Old 07-02-2013, 08:49 PM   #876
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Dear Laurel,

Don't tell anyone I said this, but I think curry is one of the worst foods ever.

Well actually, between that and Thai food, I dunno which I dislike more.

Picky eatingly yours,

Indie

We will never be friends.
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Old 07-03-2013, 01:36 AM   #877
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Dear Laurel,

I cannot sleep.

And now I'm pondering on why the hell any man would try to tell any woman what is or isn't appropriate weight gain/loss when it comes to birthing babes.

When they push a watermelon out of their ass, then by all means they can have an opinion.

Love,
LTR
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Old 07-03-2013, 09:56 AM   #878
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Dear Kyle,

Have you ever experienced the weird bliss that comes from having a cat asleep on your lap, so deeply asleep that he's dreaming and so obviously feeling safe and comfortable that it's okay to be that deep?

Affectionately,

P
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Old 07-03-2013, 11:06 AM   #879
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Dear Laurel,

Would you and Manu like to go play with me at Dorney tomorrow?

Love,
LTR
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Old 07-03-2013, 11:08 AM   #880
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Dear Laurel,

Could you find me a sugar daddy that would be willing to donate $2500 so that I can be finished with fundraising stress? I'll be sure to share him.

Yours,
blackleggings
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Old 07-03-2013, 11:23 AM   #881
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Dear Laurel,

I dig the curry. Indian curry (wet or dry), Japanese curry, Thai curry (my favorite types actually) - all good with me. Send some over please.

Love,

Laurel

P.S. Agreed on the picky eaters part. No one should eat or do something they don't enjoy. And more for me!

*

Dear Perg,

Very cute! Does s/he have a name?

Though I admit to being slightly disturbed that you posted that pic and the words "butt lube" in the same post. *clenches*

Love,

Laurel

*

Dear Indie,

You're not alone. Many many people - some who I love and adore even - dislike and even despise curry. It's okay - I'll eat your share.

Love,

Laurel

*

Dear pete1968,

I agree. I have upped her salary to 3x what I was paying her before.

Love,

Laurel

*

Dear lovetoread,

I love IHOP and jelly doughnuts. And all food. Which is making my diet impossible. Food needs to taste less delicious if I'm ever going to make headway.

Love,

Laurel

P.S. re: pregnancy and men: if people weren't allowed to have uninformed, useless opinions, most would have no opinions at all. Or something.

*

Dear blackleggings,

I could, but I've been told that sugar daddies are not as fun as you'd think. A knowledgeable source one told me that it's actually less hassle to earn the money at a crappy job than to deal with a wealthy dude's b.s.

Love,

Laurel
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Old 07-03-2013, 11:56 AM   #882
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Laurel View Post
Dear Laurel,

I dig the curry. Indian curry (wet or dry), Japanese curry, Thai curry (my favorite types actually) - all good with me. Send some over please.

Love,

Laurel

P.S. Agreed on the picky eaters part. No one should eat or do something they don't enjoy. And more for me!

*
oh my gawd, you outin' me as you, laurel?

bwahahahahaha
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Old 07-03-2013, 11:58 AM   #883
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Dear Laurel,

How many alts do we have?

Love,
LTR
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Old 07-03-2013, 11:59 AM   #884
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Dear Laurel,

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Qis6VhHWuA


Yours in listening to elevator music,

islandman
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Old 07-03-2013, 12:16 PM   #885
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Dear Laurel,

I am almost positive there is something wrong with my Private Messaging. I'm pretty sure it should be filled with all sorts of fascinating things, but instead it is just about empty. Could you please look into this? {But not too closely, just in case it is suddenly filled with messages that might make a sensible woman such as yourself blush.}

Sincerely,

the kinda bored and just a bit starved for attention good little witch.
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Old 07-03-2013, 12:34 PM   #886
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Dear Glynndah,

Maybe some of your messages are getting forwarded to my inbox by mistake as mine is getting cluttered up with all sorts of messages from earnest young men wanting to do a variety of interesting things to a woman a bit older than themselves.

They also refer to liking posts I have never written or responding to my ad even though they meet almost none of the criteria.

Perhaps I should forward these back to your inbox for you so I can get back to reading the ones that make me what to jump on a plane or tie ankles to chairs even though I am not into bondage.

Love,

Noor
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I did feel like Icarus-Byron in Exile

Quote:
Posted by Byron In Exile 05-30-2014
Quote:
Originally Posted by Noor
all that and a bag of chips
She sent me that in the mail.
"He felt you, and he took you with him everywhere. I think he took part of you with him to wherever he is now. That's part of why it hurts so much." Phelia on Byron to me.

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Which altereth when it alteration findeth"-Shakespeare
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Old 07-03-2013, 12:51 PM   #887
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Originally Posted by Noor View Post
Dear Glynndah,

Maybe some of your messages are getting forwarded to my inbox by mistake as mine is getting cluttered up with all sorts of messages from earnest young men wanting to do a variety of interesting things to a woman a bit older than themselves.

They also refer to liking posts I have never written or responding to my ad even though they meet almost none of the criteria.

Perhaps I should forward these back to your inbox for you so I can get back to reading the ones that make me what to jump on a plane or tie ankles to chairs even though I am not into bondage.

Love,

Noor
Dear Noor,

I was going to say that I really didn't want your castoffs, but upon further contemplation, I realized there probably had been a mix-up in the PM service and some of those needy young men are undoubtedly mine. However, I do not remember placing an ad so I'm afraid you will have to deal with those all by yourself.

Sincerely yours,

the soon to be dreading opening her inbox good little witch.
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"My! People come and go so quickly here!"
“Technically, a witch is always a lady, except when circumstances dictate otherwise.”

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Old 07-03-2013, 01:14 PM   #888
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Dear Noor,

I was going to say that I really didn't want your castoffs, but upon further contemplation, I realized there probably had been a mix-up in the PM service and some of those needy young men are undoubtedly mine. However, I do not remember placing an ad so I'm afraid you will have to deal with those all by yourself.

Sincerely yours,

the soon to be dreading opening her inbox good little witch.

Dear Soon to be Dreading,

Will do!

Don't worry my castoffs get deleted to save space as 500 messages is never enough. Even after a major deleting last night I back at at 493 this morning.
I wonder whose pms those are then?

Any woman here is not getting any pms off her ad, pls let me know. Sometimes they mention breasts so you might have them in your profile.

Anyone who gets pms mentioning the Narrows at Zion, those are probably for me. Also any brick laying vegetable farming silly Phds talking about clementines.

Love,

Noor
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I did feel like Icarus-Byron in Exile

Quote:
Posted by Byron In Exile 05-30-2014
Quote:
Originally Posted by Noor
all that and a bag of chips
She sent me that in the mail.
"He felt you, and he took you with him everywhere. I think he took part of you with him to wherever he is now. That's part of why it hurts so much." Phelia on Byron to me.

"Love is not love
Which altereth when it alteration findeth"-Shakespeare
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Old 07-03-2013, 01:24 PM   #889
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Dear Indie

You've plummeted to new levels of cuntishness. Curries/Indian Food is the best. I'd sell my soul to the devil for a good bhaji.

Not only is your taste in music dubious but you prefer to eat bland, tastless shite whilst listening to your angst ridden morons, no doubt.

I hate you.

Yours, loving the spices

Fata
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Old 07-03-2013, 01:34 PM   #890
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Dear Doyle,

You need to head over to Leicester, I'll take you down the Golden Mile as well as to the restaurant favoured by Englebert when he is here.

Yours, Bodie.
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Old 07-03-2013, 01:37 PM   #891
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Dear Bodie

I know what your "golden mile" would involve. You dirty fucking bastard.

Yours

Doyle
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Old 07-03-2013, 01:42 PM   #892
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Dear Laurel,

If I had one wish in this world, it would be that Fata could get over his obvious pain, and abandon her darkened heart. It makes me cry whenever I see her post with such vitriol. I really do hope that someday she grows to love herself for the fab person she is, and quits verbally assaulting those who truly love her.

Nah, the cunt can go fuck off for all I care.

Yours,

Indie
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Old 07-03-2013, 01:45 PM   #893
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Dear Laurel

It seems like Indie must use you as a go-between in this thread so can you tell him he's a simple minded cunt and I hope his beard spontaneously combusts whilst he's sleeping.

Yours darkly

Fata
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Old 07-03-2013, 01:48 PM   #894
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Dear Fata,

Look, if you want to sit your cunt on my face and feel my beard against your thighs, all you have to do is ask. Just quit beating around the bush and give into your desires.

Was that direct enough for you, you fucking thick ass cunt?

Yours,

Indie
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Old 07-03-2013, 02:14 PM   #895
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Dear Laurel,

I don't like the word cunt, it just sounds wrong, why not something pretty and descriptive like flower?

As she read his message and remembered their previous encounter, her flower opened and swelled slightly while drops of dew began to appear.
She then thought darn! I can't be having these thoughts now, and I don't want to have to take another shower

Something like that perhaps?

Yours in gentrifying the language of sex,

Gentle Noor
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Byron's Wake and Super Cool Threads.

I did feel like Icarus-Byron in Exile

Quote:
Posted by Byron In Exile 05-30-2014
Quote:
Originally Posted by Noor
all that and a bag of chips
She sent me that in the mail.
"He felt you, and he took you with him everywhere. I think he took part of you with him to wherever he is now. That's part of why it hurts so much." Phelia on Byron to me.

"Love is not love
Which altereth when it alteration findeth"-Shakespeare
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Old 07-03-2013, 02:15 PM   #896
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Dear Indie

Fuck off and die you annoying swollen flower.

Yours

Fata
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Old 07-03-2013, 02:16 PM   #897
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Noor View Post
Dear Laurel,

I don't like the word cunt, it just sounds wrong, why not something pretty and descriptive like flower?

As she read his message and remembered their previous encounter, her flower opened and swelled slightly while drops of dew began to appear.
She then thought darn! I can't be having these thoughts now, and I don't want to have to take another shower

Something like that perhaps?

Yours in gentrifying the language of sex,

Gentle Noor
Dear Noor,

I endorse this sentiment.

Yours in agreement,

No c--t.
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Old 07-03-2013, 02:17 PM   #898
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Originally Posted by Fata Morgana View Post
Dear Indie

Fuck off and die you annoying swollen flower.

Yours

Fata
It works!
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5th of Tamuz

Byron's Wake and Super Cool Threads.

I did feel like Icarus-Byron in Exile

Quote:
Posted by Byron In Exile 05-30-2014
Quote:
Originally Posted by Noor
all that and a bag of chips
She sent me that in the mail.
"He felt you, and he took you with him everywhere. I think he took part of you with him to wherever he is now. That's part of why it hurts so much." Phelia on Byron to me.

"Love is not love
Which altereth when it alteration findeth"-Shakespeare
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Old 07-03-2013, 02:24 PM   #899
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Dear Noor,

I endorse this sentiment.

Yours in agreement,

No c--t.
A flower revolution!


You know it's right
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5th of Tamuz

Byron's Wake and Super Cool Threads.

I did feel like Icarus-Byron in Exile

Quote:
Posted by Byron In Exile 05-30-2014
Quote:
Originally Posted by Noor
all that and a bag of chips
She sent me that in the mail.
"He felt you, and he took you with him everywhere. I think he took part of you with him to wherever he is now. That's part of why it hurts so much." Phelia on Byron to me.

"Love is not love
Which altereth when it alteration findeth"-Shakespeare
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Old 07-03-2013, 02:29 PM   #900
butters
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Fata Morgana View Post
Dear Indie

Fuck off and die you annoying swollen flower.

Yours

Fata
ok, i larfed

you two are so sweet.

p.s

dear everyone

sometimes the word 'cunt' is the only one that'll do

and i had to check i was in the right thread just then

yours,

utterlybutters
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