Quote:
Originally Posted by mikeaday
i just posted a new story. it was written for a particular member and i would like some feedback.
the story can be found here
http://www.literotica.com/stories/sh....php?id=445038
it is about an 18 year old seducing his youth pastors wife
any constructive feedback is appriciated |
First thing, there was no seduction - which would have improved the story.
Pastor's wives don't suddenly fuck the pool boy unless there is some reason. her husband trusts her and within minutes the kid is groping through her underwear drawer and fucking.
Sorry, there's more realism in Winnie the Pooh - and this is not a really good stroke story.
You write well but you plot poorly.
Please, have you any idea of what the difference is between a woman who is bra size 26C and one of 40C? Read my explanation
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