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12-02-2012, 10:03 AM
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#1
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Experienced
astuffedshirt_perv is offline
Join Date: Jun 2002
Posts: 73
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Mind Control advice
I am well into a story that was supposed to go in the Mind Control genre. However, as it has progressed, I am wondering if MC readers will be disappointed, as the Mind Controller is never revealed and the Mind Controllee never thinks "I'm being controlled". She understands that she is acting in ways she would not normally act (I can't believe I'm doing this), but she rolls with it.
It's ending up as an Erotic Coupling story where you have to suspend disbelief for it work. Thoughts?
__________________
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"The heated act of sex often expunges judgment, pushing the participants into territory they hadn't previously contemplated. " -Natasha Vargas-Cooper
My stories:
A Stuffed Shirt Perv
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12-02-2012, 10:16 AM
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#2
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Back in the saddle
Darkniciad is offline
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Indiana
Posts: 7,117
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I think it's going to depend upon how aware she is that her actions are outside her norm and how much she struggles with it.
It's certainly a departure from centering the story on the controller -- and I don't necessarily think that's a bad thing. How the readers will react, I can't say.
I know I've pulled a bait-n-switch in the category before where the mind control wasn't real, but some of the sex was because the main character believed he had the power.
At 4.39 536 votes 71428 views and 8 positive public comments, it's no blockbuster, but the readers accepted it reasonably enough. So, there's latitude to explore different territory without getting reamed by the readership.
How it will perform in EC probably depends upon the same factors I mentioned at the beginning. In this case, the more you stress the supernatural, the less likely it is to perform -- but EC is such a catch-all that it may very well do okay there as well.
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12-02-2012, 01:43 PM
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#3
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Literotica Guru
sr71plt is online now
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Mid-Atlantic, USA
Posts: 27,083
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Why would a character need ever to realize their mind was being controlled--or even that they were controlling someone else's mind? Isn't it enough that the reader understands--or comes to understand--that?
__________________
  "I don;t spend time checking on what other people are doing, I just worry about my own shit."  
--Lovecraft68
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12-02-2012, 02:51 PM
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#4
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WASP MASTER OF AMERICA.
JAMESBJOHNSON is online now
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: BAD SIDE OF TOWN
Posts: 30,524
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Real mind control is subtle and generally subliminal.
__________________
DONT MAKE ME LAUGH! THIS IS AMERICA. IN AMERICA YOURE ON YOUR OWN. Jackie Cogan
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12-02-2012, 03:45 PM
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#5
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Dirty Old Man
TxRad is offline
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Texas
Posts: 25,126
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JAMESBJOHNSON
Real mind control is subtle and generally subliminal.
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That sure leaves you out but you are pretty much correct.
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12-02-2012, 03:49 PM
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#6
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bitsie
sethp is offline
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Las Vegas
Posts: 11,677
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I think you could easily ad a few sentences here and there to bring it back firmly into the MC realm without hurting your story any.
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12-02-2012, 04:17 PM
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#7
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Experienced
astuffedshirt_perv is offline
Join Date: Jun 2002
Posts: 73
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>Real mind control is subtle and generally subliminal.
Yes, but most stories in the Mind Control section are bop you over head explicit mind control, so I don't know how subtly will play out with the readers.
__________________
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"The heated act of sex often expunges judgment, pushing the participants into territory they hadn't previously contemplated. " -Natasha Vargas-Cooper
My stories:
A Stuffed Shirt Perv
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12-02-2012, 05:35 PM
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#8
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WASP MASTER OF AMERICA.
JAMESBJOHNSON is online now
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: BAD SIDE OF TOWN
Posts: 30,524
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TxRad
That sure leaves you out but you are pretty much correct.
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Of course I'm correct.
__________________
DONT MAKE ME LAUGH! THIS IS AMERICA. IN AMERICA YOURE ON YOUR OWN. Jackie Cogan
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12-02-2012, 05:43 PM
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#9
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Dirty Old Man
TxRad is offline
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Texas
Posts: 25,126
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JAMESBJOHNSON
Of course I'm correct.
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As the old saying goes, even a blind hog gets lucky sometimes.
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12-03-2012, 11:41 PM
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#10
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Really Experienced
TinyBeth is offline
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 227
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The most recent story in MC was a bait and switch with no real control and is doing rather well.
My current contest story is also in MC and there is no "controller" per se. It is doing pretty well too, although not spectacularly.
I say if it feels like MC put it in MC. EC can be perceived as milquetoast by some and the MC elements may not fly too well with that category's readers.
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12-04-2012, 01:23 AM
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#11
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Literotica Guru
Hubs_in_hose is offline
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: DFW
Posts: 872
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Quote:
Originally Posted by astuffedshirt_perv
>Real mind control is subtle and generally subliminal.
Yes, but most stories in the Mind Control section are bop you over head explicit mind control, so I don't know how subtly will play out with the readers.
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I have a MC series that I am working on that is less supernatural and it has gotten a positive response. (I need to finish the next few chapters) My story is less puppetmaster and more guiding hand. Although there are a few scenes where the controller acts out due to emotion and pushes the target a bit.
I think it just matters how you set up the person with the powers. Are they "learning" how to use their powers? Is it temporary? Is it fake? I have read a few MC stories that were really just the person saying what he wanted and his one and only subject not refusing the "suggestions". The target was actually able to refuse, but didn't for various reasons.
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12-04-2012, 06:56 AM
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#12
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Virgin
williamj218 is offline
Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 1
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Yüz Germe
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Yüz Germe
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12-04-2012, 07:02 AM
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#13
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WASP MASTER OF AMERICA.
JAMESBJOHNSON is online now
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: BAD SIDE OF TOWN
Posts: 30,524
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TxRad
As the old saying goes, even a blind hog gets lucky sometimes.
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Its also said that THE HOG ALWAYS RETURNS TO HIS WALLOW, which would be you.
__________________
DONT MAKE ME LAUGH! THIS IS AMERICA. IN AMERICA YOURE ON YOUR OWN. Jackie Cogan
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