Old 02-15-2013, 11:04 AM   #1
twelveoone
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Bite me

Bite me
where the blood flows most
Vampirella
See the white mix with the red
I supposes
it's like the War of the Roses
when you give me head
So bite me
'till I give up
...the ghost
So bite me
'till I'm dead

and on a completely different note...

Ogden Nash
made a wad of cash
almost a fuckin ton...
Now isn't rhyming fun?

let me rephrase that...

Now isn't rhyming fun!!????
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Old 02-15-2013, 01:21 PM   #2
Tristesse2
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*shudders*
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Old 02-15-2013, 03:25 PM   #3
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'sall petals and pricks -
wet stuff
simply not enough
in the huff and gruff
slip and slap
the sweaty buff
and ornamental
flick chicks
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poetry submissions


What strange machinery lies between her ears
HarryHill


'tender hearted...
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Old 02-16-2013, 05:49 PM   #4
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tristesse2 View Post
*shudders*
did you see the ad in the front for sexy vampires?

what next

I vant to suck your
toes
and lick your shews

OMG Veronica we have a shrew licker in here

That's shoes, Betty, quick throw him your shoes and lets gtf out of here

Do you think that if I rubbed my feet with garlic...but he looks Italian...

That's Reggie, he just looks Italian, but he has changed since he was bitten by a vampire vole. Now if he bites your toe, you'll be suckin toes and lickin shoes forever and ever...

Excerpted from Twilight in Riverdale
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Old 02-18-2013, 07:15 PM   #5
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Under the spreading banyan tree
Shakuntala said to Shitala
life is for the birds you see

damn now what rhymes with Shitala
nbd, now mr. here is the scary part, between l2 and l3, if you didn't get it in l1, shows I know what you are doing, do you know likewise? Doubt it. Do you think my saying too much of the SOS (same old shit) gets boring, is said solely to you?
Fuck no.
Now I'm going to use that other four letter word
WORK
god, i love that dirty talk
WORK
i guess i'm just expressin myself
WORK
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Old 02-19-2013, 10:09 AM   #6
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Originally Posted by twelveoone View Post
Under the spreading banyan tree
Shakuntala said to Shitala
life is for the birds you see

damn now what rhymes with Shitala
nbd, now mr. here is the scary part, between l2 and l3, if you didn't get it in l1, shows I know what you are doing, do you know likewise? Doubt it. Do you think my saying too much of the SOS (same old shit) gets boring, is said solely to you?
Fuck no.
Now I'm going to use that other four letter word
WORK
god, i love that dirty talk
WORK
i guess i'm just expressin myself
WORK
btw
this unfinished piece of doggeral, is an example of code shifting and canceling
Shakuntala could never use that colloquialism "life is for the birds" as she was raised by birds and that is what her name means. As it turns out, in my short and variegated life I was friends with a very beautiful woman with that name, she changed the pronunciation when she came to the US.
and "spreading banyan" is an example of a redundancy so extreme that it becomes absurd.
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Old 02-21-2013, 06:11 PM   #7
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Code shifting? Oy! Went to Bing to look; there's fodder for a whole herd of poems there. n'est-ce pas?
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"Words have the power to both destroy and heal. When words are both true and kind, they can change our world."- The Budda
"I'll never be a poet" - The Harry
"You are not the whim of a careless creator, experimenting in the laboratory of life... you were made with a purpose"."-Og Mandino
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Last edited by HarryHill : 02-21-2013 at 06:17 PM.
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Old 03-02-2013, 11:27 AM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by twelveoone View Post
did you see the ad in the front for sexy vampires?

what next

I vant to suck your
toes
and lick your shews

OMG Veronica we have a shrew licker in here

That's shoes, Betty, quick throw him your shoes and lets gtf out of here

Do you think that if I rubbed my feet with garlic...but he looks Italian...

That's Reggie, he just looks Italian, but he has changed since he was bitten by a vampire vole. Now if he bites your toe, you'll be suckin toes and lickin shoes forever and ever...

Excerpted from Twilight in Riverdale
anybody see Betsy and Veronica, by Kokshur?
why am I getting sick?
Barfbarrella
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Old 03-02-2013, 11:44 AM   #9
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yeah

Quote:
Originally Posted by twelveoone View Post
anybody see Betsy and Veronica, by Kokshur?
why am I getting sick?
Barfbarrella
..
I've started to pass him by lately, or just sneak a peek to see if it's the SOS. Speaking of shit, I wrote a quick one and submitted it today after I saw your comment containing the words "A higher level of caca." Would appreciate you deficating on it tomorrow. ... (shit eating grin)
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"True glory consists in doing what deserves to be written; in writing what deserves to be read."- Pliny the Elder
"Words have the power to both destroy and heal. When words are both true and kind, they can change our world."- The Budda
"I'll never be a poet" - The Harry
"You are not the whim of a careless creator, experimenting in the laboratory of life... you were made with a purpose"."-Og Mandino
well buttered
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Old 03-02-2013, 08:16 PM   #10
twelveoone
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if he did get the idea, that is fine
what should get is the idea, he and a few others, is that the more time thinking about poetry, the better the product, also less clutter on the shelves. If I saw one thing by Mr. Shur, one thing "Betty and Veronica" it would be funny. Jokes get stale, poetry does too.
One problem is the perception of what is poetry?
Here is a definition:
It is what is beyond you.
There is always something else.
simple equation
dumb ass fuck story "poet"> dumb ass fuck story "poem"<dumb ass fuck story audience
everybody happy till the audience gets better

so you try to move to the next step,etc. etc.

passable poet>passable poetry<passable poetry audience

here is where it can get tricky, because now the poet should begin to realize there is something more, the audience may not be able to follow

he may chose to go the next level and become and "expert" and walk around with a semi sneer that you know and the audience should follow, or you accept the fact that you will never know, there will always be something beyond you. When you quit discovering, you're dead.
I question the people that somehow think they Know.
You don't, you just reached that certain level of half blindness. Are you listening?
dumb ass fuck story "poets"
Are you listening?
Ye high priests of all things linear?
You both like the smell of your own farts. If you can't discover, you're not a poet.
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Old 03-02-2013, 08:25 PM   #11
Tristesse2
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I see it as the sexual fantasies of a juvenile comic addict, it could be worse, he might be riffing on Fifty Shades of Grey.

P.S. A sense of humour helps at times like this......try doing those bloody "recommendations" without one!

Last edited by Tristesse2 : 03-02-2013 at 08:34 PM.
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Old 03-02-2013, 09:25 PM   #12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tristesse2 View Post

P.S. A sense of humour helps at times like this......try doing those bloody "recommendations" without one!
..
On a different note, T2, I really enjoyed the layout of your last recommendations (what a long ungainly word)
...
And twelve oh, you can guarantee it's all beyond me. *smirk*
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"True glory consists in doing what deserves to be written; in writing what deserves to be read."- Pliny the Elder
"Words have the power to both destroy and heal. When words are both true and kind, they can change our world."- The Budda
"I'll never be a poet" - The Harry
"You are not the whim of a careless creator, experimenting in the laboratory of life... you were made with a purpose"."-Og Mandino
well buttered
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Old 03-02-2013, 11:02 PM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tristesse2 View Post
I see it as the sexual fantasies of a juvenile comic addict, it could be worse, he might be riffing on Fifty Shades of Grey.

P.S. A sense of humour helps at times like this......try doing those bloody "recommendations" without one!
I couldn't do it, had one guy delete my comment, because he and his girlfriend had comments about that didn't like Tazz's three. I told them that at least Tazz left a name, and they should tell me what score I should give them and why-all comments gone. Hell i would have given them a 5, if they would have said something, it was short did what it had too and gone. And the thing about Mr. Shur, Betty is now Betsy, I read the third, left a comment about "Peanuts", so be prepared for the worst.

The really sad part, is I've seen some pretty amazing things, things I'll probably never see elsewhere. Buried in the dross.
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Old 03-02-2013, 11:18 PM   #14
twelveoone
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Quote:
Originally Posted by HarryHill View Post
..
I've started to pass him by lately, or just sneak a peek to see if it's the SOS. Speaking of shit, I wrote a quick one and submitted it today after I saw your comment containing the words "A higher level of caca." Would appreciate you deficating on it tomorrow. ... (shit eating grin)
sugar coating

one guy had a poem that had him jerking off (like of what possible interest?) and cum flies. I had this mental image of him then whimpering "but, I didn't know it was loaded" and then a whole host of cum flies descending and devouring his corpse. The surprising thing was it was one of the better ones. It was so offensive it took some talent to get it that way.
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Old 03-03-2013, 10:21 AM   #15
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and lo, though I walk through the valley of drek, I see editing, good stuff, some poetry

One problem is the perception of what is poetry?
Here is a definition:
It is what is beyond you.
There is always something else.
simple equation
dumb ass fuck story "poet"> dumb ass fuck story "poem"<dumb ass fuck story audience
everybody happy till the audience gets better

so you try to move to the next step,etc. etc.

passable poet>passable poetry<passable poetry audience

here is where it can get tricky, because now the poet should begin to realize there is something more, the audience may not be able to follow

he may chose to go the next level and become and "expert" and walk around with a semi sneer that you know and the audience should follow, or you accept the fact that you will never know, there will always be something beyond you. When you quit discovering, you're dead.
I question the people that somehow think they Know.
You don't, you just reached that certain level of half blindness. Are you listening?
dumb ass fuck story "poets"
Are you listening?
Ye high priests of all things linear?

You both like the smell of your own farts. If you can't discover, you're not a poet.

and a curious lack of experts
read me b...,T?
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Old 03-03-2013, 10:50 AM   #16
bogusagain
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Good poetry bores me.

Exceptional poetry entertains me.

Bad poetry excites me.
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Old 03-03-2013, 10:57 AM   #17
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Damn.

You must be in a state of perpetual tumescence around here.

::
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Old 03-03-2013, 12:11 PM   #18
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It's surprising how many good ideas one can get from the accidental genius of bad poetry. Hell, Picasso did it all the time with painting, as did the German expressionists and then again the neo-expressionists of the 80s. Poetry seems to have an establishment that seems to resist any innovation away from fossilised academism.
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Old 03-03-2013, 01:53 PM   #19
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Hell, Picasso did it all the time with painting, as did the German expressionists and then again the neo-expressionists of the 80s..
care to elaborate
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Old 03-03-2013, 02:36 PM   #20
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Quote:
Originally Posted by twelveoone View Post
care to elaborate
..
here we go
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"Words have the power to both destroy and heal. When words are both true and kind, they can change our world."- The Budda
"I'll never be a poet" - The Harry
"You are not the whim of a careless creator, experimenting in the laboratory of life... you were made with a purpose"."-Og Mandino
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Old 03-03-2013, 03:58 PM   #21
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Quote:
Originally Posted by twelveoone View Post
care to elaborate
Once Picasso got over turgid cubism he would paint like writing a diary, just paint every day and a lot of his paintings are rubbish but out of the rubbish came gems that would never have been produced if he set out to make 'good paintings'. In his last period which baffled the critics, many of them saying the bad paintings he produced were eccentric at best and the daubs of a dying light at worst. However, when neoexpressionism hit the scene, Picasso's bad paintings started to make sense.

Of course, he was not the first artist to paint badly. Most of the canon from the impresionists onwards were hammy painters. Cezanne who had huge influence over modernism was a very hammy painter and a lousy draughtsman. In a big retrospective of his work in the 90s at the Tate London, sx of the seven galleries were apalling and could have been skipped for how good they were. Of course with Cezanne's signature on them they are too valuable for that. The show illustrated how Cezanne sarched for a style to mask his short comings and that led to his seminal work.

I'm sure there will be plenty of people who will disagree with me because they have absorbed the official line which has been plugged for the best part of 100 years now but that is to keep market prices high in my book. Picasso was never a good a painter or draughtsman as claimed, it was his destruction of painting which leads to his greatest work.

Last edited by bogusagain : 03-03-2013 at 05:10 PM.
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Old 03-03-2013, 11:12 PM   #22
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Bogus, can I get your comments on some of my paintings? http://jijjle.com/index.htm Would be especially interested in what school they fit in.
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"Words have the power to both destroy and heal. When words are both true and kind, they can change our world."- The Budda
"I'll never be a poet" - The Harry
"You are not the whim of a careless creator, experimenting in the laboratory of life... you were made with a purpose"."-Og Mandino
well buttered
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Old 03-04-2013, 04:46 AM   #23
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Quote:
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Bogus, can I get your comments on some of my paintings? http://jijjle.com/index.htm Would be especially interested in what school they fit in.
It's always difficult to tell on the internet because one can't see the subtleties in the surface or brushstrokes of a painting. Competent paintings can look bad and bad paintings can look good. Your works seem to stand up as paintings but you have to remember, context is everything in art. It is doubtful we would have heard of Picasso if he wasn't presented in a gallery and Gertrude Stein hadn't seen him, amongst others, as a way to make herself famous too. Think of how much rubbish poetry is published in books, it is always taken more seriously than better unpublished poetry by most people.

I like what you are doing, in fact your website reminded me of a Scottish artist David Shrigley who has a dead pan humour. He became well known by publishing his drawings in chap books and selling them to friends. The sales eventually got out of hand and galleries wanted him and he became affluent one assumes. You just need to decide what you are about, the message you want to get across and focus on that. You don't need a deep and meaningful message, you just need to be consistent in it, not confuse your audience. Though to be honest, I don't stick to that rule myself.

Oh, and on your website, don't explain, just do. If you were a different type of artist I might say the opposite. Intrigue and entertain your audience, don't bore them by spelling things out, they will find their own meanings. And success! I think you have a good base to build on but be consistent with your message. (you don't have to articulate it in words!!!)

Last edited by bogusagain : 03-04-2013 at 05:03 AM.
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Old 03-04-2013, 08:49 AM   #24
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BTW Harry. I would write your poems and dialog by hand like this (second image down) and then upload it. Far more effective and because you are involved with images and text, your work will be taken more seriously. Stupid I know but even as an artist, you have to consider these silly conventions and how work is perceived.
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Old 03-04-2013, 09:48 PM   #25
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you have to consider these silly conventions and how work is perceived.
anyway, I saw a quote by Whistler that totally changed the perspective on one of your poems. I guess I'll to go trot of and find that book. Cubism was important as Imagism in poetry, as in lets rethink things a little.
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