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Old 01-23-2013, 03:59 PM   #1
DeeZire
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Help with a phrase?

Fervent Christian father is paying is 18 YO daughter $200 per month to refrain from getting any tattoos. I'm calling it the "no-tattoo incentive." There's got to be a better way to phrase it. (It's incest/satire.) Due to my rapidly shrinking brain, and the limited vocabulary that goes with it, I'm having a hard time thinking up alternatives.
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Old 01-23-2013, 04:03 PM   #2
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Fervent Christian father is paying is 18 YO daughter $200 per month to refrain from getting any tattoos. I'm calling it the "no-tattoo incentive." There's got to be a better way to phrase it. (It's incest/satire.) Due to my rapidly shrinking brain, and the limited vocabulary that goes with it, I'm having a hard time thinking up alternatives.
"No-ink-incentive" sounds a little smoother to me.
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Old 01-23-2013, 04:10 PM   #3
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in Latin?

actus reus: a prohibited act
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Old 01-23-2013, 04:34 PM   #4
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"The no-no incentive"

But that could cover many things other than tattoos.
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Old 01-23-2013, 04:57 PM   #5
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Try this, daddys tit for tat deal.
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Old 01-23-2013, 05:00 PM   #6
DeeZire
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"No-ink-incentive" sounds a little smoother to me.
That is much cooler than mine, but it's supposed to be coming from the uptight Christian's POV. It's what he would call the program, not what we would call it.
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Old 01-23-2013, 05:00 PM   #7
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Originally Posted by DeeZire View Post
Fervent Christian father is paying is 18 YO daughter $200 per month to refrain from getting any tattoos. I'm calling it the "no-tattoo incentive." There's got to be a better way to phrase it. (It's incest/satire.) Due to my rapidly shrinking brain, and the limited vocabulary that goes with it, I'm having a hard time thinking up alternatives.
Your own or GinaeEvans's phrases sound the best to me.
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Old 01-23-2013, 05:09 PM   #8
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Originally Posted by DeeZire View Post
Fervent Christian father is paying is 18 YO daughter $200 per month to refrain from getting any tattoos. I'm calling it the "no-tattoo incentive." There's got to be a better way to phrase it. (It's incest/satire.) Due to my rapidly shrinking brain, and the limited vocabulary that goes with it, I'm having a hard time thinking up alternatives.
Pure skin allowance?

Bare skin allowance?

Clear skin stimulus?
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Old 01-23-2013, 05:11 PM   #9
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That is much cooler than mine, but it's supposed to be coming from the uptight Christian's POV. It's what he would call the program, not what we would call it.
Unsullied something.
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Old 01-23-2013, 05:20 PM   #10
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Unsullied something.
The Tramp Stamp Incentive?
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Old 01-23-2013, 05:24 PM   #11
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That is much cooler than mine, but it's supposed to be coming from the uptight Christian's POV. It's what he would call the program, not what we would call it.
Ah. "The Prevention of Eternal Damnation in the Pit of Fire Pension."


No, I just kid.
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Old 01-23-2013, 05:44 PM   #12
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Ah. "The Prevention of Eternal Damnation in the Pit of Fire Pension."


No, I just kid.
That's what I had in mind - a Biblical reference.

Okay, I googled. Apparently there is a Corinthians verse about the body being a temple. I can use that in the dialogue, (she's already taken the Abstinence Pledge) but it would be nice to work in a phrase that reveals his inflated sense of importance and self-righteousnes when it comes to keeping his daughter pure, (even though he's squirting his seed all over her.)
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Old 01-23-2013, 05:46 PM   #13
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Originally Posted by DeeZire View Post
That's what I had in mind - a Biblical reference.

Okay, I googled. Apparently there is a Corinthians verse about the body being a temple. I can use that in the dialogue, (she's already taken the Abstinence Pledge) but it would be nice to work in a phrase that reveals his inflated sense of importance and self-righteousnes when it comes to keeping his daughter pure, (even though he's squirting his seed all over her.)
The last which he shouldn't be doing anyway, since as a Biblically-inclined Christian, he'd surely be familiar with the story of Onan...
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Old 01-23-2013, 05:49 PM   #14
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DeeZire View Post
Fervent Christian father is paying is 18 YO daughter $200 per month to refrain from getting any tattoos. I'm calling it the "no-tattoo incentive." There's got to be a better way to phrase it. (It's incest/satire.) Due to my rapidly shrinking brain, and the limited vocabulary that goes with it, I'm having a hard time thinking up alternatives.
The Leviticus Levy?

Lev. 19:28: Ye shall not make any cuttings in your flesh for the dead, nor print any marks upon you: I am the LORD.
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Old 01-23-2013, 05:51 PM   #15
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The last which he shouldn't be doing anyway, since as a Biblically-inclined Christian, he'd surely be familiar with the story of Onan...
Perhaps , but maybe he didn't take a Lot of notice!

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Old 01-23-2013, 07:02 PM   #16
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DeeZire View Post
That's what I had in mind - a Biblical reference.

Okay, I googled. Apparently there is a Corinthians verse about the body being a temple. I can use that in the dialogue, (she's already taken the Abstinence Pledge) but it would be nice to work in a phrase that reveals his inflated sense of importance and self-righteousnes when it comes to keeping his daughter pure, (even though he's squirting his seed all over her.)
That's what I was going to recommend, the "body is a temple" phrase. Maybe the temple pledge? Temple incentive?
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Old 01-23-2013, 07:40 PM   #17
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The last which he shouldn't be doing anyway, since as a Biblically-inclined Christian, he'd surely be familiar with the story of Onan...
Like many Christians, he picks and chooses his Bible verses to suit his lifestyle.

In his internal dialogue, the guy could be referring to it as paying his Leviticus Levy. When addressing his daughter, I suppose he could call it the "Corinthians Skin Stimulus" which would tie in with the way he feels when he's checking her for tattoos.

Thanks for the suggestions.
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Old 01-23-2013, 09:00 PM   #18
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The Leviticus Levy?

Lev. 19:28: Ye shall not make any cuttings in your flesh for the dead, nor print any marks upon you: I am the LORD.
Leviticus Levy sounds good! Or how about No Graffiti on the Temple Fund.

In South Wales, tattoos on the bit of back showing at the top of trousers are called Slag Tags.
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Old 01-23-2013, 09:52 PM   #19
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Tattoo hell tithe.
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Old 01-23-2013, 09:56 PM   #20
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Leviticus Levy sounds good! Or how about No Graffiti on the Temple Fund.

In South Wales, tattoos on the bit of back showing at the top of trousers are called Slag Tags.
That's a Tramp Stamp over here
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Old 01-23-2013, 10:19 PM   #21
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The last which he shouldn't be doing anyway, since as a Biblically-inclined Christian, he'd surely be familiar with the story of Onan...
Onan was slain for practicing birth control (withdrawl). I hope the father's actions are safer sex than that.

ETA: Maybe "undefiled skin" or something like that.
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Old 01-23-2013, 11:12 PM   #22
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Onan was slain for practicing birth control (withdrawl). I hope the father's actions are safer sex than that.

ETA: Maybe "undefiled skin" or something like that.
Yes, "defiled" is a word the guy would use.

In my story, the father does not practice withdrawal. He never even sticks it in. I mean, after all, it is his daughter.

The fact that birth control is still considered a sin by some Christians proves my point about religion being an al carte offering. I find the hypocrisy, the denial of science, the propagation of hate, all very entertaining, in a tawdry sort of way.
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Old 01-23-2013, 11:17 PM   #23
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In my story, the father does not practice withdrawal. He never even sticks it in. I mean, after all, it is his daughter.
That reads like such a non sequitur to me. Did he shoot it in her mother from across the room?
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Old 01-23-2013, 11:25 PM   #24
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Onan was slain for practicing birth control (withdrawl).
He was, but it was in a very specific context. His brother Er died childless, and Onan was supposed to be providing a child for him; legally the child would've been counted as Er's.

"But Onan, knowing that the seed would not count as his, let it go to waste whenever he joined with his brother's wife, so as not to provide offspring for his brother" (possibly this would've stopped Onan from inheriting Er's estate himself? I'm not certain.) So it's not clear whether all withdrawal is forbidden, or just this particular situation.

Also, his father had ordered him to do it, and in the OT disobeying your father might be enough to get you struck down all on its own...
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Old 01-24-2013, 12:14 AM   #25
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How about the anti desecration incentive
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