Old 01-22-2014, 12:15 AM   #1
Felineofavenueb
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kissing..

I'm seeing this really good looking guy, but he kisses horribly! It's like he's attacking my face with his tongue. How can I get him to kiss better without telling him and hurting his feelings???
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Old 01-22-2014, 01:43 AM   #2
SunDevilGirl
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Tell him he's too rough. And then tell him to not move at all and that you're going to kiss him the way you want to be kissed. Then show him how you like it.
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Old 01-22-2014, 01:55 AM   #3
Felineofavenueb
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you don't think that will hurt his feelings or ego?
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Old 01-22-2014, 02:09 AM   #4
SunDevilGirl
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Felineofavenueb View Post
you don't think that will hurt his feelings or ego?
It might, but would you rather have a bad kisser?

I really think you can do it without being insulting. Don't say "you're attacking my face!" Just say "too much....let me show you how I like it....don't move." And then make him forget his feelings are hurt.
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Old 01-22-2014, 02:32 AM   #5
fraankhardy
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Originally Posted by SunDevilGirl View Post
It might, but would you rather have a bad kisser?

I really think you can do it without being insulting. Don't say "you're attacking my face!" Just say "too much....let me show you how I like it....don't move." And then make him forget his feelings are hurt.
thts a gud idea ... u sud try this ...
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Old 01-22-2014, 10:47 AM   #6
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I don't even think you need to tell him that your idea was initiated by your opinion of his kissing...

slink over to him. when he reaches toward you, tell him to ssshhhh.. it's your turn to take charge..
give him a wink and kiss him gently, tenderly, up and down his body, all over his face..
and then tell him that you're going to let him participate..
but he has to kiss you like you kissed him
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Old 01-22-2014, 08:19 PM   #7
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I'd echo the above advice. It may be worth gently telling him you like kissing a different way to clear up any misconceptions and end it once and for all, otherwise he'll continue to kiss you and any future partners terribly. If his feelings are too hurt to let you make out with him a different way, then he doesn't deserve kissing.
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Old 01-24-2014, 04:50 AM   #8
WishItsTrue_TG
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Heart, it's all in the heart

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Originally Posted by Felineofavenueb View Post
I'm seeing this really good looking guy, but he kisses horribly! It's like he's attacking my face with his tongue. How can I get him to kiss better without telling him and hurting his feelings???
I've found a lot is influenced by how you really feel AND a consideration of the the other person. If you really don't mean to attack someone but be helpful, it comes across in the tone of your voice, your expression, your posture, the words you choose. Sincerity is a dependable allay.

I've told a potential LT girl of something that bothered me, and when I said it, I meant as way to continue together. I meant it as a pathway to a future. I wanted to continue with this woman and what I said I meant to convey what I really felt. She was embarrassed, and that made me feel bad for her. That was an innate response to how I really felt, and she picked up on the vib that I didn't mean any harm. It worked out. We stayed together, and the problem was seen no more.

Another time, considering the personalities involved, I buttoned my lip. The principle was not to hurt people but continue the relationship together. One woman, I loved to talk to her. We could talk hour after hour, day after day. But in the bedroom, she was stiff as a board, with all kinds of do's and don't's. She was a perfectionist, and I felt a criticism of her in the bedroom was an attack on the core of who she was. I wanted the relationship to go on because of how much I like the personality of the woman and our talks. In this case, I took the short end of the stick because of the harm I could have done, and attraction to her good qualities.

I think, Felineofavenueb, if you look to your heart, it can be your best choice. If you don't want to hurt people but make the situation better, it will show through.

Oh, one thing. This kinda' shoots my principle in the foot. Some people don't take any criticism. No matter what you say to them or whether it is helpful or not, they get angry. Too defensive. I find such people impossible to work with and move on.

PS. GiggLeGasm, you are so deliciously wicked!

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Old 01-24-2014, 01:54 PM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Felineofavenueb View Post
I'm seeing this really good looking guy, but he kisses horribly! It's like he's attacking my face with his tongue. How can I get him to kiss better without telling him and hurting his feelings???
If his feelings can be hurt that easily by a little honest, well-meant criticism, than maybe he's not the guy for you.

It occurs to me that he might not be very experienced, and he's taking cues from how people kiss on TV shows and in the movies, where the passions are usually over the top. Heavy kissing is just a short-cut way of saying "I'm really hot for you," and doesn't take up a lot of screen time, so it's used way more than it should. Yeah, it looks good on the screen, but sucks in real life, just like most of the simulated passion I've seen in the blue movies.

Demonstrate to him what you like him to do. If he's a real mensch, he'll be grateful for the instruction.
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Old 01-24-2014, 05:46 PM   #10
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My husband was a terrible kisser when we first met. He's also a sensitive soul whose feelings could have been hurt quite easily and I totally second the approach whereby you teach through demonstration. I used to do the 'let me kiss you like this' and then get him to reciprocate in a similar way. He wanted to do it the way that turned me on the most and so adapted his technique accordingly. He went from washing machine to tender lover in no time! It can be done!

Last edited by Suzy__Tapshoes : 01-24-2014 at 05:49 PM.
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Old 01-25-2014, 08:06 AM   #11
PepsiAnna
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Next time, pull back tell him to stop and say, "try this". Make an effort to show how you would like it to be...
Most of them don't know what the fuck they are doing and would take such a "lesson" rather enthusiastically...
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Old 01-25-2014, 03:55 PM   #12
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Make sure you phrase whatever you say as, "I like to be kissed this way..." Rather than "I don't like how you kiss."
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Old 01-25-2014, 03:57 PM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Felineofavenueb View Post
I'm seeing this really good looking guy, but he kisses horribly! It's like he's attacking my face with his tongue. How can I get him to kiss better without telling him and hurting his feelings???
Sorry to say is that not everyone can kiss good. I deplore a crappy kisser, the best kissers and the best lovers and turn ons.
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Old 01-25-2014, 04:03 PM   #14
babyjane20011
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Originally Posted by Felineofavenueb View Post
I'm seeing this really good looking guy, but he kisses horribly! It's like he's attacking my face with his tongue. How can I get him to kiss better without telling him and hurting his feelings???
think many dont know how to kiss

Nancy
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