Big Busty Vanessa
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11-02-2009, 07:06 AM
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#3
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On Strike!
Frisco_Slug_Esq is offline
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 18,057
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Very good!
You Hot Dog!
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11-02-2009, 07:09 AM
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#4
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dynamic
SaintPeter is offline
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Denver
Posts: 38,766
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Fill each holes with a wiener dog.
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11-02-2009, 07:20 AM
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#5
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On Strike!
Frisco_Slug_Esq is offline
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 18,057
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Why do hot dog buns come eight to a pack when hot dogs come ten to a pack?
Answer this question and i will answer yours...
(Bulletproof Monk)
__________________
I invented i, the square root of neutral 1.
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11-02-2009, 07:24 AM
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#6
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dynamic
SaintPeter is offline
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Denver
Posts: 38,766
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Frisco_Slug_Esq
Why do hot dog buns come eight to a pack when hot dogs come ten to a pack?
Answer this question and i will answer yours...
(Bulletproof Monk)
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We have more lips and assholes than flour?  |
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11-02-2009, 07:25 AM
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#7
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On Strike!
Frisco_Slug_Esq is offline
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 18,057
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No, now offer a weary traveler some quiet conversation and a bowl of cocoa puffs...
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11-02-2009, 07:25 AM
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#8
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Looking for my Valentine
Cikali is offline
Join Date: Jul 2009
Posts: 1,943
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I like dogs.(The rest is foreign as usual).  |
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11-02-2009, 07:26 AM
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#9
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On Strike!
Frisco_Slug_Esq is offline
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 18,057
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Well, thick forest is a metaphor for pubic hairs...
Dachshund is well, don't you people all speak German?  |
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11-02-2009, 09:20 AM
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#10
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Mrs. Smarty Pantsless
Cheyenne is offline
Join Date: Apr 2000
Location: Midwest
Posts: 57,104
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So do your dogs ever actually catch the moles?
__________________
Republican born,
Republican bred.
And when I die,
I'll be Republican dead.
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11-02-2009, 09:49 AM
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#11
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it's cold. wear clothes.
chipbutty is offline
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: where I can breathe
Posts: 12,868
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Frisco_Slug_Esq
Why do hot dog buns come eight to a pack when hot dogs come ten to a pack?
Answer this question and i will answer yours...
(Bulletproof Monk)
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it'll cost ya
meataphorically, the extra two are for no-bun fun
__________________
who can tell me the shape of madness?
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11-02-2009, 09:56 AM
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#12
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Mother Earth Seduced
Image is offline
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Crossroads
Posts: 39,593
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Rid your yard of grubs and no more moles.
Rid your yard of dachsies and no more holes.
Simple math |
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11-02-2009, 10:42 AM
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#13
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Literotica Guru
carrie-on is offline
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: Upper Michigan~Right smack dab in the middle of God's Country
Posts: 6,971
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I have dachsunds also, one is a digging machine, the other lays there and watches her dig, then rolls in the dirt she spread around.
__________________
Writing is a socially acceptable form of schizophrenia
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Carrie
Carrie's Stories
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11-03-2009, 07:08 AM
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#14
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On Strike!
Frisco_Slug_Esq is offline
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 18,057
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Cheyenne
So do your dogs ever actually catch the moles?
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Yes, and then they chew them up and roll on them until they stink to high heaven and have to be bathed.
They're dachshunds! Although, the holes can get pretty damned deep... |
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11-03-2009, 07:09 AM
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#15
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On Strike!
Frisco_Slug_Esq is offline
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 18,057
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Image
Rid your yard of grubs and no more moles.
Rid your yard of dachsies and no more holes.
Simple math |
Did you miss the part where I live in the forest?
You don't just "get rid" of anything.
Stop mowing for two weeks and you "get rid" of our yard though...
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11-03-2009, 07:11 AM
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#16
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On Strike!
Frisco_Slug_Esq is offline
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 18,057
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Quote:
Originally Posted by chipbutty
it'll cost ya
meataphorically, the extra two are for no-bun fun
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Sorry, you need more time at the Golden Palace.
Tonight's feature is Jackey Chan's "Snakefist verses the Dragon" dubbed in Spanish... |
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11-03-2009, 07:12 AM
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#17
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On Strike!
Frisco_Slug_Esq is offline
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 18,057
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Quote:
Originally Posted by carrie-on
I have dachsunds also, one is a digging machine, the other lays there and watches her dig, then rolls in the dirt she spread around.
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They both dig!
The mini even digs under blankets to sleep at night. She prefers to be a house dog...
__________________
I invented i, the square root of neutral 1.
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11-06-2009, 05:01 PM
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#18
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Mrs. Smarty Pantsless
Cheyenne is offline
Join Date: Apr 2000
Location: Midwest
Posts: 57,104
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Frisco_Slug_Esq
Yes, and then they chew them up and roll on them until they stink to high heaven and have to be bathed.
They're dachshunds! Although, the holes can get pretty damned deep... |
Bleech!
__________________
Republican born,
Republican bred.
And when I die,
I'll be Republican dead.
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11-06-2009, 05:03 PM
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#19
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On Strike!
Frisco_Slug_Esq is offline
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 18,057
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I can see them digging now.
At least they're not in the yard for a change...
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11-06-2009, 05:07 PM
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#20
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dynamic
SaintPeter is offline
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Denver
Posts: 38,766
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We still have more lips and assholes than flour here.
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11-06-2009, 05:09 PM
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#21
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On Strike!
Frisco_Slug_Esq is offline
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 18,057
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SaintPeter
We still have more lips and assholes than flour here.
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Are you here all day?
Do you like your weiners? |
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11-06-2009, 05:15 PM
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#22
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dynamic
SaintPeter is offline
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Denver
Posts: 38,766
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Frisco_Slug_Esq
Are you here all day? |
Just look at my post per day ratio and you will see how balanced I am.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Frisco_Slug_Esq
Do you like your weiners?
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I like Hebrew Nationals if I must. More of a burger kind of guy. Nothing wrong with a good dog.
Weiner dogs are cool. There is one in my family. Ricky's breath would stop a train so he stays on the floor whenever he comes to visit. |
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11-06-2009, 05:20 PM
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#23
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On Strike!
Frisco_Slug_Esq is offline
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 18,057
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They have trouble not staying on the floor, especially the mini...
I eat the turkey franks. No lips...
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11-06-2009, 05:21 PM
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#24
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dynamic
SaintPeter is offline
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Denver
Posts: 38,766
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Frisco_Slug_Esq
They have trouble not staying on the floor, especially the mini...
I eat the turkey franks. No lips...
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So you are more of a pecker kind of guy? |
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11-06-2009, 05:26 PM
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#25
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On Strike!
Frisco_Slug_Esq is offline
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 18,057
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More of a smootcher...
Less lip, more tail!
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