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01-18-2013, 10:42 PM
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#105276
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There is no R in my name
TheeGoatPig is offline
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Northern New Jersey USA
Posts: 13,000
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MagicaPractica
That sounds ominous.
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Fucks yeah it is, for the punching bag 
I have frustrations that I need to get out of my system, and it is better to take them out on an inanimate swinging leather bag than a person. |
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01-18-2013, 10:46 PM
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#105277
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There is no R in my name
TheeGoatPig is offline
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Northern New Jersey USA
Posts: 13,000
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Plus, I am a true heavyweight, and I send that 80 pound fucker swinging up near the ceiling sometimes  |
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01-19-2013, 02:34 PM
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#105278
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Baleful
steve44uk is offline
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: UK
Posts: 4,128
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Yesterday, as I drove to work, I pulled up at a set of traffic lights, alongside an abandoned double-headed dildo in the road.
You're welcome.
__________________
My stories
My AH Directory entry.
Dianthus: "You're incorrigible. I like that in a friend..."
"Everything in excess! To enjoy the flavor of life, take big bites. Moderation is for monks." - Lazarus Long
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01-19-2013, 05:51 PM
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#105279
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Draco interdum Vincit
Handley_Page is offline
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: UK
Posts: 55,794
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Quote:
Originally Posted by steve44uk
Yesterday, as I drove to work, I pulled up at a set of traffic lights, alongside an abandoned double-headed dildo in the road.
You're welcome.
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Did you tell the Dildo rescue organisation ?
__________________
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If it ain't broke, don't fix it.
Handley Page
Incident at Cemetery Junction.
" Pest Control."
" Mavis's Car Trip."
" Norman-the-dragon. "
" Stacy & the Angel. "
" Earth Tremor on Stage ? "
" Charlie's Story. "
" How to do Audio. "
http://www.literotica.com/stories/me...php?uid=883259
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01-20-2013, 02:44 AM
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#105280
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Honourable Slut
NaokoSmith is offline
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: In your dreams
Posts: 9,891
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Quote:
Originally Posted by steve44uk
Yesterday, as I drove to work, I pulled up at a set of traffic lights, alongside an abandoned double-headed dildo in the road.
You're welcome.
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That poor dildo, abandoned in the snow! Waiting for its backstory to be told, perhaps ....
TheeGoatPig, good to see you getting out and about. Hit that punchbag hard! 
 
__________________
Just like one of the lads, really. (With tits .)
Submission. I mean my submissions.
Only one man in a thousand is a leader of men -- the other nine hundred and ninety-nine follow women. - Groucho Marx.
You can follow me on my review blog: Feminist Erotica
Sweet dreams are made of this. Who am I to disagree? I travel the world and the seven seas.
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01-20-2013, 02:46 AM
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#105281
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Baleful
steve44uk is offline
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: UK
Posts: 4,128
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NaokoSmith
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You're spot on, Naoko, it was the backstory that occupied my mind for the rest of the drive...
HP - let me have their number and I'll redress my omission...
__________________
My stories
My AH Directory entry.
Dianthus: "You're incorrigible. I like that in a friend..."
"Everything in excess! To enjoy the flavor of life, take big bites. Moderation is for monks." - Lazarus Long
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01-20-2013, 02:58 AM
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#105282
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Honourable Slut
NaokoSmith is offline
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: In your dreams
Posts: 9,891
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Quote:
Originally Posted by steve44uk
You're spot on, Naoko, it was the backstory that occupied my mind for the rest of the drive...
HP - let me have their number and I'll redress my omission...
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It had spots on! It really needs its story told.
Oh whoops, wrong thread, back to Things You Don't Want to Hear During Sex ... oh no, the little creature I don't want to hear while on this site is pitter-pattering down the stairs calling plaintively for its breakfast ....
__________________
Just like one of the lads, really. (With tits .)
Submission. I mean my submissions.
Only one man in a thousand is a leader of men -- the other nine hundred and ninety-nine follow women. - Groucho Marx.
You can follow me on my review blog: Feminist Erotica
Sweet dreams are made of this. Who am I to disagree? I travel the world and the seven seas.
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01-20-2013, 03:05 AM
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#105283
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Baleful
steve44uk is offline
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: UK
Posts: 4,128
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NaokoSmith
It had spots on! It really needs its story told.
Oh whoops, wrong thread, back to Things You Don't Want to Hear During Sex ... oh no, the little creature I don't want to hear while on this site is pitter-pattering down the stairs calling plaintively for its breakfast ....
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Ha! I have two here, but Scooby Doo's occupying their attention for the moment.
Hey, maybe this is the inspiration I need for my Valentine's story submission. I may have to lose the spots, though...
__________________
My stories
My AH Directory entry.
Dianthus: "You're incorrigible. I like that in a friend..."
"Everything in excess! To enjoy the flavor of life, take big bites. Moderation is for monks." - Lazarus Long
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01-20-2013, 04:03 AM
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#105284
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Honourable Slut
NaokoSmith is offline
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: In your dreams
Posts: 9,891
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Quote:
Originally Posted by steve44uk
Ha! I have two here, but Scooby Doo's occupying their attention for the moment.
Hey, maybe this is the inspiration I need for my Valentine's story submission. I may have to lose the spots, though... |
The double-ended dildo that found love at last! It's a winner! Maybe it could have decorative knobbly spots?
I have two today too. I begged one from another MILF. If there's one they come and whine in your ear and you have to slam your netbook shut; if they have a friend they go off and put Avengers Assemble in the Blu-ray player themselves although I find I have to wipe the jam off the DVD next time I want to watch it with my fella.
__________________
Just like one of the lads, really. (With tits .)
Submission. I mean my submissions.
Only one man in a thousand is a leader of men -- the other nine hundred and ninety-nine follow women. - Groucho Marx.
You can follow me on my review blog: Feminist Erotica
Sweet dreams are made of this. Who am I to disagree? I travel the world and the seven seas.
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01-20-2013, 04:14 AM
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#105285
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Baleful
steve44uk is offline
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: UK
Posts: 4,128
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NaokoSmith
The double-ended dildo that found love at last! It's a winner! Maybe it could have decorative knobbly spots?
I have two today too. I begged one from another MILF. If there's one they come and whine in your ear and you have to slam your netbook shut; if they have a friend they go off and put Avengers Assemble in the Blu-ray player themselves although I find I have to wipe the jam off the DVD next time I want to watch it with my fella.
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I have a title: 'The Double-Ended Dildo Who Could...' A tale of love, lust, perseverance an abandonment.
Hell, if these two were old enough, I'd be watching Avengers Assemble with them myself! The only one I could watch it with is my eldest who, in characteristic teenage style, is still spark out upstairs. 
__________________
My stories
My AH Directory entry.
Dianthus: "You're incorrigible. I like that in a friend..."
"Everything in excess! To enjoy the flavor of life, take big bites. Moderation is for monks." - Lazarus Long
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01-20-2013, 04:47 AM
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#105286
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Draco interdum Vincit
Handley_Page is offline
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: UK
Posts: 55,794
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Quote:
Originally Posted by steve44uk
I have a title: 'The Double-Ended Dildo Who Could...' A tale of love, lust, perseverance an abandonment.
Hell, if these two were old enough, I'd be watching Avengers Assemble with them myself! The only one I could watch it with is my eldest who, in characteristic teenage style, is still spark out upstairs. |
Ah - I remember those day well. That said, we didn't have the internet then.
"Double ender; the Pushme-Pullyou story"
__________________
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If it ain't broke, don't fix it.
Handley Page
Incident at Cemetery Junction.
" Pest Control."
" Mavis's Car Trip."
" Norman-the-dragon. "
" Stacy & the Angel. "
" Earth Tremor on Stage ? "
" Charlie's Story. "
" How to do Audio. "
http://www.literotica.com/stories/me...php?uid=883259
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01-20-2013, 04:57 AM
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#105287
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Baleful
steve44uk is offline
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: UK
Posts: 4,128
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Handley_Page
"Double ender; the Pushme-Pullyou story"
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Bahahahaha!
__________________
My stories
My AH Directory entry.
Dianthus: "You're incorrigible. I like that in a friend..."
"Everything in excess! To enjoy the flavor of life, take big bites. Moderation is for monks." - Lazarus Long
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01-20-2013, 07:02 AM
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#105288
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Honourable Slut
NaokoSmith is offline
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: In your dreams
Posts: 9,891
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Handley_Page
Ah - I remember those day well. That said, we didn't have the internet then.
"Double ender; the Pushme-Pullyou story"
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Snork! You could do that one, since the pushmi-pullyu is a fabulous beast.
I am looking forward to the peaceful mornings when the hormones hit the heights of teenage torment.
__________________
Just like one of the lads, really. (With tits .)
Submission. I mean my submissions.
Only one man in a thousand is a leader of men -- the other nine hundred and ninety-nine follow women. - Groucho Marx.
You can follow me on my review blog: Feminist Erotica
Sweet dreams are made of this. Who am I to disagree? I travel the world and the seven seas.
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01-20-2013, 07:14 AM
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#105289
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Baleful
steve44uk is offline
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: UK
Posts: 4,128
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NaokoSmith
Snork! You could do that one, since the pushmi-pullyu is a fabulous beast.
I am looking forward to the peaceful mornings when the hormones hit the heights of teenage torment.
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At that point, Naoko, you need those few hours of teenage narcolepsy to regroup before the next battle over... well, anything, really...
HP's totally getting a namecheck if I do write it...
__________________
My stories
My AH Directory entry.
Dianthus: "You're incorrigible. I like that in a friend..."
"Everything in excess! To enjoy the flavor of life, take big bites. Moderation is for monks." - Lazarus Long
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01-20-2013, 07:37 AM
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#105290
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Draco interdum Vincit
Handley_Page is offline
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: UK
Posts: 55,794
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Quote:
Originally Posted by steve44uk
At that point, Naoko, you need those few hours of teenage narcolepsy to regroup before the next battle over... well, anything, really...
HP's totally getting a namecheck if I do write it... |
Thank you. I look forward to reading it.
And the phone number is 111000111
__________________
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If it ain't broke, don't fix it.
Handley Page
Incident at Cemetery Junction.
" Pest Control."
" Mavis's Car Trip."
" Norman-the-dragon. "
" Stacy & the Angel. "
" Earth Tremor on Stage ? "
" Charlie's Story. "
" How to do Audio. "
http://www.literotica.com/stories/me...php?uid=883259
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01-20-2013, 07:43 AM
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#105291
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Baleful
steve44uk is offline
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: UK
Posts: 4,128
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Handley_Page
Thank you. I look forward to reading it.
And the phone number is 111000111
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...
__________________
My stories
My AH Directory entry.
Dianthus: "You're incorrigible. I like that in a friend..."
"Everything in excess! To enjoy the flavor of life, take big bites. Moderation is for monks." - Lazarus Long
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01-20-2013, 11:19 AM
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#105292
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Literotica Guru
_Lynn_ is offline
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Somewhere, USA
Posts: 47,958
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Stupid weather. 47 yesterday. 19 today.  |
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01-20-2013, 12:44 PM
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#105293
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Honourable Slut
NaokoSmith is offline
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: In your dreams
Posts: 9,891
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Quote:
Originally Posted by steve44uk
At that point, Naoko, you need those few hours of teenage narcolepsy to regroup before the next battle over... well, anything, really...
HP's totally getting a namecheck if I do write it... |
I've already got battles over everything and mine is only 8! It can't get worse, no no, what have I done! Aaaagh! Too late for safe sex now.
(Oh yes, that banana certainly had a dance!)
__________________
Just like one of the lads, really. (With tits .)
Submission. I mean my submissions.
Only one man in a thousand is a leader of men -- the other nine hundred and ninety-nine follow women. - Groucho Marx.
You can follow me on my review blog: Feminist Erotica
Sweet dreams are made of this. Who am I to disagree? I travel the world and the seven seas.
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01-20-2013, 12:49 PM
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#105294
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Baleful
steve44uk is offline
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: UK
Posts: 4,128
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NaokoSmith
It can't get worse,
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Oh, you poor, sweet, innocent thing...
So tell me, how long have you had this fixation with sausages and dancing bananas...? 
__________________
My stories
My AH Directory entry.
Dianthus: "You're incorrigible. I like that in a friend..."
"Everything in excess! To enjoy the flavor of life, take big bites. Moderation is for monks." - Lazarus Long
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01-20-2013, 02:27 PM
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#105295
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Literotica Guru
_Lynn_ is offline
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Somewhere, USA
Posts: 47,958
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NaokoSmith
I've already got battles over everything and mine is only 8! It can't get worse, no no, what have I done! Aaaagh! Too late for safe sex now.
(Oh yes, that banana certainly had a dance!) |
8? 8?? My grandson is older than that!  |
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01-20-2013, 03:43 PM
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#105296
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Honourable Slut
NaokoSmith is offline
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: In your dreams
Posts: 9,891
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MistressLynn
8? 8?? My grandson is older than that! |
I keep saying, I am an AGING MILF. I'm really too old to be kicking back cubs - get off! ROFL (I packed in rather a lot of life before becoming a parent.)
Quote:
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Hell, if these two were old enough, I'd be watching Avengers Assemble with them myself! The only one I could watch it with is my eldest who, in characteristic teenage style, is still spark out upstairs.
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After watching it for the fifth time in 3 days, it palls a bit but the Piglet suggested it as our film to watch while having Sunday tea. Actually, she does have good taste sometimes! I feel it's such a great opportunity, too, for her to improve her vocabulary. "You mewling quim" is something I think will significantly enhance her playground banter.
I hope I don't get drummed off the board for this outrageous preference, but I do have a secret liking for Loki! I mean, in the scene where he's wearing the suit. Ooh, and with a white cotton shirt! and when he says: If you don't mind, I'll have that drink now. ROFLOL! I'm sure he's a single malt man. Er, I mean God.
Although The Director's sidekick is kind of a hot chick too. Oh dear, life is so difficult when oranges are not your only fruit!
(Get off, cub, go away!)
__________________
Just like one of the lads, really. (With tits .)
Submission. I mean my submissions.
Only one man in a thousand is a leader of men -- the other nine hundred and ninety-nine follow women. - Groucho Marx.
You can follow me on my review blog: Feminist Erotica
Sweet dreams are made of this. Who am I to disagree? I travel the world and the seven seas.
Last edited by NaokoSmith : 01-20-2013 at 03:48 PM.
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01-20-2013, 03:47 PM
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#105297
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Honourable Slut
NaokoSmith is offline
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: In your dreams
Posts: 9,891
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Quote:
Originally Posted by steve44uk
Oh, you poor, sweet, innocent thing...
So tell me, how long have you had this fixation with sausages and dancing bananas...? |
Oh sorry, the bananas. It was kind of a New Year's Resolution. I said I would seek ever more inventive ways of using them. Although I still think I won't be able to better the one in the thread about large penises, in which we were arguing that instead of being a size queen, it might be fun to write a story with a dancing penis singing the Star Spangled Banana. And Neko said that made her split her sides.
__________________
Just like one of the lads, really. (With tits .)
Submission. I mean my submissions.
Only one man in a thousand is a leader of men -- the other nine hundred and ninety-nine follow women. - Groucho Marx.
You can follow me on my review blog: Feminist Erotica
Sweet dreams are made of this. Who am I to disagree? I travel the world and the seven seas.
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01-20-2013, 04:38 PM
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#105298
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Literotica Guru
_Lynn_ is offline
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Somewhere, USA
Posts: 47,958
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NaokoSmith
I keep saying, I am an AGING MILF. I'm really too old to be kicking back cubs - get off! ROFL (I packed in rather a lot of life before becoming a parent.)
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Whereas I started at seventeen . . . |
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01-20-2013, 04:51 PM
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#105299
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Draco interdum Vincit
Handley_Page is offline
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: UK
Posts: 55,794
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MistressLynn
Whereas I started at seventeen . . .
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You're obviously the right age to be a MILF, then.
Come to think of it, I just realised I have 9-year old great grand-daughter [oh terrors !]
__________________
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If it ain't broke, don't fix it.
Handley Page
Incident at Cemetery Junction.
" Pest Control."
" Mavis's Car Trip."
" Norman-the-dragon. "
" Stacy & the Angel. "
" Earth Tremor on Stage ? "
" Charlie's Story. "
" How to do Audio. "
http://www.literotica.com/stories/me...php?uid=883259
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01-20-2013, 10:53 PM
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#105300
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good little witch.
glynndah is offline
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Floating around in my sparkly bubble
Posts: 27,012
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I have a palindromic post coming up. I hope I don't squander it on something frivolous.
__________________
"When did I go from the good little witch to the not good enough for you little witch?"
"If you could read my mind, love, what a tale my thoughts could tell."
"A picture may be worth a thousand words, but sometimes just a few carefully chosen words can inspire thousands of pictures."
"My! People come and go so quickly here!"
“Technically, a witch is always a lady, except when circumstances dictate otherwise.”
"A from a good witch brings a week of good luck!"
The good little witch writes naughty things.
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