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View Poll Results: Ladies: Did you keep your maiden name after marrying?
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Yes.
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2 |
7.41% |
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No.
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16 |
59.26% |
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I'm a dude, and I just wanted to vote on SOMEthing.
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9 |
33.33% |
01-17-2013, 12:24 AM
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#1
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wandering
McKenna is offline
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: Northwest, USA
Posts: 15,647
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Ladies: Did you keep your maiden name after marrying?
Why or why not?
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01-17-2013, 12:24 AM
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#2
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The Usual.
LiFeNdEaTh is offline
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: LOVE JESUS & DANCE WIT THE DEVIL
Posts: 21,265
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i will never get married.. fuck that
but let's say i do.. i would like my partner to do so
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01-17-2013, 12:25 AM
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#3
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wandering
McKenna is offline
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: Northwest, USA
Posts: 15,647
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LiFeNdEaTh
i will never get married.. fuck that
but let's say i do.. i would like my partner to do so
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Why?
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01-17-2013, 12:26 AM
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#4
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The Usual.
LiFeNdEaTh is offline
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: LOVE JESUS & DANCE WIT THE DEVIL
Posts: 21,265
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Quote:
Originally Posted by McKenna
Why?
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why? fuck that shit.. if i spent all that money on her ring an wedding etc.. she better.. hahah
maybe that's just me.. |
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01-17-2013, 12:26 AM
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#5
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I'm a girl!
Tryharder62 is offline
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: La-la land!
Posts: 9,009
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I took my husband's name.
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01-17-2013, 12:26 AM
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#6
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Cat Lover
LadyVer is offline
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Ridunculous
Posts: 16,189
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No. Married name was shorter and it was during the Stone Age.
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01-17-2013, 12:27 AM
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#7
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The Usual.
LiFeNdEaTh is offline
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: LOVE JESUS & DANCE WIT THE DEVIL
Posts: 21,265
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LadyVer
No. Married name was shorter and it was during the Stone Age.
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01-17-2013, 12:28 AM
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#8
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Cat Lover
LadyVer is offline
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Ridunculous
Posts: 16,189
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LiFeNdEaTh
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01-17-2013, 12:29 AM
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#9
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Literotica Guru
GinaeEvans is offline
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: It varies throughout the day.
Posts: 679
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I would take my husband's name. It's not like your maiden name would vanish. If the marriage ended, you can always take it back. Plus, there's the option to hyphenate your last name.
__________________
I don't cyber, guys. I'm here to write and socialize. Sorry.
I don't dislike you. I nothing you. I am a cunning linguist.
"Will you step into my parlor?" said the spider to the fly.
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01-17-2013, 12:30 AM
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#10
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wandering
McKenna is offline
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: Northwest, USA
Posts: 15,647
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LiFeNdEaTh
why? fuck that shit.. if i spent all that money on her ring an wedding etc.. she better.. hahah
maybe that's just me..
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What if she doesn't want a ring? Or buys her own? Or goes 50/50 with you?
What if instead of a big, elaborate wedding, you put the money down on a house?
Just trying to understand the mindset. I know some women who've kept their maiden names, and some who haven't. |
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01-17-2013, 12:31 AM
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#11
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The Usual.
LiFeNdEaTh is offline
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: LOVE JESUS & DANCE WIT THE DEVIL
Posts: 21,265
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Quote:
Originally Posted by GinaeEvans
I would take my husband's name. It's not like your maiden name would vanish. If the marriage ended, you can always take it back. Plus, there's the option to hyphenate your last name.
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exactly.. |
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01-17-2013, 12:32 AM
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#12
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wandering
McKenna is offline
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: Northwest, USA
Posts: 15,647
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Quote:
Originally Posted by GinaeEvans
I would take my husband's name. It's not like your maiden name would vanish. If the marriage ended, you can always take it back. Plus, there's the option to hyphenate your last name.
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Damnit. When I was thinking about this earlier, I meant to include an option to hyphenate. |
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01-17-2013, 01:01 AM
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#13
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wandering
McKenna is offline
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: Northwest, USA
Posts: 15,647
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I kept my maiden name, but mostly by accident (at the time of our wedding). Something about needing to file separate papers at the consulate; in the country I was married in, women don't automatically take their husband's name upon marrying (as I understand it). By the time we realized we needed to file more paperwork, it was too late to do anything before the wedding.
I thought about filing the proper papers a few months after we were married, but it just never seemed important to either of us. I thought about doing a legal name change when my son was born, but again, it just didn't seem right to either of us.
It's been interesting to hear people's reactions to the fact I kept my maiden name; some have been downright rude. People assume so much when they know so little.
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01-17-2013, 01:51 AM
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#14
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Queen of Geeks
satindesire is offline
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: One does not simply QWOP into Mordor
Posts: 13,130
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I took his name because I really liked the way my name sounded with his last name attached to it.
Is that a silly reason? Probably so, I'm pretty sure...but I did it for love.  |
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01-17-2013, 01:52 AM
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#15
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Literotica Guru
shoulderblade is offline
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: SW Ontario
Posts: 7,377
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Quote:
Originally Posted by GinaeEvans
I would take my husband's name. It's not like your maiden name would vanish. If the marriage ended, you can always take it back. Plus, there's the option to hyphenate your last name.
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Thing is that hyphenation is a little awkward in length and really cannot go on for generations. Also is reminiscent of the British Royal Family (???) and sounds vaguely indecisive.
On the other hand keeping the maiden name is neat and direct but does indicate the marriage via the names.
Looks to me like there is no clear "right choice" here so people just go with the flow. |
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01-17-2013, 01:55 AM
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#16
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Literotica Guru
GinaeEvans is offline
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: It varies throughout the day.
Posts: 679
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Quote:
Originally Posted by shoulderblade
Thing is that hyphenation is a little awkward in length and really cannot go on for generations. Also is reminiscent of the British Royal Family (???) and sounds vaguely indecisive.
On the other hand keeping the maiden name is neat and direct but does indicate the marriage via the names.
Looks to me like there is no clear "right choice" here so people just go with the flow.
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Oh, I don't know. Mrs. Petronella Evangeline Holmes-Sherbert-Kingsley-Knight-Shepard-Williams-Smith-Jones-Doe has a certain ring to it.
__________________
I don't cyber, guys. I'm here to write and socialize. Sorry.
I don't dislike you. I nothing you. I am a cunning linguist.
"Will you step into my parlor?" said the spider to the fly.
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01-17-2013, 02:04 AM
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#17
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* der Weisheit
dutchrain is offline
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Still in the same place
Posts: 11,583
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I chanced my last name, had too, keeping the maiden name was no legal option.
A nice bonus was going from the most common last name in the country I was born in, to a quit unique one.
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01-17-2013, 02:34 AM
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#18
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Literotica Guru
shoulderblade is offline
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: SW Ontario
Posts: 7,377
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Quote:
Originally Posted by GinaeEvans
Oh, I don't know. Mrs. Petronella Evangeline Holmes-Sherbert-Kingsley-Knight-Shepard-Williams-Smith-Jones-Doe has a certain ring to it.
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Sure. But try signing it on a cheque or document.  |
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01-17-2013, 02:46 AM
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#19
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Uh...
KRCummings is offline
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: I dunno
Posts: 76,616
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Of course I changed my name. It's part of marriage and I'm not an idiot who thinks a name really means a whole lot.
__________________
"Attempted murder, I ask you, what is that? Do they give a Nobel Prize for attempted chemistry?"
-Sideshow Bob
"Early in life I had to choose between honest arrogance and hypocritical humility. I chose the former and have seen no reason to change"
"An architect's most useful tools are an eraser at the drafting board, and a wrecking bar at the site"
-Frank Lloyd Wright
Autism Speaks. Are you listening?
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01-17-2013, 03:03 AM
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#20
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Literotica Guru
dirtwrench is offline
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Iowa, USA
Posts: 1,756
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My wife gave up her maiden name & took my last name.
Pretty sure there have been times over the last 2+ decades she wondered if either one was the smart thing to do. Marrying me or taking my name.
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01-17-2013, 03:03 AM
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#21
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Frederick Fucking Chopin
Byron In Exile is offline
Join Date: May 2002
Location: Don't let the sun burn a hole in your ass, William Blake: rise now, and drive your cart and plow over the bones of the dead!
Posts: 71,876
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dutchrain
I chanced my last name, had too, keeping the maiden name was no legal option.
A nice bonus was going from the most common last name in the country I was born in, to a quit unique one.
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__________________
I am but mad north-north-west:
When the wind is southerly I know a hawk from a handsaw.
In the High School halls
In the shopping malls
Conform or be cast out
In the basement bars
In the backs of cars
Be cool or be cast out
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01-17-2013, 03:21 AM
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#22
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.
Aquagal is offline
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Where it's cold
Posts: 26,290
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dutchrain
I chanced my last name, had too, keeping the maiden name was no legal option.
A nice bonus was going from the most common last name in the country I was born in, to a quit unique one.
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I did just the opposite. Losing my very Latino and hard to pronounce name, to quite a common one. |
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01-17-2013, 05:35 AM
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#23
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bunny lover
lovetoread is offline
Join Date: Mar 2001
Location: Joisey
Posts: 38,210
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I took his.
The funny thing is for months afterwards, whenever I was called by it, I didn't realize that they were talking to me and he got peeved. That was funny.
I kept the last name after, mainly cause it was the kids last name and it pissed the new wife off to not be the only Mrs.
__________________
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01-17-2013, 07:31 AM
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#24
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Ancient writer
oggbashan is offline
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: Facing the sea.
Posts: 29,271
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One of my names is a grandmothers' maiden name. That helped when I started family history research, even if it is inconvenient to have four names. Other male members of the family have perpetuated the grandfather, great-grandfather, and great-great-grandfather's (and so on) Christian name, but as the younger son of a younger son I didn't need to.
I have three daughters. One is unmarried so still has my surname. One used her maiden name as her professional name until she changed employers and needed a new start.
The youngest, an MD, has kept her maiden name for professional purposes and added my surname as a additional Christian name to her full married name. She is married to a medical Ph.D so it is convenient that he is Doctor X and she is Doctor Y.
Socially they are Doctor (his Christian name) and Doctor (her Christian name). At work they use their separate surnames as listed in professional registers but she is often called "Doctor Cake". She gets given too much cake and sometimes she has to take drastic measures to exercise away the consequences.
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01-17-2013, 11:15 AM
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#25
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AKA Bean
chillywilly2 is offline
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Great White North
Posts: 12,066
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My wife took my name...Its the proper way and I think it helps to keep them in line.
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