I beg your help to polish my writing skill.

[BrianCaster]

Dear writers,

I love to write, but problem is that my language is really unbearable, completely dirty and torturous. I think that’s why my submissions are viewed by many people and voted by none. one particular writing doesn’t open its vote’s section, though it was viewed by many.

I can’t figure out, what’s the problem in my writing and how can I remove it? Many reviewed it as a “badly written” but don’t put any remedy.

So I beg you to help me in my problem. I want answer from all whoever read this. Please help me. I can’t live without writing. It’s my passion. My given below submission links will help you. I am really grateful to you for your help.



A Spicy Hochpoch of Indian Flavor
http://www.literotica.com/stories/sh....php?id=440510

First Time Fucking with Big Cock

http://www.literotica.com/stories/sh....php?id=441094


My Fake Friend
http://www.literotica.com/stories/sh....php?id=441844

The Bushy Whore With Huge Libido
http://www.literotica.com/stories/sh....php?id=439795

When I Broke My Chastity
http://www.literotica.com/stories/sh....php?id=436596

[Dragonlipz]

It's obvious that you like to write, but perhaps you should read some more fiction, well done fiction in English - it's also obvious that English is not your first language. That alone makes it very difficult to write prose. I'm only fluent in one other language, Espanol, and I would not even attempt to write prose in that tongue.
My other advice is to speak conversationally with native English speakers to absorb some of the nuances of the language...That would help you with the rhythms used..
Of course as the character Henry Higgins observes in the musical "My Fair Lady" (during the song 'Why don't the English speak English anymore?') "In America they haven't spoken it for years!"

[jomar]

Hello...

It looks as though English is not your native language because some of the writing doesn't flow smoothly, tense is wrong and other basic errors - for example, in English, the title to your thread would better read "Please help me polish my writing skills!" or "I'm begging you to help me polish my writing skills."

What DL said, but you could also try asking for help in the story feedback section. Keep at it.

[bronzeage]

I suggest you spend more time reading English prose. Read it aloud and listen to the rhythm of the speech. This will help when you have to construct sentences. English is a language in which word order is very important.

Where you wrote, "My given below submission links will help you." a native English speaker would say, "My submission links, given below, will help you." Both sentences mean the same thing, but the first sounds awkward to the English ear.

One thing which can be a great help is an English grammar textbook. Study the rules for articles (a, an, the) and prepositions (at, on, to, with, etc). Proper use of these parts of speech make a great difference and will make your writing much easier to read.

Good Luck.

[BrianCaster]

Originally Posted by Dragonlipz

It's obvious that you like to write, but perhaps you should read some more fiction, well done fiction in English - it's also obvious that English is not your first language. That alone makes it very difficult to write prose. I'm only fluent in one other language, Espanol, and I would not even attempt to write prose in that tongue.
My other advice is to speak conversationally with native English speakers to absorb some of the nuances of the language...That would help you with the rhythms used..
Of course as the character Henry Higgins observes in the musical "My Fair Lady" (during the song 'Why don't the English speak English anymore?') "In America they haven't spoken it for years!"

Dear Dragonlipz,

I have started to read English novels since three months. I know I have to keep patience.
Here none speak English, so i don't get enough conversational practice.

I don't want to write in my native language, because it mainly restricted to my state and each state has different languages. It looks me time wasting to write in mother tongue. In English I get review, about my writing from, most part of the world.

I am very grateful to you for your important suggestions. I never imagined i would got three responses, as literotica readers main interest is in erotics

[BrianCaster]

Originally Posted by jomar

Hello...

It looks as though English is not your native language because some of the writing doesn't flow smoothly, tense is wrong and other basic errors - for example, in English, the title to your thread would better read "Please help me polish my writing skills!" or "I'm begging you to help me polish my writing skills."

What DL said, but you could also try asking for help in the story feedback section. Keep at it.

Dear Jomar,

It is right that English is not my native language. However I am doing my graduation in English literature. That's why I think it will be mended in future years.

I will ask help in story feedback section. It is really good idea.

Thanks for your response.

[BrianCaster]

Dear readers.

I think, the novice writers like me is more suitable with using present tense. Therefor, I have written a essay in present tense. I need your comments to improvement.


One day I turn my path to God, but fails
http://www.literotica.com/stories/sh....php?id=443009

[DeeZire]

I think when writing in first person (present or past, it doesn't matter) the voice of the character becomes part of the story, giving you license to use improper grammar as a way to make your character more interesting. In your essay, the innocence implied by the grammar is a nice contrast with the moral dilemmas faced by the character. Perhaps turning your essay into a fiction piece would be a good way to endear readers to your style. We don't see much in the way of ashram fucking around here.

[BrianCaster]

Originally Posted by DeeZire

I think when writing in first person (present or past, it doesn't matter) the voice of the character becomes part of the story, giving you license to use improper grammar as a way to make your character more interesting. In your essay, the innocence implied by the grammar is a nice contrast with the moral dilemmas faced by the character. Perhaps turning your essay into a fiction piece would be a good way to endear readers to your style. We don't see much in the way of ashram fucking around here.

Dear DeeZire.

I have first time read positive response for my any piece of writing. I am feeling real joy after reading your feedback. It is my real experiences and i have tried to give it the form of words, it's not a fiction. To preserve its truthfulness i have decided essay form, otherwise I have to add imagination to some extent. And I prefer to write as it happened to me.

I am really grateful to your response. I never forger you!

Brian - If your read it, please let me know. Otherwise I will send you personal reply.

[Epmd607]

I took plenty of literary theory classes in college, read all the canonical type novels. But since my major wasn't English I never took any writing classes, except the freshman writing requirement, and I don't think I had to write an actual story... Anyway, writing stories isn't easy even when you're a native speaker of a language and have read a ton of high quality writing. I think I figured out poetry, but writing a story is tough without formal training in creative writing. Foreign writers can sometimes come up with interesting stories because of their strange phrasing, so keep writing OP and maybe try to get a formal writing class(or two) in your pocket.

[BrianCaster]

Originally Posted by Epmd607

I took plenty of literary theory classes in college, read all the canonical type novels. But since my major wasn't English I never took any writing classes, except the freshman writing requirement, and I don't think I had to write an actual story... Anyway, writing stories isn't easy even when you're a native speaker of a language and have read a ton of high quality writing. I think I figured out poetry, but writing a story is tough without formal training in creative writing. Foreign writers can sometimes come up with interesting stories because of their strange phrasing, so keep writing OP and maybe try to get a formal writing class(or two) in your pocket.

Dear Epmd,

I like that you response me regarding my writing difficulties. Your suggestion to get formal writing class, is really necessary especially writers like me. But I can't understand the meaning of OP. What is it?

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Didnt I see you on Saturday Night Live with Dan Ackroyd? Youre the other wild and crazy guy, right?

Unfortunately we have no huge American breasts at LIT, just huge American asses.

[TxRad]

Originally Posted by JAMESBJOHNSON

Didnt I see you on Saturday Night Live with Dan Ackroyd? Youre the other wild and crazy guy, right?

Unfortunately we have no huge American breasts at LIT, just huge American asses.

And you are trying for number one on that list today, I see.

[DeeZire]

Originally Posted by BrianCaster

....But I can't understand the meaning of OP. What is it?

"OP" is an abbreviation for "Original Poster", or at least that's the way I read it. In other words, the person who started the thread is the OP. (That would be you.)

Regarding posts from JamesBJohonson - they should not to be taken seriously. His hobby is insulting people, although he can be quite clever when he accidentally forgets about being annoying.

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Originally Posted by TxRad

And you are trying for number one on that list today, I see.

That thing up your ass was a nozzle from a Jack Daniels tanker truck refueling you intravenously.

[TxRad]

Originally Posted by JAMESBJOHNSON

That thing up your ass was a nozzle from a Jack Daniels tanker truck refueling you intravenously.

For a shit head you can be such an asshole.

You're scaring the newbie.

[Handley_Page]

Originally Posted by Dragonlipz

Of course as the character Henry Higgins observes in the musical "My Fair Lady" (during the song 'Why don't the English speak English anymore?') "In America they haven't spoken it for years!"

Erm. . . "Why can't the English teach their children how to speak?"


To: BrianCaster

You might like to listen to VOA or the BBC broadcasts in English. It will be a long haul, but it will, I think, help you with syntax and rhythm.
I get the impression that your native language is more staccato, with few ways of saying something particular . This means that you are thinking in your native tongue and translating (sometimes transliterating) . You need to think in English.

You've chosen a very, very steep hill to climb. I wish you the best of luck.

[BrianCaster]

Originally Posted by Handley_Page

Erm. . . "Why can't the English teach their children how to speak?"


To: BrianCaster

You might like to listen to VOA or the BBC broadcasts in English. It will be a long haul, but it will, I think, help you with syntax and rhythm.
I get the impression that your native language is more staccato, with few ways of saying something particular . This means that you are thinking in your native tongue and translating (sometimes transliterating) . You need to think in English.

You've chosen a very, very steep hill to climb. I wish you the best of luck.

Dear Handley,

In our television BBC doesn't broadcast because of our cable connector. But I listen Indian based English news channel. Sometimes I try to listen AXN, Star Movies, but I can't understand.(though in near future, this practice, i should do regularly to improve) Indian pronounce each word differently than American and Britishers.

You have guessed correct. All time I think in mother tongue and then try to translate, even in speaking! Sometimes I can't find correct word and it spoil my writing. Our language hasn't like I'm or we're.

I really grateful to you for your suggestion and I am going to apply it.

[Dragonlipz]

Originally Posted by Handley_Page

Erm. . . "Why can't the English teach their children how to speak?"


To: BrianCaster

You might like to listen to VOA or the BBC broadcasts in English. It will be a long haul, but it will, I think, help you with syntax and rhythm.
I get the impression that your native language is more staccato, with few ways of saying something particular . This means that you are thinking in your native tongue and translating (sometimes transliterating) . You need to think in English.

You've chosen a very, very steep hill to climb. I wish you the best of luck.

HP - Thank you for the correction but after checking the song list I find that the song's title is:
"Why can't the English teach" My apologies to all for the oversight....

BC - I join Handley Page in wishing you the best of luck in your endeavor...Every 'author' here has offered you good advice.
Don't be discouraged by 'JAMESBJOHNSON' - he's not an author here, but merely a 'pet' that we keep around for entertainment. You are most welcome here. Feel free to ask any question, any time....
I agree that you need to think as well as speak in English in order to compose fiction. This is true in any language. So you should be comfortable writing prose in your native language....Writing is a universal form of communication and expression...

[Handley_Page]

Originally Posted by Dragonlipz

HP - Thank you for the correction but after checking the song list I find that the song's title is:
"Why can't the English teach" My apologies to all for the oversight....

.

My apologies for quoting the first line of that brilliant song.

"One common language I'm afraid we'll never speak,
Oh why can't the English
Learn
to Speak!"

Unfortunately, he was quite right:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EAYUuspQ6BY

[Handley_Page]

Originally Posted by BrianCaster

Dear Handley,

In our television BBC doesn't broadcast because of our cable connector. But I listen Indian based English news channel. Sometimes I try to listen AXN, Star Movies, but I can't understand.(though in near future, this practice, i should do regularly to improve) Indian pronounce each word differently than American and Britishers.

You have guessed correct. All time I think in mother tongue and then try to translate, even in speaking! Sometimes I can't find correct word and it spoil my writing. Our language hasn't like I'm or we're.

I really grateful to you for your suggestion and I am going to apply it.

If you have access to a Radio, do try and receive the Overseas broadcasts of the BBC.

Incidentally, what is your native tongue ?

[driphoney]

Originally Posted by Handley_Page

If you have access to a Radio, do try and receive the Overseas broadcasts of the BBC.

Incidentally, what is your native tongue ?

Maybe I should take a listen as well. I did, once, get asked by a German the 'proper' way to pronounce something. When I pressed I discovered he was wanting the Queen's way. I was inadequate to the task.

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

I think Brian is an imposter and having a goof on you people.

[driphoney]

Originally Posted by JAMESBJOHNSON

I think Brian is an imposter and having a goof on you people.

Maybe, but he's good at it. He also makes sure to post in the right timeframe, which is quite clever, you must admit.

[TxRad]

Originally Posted by driphoney

Maybe, but he's good at it. He also makes sure to post in the right timeframe, which is quite clever, you must admit.

Cynical is as cynical does, in JBJ's case.