I am so depressed right now.

[ChasingShadowsX]

I need help, like just a little bit of advice. I am really down.

I just broke up with my partner of 3 years. So I am sad about that.

But I am alone and I am scared, because I am bi-sexual and I have so many secrets in the closet that every time I get close to someone I am scared I will be found out. I hate the things I enjoy sexually and hate who I am intimately.

Part of me knows the only reason I am so disturbed by what I do is because society tells me to be ashamed.

But society also tells every1 else to be ashamed of me.

I want to clear out all of my secrets, I want to get rid of them but when I have in the past they come back to haunt me. I desire them.

I am talking about sex toys, dildos etc, lubes, lingerie i wear etc.

I don't want to be that person I want to be normal and just take pleasure in my partner, a beautiful woman.

I want that love, I want kids and I want a family with the person I love.

I even think I found her but I think deep down she was disturbed by who I am. I told her about my desires. She couldn't handle them I think and eventually its taken its toll.

I don't know where to go now. I am miserable at the moment and I can't sleep and I have to work in 8 hours. Which isn't too bad except I've been averaging 4 hours sleep a night and working 74 hour weeks.

[JackAssJim]

These LT alts...

[HB1965]

Originally Posted by ChasingShadowsX

I need help, like just a little bit of advice. I am really down.

I just broke up with my partner of 3 years. So I am sad about that.

But I am alone and I am scared, because I am bi-sexual and I have so many secrets in the closet that every time I get close to someone I am scared I will be found out. I hate the things I enjoy sexually and hate who I am intimately.

Part of me knows the only reason I am so disturbed by what I do is because society tells me to be ashamed.

But society also tells every1 else to be ashamed of me.

I want to clear out all of my secrets, I want to get rid of them but when I have in the past they come back to haunt me. I desire them.

I am talking about sex toys, dildos etc, lubes, lingerie i wear etc.

I don't want to be that person I want to be normal and just take pleasure in my partner, a beautiful woman.

I want that love, I want kids and I want a family with the person I love.

I even think I found her but I think deep down she was disturbed by who I am. I told her about my desires. She couldn't handle them I think and eventually its taken its toll.

I don't know where to go now. I am miserable at the moment and I can't sleep and I have to work in 8 hours. Which isn't too bad except I've been averaging 4 hours sleep a night and working 74 hour weeks.

Dude I feel for you but this is not the place. People here will only make fun of you and give you crap. My suggestion is the Gay/Les/Bi forum

Also I can say get some counseling. I'm sure that can help you more than the people on a Porn board.

[JackAssJim]

Originally Posted by HB1965

Dude I feel for you but this is not the place. People here will only make fun of you and give you crap. My suggestion is the Gay/Les/Bi forum


That being said, my suggestion is get some counseling. I'm sure that can help you more than the people on a Porn board.

I'd find a new fucking job. No woman is going to give you pussy with you working 74 hours a week.

[ChasingShadowsX]

Thanks, can a mod transfer this to the right forum then?

Also I work 74 hours a week cuz I want to get some where. Your probably right though, maybe I should just concentrate on what im doing on leave girls out of the sum.

[JohnnySavage]

Originally Posted by JackAssJim

I'd find a new fucking job. No woman is going to give you pussy with you working 74 hours a week.

If it has tits or tires, it's gonna be nothing but trouble.

[JackAssJim]

Originally Posted by ChasingShadowsX

Thanks, can a mod transfer this to the right forum then?

Also I work 74 hours a week cuz I want to get some where. Your probably right though, maybe I should just concentrate on what im doing on leave girls out of the sum.

I know the sheep industry down there where you are at is busy but fer Christ's sakes man, give 'em a rest already.

Oh, BTW, I'm the GB mod and no, no transfer for you.

[LadyFunkenstein]

There's nothing in your post that's all that weird. If those are your secrets, I suggest you start telling your potential partners far sooner, within the first handful of dates. Most people on this forum are into some of the things you've listed, thats straight people, gay, folks in between. You are building these things up in your mind and making it into a big deal before you tell a woman. The next one, tell her early on. If she flees, you have done both of you a favor as you won't waste each other's time on a relationship that is going to leave one or both of you unsatified. You need to find a woman who finds that stuff hot, in the same way you do. Merely tolerating you and what you enjoy will not do.

Plenty of women around who would find if highly erotic to particpate in the things you enjoy. Go find her and have the happy life you desire.

[Corruptible]

Originally Posted by LadyFunkenstein

There's nothing in your post that's all that weird. If those are your secrets, I suggest you start telling your potential partners far sooner, within the first handful of dates. Most people on this forum are into some of the things you've listed, thats straight people, gay, folks in between. You are building these things up in your mind and making it into a big deal before you tell a woman. The next one, tell her early on. If she flees, you have done both of you a favor as you won't waste each other's time on a relationship that is going to leave one or both of you unsatified. You need to find a woman who finds that stuff hot, in the same way you do. Merely tolerating you and what you enjoy will not do.

Plenty of women around who would find if highly erotic to particpate in the things you enjoy. Go find her and have the happy life you desire.

Truth.

Shadows, your kinks aren't liabilities, they're not secrets to be kept, they're spices for a relationship with a woman of similar tastes. Hell, you've got some in common with me. Don't think of them as secrets, think of them as intimate details of your sex life. Naturally enough, you wouldn't tell family or friends (or maybe you would, depends on how open you are about your sex life with them), but prospective partners should know fairly early on and not in a "deep dark secret revealing" manner.

[meat_robot]

Stop being afraid (a tall order but not impossible. Think about it!)

After all its your life and to enjoy it you've got to accept you true self. Self hatred and shame are most likely due to things you were taught when you were very young. Maybe religion is partially to blame or strict repressed parenting. None the less one you break your problems down and think about them as logically as you can you'll see they are not as insurmountable as they seem to be.

Also if you can lean on your friends for support.

And try to get a bit more sleep.

Amazing what a good diet and 6-7 hours of sleep can do for the psyche.

[English Lady]

You've got great advice here, you've got nothing to be ashamed and secretive about at all.

I am sure you will find someone who loves you for all that you are, you've just got to be honest with yourself and others. I think you may find people are generally alot more tolerant than you're giving them credit for.

[pink_]

You sound kind of wonderful to me, you've just not met the right woman yet. i agree with the others, keep yourself open, no reason to hide. You've done nothing wrong, just be yourself.

[IrezumiKiss]

Accept your sexual nature and make it a part of your overall health, not a detriment. Treat it like a plant and keep it in the sun, not in the dark. Robin Byrd is still shakin' it and still happily flying her freak flag high. So can you!

[rainbowgirl1028]

if your secrets are the things you mentioned in your first post, you have nothing to worry about and should embrace who you are completely. if people don't accept it, they aren't worth your time in the first place.

[theRiot]

Originally Posted by pink_

You sound kind of wonderful to me, you've just not met the right woman yet. i agree with the others, keep yourself open, no reason to hide. You've done nothing wrong, just be yourself.

I definately concur with the above statement, and pretty much all the other statements before that; referencing all those who have taken the time to encourage you. And even though I don't know you, I want to encourage you too. You're not alone in this, not by a long shot. And it's nothing to hang yourself over (not that you were threatening to do so). I am one who calls himself a loner, and throughout my most of my life I've acted very awkward towards any woman I found attractive because my immediate thoughts always revolved around really kinky sex. But I've been fortunate in that eventually I found a few women who enjoyed what I was into. With my last girlfriend, it took me almost two whole months for me to break the news. She accepted and allowed herself to jump in. This has nothing to do with where you are @ currently (in your own head), but to say that I certainly understand your reluctance to share your whole self. Again, there is no reason for you to be ashamed of yourself in this regard, no matter what people say. And shame is such a shitty emotion to endure anyway. I really struggled with that for a long time. That and misdirected anger. They're so non-constructive.

[LadyFunkenstein]

Originally Posted by IrezumiKiss

Accept your sexual nature and make it a part of your overall health, not a detriment. Treat it like a plant and keep it in the sun, not in the dark. Robin Byrd is still shakin' it and still happily flying her freak flag high. So can you!

I forgot all about Robyn Byrd - glad to see she's still around. The media seems to go out of its way to portray women over the age of 45 as sexless, really pretty well unworthy of sexual attention at all. (I recall a Gawker review of the show Cougartown with an aside about Cox "Come on guys, you know you'd hit it after a few beers. ) That's bullshit.

[NoJo]

Originally Posted by pink_

You sound kind of wonderful to me, you've just not met the right woman yet. i agree with the others, keep yourself open, no reason to hide. You've done nothing wrong, just be yourself.

The cool punk lady is on the money.

And I know a surprising number of women who get off on seeing men wear lingerie

[smallgirl]

Originally Posted by ChasingShadowsX

I need help, like just a little bit of advice. I am really down.

I just broke up with my partner of 3 years. So I am sad about that.

But I am alone and I am scared, because I am bi-sexual and I have so many secrets in the closet that every time I get close to someone I am scared I will be found out. I hate the things I enjoy sexually and hate who I am intimately.

Part of me knows the only reason I am so disturbed by what I do is because society tells me to be ashamed.

But society also tells every1 else to be ashamed of me.

I want to clear out all of my secrets, I want to get rid of them but when I have in the past they come back to haunt me. I desire them.

I am talking about sex toys, dildos etc, lubes, lingerie i wear etc.

I don't want to be that person I want to be normal and just take pleasure in my partner, a beautiful woman.

I want that love, I want kids and I want a family with the person I love.

I even think I found her but I think deep down she was disturbed by who I am. I told her about my desires. She couldn't handle them I think and eventually its taken its toll.

I don't know where to go now. I am miserable at the moment and I can't sleep and I have to work in 8 hours. Which isn't too bad except I've been averaging 4 hours sleep a night and working 74 hour weeks.

you just havent met the right woman...we are out there. those who would accept you. keep your head up and keep looking.

[LadyFunkenstein]

Let's up the ante on this thread... this kid's HOT.



Honey, you have nothing to worry about. Trust me.

[NoJo]

Originally Posted by LadyFunkenstein

Let's up the ante on this thread... this kid's HOT.



Honey, you have nothing to worry about. Trust me.

Put him in a pair of sheer nylons and powder him up good for me

[LadyFunkenstein]

Originally Posted by Sub Joe

Put him in a pair of sheer nylons and powder him up good for me

My sentiments exactly, but I was going to do it to him for myself.

[IrezumiKiss]

Originally Posted by LadyFunkenstein

Let's up the ante on this thread... this kid's HOT.



Honey, you have nothing to worry about. Trust me.

That's dude? Damn, I'd fuck him if I was bi!

Jeezuz. I know he was being for real, but now a major part of my sympathy just flew out the window! He has one of those "I can eat three Big Macs for dinner every day for a week straight and not even see a bulge" bodies...

[LadyFunkenstein]

Originally Posted by IrezumiKiss

That's dude? Damn, I'd fuck him if I was bi!

Jeezuz. I know he was being for real, but now a major part of my sympathy just flew out the window! He has one of those "I can eat three Big Macs for dinner every day for a week straight and not even see a bulge" bodies...

[Javagirl2008]

Originally Posted by JackAssJim

I'd find a new fucking job. No woman is going to give you pussy with you working 74 hours a week.

lmao But at least he could impress her with lingerie if he doesnt wear it himself first

This sounds like the begining of a Rory circle jerk thread "and I was standing there with my cock in my hand jerking in front of hot bois"

[ChasingShadowsX]

wow you guys really know how to make someone feel better about themself. Although where did u get those photos lol, i thought I deleted them all they were kinda embarrasing.

Anyway I just dunno how to be honest about who I am with other people, I feel like they will hate me and spread rumours. Of course if they chose not to accept me maybe they arent worth my time but still I don't need rumours going around about me

I kinda work in a very public place and dont need the stress of every1 talking behind my back. Also i dont want to come out or anything because I am happy with girls, I want a normal relationship and I wish I was normal.

I am very akward around girls though, and when I get close to someone I feel like as soon as I tell them who I am then they will leave me. Which even if they arent worth my time it still hurts. Also I don't know if i can be too honest too early in a relationship, for the rumour thing again, too many people know people I know and it'll just get around and I don't need every1 knowing my personal life.

thanks for all the comments, I really apreciate the honesty and kind words.