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Old 10-30-2017, 11:29 PM   #1
PlagueDr
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To Authors... do you write in secret?

Greetings. So I have read stories off here for years and am writing my very first one. I used to write as a kid (not like this) and since starting have been having a blast with it. I feel focused on the story aspect of it then just the sex, moreso than I thought I would. That being said, I have a fiancee I love tremendously and havent told her I started doing this. Makes me feel like I'm hiding something.

So to all those other authors, do you guys or girls write in secret? Or do your significant others know? If so how did you tell them, and were they receptive to it? I know that my girl does read Literotica as well because we talked about it, I am just worried that maybe she will think something in my story is weird or off.

I really don't like hiding it, just nervous to tell her.

Last edited by PlagueDr : 10-31-2017 at 07:05 AM.
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Old 10-30-2017, 11:44 PM   #2
Damoiselle
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My significant other is actually my editor. It's awesome.
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Old 10-30-2017, 11:45 PM   #3
HeyAll
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I dont tell anyone. If I'm writing and someone comes, i change the screen.
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Old 10-31-2017, 12:44 AM   #4
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Quote:
Originally Posted by HeyAll View Post
I dont tell anyone. If I'm writing and someone comes, i change the screen.
Same.

My husband found some of my writing on a tablet a year or two ago when I was away on a work trip, and started reading. I wanted to crawl in a hole and die when he told me, even though he was like 'wow, you write! How did I not know? This is awesome!'

I sometimes ask him questions that relate to a story I'm writing, but never tell him why I'm asking. I'm sure he's perplexed by queries such as 'Pretend you're alone on a farm with no one around. How do you get rid of a body?' and 'as a straight man, how do you feel about lesbian porn where one of the women is wearing a strap on?' but he always answers.

I prefer to keep it secret as my partners have had an alarming habit of becoming proud of me, and showing people what I write. This is really not cool when your boyfriend gives you his Mum m/m smut you've written....
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Old 10-31-2017, 01:22 AM   #5
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My erotica is written in secret. My mainstream writing isn't (but obviously, my mainstream writing doesn't take nearly the time to write that everyone around me thinks it does.)
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Old 10-31-2017, 01:24 AM   #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sr71plt View Post
My erotica is written in secret. My mainstream writing isn't (but obviously, my mainstream writing doesn't take nearly the time to write that everyone around me thinks it does.)
Ha ha ha. I like it!
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Old 10-31-2017, 02:38 AM   #7
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Yes, it's a private world. I do all my writing on a kindle so it's quite separate from the house pc.
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Old 10-31-2017, 02:42 AM   #8
Bramblethorn
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Damoiselle View Post
My significant other is actually my editor. It's awesome.
Same here, and I also edit her stuff. Most of my family knows I published an erotic romance and a couple of them bought the e-book, to my horror :-)
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Old 10-31-2017, 02:48 AM   #9
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I write in secret too. I'm not ashamed of my writing, but I don't trust anyone not to misunderstand implications. For instance, a fair few involves wife or girlfriend sharing, and while it's a hot fantasy, reality is more complicated. Also, I'm a University professor, and I don't like the idea of my students somehow finding out about my stories. They already get distracted too easily.
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Old 10-31-2017, 03:15 AM   #10
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Old 10-31-2017, 05:39 AM   #11
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Quote:
Originally Posted by HeyAll View Post
I dont tell anyone. If I'm writing and someone comes, i change the screen.
If I’m writing and someone comes, then I’ve written well.






Rimshot.

OP, I’m secret too. I love my wife, but I doubt she’d be crazy about some of the themes I tend to write about.
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Old 10-31-2017, 05:46 AM   #12
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Yes, I write in secret; I read in secret too. My wife wouldn’t understand the stories and feel threatened by them. We have clashed over much more innocent things than this. In addition, it isn’t something I want to share with my children.

Writing used to be a way to vent, and to order my thoughts. Now, the urge to write and the struggling and dissatisfaction of the results sometimes turns it into a burden.
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Old 10-31-2017, 06:11 AM   #13
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My boyfriend not only read everything I've written, when I wrote sections based on our relationship, he insisted that I use his real name.
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Old 10-31-2017, 06:43 AM   #14
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My partner was the one that persuaded me to start writing and posting my stories online. I used to make up these little role playing fantasy stories for him as well as just writing for myself. He told me they were to good to just share only with him and he encouraged me to do more writing and pointed me at Literotica for a ready made audience. So I write openly at home, he reads all my stories. He doesn't edit or anything but he will make male audience suggestions. He loves my stories, he's always encouraging me and he totally understands my addiction to writing. He loves role playing out some of my sex scenes ... and neither of us mention my subject matter to anyone else. For those who know I write a lot, it's "romance"
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Old 10-31-2017, 09:54 AM   #15
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When I was married my then wife knew but wasn't thrilled. Now not only does my girlfriend of seven years know, she met me here.
My son, two best friends and a college colleague know me as both the real and my erotica pen name.
I am also a mainstream writer. I keep Litfan10 and my professional career faaaaaaar apart and the twain don't meet.
Same with my college teaching, other than one colleague the dept doesn't know of Litfan10 and it's staying that way for job security.
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Old 10-31-2017, 10:04 AM   #16
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I should mention that my son when he first read my erotic stuff looked at me and said, "Who are you and what have you done with my dad."
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Love is a portion of the soul itself, and it is of the same nature as the celestial breathing of the atmosphere of paradise. ~ Victor Hugo My soul; my paradise

She was never as simple as she led them to believe; She was the keeper of a secret flame, and she waited patiently for somebody to see it, and love it, as it burned.--Jose Chaves - Seen, Loved, and Cherished

"You sir, have a mucky mind" - Dianthus 7/26/10
"Yes, it's official. You are cute!" - slave_ 09/09/10
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"You are so full of s**t your eyes are brown" (and they really are!) - TxRad 7/24/10



I'm a perverted, smut minded, slave owning, poly-amorous, bisexual Buddhist - been a Hell of a journey getting me here but I love the destination Me

product of my mucky mind
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Old 10-31-2017, 02:44 PM   #17
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Secret. My husband knows I write but he doesn’t know how far into the weeds I get.

I would love to welcome him in and share, but I have felt discouraged. I emailed him one story about us and then waited on pins and needles for him to say something or respond at all. Nothing for four days until I couldn’t wait any longer and asked him about it. He shrugged. Of all the reactions, ambivalence was probably the worst one I could dream up.

So now I write dirty, taboo and in secret.
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Old 10-31-2017, 02:45 PM   #18
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Well, after seeing it was pretty split down the middle I did decide to tell her. It was a bit awkward at first and she seemed worried I was trying to act out some hidden fantasy by writing, which made me chuckle based on the story plot (because that just isn't possible).
After working through her initial reaction she seemed supportive and just asked if she could read it eventually, which I told her would be likely.

Thanks for the support. Much appreciated.
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Old 10-31-2017, 02:47 PM   #19
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Yes. No one knows that I write these stories.
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Old 10-31-2017, 03:05 PM   #20
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I told my spouse after my first story was published. I was hoping that it might spice things up a bit, but there has been absolutely no interest, and the subject has never come up again.

My father is a writer (not erotica). I edit his work and he has always encouraged me to write my own stuff. I have been considering whether or not to tell him. Haven't made a decision yet.

Otherwise, I keep this part of my life a strict secret. I don't know that it would interfer with my professional life, but I don't want to take any chances.
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Old 10-31-2017, 03:33 PM   #21
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I wish I could tell more who know me as the other writer. I enjoy my erotic writing a lot and it is much more pure me by choice. I don't use editors or readers, until very recently again a choice more for the fun.
My professional writing has all sorts of eyes on it before it gets published which is fine, but I have a soft spot for my erotica.
But I've been warned that mainstream editors and publishers can shy away from erotic writers and my college dept head is an 18th century purest. Neither a healthy mix for an erotic writer.
So my closest will know alone.
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Love is a portion of the soul itself, and it is of the same nature as the celestial breathing of the atmosphere of paradise. ~ Victor Hugo My soul; my paradise

She was never as simple as she led them to believe; She was the keeper of a secret flame, and she waited patiently for somebody to see it, and love it, as it burned.--Jose Chaves - Seen, Loved, and Cherished

"You sir, have a mucky mind" - Dianthus 7/26/10
"Yes, it's official. You are cute!" - slave_ 09/09/10
"Now, you are a cute smart ass" - slave_ 10/21/10
"You are so full of s**t your eyes are brown" (and they really are!) - TxRad 7/24/10



I'm a perverted, smut minded, slave owning, poly-amorous, bisexual Buddhist - been a Hell of a journey getting me here but I love the destination Me

product of my mucky mind
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Old 10-31-2017, 03:37 PM   #22
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PlagueDr View Post
Well, after seeing it was pretty split down the middle I did decide to tell her. It was a bit awkward at first and she seemed worried I was trying to act out some hidden fantasy by writing, which made me chuckle based on the story plot (because that just isn't possible).
After working through her initial reaction she seemed supportive and just asked if she could read it eventually, which I told her would be likely.

Thanks for the support. Much appreciated.
congrats and happy writing.
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Love is a portion of the soul itself, and it is of the same nature as the celestial breathing of the atmosphere of paradise. ~ Victor Hugo My soul; my paradise

She was never as simple as she led them to believe; She was the keeper of a secret flame, and she waited patiently for somebody to see it, and love it, as it burned.--Jose Chaves - Seen, Loved, and Cherished

"You sir, have a mucky mind" - Dianthus 7/26/10
"Yes, it's official. You are cute!" - slave_ 09/09/10
"Now, you are a cute smart ass" - slave_ 10/21/10
"You are so full of s**t your eyes are brown" (and they really are!) - TxRad 7/24/10



I'm a perverted, smut minded, slave owning, poly-amorous, bisexual Buddhist - been a Hell of a journey getting me here but I love the destination Me

product of my mucky mind
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Old 10-31-2017, 06:19 PM   #23
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LoquiSordidaAdMe View Post
I told my spouse after my first story was published. I was hoping that it might spice things up a bit, but there has been absolutely no interest, and the subject has never come up again.

My father is a writer (not erotica). I edit his work and he has always encouraged me to write my own stuff. I have been considering whether or not to tell him. Haven't made a decision yet.

Otherwise, I keep this part of my life a strict secret. I don't know that it would interfer with my professional life, but I don't want to take any chances.
Very similar to me (my father was also a writer). I started writing when my marriage started to fall apart. Telling my spouse in the hope of improving our sex life had the unfortunate effect of accelerating the separation though. Hopefully our situations differ there.
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Old 10-31-2017, 07:04 PM   #24
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Quote:
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Very similar to me (my father was also a writer). I started writing when my marriage started to fall apart. Telling my spouse in the hope of improving our sex life had the unfortunate effect of accelerating the separation though. Hopefully our situations differ there.
Thanks, NoJo. That's nice of you. Sometimes I wonder if it wouldn't be better to accelerate, instead of dragging it out. I should probably delete that last sentence. Fuck it.
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Old 10-31-2017, 09:51 PM   #25
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My girlfriend knows too much.

TOO MUCH.

Thankfully, she accepts this as the price of living with an author.

Also, she has known pretty much all along, but I wasn't really worried about that since she's a sex-positive person.
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