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Old 07-29-2003, 11:12 PM   #26
BlueSugar
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Or he walks in on me while I'm dressing...or showering...and within seconds, he's slammed into me, with his hand over my mouth to keep me from screaming. Sudden, with no warning.
-snip sheath-


Sometimes are the best ones of the week start like this for me too.

We also in the beginning of the relationship (in the beginning of every relationship I was/will get into) when the time is right I clearly clearly state what would be too much and the things to not do ever or he will be castraited with a rusty dull spoon. THough, in the heat of the moment once or twice the "not ok ever" things, I found myself hearing echoing off the walls back at me in my own voice .... when you just start out, testing the waters of what you like -so to say- safewords and reasurances are great and needed, (this also applies to something 'new' that you both want to try) ((research is also good, and lots of talking)) it helps build trust and skill at knowing the other persons body as well as you would know your favorite recipie or a musical instrument ...

I love to be treated and looked at as a musician's prised instrument.
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Old 07-30-2003, 12:20 AM   #27
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Hi y=mx+b -

Usually it is totally spontaneous.......although we have talked in great detail about what I like and don't like , and how i want to be "taken".....

or, i might send him an email at work , telling him what i want him to do to me...... and he walks in the door and is already in that role.... and the struggle begins....

have fun ! ...
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Old 07-30-2003, 12:24 AM   #28
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Quote:
Originally posted by BlueSugar
I love to be treated and looked at as a musician's prised instrument.
OH...wow. I love the way you put it.

S.
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Old 07-30-2003, 03:38 AM   #29
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pretty much your second quote sums it up. having a dedicated musician where music is their life, and treasuring their equiptment, naming it , keeping up care, buying them things, having mini personal rituals while cleaning or restringing, tuning, tightening, before a show, after a show, practice ...etc... and then him naming it after you. Or even letting you pick the name... thats love.

Playing you like he plays his instrument, viewing you like he views his instrument, his baby, his guitar, his kit, his woodwind, brass ...etc... that is tenderness.

I also think your story where your music man made love to his guitar... ::nods:: I was breathless... bc i totaly understood. The wording, the feelings they were genuine, they were real... I know you know how I feel so I'm going to shut up before I'm reduced to a reiterating sappy mess.
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Jackie Blue
The difference between pleasure and pain is perception.
I do not regret the things I've done, but those I did not do."
Empire Records

sometimes I can hear the heavy breathing through the PM window... makes my skin crawl.
LONG WINDOW STRETCHING SIG LINES OFFICALLY PISS ME OFF
friend: you are not responsible for our fetishes, nor for the fact that we turn to you to help us fulfill them
me: i like it. i'm the go to person no one talks about unless its whispered.



The Blank Manual...How do you like your Eggs?... My Very Own Sexpert Website!! Check it out!!

My Picture Thread ... ... BDSM Snail Mail ... Dear X, ... ...Ask A Porn Shop Retail Associate Anything!

ASK ME anything anything anything !!! Totally Anonymously www.formspring.me/sexpertjaneblow
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Old 07-30-2003, 10:00 AM   #30
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Quote:
Originally posted by BlueSugar
pretty much your second quote sums it up. having a dedicated musician where music is their life, and treasuring their equiptment, naming it , keeping up care, buying them things, having mini personal rituals while cleaning or restringing, tuning, tightening, before a show, after a show, practice ...etc... and then him naming it after you. Or even letting you pick the name... thats love.

Playing you like he plays his instrument, viewing you like he views his instrument, his baby, his guitar, his kit, his woodwind, brass ...etc... that is tenderness.

I also think your story where your music man made love to his guitar... ::nods:: I was breathless... bc i totaly understood. The wording, the feelings they were genuine, they were real... I know you know how I feel so I'm going to shut up before I'm reduced to a reiterating sappy mess.
Oh, BlueSugar. You already reduced ME to a sappy mess. I'm thinking of the wine red Gibson 335...the sweetest blue Gibson 135...and the Birdland that whispers when you touch her the right way or growls when she's perturbed.

And I won't even get started on the way they glow under stage lights...*sigh*

I'm glad you liked the story. I loved writing it. I'm going to be with him for the rest of the week, so I'm sure I will have many more tales to tell...all of them involving one of those luscious ladies.

And of course, me.

S.

Sorry for the hijack! We couldn't resist.
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Old 07-30-2003, 03:47 PM   #31
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Quote:
Originally posted by y=mx+b
Wow this has been very educational to me. I still have one question that has gone pretty much unanswered.

Do you make plans for it before it is to happen, or are you taken totally by suprise?
In my private fantasies in my mind I do dream of actually being raped by a stranger but it isn't brutal, it is just being forced to submit to someone elses desires and being used as nothing more than a sex object by a stranger.

I also enjoy acting out being raped but not in the sense that you read about or hear about on the news. I guess I would call it the romantic form of rape; being held down and forced to submit to my lovers wishes.

I have to agree with most of what has been said here. I don't want to be too redundant so I will tell you that I completely agree with what Sheath said.

We act out this fantasy on occasion but it is never planned ahead of time. There are certain words and attitudes that I use that tell him what I want when we are preparing to make love. He does the same thing to me. I can usually get him to force himself on me if I just act like a bitch and act out that I am not going to let him have what he desires.

As far as planning what we are going to do; no, never. That takes all the spontaneity out of sexual play and love making and I think that is a big part of the pleasure in sex.
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Old 07-30-2003, 06:10 PM   #32
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hijack? huh? oooh, right... heh ::scratches head smiling, completly lost in the moment:: yeah... guitars, stage lights, and the man you love... it doesn't get too much better.

I'm really glad that i've been able to shed some light on this topic

---------------
please please... go to the general board, or look up in "where has bluesugar posted" and find my McDonalds thread, I'm doing research and I don't want to post the thread in every forum bc that is annoying. Thank you for your time!
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Jackie Blue
The difference between pleasure and pain is perception.
I do not regret the things I've done, but those I did not do."
Empire Records

sometimes I can hear the heavy breathing through the PM window... makes my skin crawl.
LONG WINDOW STRETCHING SIG LINES OFFICALLY PISS ME OFF
friend: you are not responsible for our fetishes, nor for the fact that we turn to you to help us fulfill them
me: i like it. i'm the go to person no one talks about unless its whispered.



The Blank Manual...How do you like your Eggs?... My Very Own Sexpert Website!! Check it out!!

My Picture Thread ... ... BDSM Snail Mail ... Dear X, ... ...Ask A Porn Shop Retail Associate Anything!

ASK ME anything anything anything !!! Totally Anonymously www.formspring.me/sexpertjaneblow

Last edited by BlueSugar : 07-30-2003 at 06:21 PM.
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Old 07-30-2003, 07:26 PM   #33
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ah yes, it is like music, it can be a soft sweet sonata or abrasive and in-your-face metal.

Thank you all for more posts about the subject. I do understand the allure towards the fantasy rape, but for some reason I am having a difficult time thinking that a woman really wants this to happen.

Its kind of like watching a girl deepthroating a guy untill she gags. It looks great, it turns me on, but deep down I feel as if she wishes she was someplace else which in turn, turns me off, but still interests me.

I guess that is whats great about sex, there are so many aspects and avenues.
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Old 01-14-2013, 01:00 PM   #34
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Wantonica View Post
When it comes to rape as a fantasy, I don't believe it is really rape a woman wants, but the feeling of being overpowered and made to submit.
I had a girlfriend who was like this. I had wrestle her to get her to fuck. The first time it happened, I feared I might have hurt her, or thought she was honestly exhausted and wouldn't perform--how wrong I was!

What she wanted most was to feel it was a safe place to be completely out of control and overpowered (but never threatened), completely possessed and owned by somebody else with a dash of danger but with the promise of protection.
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Old 01-17-2013, 03:56 AM   #35
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My favorite fantasy is being raped. I don't know why, but something about surrendering to a strong man who knows what he wants ... There is a fear factor, control too ... I like reading about it, watching it, writing about it ... but never doing it ... asked my husband to tie me up, talk dirty ... just not going to happen ... when I'm here I escape and become a sexy woman.

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Old 01-17-2013, 05:13 AM   #36
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DuckLover View Post
I'll summarize a bit from previous threads on the topic; a quick search should lead you to them. Part of the appeal for some women IS the unexpected. I haven't heard anyone express an enjoyment of actual fear. All rape fantasies I've heard described are contingent upon a very secure, trusting, and loving relationship.

Most of the women I've seen post on the subject cite the loss of responsibility for the action as their turn on. Especially for women who feel guilty about enjoying sex or trying new activities, a rape fantasy means they are not responsible for what happened. Thus, they can try something they would otherwise revile, perhaps enjoy it, and not have to feel guilty for requesting or initiating it.

For some people, myself included, part of the appeal is the taboo nature of force and control. In modern egalitarian society, using force to get your way, exerting control over another person, making them do what YOU want regardless of THEIR desires is highly unacceptable, especially in a man-dominating-woman setting. The rape fantasy, when enacting within a very trusting, caring relationship, is a safe way to explore and exorcise such desires.

It will be CRITICALLY important that your relationship is absolutely trusting and rock-solid caring before attempting this kind of play. Talk about it beforehand.
Wow, quoting a 9 year old post - a new record for me!

This is the only time I have refused a lovers request... but that was a long time ago, and I never understood the attraction of it for her as I do now. Wish I had a time machine.

I must say the above quote is the best summary I have seen on the subject. But it still goes against all my years of 'mutual respect and equality' thinking. However, I now feel I better understand the dynamics of it- especially for someone that spends her entire day in charge, or not ready to admit her desire for a kinkier twist.

Good post.

Last edited by Jessie_Pinkman : 01-17-2013 at 05:33 AM. Reason: typos
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Old 01-17-2013, 05:17 AM   #37
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Just to be the agent provocateur how about things from the other angle? It seems clear from this thread that some women enjoy the fantasy, and acting out of, being taken by force (which does NOT mean rape). How about the guys? Outside of the whole BDSM master / sub dynamic I've never heard men discuss this. Do any guys enjoy this fantasy of taking a women by force? Or is this too taboo?
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Old 01-17-2013, 05:26 AM   #38
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Quote:
Originally Posted by shiny5437 View Post
Just to be the agent provocateur how about things from the other angle? It seems clear from this thread that some women enjoy the fantasy, and acting out of, being taken by force (which does NOT mean rape). How about the guys? Outside of the whole BDSM master / sub dynamic I've never heard men discuss this. Do any guys enjoy this fantasy of taking a women by force? Or is this too taboo?
I have never enjoyed reading stories of forced sex, or watching porn where a woman is being taken 'against her will'. That was why I said no once to a lover to act out a rape fantasy.

But now, with a few more years experience, with the right person and discussing it ahead of time (with safe words, like 'yellow' = ease up a bit, and 'red' stop) I would if that was her desire.
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Old 01-17-2013, 05:53 AM   #39
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Believe it or not, role playing like this helped me deal with an old traumatic experience I once had, and has helped to replace that memory with a new, better one.

YMMV.
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Old 01-20-2013, 05:08 PM   #40
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Believe it or not, role playing like this helped me deal with an old traumatic experience I once had, and has helped to replace that memory with a new, better one.

YMMV.
Still seems like playing with fire...
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Old 01-20-2013, 06:32 PM   #41
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I would love to be taken by surprise!!!!
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Old 01-21-2013, 11:06 AM   #42
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Originally Posted by y=mx+b View Post

So the question is: Are rape fantasies for real? If so whats the appeal? I can understand BDSM and a whole lot of other things but I just can't wrap my head around the actual idea of a rape fantasy.
First off, hey you....it's been AGES.

Second, for ME, I've just recently (in the past 2 years) really started opening up and exploring this side of me. Rough...raw sex is where it's at for me right now, and the appeal of the 'rape fantasy' isn't actual rape, but the power struggle and the absolute dominance of a man over me. I LIKE being subdued and overpowered, and I WANT to fight back until he manages to do so. But this is happening with a man I trust and desire. That's key for me.
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