How to ... write a PM to a woman
- Thread starter KimGordon67
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OTCurve
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I feel this is getting worse by degrees.
LearningToLOVEAgain
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I like to chat on here, but it is hard to find a good conversation, I find that those with a good introduction are the ones that I end up chatting with.
LanguageOfLove
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How do you chat without putting an ad in the personals, sometimes I'd like to have a good conversation, but don't want an ad in the personals. Could there be a post just for people who want to PM?
Just curious.
Just curious.
KimGordon67
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Hmmm ... I guess you could find people you like based on their posts in whatever forum you find the most interesting and just PM them yourself. That's how I've started at least two of my online 'things' ... in one instance we were both posting in a music-related thread, and clearly liked the same stuff; in another, he was posting in a thread of mine and I liked his style.
LearningToLOVEAgain
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Having a chat buddy is very nice!!
LanguageOfLove
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Ok, thanks for the advice, I have a few really good friends which is great, but I was kind of looking for someone to PM on a more daily basis, like to check in on our days and things like that.
I'll have a look around, but I don't think I'll PM, just a thought.
KimGordon67
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If you're wanting a man friend, a lot of the actually nice ones often won't send unsolicited PMs to women because ... well, mostly because they're just being nice and don't want to seem like they're harrassing women.
LanguageOfLove
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I've had a few really nice replies, some I lost touch with, but a few I keep in touch with and are great.
So I have to do the work now? Oh boy! lol
I'll keep trying till it works I guess.
mrcoolhandluke
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I think here are quite a few of us on here that are always interested in making new acquaintances.
mrcoolhandluke
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Very well said. Many of us are too reserved - even on here!
KimGordon67
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I actually often PM guys I like the 'look' of ... I don't understand why some women are so reticent about that.
mrcoolhandluke
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I suppose, as in real life, we do have to follow our instincts. I just think it is harder in the digital world since so many people seem to specialise in pretending.
KimGordon67
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In spite of having been burned before, I find it easier to just assume everyone's being honest until proven otherwise.
mrcoolhandluke
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At my age i must apologise for growing a little cynical lol
pplwatching
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I think that it's less that people specialize in pretending (with the exception of outright catfishing) than it is a combination of posts/messages acting as a kind of a filter or window into the real person behind it and a tendency on my part as a reader to fill in what I can't see with positive thoughts. Like Kim, I naturally seem to assume the best in people, and people do tend to write in a way that puts their best foot forward. I think that's natural. In the end everyone is just this big block of intriguing and interesting marble, and we each chip away at that perception to sculpt a more accurate impression. Sometimes we chisel in what we're looking for, and change the picture.
LanguageOfLove
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I'm learning how to look for posts with meaning. Since posting I have made a couple of chat friends. Its important not to take for granted what's right in front of you. Its not the quantity of chats...its the quality. I like that I have a few really good chat buddies on here. I really like having good conversations about anything.
lickitandstickit
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Dear Abby ( Kim )
I've never PM'd anybody here, not like I'm looking to bother/hassle women , and sure, I'm on a erotica site and this isn't my first time at the rodeo, however, It's probably worth mentioning as I've received my 14th PM from DUDES in my first month here, that there might be a need to expand on this idea... GUYS PM'G/Writing GUYS..I listed married in my profile, should have elaborated further on that a bit... . didn't see that one coming.... Please tell me I'm not the only one this is happening too...@*$(_$&$&
Sincerely
Anonymous Reader
I've never PM'd anybody here, not like I'm looking to bother/hassle women , and sure, I'm on a erotica site and this isn't my first time at the rodeo, however, It's probably worth mentioning as I've received my 14th PM from DUDES in my first month here, that there might be a need to expand on this idea... GUYS PM'G/Writing GUYS..I listed married in my profile, should have elaborated further on that a bit... . didn't see that one coming.... Please tell me I'm not the only one this is happening too...@*$(_$&$&
Sincerely
Anonymous Reader
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KimGordon67
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The guys approaching straight guys thing is utterly outside my field of expertise. You might need to contract that service out.
Bring_Back_Love
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Private chat
Hi, I am looking for a place to chat privately, not on the boards...how do I do that?
Hi, I am looking for a place to chat privately, not on the boards...how do I do that?
KimGordon67
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There are two options - Lit has a 'chat' section (click here). Like all real time chat sex-based sites, it can be a bit feral, although it's better than others I've seen.
Alternatively, you exchange private messages (PMs) with someone. If you click through to someone's user profile, there's the option of sending them a PM (unless they've disabled that option).
Semler
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KimGordon67
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Oh - I just assumed they were looking for something within Lit ... it didn't cross my mind to recommend other sites.
Semler
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I did too, but I thought I'd offer up this one anyway just in case.
I've had that happen a few times when guys read a post of mine that didn't specifically mention I was male and fired off an excited note, apparently without paying much attention to my profile (because, seriously, dozens of people have read the ads linked in my profile and had no trouble determining my gender).
That's why the first word in my bio is now "Male".
Btw, I don't mind if guys message me to comment on a thread or whatever, but mistaking me for a woman is a bit much.
