Old 08-26-2012, 07:55 AM   #176
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when you do a lit search for posts, etc, by default it halts the search at 6 months ago or something like that. try it again but look at the default date range.

note that lit makes you wait about a minute or so between searches.

ed
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Old 08-30-2012, 05:37 PM   #177
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Help! I got 2 in one day. Do I win a prize? One of these fine gentlemen has sent me this pm 3 times. The first time I tried sarcastically answering, the second time I ignored. I figure third time fair game right?

So how do I respond?

Quote:
Originally Posted by perpetual asshat
Title: bluilacgrl- How about I climb...

between those hot legs and suck on your naughty pussy while you chat with all of your Lit boys?

Or aren't you that kind of girl?

;-)
And then I received this stellar one as well


Quote:
Originally Posted by new asshat
Title: hey

may i ask you
have you ever left your wet panties for some elese to find them ?
I mean really?
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Last edited by blulilacgrl : 08-30-2012 at 08:31 PM.
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Old 08-30-2012, 08:58 PM   #178
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Respond this way:

I am that kind of girl. And I want you to climb between my legs. I want you to rub my legs. Pull down my panties. Lick me. And then you know what I want you to do next?

Then click send. When he writes back, wanting to know. Say, I want you to pull down my panties, take your tongue out and lick me. Lick my thighs. Lick my ass. My balls. And then suck on my penis until I cum in your mouth.
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Old 08-30-2012, 09:20 PM   #179
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Yeah a big rock got dislodged somewhere and they all came crawling out from under it this week.

perpetual asshat: I'd say, "Look asshat, you sent me this 3 times now. Go get in your rape van, and go cruise the roller rinks, or bowling alleys, or somewhere equally lame to get some new pick up lines. Nothing could be worse than what you are using now. I wouldn't let you lick the cat box, let alone my box."

Or conversely, "Congratulations! You have been chosen to be featured in a thread dedicated to gentleman with your style and finesse," and then provide a link to the asshat thread.

The one I got on Tues, was an unsolicited dick picture with his wang hanging out of his zipper. I sent back, "Excuse me but do you know your zipper is down? And really, you were proud enough of that lil thing to snap a picture of it? It's so tiny and precious!" Oddly he did not reply. . .
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Old 08-31-2012, 06:04 AM   #180
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Saucyminx View Post
The one I got on Tues, was an unsolicited dick picture with his wang hanging out of his zipper. I sent back, "Excuse me but do you know your zipper is down? And really, you were proud enough of that lil thing to snap a picture of it? It's so tiny and precious!" Oddly he did not reply. . .
Reminds me of a lovely comeback I heard somewhere: "Oh wow! It's just like a penis only smaller!"
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Old 08-31-2012, 08:05 AM   #181
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Saucyminx View Post
Yeah a big rock got dislodged somewhere and they all came crawling out from under it this week.

perpetual asshat: I'd say, "Look asshat, you sent me this 3 times now. Go get in your rape van, and go cruise the roller rinks, or bowling alleys, or somewhere equally lame to get some new pick up lines. Nothing could be worse than what you are using now. I wouldn't let you lick the cat box, let alone my box."

Or conversely, "Congratulations! You have been chosen to be featured in a thread dedicated to gentleman with your style and finesse," and then provide a link to the asshat thread.

The one I got on Tues, was an unsolicited dick picture with his wang hanging out of his zipper. I sent back, "Excuse me but do you know your zipper is down? And really, you were proud enough of that lil thing to snap a picture of it? It's so tiny and precious!" Oddly he did not reply. . .
I think the best thing you can say to a guy to insult his penis is, "It is so cute!!!!"

Although, I love the "it's like a penis, only smaller". That's class.
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Old 08-31-2012, 09:33 AM   #182
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Bramblethorn View Post
Reminds me of a lovely comeback I heard somewhere: "Oh wow! It's just like a penis only smaller!"
*files away for future use*
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Old 08-31-2012, 01:57 PM   #183
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Granny porn, send them granny porn, that should cool their jets.
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Old 08-31-2012, 02:45 PM   #184
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You guys are fuckin' awesome! I love it!! I am filing all of your replies away for future use.
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Old 08-31-2012, 03:10 PM   #185
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I used to have this link... I'd send it to people who sent me stupid ass emails. It would just brig up pop up after pop up. It wasn't harmful. No viruses. But you couldn't close it out until after about a minute. But the best part was that it had this really loud voice that said, "Hey everybody!!! I'm looking at gay porn!!!" And it repeated over and over and over and over. Bwhahahaha. I have some friends who hate my guts because of that.
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Old 08-31-2012, 03:22 PM   #186
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Quote:
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I used to have this link..
That is awesome!
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Old 08-31-2012, 04:36 PM   #187
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Oh man that's fabulous!
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Old 08-31-2012, 04:42 PM   #188
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NippleMuncher View Post
That is awesome!
The best was my buddy at college who thought he was opening a political email. I taught him a lesson for sending me his stupid ass political emails. I hate that shit. So I got him good. Luckily in the library, they had speakers on the computers. Bwhahahaha.

We don't talk a lot now.
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Old 08-31-2012, 09:24 PM   #189
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I would love to send that to my IT buddies, but their work computers are severely internet filtered and won't allow about 80% of the internet through.
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Old 08-31-2012, 11:22 PM   #190
imemkay
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3 PMs from the same guy...

May I...Ask, respectfully, if you find
(insert pic link here)
erotic?

I am 48, and a (career that indicates he is likely a douche) here in Central XXXX. I hope you're having a wonderful time here on Lit. And enough with the photons.
Yours,
Asshat

Nothing completely outrageous, but still probably trolling. At least he's not all "hey baby let's do it" but the more I think about it, the more annoyed I get. Four things bother me about this:

1. You don't want to be respectful, or you wouldn't keep sending PMs when I don't respond to the first one. That isn't respectful, it's wasting my time.

2. I didn't ask you to send me a pic. If you want to know if people find it erotic, how about posting it on the Erotic Couples Images thread? You'll get lots of feedback, I'm sure. I did not respond because after seeing the pic, the couple looked like they were not quite 18 and it frankly creeped me out.

3. "enough with the photons" Now you insult my profession and my adorable nerdiness! Poorly played, Asshat, poorly played. Be thankful you are not on my exam table or I'd fire up that KV and MAS and fry your tiny testicles right off.

4. Signed "Yours"? I do not know you...you are not mine!!

Please someone tell me I'm not the only lucky one to receive PMs from this guy!
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Old 09-01-2012, 08:11 AM   #191
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Quote:
Originally Posted by imemkay View Post
May I...Ask, respectfully, if you find
(insert pic link here)
erotic?

I am 48, and a (career that indicates he is likely a douche) here in Central XXXX. I hope you're having a wonderful time here on Lit. And enough with the photons.
Yours,
Asshat

Nothing completely outrageous, but still probably trolling. At least he's not all "hey baby let's do it" but the more I think about it, the more annoyed I get. Four things bother me about this:

1. You don't want to be respectful, or you wouldn't keep sending PMs when I don't respond to the first one. That isn't respectful, it's wasting my time.

2. I didn't ask you to send me a pic. If you want to know if people find it erotic, how about posting it on the Erotic Couples Images thread? You'll get lots of feedback, I'm sure. I did not respond because after seeing the pic, the couple looked like they were not quite 18 and it frankly creeped me out.

3. "enough with the photons" Now you insult my profession and my adorable nerdiness! Poorly played, Asshat, poorly played. Be thankful you are not on my exam table or I'd fire up that KV and MAS and fry your tiny testicles right off.

4. Signed "Yours"? I do not know you...you are not mine!!

Please someone tell me I'm not the only lucky one to receive PMs from this guy!

Hahahaha. Tell us a list of douchie careers!!!! I wanna know what they are.
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Old 09-01-2012, 01:31 PM   #192
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Before I had even began to fill in my profile details I received this little gem:

may i ask you
have you ever left your wet panties for some elese to find them ?

I mean really, what ever happened to hello?!
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Old 09-01-2012, 02:23 PM   #193
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JessicaE View Post
Before I had even began to fill in my profile details I received this little gem:

may i ask you
have you ever left your wet panties for some elese to find them ?

I mean really, what ever happened to hello?!
Well!!!! Have you?!?!? I asked in private, but you ignored me!
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Old 09-01-2012, 04:24 PM   #194
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Douchie Careers...

Douchie careers? How about a porn casting director?? That's one. It wasn't the chosen career or the asshat that PM'd me, but it is douchie!

I'm not going to list his career, because frankly I don't want to open that can of worns.

Let's talk about career with the hottest and non-douchiest people in them instead. I'll start:

ENGINEERS!!
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Old 09-01-2012, 05:27 PM   #195
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Quote:
Originally Posted by pmann View Post
Well!!!! Have you?!?!? I asked in private, but you ignored me!
Didn't you get my reply? I told you that I only like to leave my panties lying around for other people when they have skidmarks on them
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Old 09-01-2012, 05:43 PM   #196
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Quote:
Originally Posted by imemkay View Post
Let's talk about career with the hottest and non-douchiest people in them instead. I'll start:

ENGINEERS!!
I think this is understood universally as the sexiest career ever. It just is.



I see. JessicaE, next time, don't post my asshat PM on this page.
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Old 09-03-2012, 08:10 AM   #197
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I've started offering constructive criticism on the worst of them - just can't help myself!
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Old 09-03-2012, 08:15 AM   #198
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Haha - just offered my suggestions on how an asshat could get more responses & got this in return -

"I do just fine thanks lol

That's a lot of work to more than likely not even get a reply."

I suggested, rather than cutting & pasting a message, using a woman's name & saying he liked something about her in his PMs - if that's a lot of work then I despair to think what he must be like in bed!
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Old 09-03-2012, 08:22 AM   #199
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It's sad, isn't it, when they don't even realize that a little bit of "work" would more than likely increase their odds. You're right he probably just lays three in bed and makes the girl do all the work....lazy bastard!!!
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Old 09-03-2012, 08:53 AM   #200
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Quote:
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It's sad, isn't it, when they don't even realize that a little bit of "work" would more than likely increase their odds. You're right he probably just lays three in bed and makes the girl do all the work....lazy bastard!!!
But my wife likes it when I let her do all the work.
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