I can only speak for myself. When it first happened I was livid. After a few days apart we got together to talk and see where we were going to go next. My wife and I do love each other. Our problem sounds similar to your’s. Due to various reasons my sex drive has been greatly reduced. Over the course of time we both decided we didn’t want a divorce. The next part was my acceptance that I was no longer able to fulfill her physical needs. Once I faced that truth we have been able to compromise and while our relationship is different we both feel it is stronger.
Good luck to you
Figures I'd find a more fitting thread for a post I already made. Ah well. Pasting it in.
Here me out on this one. I once cheated, they ended up shooting themselves. While that alone wasn't the deciding factor it did get both her, me and others hurt. So do NOT take this lightly. That is a risk of cheating. I'm not trying to put anyone off, I'm simply stating alternatives that might not have been considered. Having been there myself I can see the appeal but I can also see the downsides too.
Now if "Others can be seen without someone having to give a green light" is established that's fine and dandy. Even doms don't get to decide that for me. I got no problem with that whatsoever. It's actually something I have to make very clear myself. If someone doesn't like it then tough titties. It's not cheating if it's established, yet I can and will see others regardless. As will they of course. Even people that "lump it" can still be gotten closer with through "being there" and communication. Even if they use it'll never happen logic (which I have bypassed myself). It's important to make that much known at least I think. Simply stating "Others can/might matter" or "I will have flings". Who doesn't have to be gone over but not even stating "It might happen" can lead to a lack of trust and hurting others. Which happens often when there's secrets or/and lies in a relationship. "Multiple people" I can see the appeal in. Others mattering and multiple needs. But when it comes to cheating I would actually like to ask if it's worth even a minor risk of events I gone over as described above. It's by no means a fantasy and can go well. But it can be gone well without having to risk trust or hurting others too. If that takes something away from the experience and someone needs the "whole package" of, say, cuckholding then fair enough. Just, you know, make sure whoever you're currently with at the time hasn't so much has hinted at being too hard on themselves or commented about toasters in a bath. Comments like "I don't feel alive" when a fortune cookie comments about life shouldn't be dismissed as jokes either. Be aware of such signs or risk putting others in danger.
I know, I know. I'm often one of the first to go "People like the danger". Heck, I'm a risk taker myself (or can appear to take more risks). But on this matter I simply had to cover "play safe" on the matter due to... traumatic personal experience. I don't believe I've ever seen this kind of topic go into the safety of it.
