Is there a discrete symbol indicating someone is a submissive?

[Tryharder62]

I tried to look it up and saw the symbol for bdsm. I was wondering if there was a discrete symbol for being a submissive? All I could find was maybe " /s" but it never said clearly and I figured someone would know. Thanks.

[Stella_Omega]

You mean-- in terms of letters or glyphs? Nope.

[MichaelWest]

It might have meaning only to you, but then you wanted subtle. The most stand out symbols for submission that jump to mind would be a collar, represented by a circle, and the popular use of a letter "s". Combine them as letters to form some symbol that suggests "submissive" to those with some insight and is just meaningless to those without. Besides it might at least spark a conversation as to its meaning, letting you control how much is revealed.

[Tryharder62]

Originally Posted by Stella_Omega

You mean-- in terms of letters or glyphs? Nope.

I meant in terms of anything - symbols etc. but it didn't look like it to me either. Thanks for your info.

[Tryharder62]

Originally Posted by MichaelWest

It might have meaning only to you, but then you wanted subtle. The most stand out symbols for submission that jump to mind would be a collar, represented by a circle, and the popular use of a letter "s". Combine them as letters to form some symbol that suggests "submissive" to those with some insight and is just meaningless to those without. Besides it might at least spark a conversation as to its meaning, letting you control how much is revealed.

That is a really good idea. I just wondered about a universal symbol so others who knew of the lifestyle would possibly know.

[LauraWilling]

I was into BDSM fairly heavily when you and still enjoy some, but physically I can take what I used to as a sub. I do not know of any universal symbol that all understand. I have seen a collar with a small "s", but most common, if you are cyber chatting or reading a profile a sub will always use a lower case "s" and refer to Dom's and Masters. with capital letters. At least in my experience and I have been around it since the early 1970's in California. You might learn more about it by Googling Janus Society or Gorean culture and other BDSM disciplines I haven't looked in some tim, but there is probably a lot more info there no days.

[MichaelWest]

Originally Posted by Tryharder62

That is a really good idea. I just wondered about a universal symbol so others who knew of the lifestyle would possibly know.

Sadly I know of nothing universal, but that seems to be part of the fun.

First, I think you can find symbols used in literature or online communities that are widely known, for example the "Story of O" rin or the Gorean letter "k". But those are far from universal. So like the Story of O you devise a symbol known to those part of the "club" and by its nature suggests its meaning to the more literate, curious or suspicious.

I hope you imagine something that catches on, then we will have it!

[Stella_Omega]

Well, the most universal symbol is a collar. It's so universal, even people not in the lifestyle recognise it.

There is also the ring of "O"

[Etoile]

Dang it, beat me to mentioning the ring of O

There is also the BDSM emblem though that is any BDSM role, not just for submissives, but it is well-recognized.

[KoPilot]

I dunno, would it be kosher for a cishet to use the hanky code? Does anyone even use it anymore?

On my more boi-ish days I've always wanted to go out with S wearing matching black or dark blue handkerchiefs in our back pockets and see if anyone notices.

[SassyLadyTN]

If anyone comes up with anything on this, please pm me! "The ring of O" doesn't work on my male sub.. I would LOVE some kind of discrete symbol that worked well with male/female subs so they are easy to recognize. Might have to bring this up at the "club" and see what comes of it

I think the suggestion of a symbol consisting of a collar with the lower case s or /s is a good idea.. but not what I would call discret by any fashion. Anyone over the age of sperm would likely understand the meaning. Which is not always a good thing in the "outside world". For example, if someone is an Alpha in every other sense, but submissive only to his Mistress - everyone knowing he was "submissive" could make different situations difficult at best.

Thus far we have found simply using something that WE know is a symbol, but that no one else would guess. A chain bracelet or leather cuff, for example. A friend of mine makes her sub wear a Hello Kitty ring to events, since that is her trademark. But I prefer something more masculine on my man. However, these items are only for the two of you and/or at events where you are known. A well known symbol would be quite handy, if kept in the lifestyle.

[Bramblethorn]

Originally Posted by SassyLadyTN

A well known symbol would be quite handy, if kept in the lifestyle.

Not gonna happen. BDSM is such a wide and disparate umbrella that anything that's recognisable to all BDSMers everywhere is going to be recognisable to a lot of non-BDSMers too. Sooner or later it'll show up on a Very Special Episode of Laura Norder: Extra Titillation Unit or what-have-you, and then everybody's an "expert" :-)

I suspect any woman wearing such a symbol would need to be prepared to deal with a lot of clueless Domly Doms who equate "submissive" with "available to the Alpha Male, i.e. me."

[Bramblethorn]

Originally Posted by Stella_Omega

Well, the most universal symbol is a collar. It's so universal, even people not in the lifestyle recognise it.

Incidentally:

http://www.abc.net.au/news/2012-09-0...-moore/4250672

[Stella_Omega]

Originally Posted by Bramblethorn

Not gonna happen. BDSM is such a wide and disparate umbrella that anything that's recognisable to all BDSMers everywhere is going to be recognisable to a lot of non-BDSMers too. Sooner or later it'll show up on a Very Special Episode of Laura Norder: Extra Titillation Unit or what-have-you, and then everybody's an "expert" :-)

I suspect any woman wearing such a symbol would need to be prepared to deal with a lot of clueless Domly Doms who equate "submissive" with "available to the Alpha Male, i.e. me."

A wedding ring.

[MichaelWest]

Originally Posted by SassyLadyTN

"The ring of O" doesn't work on my male sub..

The Story of O ring as described in the book was made of iron and sounded quite heavy, perhaps even clunky. I once though that iron would be really suitable visually but perhaps not to wear daily. Iron can be treated in many ways but I am not certain it is best on the skin, so I thought of having my jeweler make a thin gold or silver band I could have inside an iron ring that I would oxidize to appear either black or rusted. I think it would work well for either gender, but perhaps very well for the masculine.

[LauraWilling]

The Triskele is the universal symbol for BDSM as long as the outer circle is gray, silver or gold, the color of metal. It is a metal circle with three curved arms coming out of the center and three holes (not dots) , one between each curved arm.

You may be interested to Google The Society of Janus (not Janus Society)and then The Submissives Guide or Guidebook, I can't remember which. Sorry. There are symbols for different disciplines, but most are local (so to speak) and as I said after being in this lifestyle for many years previously, I know of no universal symbol for a sub and being a sub, I think I would be aware of one.

[Etoile]

Originally Posted by LauraWilling

The Triskele is the universal symbol for BDSM as long as the outer circle is gray, silver or gold, the color of metal. It is a metal circle with three curved arms coming out of the center and three holes (not dots) , one between each curved arm.

This is the emblem I linked above, btw

[game_master24]

Originally Posted by ManJunk

There is however a secret handshake.

Wait what? I want a secret handshake... Hmm nope still Dom through and through.

[Primalex]

It's kinda simple.

o  o  o
   |
o  o  o
M  S  C
S  L  S

[LauraWilling]

Etoile, I thought that was what you were referring to, but wasn't quite sure, you are correct. Thanks. I was going to post a pic of it, but all I have found when I looked of a sample to use all are posted in a manny they can't be saved. I'll keep looking in case anyone is not understading my description.

[amofiga]

Originally Posted by Stella_Omega

Well, the most universal symbol is a collar. It's so universal, even people not in the lifestyle recognise it.

There is also the ring of "O"

The only issue with the collar is that there are so many "fashion" collars out there that you don't know whether it's a true statement of the wearer's bent or if it's just something that they saw in a costume jewlery store and thought looked "cool". She may know that it's something representative of a slave collar, but it's almost like she's just doing it as her own inside joke. If anyone actually questioned her about it or "hinted" about it, she could well backpedal. This was the case of someone I worked with who once wore "representative jewlery" of collar and wrist cuffs adorned with "D" rings. When I made a comment, she suddenly turned apologetic and embarrasses, saying that she was unaware of what she was implying.

[smoothboi]

I thought that it's an upward pointing arrow within a circle for owned sub male. And a dotted circle for unowned.

[Stella_Omega]

Originally Posted by amofiga

The only issue with the collar is that there are so many "fashion" collars out there that you don't know whether it's a true statement of the wearer's bent or if it's just something that they saw in a costume jewlery store and thought looked "cool". She may know that it's something representative of a slave collar, but it's almost like she's just doing it as her own inside joke. If anyone actually questioned her about it or "hinted" about it, she could well backpedal. This was the case of someone I worked with who once wore "representative jewlery" of collar and wrist cuffs adorned with "D" rings. When I made a comment, she suddenly turned apologetic and embarrasses, saying that she was unaware of what she was implying.

And... did we believe her? No, we did not...

See, it doesn't matter if it is a true statement of intent or not, it's still a recognised symbol.

[ameliajax]

Does anyone know for how long the Triskele has been a "universal" symbol of BDSM? Is it just since the "The Story of O"?

I recently got a tattoo of a triskele, but it obviously has much older meanings. In the Celtic tradition, as well as others. To me it is symbolic of the mother goddess -- it's a moon symbol. The three spirals represent the three phases of the moon, waxing, full and waning, which in turn symbolize the maiden, mother and crone.

I find it interesting that this symbol that spoke so strongly to me is also the symbol submissives wear, at least in a book. Since I lean that way myself.

Intriguing ...

[Stag of Oberon]

any symbol, be it item or glyph, has precisely as much meaning or magic as you give it.

On a slightly more constructive note; you could try wearing a bell (you naughty kitty).

"slave bells" were a middle eastern tradition i think, oddly missing from Wikipedia, but a quick image search reveals what I'm talking about; necklace, belt, bracelet or anklet with various jangly coins or bells, often with the finger loop characteristic of slave bracelets.

Or... just a slave bracelet, if you find the bells too obnoxious.

You can get dog tags custom inscribed, (at relatively inobtrusive vending machines around here) often in pretty colors, with rhinestones even; emblazoned with words like "owned," "slut," or "bitch," & tuck it away as a necklace. I used to hear/ read about things like this all the time. It's popularity may have died out a bit.