Old 12-08-2012, 08:55 AM   #8401
DG Hear
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He Said She Said

He said.. I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it.

She said..You wear briefs, don't you

He said.. Do you love me just because my father left me a fortune?

She said.. Not at all honey, I would love you no matter who left you the money.

She said.. What do you mean by coming home half drunk?

He said.. It's not my fault.. I ran out of money.

He said.. Since I first laid eyes on you, I've wanted to make love to you in the worst way.

She said.. Well, you succeeded.

He said.. What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you

She said.. Turn sideways and look in the mirror.

He said.. Let's go out and have some fun tonight.

She said.. Okay, but if you get home before I do, leave the hallway light on.

He said.. Why don't you tell me when you have an orgasm?

She said.. I would, but you're never there.

He said.. Shall we try a different position tonight?

She said.. That's a good idea, you stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa and fart.
 

Old 12-09-2012, 04:47 AM   #8402
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27 Everyday Things You Never Knew Had Names
Scrabble will never be the same.
Dave Stopera

1. Glabella
The space between the eyebrows.

2. Vagitus
The cry of a newborn baby.

3. Chanking
Spat-out food.

4. Zarf
The sleeve on the outside of a coffee cup.

5. Niggly Wiggly
The paper ribbon at the top of Hershey's Kiss.

6. Darkle
The opposite of "sparkle." To become dark.

7. Souffle Cup
Ketchup/condiment cup.

8. Snollygoster
A person guided by personal advantage rather than consistent principles.
See: every politician ever.

9. Natiform
Something that looks like a butt.

10. Tintinnabulation
The ringing of bells.

11. Columella nasi
The space between the nostrils.

12. Rhinorrhea
Runny nose.

13. Punt
The bottom of a wine bottle.

14. Jamais vu
What happens when you say a word for so long that it loses its meaning. Limit limit limit limit limit limit limit limit limit.

15. Misophonia
Getting mad at someone for eating or breathing too loudly (among other things). It's also a brain disorder.

16. Brannock Device
The thing used to measure your feet at the shoe store.

17. River
The white spaces that randomly line up in a paragraph of text.

18. Nurdle
A tiny dab of toothpaste.

19. The Baader-Meinhof Phenomenon
When you see something for the first time and then start to see it EVERYWHERE.

20. Collywobbles
Butterflies in your stomach.

21. Clover Mite
The tiny red bug found on concrete and bricks.

22. Keeper
The loop on a belt that keeps the end in place after it has passed through the buckle.

23. Frisson
The chills you get when listening to a really good piece of music. Or just anything really good.

24. Overmorrow
The day after tomorrow.

25. Grawlix
The %#$&@ in comics, or anything else, used in place of a curse word. Also called jarns, nittles, and quimp.

26. Rasceta
The lines on the inside of your wrist.

27. L'esprit d'escalier or "stairway wit"
The moment after an argument when you think of a good comeback, but it's way too late.
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"Incident at Cemetery Junction"
"Pest Control"
"Mavis's Car Trip"
"Norman-the-dragon "
"Stacy & the Angel "
" Earth Tremor on Stage ? "

http://www.literotica.com/stories/me...php?uid=883259
 

Old 12-09-2012, 08:18 AM   #8403
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Received this from a friend

Strange Truths For Mature Humans


1. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.

2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.

3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.

4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.

5. How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

6. Was learning cursive really necessary?

7. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on # 5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighbourhood.

8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.

9. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.

10. Bad decisions make good stories.

11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.

12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection...again.

13. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page technical report that I swear I did not make any changes to.

14. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

15. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

16. I disagree with Kay Jewellers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lite than Kay.

17. I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.

18. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.

19. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said?

20. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and sisters!

21. Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.

22. Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.

23. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey - but I'd bet everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time!

24. The first testicular guard, the "Cup," was used in Hockey in 1874 and the first helmet was used in 1974. That means it only took 100 years for men to realize that their brain is also important.
 

Old 12-10-2012, 03:57 AM   #8404
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My wife's favorite...

"What do you call that nasty ugly wrinkled extra skin around the penis? I call mine 'Dear'."

I don't find it that amusing, but if I don't laugh, she goes in that room and starts preparing to cook. (shudder)
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Old 12-10-2012, 07:57 AM   #8405
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Acktion View Post
My wife's favorite...

"What do you call that nasty ugly wrinkled extra skin around the penis? I call mine 'Dear'."

I don't find it that amusing, but if I don't laugh, she goes in that room and starts preparing to cook. (shudder)
Your reply was funnier than the joke. It made me laugh, well at least smile. Thank you for posting to the humor thread. Come back often.
DG
 

Old 12-11-2012, 08:13 AM   #8406
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Nothing Works

I was enjoying the second week of a two-week vacation the same way I had enjoyed the first week: by doing as little as possible.

I ignored my wife's not-so-subtle hints about completing certain jobs around the house, but I didn't realize how much this bothered her until the clothes dryer refused to work, the iron shorted and the sewing machine motor burned out in the middle of a seam. The final straw came when she plugged in the vacuum cleaner and nothing happened.

She looked so stricken that I had to offer some consolation.

"That's okay, honey," I said. "You still have me."

She looked up at me with tears in her eyes. "Yes," she wailed, "but you don't work either!"
 

Old 12-11-2012, 09:40 AM   #8407
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My prat of a neighbour knocked on my door at 2am this morning but I didn't bother letting him in.

I mean, who the devil turns up to a party wearing a dressing gown and slippers?
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If it ain't broke, don't fix it.

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"Incident at Cemetery Junction"
"Pest Control"
"Mavis's Car Trip"
"Norman-the-dragon "
"Stacy & the Angel "
" Earth Tremor on Stage ? "

http://www.literotica.com/stories/me...php?uid=883259
 

Old 12-11-2012, 01:22 PM   #8408
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"You know," said the first secretary, "this website says that 50% of marriages end because of bad sex."

"Well," said the second, "mine ended because of good sex."

"OK, then," said the first, "tell me how that happened."

"Easy." said the second, "it was with someone other than my husband.,"
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"Incident at Cemetery Junction"
"Pest Control"
"Mavis's Car Trip"
"Norman-the-dragon "
"Stacy & the Angel "
" Earth Tremor on Stage ? "

http://www.literotica.com/stories/me...php?uid=883259
 

Old 12-12-2012, 09:14 AM   #8409
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Always By My Side

A woman's husband had been slipping in and out of a coma for several months, yet she stayed by his bedside every single day.

When he came to, he motioned for her to come nearer.

As she sat by him, he said, "You know what? You have been with me all through the bad times. When I got fired, you were there to support me. When my business failed, you were there. When I got shot, you were by my side. When we lost the house, you gave me support. When my health started failing, you were still by my side... You know what?"

"What dear?" She asked gently.

"I think you bring me bad luck."
 

Old 12-14-2012, 08:26 AM   #8410
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Fatal Things To Say To Your Pregnant Wife

17. "I finished the Oreo's."

16. "Not to imply anything, but I don't think the kid weighs forty pounds."

15. "Y'know, looking at her, you'd never guess that Pamela Lee had a baby."

14. "I sure hope your thighs aren't gonna stay that flabby forever."

13. "Well, couldn't they induce labor? The 25th is the SuperBowl."

12. "Darned if you ain't about five pounds away from a surprise visit from that Richard Simmons fella."

11. "Fred at the office passed a stone the size of a pea. Boy, that's gotta hurt."

10. "Whoa! For a minute there, I thought I woke up next to Willard Scott!"

9. "I'm jealous. Why can't men experience the joy of childbirth?"

8. "Are your ankles supposed to look like that?"

7. "Get your *own* ice cream."

6. "Geez, you're awfully puffy looking today."

5. "Got milk?"

4. "Maybe we should name the baby after my secretary, Tawney."

3. "Man! That rose tattoo on your hip is the size of Madagascar!"

2. "Retaining water ? Yeah, like the Hoover Dam retains water."

And the Number 1 Fatal Thing To Say If Your Wife Is Pregnant..

1. "You don't have the guts to pull that trigger."
 

Old 12-14-2012, 09:46 AM   #8411
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What is the difference between Jesus and Bono?

Jesus does NOT think that he is Bono.



and



Why did Snoop Dawg need an umbrella?

Fo' drizzle

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Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional. -- Kathleen Casey Theisen

Some days it just doesn't pay to gnaw through the leather straps. --Emo Philips

Don't think about it, just swallow. --my friend Eileen

She went around with a broken heart, and she wasn't sure who'd broken it. She thought it was herself, mostly.
― Ann Brashares


Come on in--the smut is fine
 

Old 12-14-2012, 01:57 PM   #8412
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Smile chatman2

Love this thread. Keep it going.
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Grandpa here, would like PM's from the ladies. Maybe emails afterward if you wish.
All PM"s welcomed..open for discussion..but am not gay or Bi.
 

Old 12-14-2012, 10:50 PM   #8413
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JackLuis-

Here My Stories

The Horny Springs Saga continues.

My New Best Friend, for our VE's


Fiction writers are just liars with typing skills.
 

Old 12-15-2012, 12:01 AM   #8414
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When the man walked into his bar and ordered six straight shots of Jack Daniels, the bartender knew something was wrong. "What's up, buddy?"

"I've always wanted to be try flying, so I took a flying lesson today. After we got up in the air, the guy put the plane on auto-pilot and announced: I'm a fifth degree black belt and a homosexual. You have one of two choices. Either jump or bend over because I'm going to have my way with you."

"Oh man," the bartender groaned, pouring a seventh shot on the house. "So, did you jump?"

"Well yeah I did.... I mean, at first I did. Then it wasn't too bad...."
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Old 12-15-2012, 09:46 AM   #8415
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Looking Good

While her husband was lying down, his wife removed his glasses. "You know, honey," she said sweetly, "Without your glasses you look like the same handsome young man I married."


"Honey," he replied with a grin, "Without my glasses, you still look pretty good too!"
 

Old 12-16-2012, 10:18 AM   #8416
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Marriage Quotes By Men

I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was Always.

It's not true that married men live longer than single men. It only seems longer.

Losing a wife can be hard. In my case, it was almost impossible.

A man was complaining to a friend: 'I had it all - money, a beautiful house,a big car, the love of a beautiful woman; then, Pow! it was all gone!' 'What happened?' asked the friend. 'My wife found out..'


Wife: Let's go out and have some fun tonight. Husband: Okay, but if you get home before I do, leave the hallway light on.

How many men does it take to open a beer? None. It should be opened by the time she brings it to the couch.

A man rushes into his house and yells to his wife, 'Martha, pack up your things! I just won the California lottery!' Martha replies, 'Shall I pack for warm weather or cold?' The man responds, 'I don't care. Just so long as you're out of the house by noon!'

Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street bald and still think they are beautiful!

I haven't spoken to my wife for 18 months - I don't like to interrupt her.

If your wife and a lawyer were drowning and you had to choose, would you go to lunch or to a movie?

A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he is finished.
 

Old 12-16-2012, 01:18 PM   #8417
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DG Hear View Post
Marriage Quotes By Men

A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he is finished.
Reminds me: A man doesn't know what true happiness is until he's married…

…and then it's too late.
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Old 12-16-2012, 01:51 PM   #8418
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Levels of Stress.

You're driving along the highway and stop to pick up a hitch-hiker, a real beauty.

But she suddenly faints so you take her to a Hospital

A bit of Stress there, perhaps.

But the Hospital tell you she's OK now and congratulate you on approaching fatherhood. You say you are not the father and she says you are.

This is getting more stressful by the day.


So you request a DNA test. After a load of hassle they do it and the tests prove you are NOT the father. You couldn't be; you're infertile.

On your way home you really get worried.
and you think about your three lovely kids.

Now that, friend, IS STRESS !
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"Incident at Cemetery Junction"
"Pest Control"
"Mavis's Car Trip"
"Norman-the-dragon "
"Stacy & the Angel "
" Earth Tremor on Stage ? "

http://www.literotica.com/stories/me...php?uid=883259
 

Old 12-17-2012, 05:57 PM   #8419
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FOR THOSE OF US WHO REMEMBER


Hollywood Squares: These great questions and answers are from the days when ' Hollywood Squares' game show responses were spontaneous, not scripted, as they are now. Peter Marshall was the host asking the questions, of course...

Q.. Paul, what is a good reason for pounding meat?
>
A. Paul Lynde: Loneliness!
>
(The audience laughed so long and so hard it took up almost 15 minutes of the show!)
>
Q. Do female frogs croak?
>
A. Paul Lynde: If you hold their little heads under water long enough.
>
Q. If you're going to make a parachute jump, at least how high should you be?
>
A. Charley Weaver: Three days of steady drinking should do it.
>
Q. True or False, a pea can last as long as 5,000 years.
>
A. George Gobel: Boy, it sure seems that way sometimes.
>
Q. You've been having trouble going to sleep. Are you probably a man or a woman?
>
A.. Don Knotts: That's what's been keeping me awake.
>
Q. According to Cosmopolitan, if you meet a stranger at a party and you think that he is attractive, is it okay to come out and ask him if he's married?
>
A.. Rose Marie: No wait until morning.
>
Q. Which of your five senses tends to diminish as you get older?
>
A. Charley Weaver: My sense of decency.
>
Q. In Hawaiian, does it take more than three words to say 'I Love You'?
>
A. Vincent Price: No, you can say it with a pineapple and a twenty.
>
Q. What are 'Do It,' 'I Can Help,' and 'I Can't Get Enough'?
>
A. George Gobel: I don't know, but it's coming from the next apartment.
>
Q. As you grow older, do you tend to gesture more or less with your hands while talking?
>
A. Rose Marie: You ask me one more growing old question Peter, and I'll give you a gesture you'll never forget.

>
Q. Paul, why do Hell's Angels wear leather?
>
A. Paul Lynde: Because chiffon wrinkles too easily.
>
Q.. Charley, you've just decided to grow strawberries. Are you going to get any during the first year?
>
A.. Charley Weaver: Of course not, I'm too busy growing strawberries.
>
Q. In bowling, what's a perfect score?
>
A. Rose Marie: Ralph, the pin boy.
>
Q. It is considered in bad taste to discuss two subjects at nudist camps.. One is politics, what is the other?
>
A. Paul Lynde: Tape measures.
>
Q. During a tornado, are you safer in the bedroom or in the closet?
>
A. Rose Marie: Unfortunately Peter, I'm always safe in the bedroom.

>
Q. Can boys join the Camp Fire Girls?
>
A.. Marty Allen: Only after lights out.
>
>
Q. When you pat a dog on its head he will wag his tail. What will a goose do?
>
A. Paul Lynde: Make him bark?
>
Q. If you were pregnant for two years, what would you give birth to?
>
A. Paul Lynde: Whatever it is, it would never be afraid of the dark.

>
Q. According to Ann Landers, is there anything wrong with getting into the habit of kissing a lot of people?
>
> A. Charley Weaver: It got me out of the army.
>
Q. It is the most abused and neglected part of your body, what is it?
>
A. Paul Lynde: Mine may be abused, but it certainly isn't neglected.
>
Q. Back in the old days, when Great Grandpa put horseradish on his head, what was he trying to do?
>
A. George Gobel: Get it in his mouth.
>
Q. Who stays pregnant for a longer period of time, your wife or your elephant?
>
A. Paul Lynde: Who told you about my elephant?
>
Q. When a couple have a baby, who is responsible for its sex?
>
A.. Charley Weaver: I'll lend him the car, the rest is up to him.
>
Q. Jackie Gleason recently revealed that he firmly believes in them and has actually seen them on at least two occasions. What are they?
>
A. Charley Weaver: His feet.
>
Q.. According to Ann Landers, what are two things you should never do in bed?
>
A. Paul Lynde: Point and laugh.
>
WE DON'T STOP LAUGHING BECAUSE WE GROW OLD,
WE GROW OLD BECAUSE WE STOP LAUGHING

Enjoy and pass on to your friends.
 

Old 12-18-2012, 09:55 AM   #8420
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Her Age

Harold's wife bought a new line of expensive cosmetics guaranteed to make her look years younger.

After a lengthy sitting before the mirror applying the "miracle" products, she asked, "Darling, honestly, what age would you say I am?"

Looking over her carefully, Harold replied, "Judging from your skin, twenty; your hair, eighteen; and your figure, twenty five."

"Oh, you flatterer!" she gushed.

"Hey, wait a minute!" Harold interrupted.

"I haven't added them up yet."
 

Old 12-18-2012, 05:34 PM   #8421
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Things you can only say at Christmas:

1. I prefer breasts to legs.

2. Tying the legs together keeps the inside moist.

3. Smother the butter all over the breasts!

4. If I don't undo my trousers, I'll burst!

5. I've never seen a better spread!

6. I'm in the mood for a little dark meat.

7. Are you ready for seconds yet?

8. It's a little dry, do you still want to eat it?

9. Just wait your turn, you'll get some!

10. Don't play with your meat.

11. Stuff it up between the legs as far as it will go.

12. Do you think you'll be able to handle all these people at once?

13. I didn't expect everyone to come at the same time!

14. You still have a little bit on your chin.

15. How long will it take after you put it in?

16. You'll know it's ready when it pops up.

17. Just pull the end and wait for the bang..

18. That's the biggest bird I've ever had!

19. I'm so full, I've been gobbling nuts all morning
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"Incident at Cemetery Junction"
"Pest Control"
"Mavis's Car Trip"
"Norman-the-dragon "
"Stacy & the Angel "
" Earth Tremor on Stage ? "

http://www.literotica.com/stories/me...php?uid=883259
 

Old 12-19-2012, 11:34 AM   #8422
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Handley_Page View Post
Things you can only say at Christmas:

1. I prefer breasts to legs.

2. Tying the legs together keeps the inside moist.

3. Smother the butter all over the breasts!

4. If I don't undo my trousers, I'll burst!

5. I've never seen a better spread!

6. I'm in the mood for a little dark meat.

7. Are you ready for seconds yet?

8. It's a little dry, do you still want to eat it?

9. Just wait your turn, you'll get some!

10. Don't play with your meat.

11. Stuff it up between the legs as far as it will go.

12. Do you think you'll be able to handle all these people at once?

13. I didn't expect everyone to come at the same time!

14. You still have a little bit on your chin.

15. How long will it take after you put it in?

16. You'll know it's ready when it pops up.

17. Just pull the end and wait for the bang..

18. That's the biggest bird I've ever had!

19. I'm so full, I've been gobbling nuts all morning



I love it, HP.
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Old 12-19-2012, 04:19 PM   #8423
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north v south

The North has Bloomingdale's; the South has Dollar General .

The North has coffee houses; the South has Waffle Houses .

The North has dating services; the South has family reunions.

The North has switchblade knives; the South has .44's, .45's, .50 cal's & 'chine guns!

The North has double last names; the South has double first names.
(AND....They marry cousins!)

The North has Indy car races; The South has stock car races .

North has Cream of Wheat; the South has grits.

The North has green salads; the South has collard greens .

The North has lobsters; the South has crawfish .

The North has the rust belt; the South has the Bible Belt .

FOR NORTHERNERS MOVING SOUTH . . .....

In the South : If you run your car into a ditch, DON'T PANIC!
Four men in a four-wheel drive pickup truck with a tow chain will be along shortly.
Don't try to help them, just stay out of their way. THIS....is what they live for!

Don't be surprised to find movie rentals and bait in the same store...
Do not buy food at this store.

Remember, 'Y'all' is singular, 'all y'all' is plural, and 'all y'all's' is plural possessive

Get used to hearing 'You ain't from 'round chere, are ya?'

Save all manner of bacon grease. You will be instructed later on how to use it.

Don't be worried at not understanding what people are saying.

They can't understand you neither. The first Southern statement to creep into a transplanted Northerner's vocabulary is the adjective 'big'ol,' truck or 'big'ol' boy.

Most Northerners begin their Southern-influenced dialect this way.
All of them are in denial about it.

The proper pronunciation you learned in school is no longer proper .

Be advised that 'He needed killin'.."IS" a valid defense here!

If you hear a Southerner exclaim, "Hey, y'all watch this!" you should stay out of the way!

These are most likely to be the last words he'll ever say.

If there is the prediction of the slightest chance of even the smallest accumulation of snow, your presence is required at the local grocery store for milk & bread! (Likely for milk & bread samiches) It doesn't matter whether you need anything or not.
You just have to go there.

Do not be surprised to find that 10-year olds own their own shotguns, they are proficient marksmen, and their mammas taught them how to aim.

In the South, we have found that the best way to grow a lush green lawn is to pour gravel on it and call it a driveway.

AND REMEMBER: If you do settle in the South and bear children, don't think we will accept them as Southerners...
After all, if the cat had kittens in the oven......
We ain't gonna call'em biscuits!
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"Incident at Cemetery Junction"
"Pest Control"
"Mavis's Car Trip"
"Norman-the-dragon "
"Stacy & the Angel "
" Earth Tremor on Stage ? "

http://www.literotica.com/stories/me...php?uid=883259
 

Old 12-20-2012, 07:56 AM   #8424
DG Hear
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Fatal Things To Say To Your Pregnant Wife

17. "I finished the Oreo's."

16. "Not to imply anything, but I don't think the kid weighs forty pounds."

15. "Y'know, looking at her, you'd never guess that Pamela Lee had a baby."

14. "I sure hope your thighs aren't gonna stay that flabby forever."

13. "Well, couldn't they induce labor? The 25th is the SuperBowl."

12. "Darned if you ain't about five pounds away from a surprise visit from that Richard Simmons fella."

11. "Fred at the office passed a stone the size of a pea. Boy, that's gotta hurt."

10. "Whoa! For a minute there, I thought I woke up next to Willard Scott!"

9. "I'm jealous. Why can't men experience the joy of childbirth?"

8. "Are your ankles supposed to look like that?"

7. "Get your *own* ice cream."

6. "Geez, you're awfully puffy looking today."

5. "Got milk?"

4. "Maybe we should name the baby after my secretary, Tawney."

3. "Man! That rose tattoo on your hip is the size of Madagascar!"

2. "Retaining water ? Yeah, like the Hoover Dam retains water."

And the Number 1 Fatal Thing To Say If Your Wife Is Pregnant..

1. "You don't have the guts to pull that trigger."
 

Old 12-21-2012, 08:07 AM   #8425
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Tribunal Application

I, the Penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons:

1. I do physical labour.
2. I work at great depths.
3. I plunge head-first into everything I do.
4. I do not get weekends or public holidays off.
5. I work in a damp environment.
6. I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation.
7. I work in high temperatures.
8. My work exposes me to contagious diseases.
Sincerely,
P. Niss

The Response
Dear P. Niss:
After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you have raised, the administration rejects your request for the following reasons:
1. You do not work 8 hours straight.
2. You fall asleep after brief work periods.
3. You do not always follow the orders of the management team.
4. You do not stay in your designated area and are often seen visiting other locations.
5. You do not take initiative - you need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start working.
6. You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift.
7. You don't always observe necessary safety regulations, such as wearing the Correct protective clothing.
8. You will retire well before you are 65.
9. You are unable to work double shifts.
10. You sometimes leave your designated work area before you have completed the assigned task..
11. And if that were not all, you have been seen constantly entering and exiting the workplace carrying two suspicious-looking bags.

Sincerely,
V. Gina
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If it ain't broke, don't fix it.

Handley Page

"Incident at Cemetery Junction"
"Pest Control"
"Mavis's Car Trip"
"Norman-the-dragon "
"Stacy & the Angel "
" Earth Tremor on Stage ? "

http://www.literotica.com/stories/me...php?uid=883259
 
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