The Author's Hangout Vending Machine

[Saxon_Hart]

Originally Posted by NekoParks

and you get <drum roll> a master baiter... (say that three times)

(You are so evil, Tio. I love you.)

I put in acrocephalic. . .

but it spears the master baiter.


I put in three pennies and a five year old coupon to Wendy's.

[Handley_Page]

Originally Posted by Saxon_Hart

but it spears the master baiter.

I put in three pennies and a five year old coupon to Wendy's.

But Wendy is no longer there.


I put in a dead cable.

[NekoParks]

Originally Posted by Handley_Page

But Wendy is no longer there.


I put in a dead cable.

and AAA comes to jump my battery...

I pop in the Pillsbury Dough Boy. . .

[Handley_Page]

Originally Posted by NekoParks

and AAA comes to jump my battery...

I pop in the Pillsbury Dough Boy. . .

But Zool's gatekeeper is busy elsewhere



I put in a large dollop of ice cream

[Saxon_Hart]

Originally Posted by Handley_Page

But Zool's gatekeeper is busy elsewhere



I put in a large dollop of ice cream

But the brain freeze is excruciating.


I put in Anne Murray.

[Handley_Page]

Originally Posted by Saxon_Hart

But the brain freeze is excruciating.


I put in Anne Murray.

Who flies away on a snowbird.



I put in a roast Chicken

[Artina Heartflash]

Originally Posted by Handley_Page

Who flies away on a snowbird.



I put in a roast Chicken

and you get an urban goose


I put in a kinky film noir movie about WW2

[Tio_Narratore]

Originally Posted by Artina Heartflash

and you get an urban goose


I put in a kinky film noir movie about WW2

and you get John Wayne in drag selling exit visas stolen from Nazi werewolves.

I put in a Greek chorus...

[Handley_Page]

Originally Posted by Tio_Narratore

and you get John Wayne in drag selling exit visas stolen from Nazi werewolves.

I put in a Greek chorus...

all moaning about the price of living.


I put in a large Bank Loan.

[Tio_Narratore]

Originally Posted by Handley_Page

all moaning about the price of living.


I put in a large Bank Loan.

and the large bank sells your debt to a shady collection agency.

I put in an advance on your paycheck...

[Handley_Page]

Originally Posted by Tio_Narratore

and the large bank sells your debt to a shady collection agency.

I put in an advance on your pay check...

Which is promptly swiped by the Tax Man.



I put in the small pile of coins one gets in result.

[Saxon_Hart]

Originally Posted by Handley_Page

Which is promptly swiped by the Tax Man.



I put in the small pile of coins one gets in result.

And your wife spends them on new shoes.


I put in an I O U for $4.00

[Handley_Page]

Originally Posted by Saxon_Hart

And your wife spends them on new shoes.


I put in an I O U for $4.00

and the Tax Man serves a Court Order for payment.



I put in a sworn affidavit.

[NekoParks]

Originally Posted by Handley_Page

and the Tax Man serves a Court Order for payment.



I put in a sworn affidavit.

and you get a green card or a visit from the INS...

I put in a writ of certiorari

[Handley_Page]

Originally Posted by NekoParks

and you get a green card or a visit from the INS...

I put in a writ of certiorari

And the Supreme Court rejects the plea.



I put in a small bomb

[NekoParks]

Originally Posted by Handley_Page

And the Supreme Court rejects the plea.



I put in a small bomb

and you get M249 SAW (Short Squad Automatic Weapon)

I toss in a Nude Bomb

[Handley_Page]

Originally Posted by NekoParks

and you get M249 SAW (Short Squad Automatic Weapon)

I toss in a Nude Bomb

And it's dressed in a bright flash



I put in a dead video remote control

[NekoParks]

Originally Posted by Handley_Page

And it's dressed in a bright flash



I put in a dead video remote control

and you get a Betamax copy of a Star Trek episode...

I put in red and black clown car...

[ms.read]

Originally Posted by NekoParks

and you get a Betamax copy of a Star Trek episode...

I put in red and black clown car...

and you get a moving squeaky toy that squirts water when you smell it.

I put in shameless desire.

[NekoParks]

Originally Posted by ms.read

and you get a moving squeaky toy that squirts water when you smell it.

I put in shameless desire.

and you get the lastest Literotica story

I put in a tacky plastic sunflower

[Saxon_Hart]

Originally Posted by NekoParks

and you get the lastest Literotica story

I put in a tacky plastic sunflower

And you get a tacky basket of tacky plastic pears.


I put in a melted Cadburry's Creme Egg.

[NekoParks]

Originally Posted by Saxon_Hart

And you get a tacky basket of tacky plastic pears.


I put in a melted Cadburry's Creme Egg.

and you get a melted clucking rabbit...

I toss in an episode of I Love Lucy . . .

[Handley_Page]

Originally Posted by NekoParks

and you get a melted clucking rabbit...

I toss in an episode of I Love Lucy . . .

And the association of psychiatrists goes on strike.



I put in a battered, cooked, Mars Bar

[NekoParks]

Originally Posted by Handley_Page

And the association of psychiatrists goes on strike.



I put in a battered, cooked, Mars Bar

and you get a reconstituted Americanized Mars Bar called the Milky Way

I put in a funeral dirge...

[Handley_Page]

Originally Posted by NekoParks

and you get a reconstituted Americanized Mars Bar called the Milky Way

I put in a funeral dirge...

And it slows down the dancing on TV.


I put in a Jazz ensemble