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Old 11-26-2012, 07:00 AM   #1
thekarpathianman
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Ask for Feedback/Comments

I' ll very highly appreciate your kind feedback/comments about following Chapters of my Story "Young Studs for Carol"(Incest/Taboo and Mature Categories):
http://www.literotica.com/s/young-studs-for-carol-ch-05
http://www.literotica.com/s/young-studs-for-carol-ch-06
Your reply will give me an important inducement to continue.
Many thanks.
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Old 11-28-2012, 09:16 AM   #2
PennLady
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I wanted to send you a Private Message (PM) but you haven't enabled them. You might want to -- got to "User CP" at the top left of this page, then go to the options on the left sidebar of the next page to enable PMs.

I'll just keep this quick, anyway. I'm not sure what type of comment or feedback you wanted. I read the first few bits of each of your links and both are totally not the kind of story I enjoy, so I can't say much about them.
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Old 11-28-2012, 05:10 PM   #3
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I'm with Pennlady on this...

I read just the first few lines and wonder how this even got published here since it seems to have some pedophilia. Maybe I'm wrong but he talks about a naked young boy and his mother?
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Old 11-28-2012, 05:12 PM   #4
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Quote:
Originally Posted by nakdsub View Post
I read just the first few lines and wonder how this even got published here since it seems to have some pedophilia. Maybe I'm wrong but he talks about a naked young boy and his mother?
I didn't read far enough in but I assumed (and I suppose I shouldn't) that the son in question was 18 or over. I actually had that impression but I couldn't say why. But I'm not willing to go back to chapter 1 and see.
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Old 11-28-2012, 06:17 PM   #5
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Oh, jeez.

Okay, the age is not stated and I suppose that where the author is saying Scott has a pretty big tool, that we're supposed to think he's 18, but....

This feels underage to me. The language the undertones, it also seems to have some nc/reluctance captor slave theme going.

I didn't read too far because the language squicks me. even mom is constantly referred to as "lil one" and Big daddy and....

I just don't like the feel.

It feels like the main character is some sort of semi retarded sexual deviant who is disproportionately described.

I don;t care how big you are, you do not carry a full grown woman and her son (allegedly 18) in the crooks of your arms.

You know what is odd, is that looking at the author's page the incest chapters all have fairly low scores for the category (leading me to believe others feel as I do) but ch 6 in mature has a H rating.

Last edited by lovecraft68 : 11-28-2012 at 06:19 PM.
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Old 11-29-2012, 10:19 AM   #6
thekarpathianman
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Quote:
Originally Posted by nakdsub View Post
I read just the first few lines and wonder how this even got published here since it seems to have some pedophilia. Maybe I'm wrong but he talks about a naked young boy and his mother?
This is an insult.
You MUST be careful, before using words like "pedophilia". Pedophilia is a crime, before being a matter of acceptance in Literotica's stories. May be you forget it.
You and the following reader (PennLady), who says to have "assumed" but he "shouldn't" that the boy's age is over 18, you have to take firmly fixed in your minds that:
1. You have, of course, all the right to say that the story is rubbish,
but BEFORE ALLUDING TO OUTRAGEOUS SUSPICIONS
2. You MUST go into the story.

On the contrary, you have read not even the first eight lines of my note in italics at the beginning of Chapter 5 of http://www.literotica.com/s/young-studs-for-carol-ch-05
I repeat it for everybody to know:
"All the characters are over eighteen years old".
Stop. I don't want to hear from you.
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Old 11-29-2012, 12:51 PM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by thekarpathianman View Post
This is an insult.
You MUST be careful, before using words like "pedophilia". Pedophilia is a crime, before being a matter of acceptance in Literotica's stories. May be you forget it.
You and the following reader (PennLady), who says to have "assumed" but he "shouldn't" that the boy's age is over 18, you have to take firmly fixed in your minds that:
1. You have, of course, all the right to say that the story is rubbish,
but BEFORE ALLUDING TO OUTRAGEOUS SUSPICIONS
2. You MUST go into the story.

On the contrary, you have read not even the first eight lines of my note in italics at the beginning of Chapter 5 of http://www.literotica.com/s/young-studs-for-carol-ch-05
I repeat it for everybody to know:
"All the characters are over eighteen years old".
Stop. I don't want to hear from you.
No offense was intended. And you're right, I missed the author's note. Or rather, I skimmed it but obviously didn't register it all. My apologies; all characters are over eighteen, and so no problem. And I don't see why you'd be mad at me for assuming he was over eighteen; after all, that means I figured you followed the rules.

Anyway, age aside, the rest of my post stands. I don't know what kind of feedback you want. Comments on grammar and punctuation? Comments on plot or character? Believability? In addition, I did at least check out your story and found out it wasn't something I wanted to read. I posted b/c the thread had sat here for days with no activity and I thought you deserved some sort of response.
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Old 11-29-2012, 05:19 PM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by thekarpathianman View Post
This is an insult.
You MUST be careful, before using words like "pedophilia". Pedophilia is a crime, before being a matter of acceptance in Literotica's stories. May be you forget it.
You and the following reader (PennLady), who says to have "assumed" but he "shouldn't" that the boy's age is over 18, you have to take firmly fixed in your minds that:
1. You have, of course, all the right to say that the story is rubbish,
but BEFORE ALLUDING TO OUTRAGEOUS SUSPICIONS
2. You MUST go into the story.

On the contrary, you have read not even the first eight lines of my note in italics at the beginning of Chapter 5 of http://www.literotica.com/s/young-studs-for-carol-ch-05
I repeat it for everybody to know:
"All the characters are over eighteen years old".
Stop. I don't want to hear from you.
Welcome to my ignore file. Given my choice between hearing from nakedsub and PennLady and you, they win and you lose, having made a lousy impression with the first post of yours I have ever seen.
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Old 11-29-2012, 05:58 PM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by thekarpathianman View Post
"All the characters are over eighteen years old".
I haven't read any of your story; just responding to this. A disclaimer like this on a story means absolutely nothing if the content of the story conveys the contrary to the readers. I don't know if it does or not, but just pointing to your disclaimer means nothing to me.
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Old 11-29-2012, 07:27 PM   #10
lovecraft68
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Of course you can say they're over 18. If you say they are in your mind, then I take your word.

But, when it comes to under age many authors use a readers perception to tell a different story.

Disclaimer or not this reads under age. To me, its a turn off, but to many others its a turn on and for that exact reason.

I am not one for majority rules, but you asked for feedback and it seems the consensus is this seems under age.

And this is not meant as an insult, just a simple point.
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Old 11-29-2012, 07:46 PM   #11
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Quote:
Originally Posted by thekarpathianman View Post
Quote:
Originally Posted by nakdsub View Post
I read just the first few lines and wonder how this even got published here since it seems to have some pedophilia. Maybe I'm wrong but he talks about a naked young boy and his mother?
This is an insult.
[ ...]
Stop. I don't want to hear from you.
So... let me get this straight. You ask for opinions, someone gives it to you, and you tell them you don't want to hear it?

There are two problems going into this.

1) You cannot require people to get the facts straight. People are going to make snap judgments on your story; that's just part and parcel of being an author. (I shudder to think of the thousands of readers who never enjoyed my stories because I can't write blurbs to save my life, and the non-descriptive descriptions turned them off.) When you are misjudged--not if, when--your job is not to snap at people about it. Your job to write your stories in such a way that they cannot be misjudged. You cannot control The Reader's reactions. You can only control the thing that they react to: your story.

By yelling at someone who is giving you their reactions, you show a serious lack of understanding of how fiction works. It is your job to write the story well. It is not our job to read it well. And even if we did, that would skew your reactions, because the casual readers out on the site? They won't read it well. They will read it casually, skim it even... and, probably, come away with bad or ill-informed judgments. If you're not okay with this, you had best stop writing. Don't fight human nature. You won't win. o_O

2) Your first reaction is to be defensive, to accuse other people of flaws and bad readership. That's bad, because it means you are not listening. Another part-and-parcel of being a writer is listening to things you don't want to listen to. In only two posts on this board you have already shown you have difficulty in doing so. This does not bode well for your future as an author. You will not improve if you refuse to listen to people's opinions on what you've done badly.

Personally, I'm with Tyro. You're going on my Ignore list. You've been offensive and disrespectful to forum members who are trying to help you. That's about as bad a start as one can make, and I'd rather not see your contributions cluttering up the forums.

Best of luck on your stories. If you're not able to change your attitude, you'll need all the luck you can get.
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Old 11-29-2012, 07:49 PM   #12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by thekarpathianman View Post
I' ll very highly appreciate your kind feedback/comments about following Chapters of my Story "Young Studs for Carol"
If all you are looking for is kind words, don't call it feedback

In the beginning you mention English isn't your first language, and you explain how much work you had to do to write the story. You then say we should judge it based on your intent, not your spelling and grammar.

At the end you say you welcome praise and positive comments, but if we didn't like it, you'd appreciate our silence?

Soliciting only the praise is a waste of everybody's time, sorry.
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Old 11-30-2012, 09:12 AM   #13
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I don't mind suspending reality, checking my brain cells at the door, and reading a story outside a genre that typically arouses me. I did all those things to get through these two chapters. I didn't love it. It was just okay. But please keep writing, thanks.
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Old 12-01-2012, 06:19 AM   #14
thekarpathianman
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Quote:
Originally Posted by fyrehart View Post
I am new here and I am receiving anonymous feedback suggesting under age sexual scenes. I want nothing to do with this taboo. How do I deal with it? I have reported it today but I am wondering if that is enough?
Quote:
Originally Posted by TxRad View Post
Delete the comment and ignore them or report them. That is the two options.
And I will be following the same suggestion.
I will continue to accept, as I always did in the past, any comment on my stories, also if totally negative, but I will refuse with anger any reference/suspicion/arbitrary assumption to under age/pedofilia, because it's a kind of perversion I loath: it has nothing to do, AT ALL, with my mind, habit, custom and it was/is/will be always out of my stories.
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Old 12-01-2012, 09:29 AM   #15
PennLady
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Quote:
Originally Posted by thekarpathianman View Post
And I will be following the same suggestion.
I will continue to accept, as I always did in the past, any comment on my stories, also if totally negative, but I will refuse with anger any reference/suspicion/arbitrary assumption to under age/pedofilia, because it's a kind of perversion I loath: it has nothing to do, AT ALL, with my mind, habit, custom and it was/is/will be always out of my stories.
Then I think you need a thicker skin. Someone will always make a mistake with a story -- they will misinterpret something, they will miss a "not" where there is one, or insert one where there isn't one.

And again, I'd like to point out that although I had the impression the kid was underage, I figured he wasn't b/c the story was up. I gave you the benefit of the doubt of following the rules. And as far as what you loathe (or don't) -- just how am I, a total stranger reading your story, supposed to know what it is you loathe?

If you are going to react 'with anger' to feedback, even if the reader is wrong, you aren't going to get much of it.

Last edited by PennLady : 12-01-2012 at 11:14 AM.
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Old 12-03-2012, 03:32 PM   #16
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Gee,
I don't know what genres you follow PennLady, but I like your style and grace, along with Lovecraft and Cwatson. Together you have taught me something that should have been blindingly obvious: get an editor to look at my work before posting it.
Beauty, or the opposite, is always in the eye of the beholder. The reader can really never be wrong and someone offering feedback does so from their personal experience, since that is all they have to go on. The job of someone seeking feedback is always to say thank you. No more, no less and then go and work out how or why the reader could interpret what they read the way they did.
I think I will get an editor to go over all my stories and then repost them properly redacted.
Thanks for your great posts.
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