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Old 03-20-2009, 06:09 AM   #176
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theres a little walk down memory lane.
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Old 03-21-2009, 08:52 PM   #177
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Hi all, thought I'd bump this thread and put some of the details that have been posted earlier on the thread in this post.

Hope it has been a great weekend.

Quote:
Originally Posted by kayte View Post
Bumping this thread as Sub Drop, or just plain Dropping is important for people to know about.

I know that from hearing of a friend of mine who experienced an intense session with two men. She had wanted it, and the three of them arranged it and had a good time. It was not in any way a D/s event.

A few days later, one of the men involved mentioned to me that "she" the woman they had played with was all depressed.

I asked him for the details of what they all did, and for the details of what they all did to "recover", to come down from the play. It was rather intense, but nothing out of line.

They all had had time constraints, and they separated and went their seperate ways almost immediately.

After hearing the tale, the first thought I had was "she dropped". It may not have been a scene in a D/s sense, but it was intense play, and the endorphins do flow.

I told him that, and I then had to explain it to him, and that it could happen after any intense play.

I offered to contact her, and let her know what I think was happening.

It turns out, she almost immediately responded to my message to her with, "Yes!!! That is it. That is how I feel."

I explained things to her as well as I could. When and how I experienced it, and how aftercare from my Sir was so important.

She says I helped. I also suggested she make sure any other people she plays with, is aware that can happen, what they can do to make things better.
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Originally Posted by kayte View Post
Yes Black Tulip ~ I am sure that is what it was. Any intense activity that calls the endorpins out, that make you feel so good can do that. Be it sex, running, swimming all kinds of things.

Your body just responded to the lack of endorphins as they left your body. I think knowing that is what it is helps people to realize what is happening.

I know when I am with my Sir I can feel the drop while with Him after an intense scene. He holds and helps me recenter myself. But those feelings do come back after we have separated, such as the next day.

Please remember you are ok, and think about how much fun it was. And how good it will be as you continue your journey. And please remember that is what it is. It isn't a race.

If you have any questions you don't want to put here, please feel free to PM me. But then sharing things on this thread allows it to help others.
Quote:
Originally Posted by kayte View Post
Good afternoon Stag of Oberon ~ I am not a medical specialist, I do know from my Gram's symptoms and treatment that depression is in many cases caused by a chemical imbalance or change.

Sub drop is the body's reaction to the easing of the endorphins that were released, and when the "good feelings" decrease the body feels "sad". Thus a chemical change. I know in my case and in the case of many I have talked to, either here, on the phone, even in person; the knowing what can be causing that helps so much.

Perhaps it doesn't fit the scenario earlier, but it may help sometime in the future.

Have a fantastic afternoon/evening.
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Old 03-23-2009, 06:32 PM   #178
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A gentle bump
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Now I lay me down to sleep...one less terrorist this world does keep...
with all my heart I give my thanks...to those in uniform regardless of rank ...
you serve our country and serve it well...with humble hearts your stories tell...
so as I rest my weary eyes...while freedom rings our flag still flies...
you give your all, do what you must...with God we live and IN God we trust....Amen.

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Old 08-10-2010, 02:57 PM   #179
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Top-drop. That is so me.

With only reading through a few posts I knew exactly that it fit me, except I'm the top. I think it bottoms in some insecurity deep down questioning whether or not she truly loves me, or simply use me when she needs to feel belonging. I know even as I type it that it is ridiculous, we are mad about each other, but the feelings don't always follow my head. It's like a bodily reaction to something that doesn't fit with what I know is reality.

After intense play I can suddenly feel desperately lonely. Does she know how much I need my girl? hm...

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Old 08-10-2010, 03:30 PM   #180
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kathykitten View Post
Top-drop. That is so me.

With only reading through a few posts I knew exactly that it fit me, except I'm the top. I think it bottoms in some insecurity deep down questioning whether or not she truly loves me, or simply use me when she needs to feel belonging. I know even as I type it that it is ridiculous, we are mad about each other, but the feelings don't always follow my head. It's like a bodily reaction to something that doesn't fit with what I know is reality.

After intense play I can suddenly feel desperately lonely. Does she know how much I need my girl? hm...
Hi Kathykitten ~ Welcome to Lit and to the thread. Yes it does so apply to tops and bottoms. I'm glad you posted. Hope all is going well for you and her.
And yes it is a body's chemical reaction and the response to the cessation of those "wonderful" chemicals that causes the drop.

Do you know that you should be able to select and put up your first avatar? If you have any questions, please ask.
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Now I lay me down to sleep...one less terrorist this world does keep...
with all my heart I give my thanks...to those in uniform regardless of rank ...
you serve our country and serve it well...with humble hearts your stories tell...
so as I rest my weary eyes...while freedom rings our flag still flies...
you give your all, do what you must...with God we live and IN God we trust....Amen.

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Old 08-20-2010, 01:49 AM   #181
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Sorry, wasn't paying attention. Doh! Nothing to see here.
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Last edited by CynMarie : 08-20-2010 at 01:53 AM. Reason: Actually read ahead.
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Old 08-30-2010, 05:59 AM   #182
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Old 09-07-2010, 10:49 AM   #183
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Brit_Babe View Post
I've only realised recently that I suffer from this and it normally happens about a week after a session. I get incredibly tearful, feel guilty and very often feel like telling Sir that we should go our seperate ways (it doesn't help that we can't always speak to each other), but after a good sleep and plenty of chocolate I usually feel better.

I think for me it's very emotional and makes me really think about life and what I want from it, getting affection from him to then going back to everyday life where I wake up with no cuddles in bed hurts me. It makes me realise that although I loved my single life I now might be ready for a proper relationship where I know and hope there will be a real future with a guy (just a shame it won't be with Sir).
Not sure about Sub Drop, but surely the emotions you are revealing here are describing any relationship based purely on short term physical fulfilment? At the end of the day you'll want, or rather some people will want, something more based on 'love' (I vommed a little bit in my mouth there), but with still the physical side too.

Some people only have, and are happy with, purely the physical side of love; others have, are happy, with just the emotional side. And some lucky bastards get both.

Most people are probably somewhere in between. Sounds like you maybe are looking to change the balance a little bit.

Last edited by creepish : 09-07-2010 at 10:51 AM.
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Old 09-08-2010, 05:29 PM   #184
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Quote:
Originally Posted by creepish View Post
Not sure about Sub Drop, but surely the emotions you are revealing here are describing any relationship based purely on short term physical fulfilment? At the end of the day you'll want, or rather some people will want, something more based on 'love' (I vommed a little bit in my mouth there), but with still the physical side too.

Some people only have, and are happy with, purely the physical side of love; others have, are happy, with just the emotional side. And some lucky bastards get both.

Most people are probably somewhere in between. Sounds like you maybe are looking to change the balance a little bit.
You know what, I think you're spot on there!

(I also want to be one of the lucky bastards who gets both sides)
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Old 01-01-2011, 11:10 AM   #185
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A New Years' Bump!
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Now I lay me down to sleep...one less terrorist this world does keep...
with all my heart I give my thanks...to those in uniform regardless of rank ...
you serve our country and serve it well...with humble hearts your stories tell...
so as I rest my weary eyes...while freedom rings our flag still flies...
you give your all, do what you must...with God we live and IN God we trust....Amen.

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Old 01-15-2013, 08:06 PM   #186
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Quote:
Originally Posted by WillowPuss View Post
I have not experienced sub drop ... and, from the descriptions of it, hope I never do.

What I have found though ... after an intence (for us) period of play, I go really cold. Even if the room is warm .. I find myself feeling cold and shivery.

Is this normal? Do others have this? (Or am I just really odd?)
Oh yes, I have the same type of reaction, sometimes even when it's milder play.

Then again, could be that the bonus room where we typically play is super cold all the time.
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Old 01-21-2013, 07:22 PM   #187
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kathykitten View Post
Top-drop. That is so me.

With only reading through a few posts I knew exactly that it fit me, except I'm the top. I think it bottoms in some insecurity deep down questioning whether or not she truly loves me, or simply use me when she needs to feel belonging. I know even as I type it that it is ridiculous, we are mad about each other, but the feelings don't always follow my head. It's like a bodily reaction to something that doesn't fit with what I know is reality.

After intense play I can suddenly feel desperately lonely. Does she know how much I need my girl? hm...
Interesting
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Old 10-13-2013, 01:37 AM   #188
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Time for another bump
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Now I lay me down to sleep...one less terrorist this world does keep...
with all my heart I give my thanks...to those in uniform regardless of rank ...
you serve our country and serve it well...with humble hearts your stories tell...
so as I rest my weary eyes...while freedom rings our flag still flies...
you give your all, do what you must...with God we live and IN God we trust....Amen.

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Old 10-21-2013, 11:31 PM   #189
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I've only gone into sub drop a few times, most of the time it just takes some snuggles and kisses under a nice warm blanket for a few minutes and then I'm ok. There was one instance where I didn't get any aftercare and it was not something I ever want to experience again.

My opinion is that there should always be aftercare, regardless of the kink or lack of kink in the sex.
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Old 10-29-2013, 12:30 AM   #190
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I've heard the term, but thought that what I was experiencing was different because it's when the weekend is over. Actually, figured it was me being clingy or depressed. Tried my best to keep it to mysef up to this point because of that thought, although he's bound to find this post sometime... I'm lucky to get to the end of his driveway before the plunge in endorphins hits, then spend the hour+ drive home trying not to get into an accident from crying so hard. Thanks for the post; it will help knowing I'm not simply being a hormonal girly girl.
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Old 10-29-2013, 06:38 PM   #191
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ladyJ154 View Post
I've only gone into sub drop a few times, most of the time it just takes some snuggles and kisses under a nice warm blanket for a few minutes and then I'm ok. There was one instance where I didn't get any aftercare and it was not something I ever want to experience again.

My opinion is that there should always be aftercare, regardless of the kink or lack of kink in the sex.
Quote:
Originally Posted by ebunny15 View Post
I've heard the term, but thought that what I was experiencing was different because it's when the weekend is over. Actually, figured it was me being clingy or depressed. Tried my best to keep it to mysef up to this point because of that thought, although he's bound to find this post sometime... I'm lucky to get to the end of his driveway before the plunge in endorphins hits, then spend the hour+ drive home trying not to get inito an accident from crying so hard. Thanks for the post; it will help knowing I'm not simply being a hormonal girly girl.
Hi LadyJ and ebunny ~ I'm happy you checked this thread out. Please pass the information on. And enjoy the journey. :-)
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Now I lay me down to sleep...one less terrorist this world does keep...
with all my heart I give my thanks...to those in uniform regardless of rank ...
you serve our country and serve it well...with humble hearts your stories tell...
so as I rest my weary eyes...while freedom rings our flag still flies...
you give your all, do what you must...with God we live and IN God we trust....Amen.

R.I.P. WildRose70 Momma
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Old 10-21-2015, 11:26 AM   #192
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Bumping

Have a Happy Hump Day!
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My stories


Now I lay me down to sleep...one less terrorist this world does keep...
with all my heart I give my thanks...to those in uniform regardless of rank ...
you serve our country and serve it well...with humble hearts your stories tell...
so as I rest my weary eyes...while freedom rings our flag still flies...
you give your all, do what you must...with God we live and IN God we trust....Amen.

R.I.P. WildRose70 Momma
A link to her memorial
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Old 09-11-2016, 11:10 PM   #193
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Bumping Cause this is what I was looking for today and found it here...
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Old 09-12-2016, 01:13 AM   #194
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I needed this! I was literally coming to post when I saw this. Here's what happened anyway just in case it helps someone else, or someone else can help me. I'm off to read this thread.
Okay so I spent five weeks on vacation in my home state and found myself in this wild and surreal situation. It sounds so bizarre to me when I finally type it out (now that I can finally bring myself to verbalize everything), but through some odd circumstances here about a year ago, a mutual friend of ours ended up introducing (I'll call him Haven) and I. We chatted intermittently here and there over the computer, but nothing of major signifigance regarding much of anything and nothing sexual ever. Then one day (while on vacation)our mutual friend brought him back to her house. I honestly have no idea what happened. One minute I was doing laundry, the next I met him, within moments of that we were flirting and he was touching me pretty suggestively and I was letting him. Shortly after that, we found ourselves doing private things hard and fast in a private spot (Let me further clarify that this was the first time in NINE years I have been sexually intimate with another human being other than myself). It was intuitive on his part I'm guessing, to know exactly where and how to touch me. He wasn't completely gentle either - he pulled my hair and bit my neck right in that spot that makes me nearly drop to my knees. Something shifted. We had agreed that no hearts would get entangled, and they definitely didn't but there was a distinct moment where the balance changed. Someone was in charge, and it wasn't me. I found myself in this head space where I was absolutely wanting to do what he wanted me to do, and he made my body respond in a way I don't recall it ever having done before. It wasn't just the way he touched me, but the way he used his voice and what he said as well. He naturally took the dominant role in our bedroom activities. Outside the bedroom was a different matter. We all just hung out as friends, but there was still an undercurrent there between he and I. Little touches, nibbles, suggestive words, etc. A few times over a few weeks with him, plenty of time with my friends whom I love and adore, and then it was gone all at once. My daughter and I came home to a home with someone in it whom I love dearly but seriously grates on my nerves, a tree catastrophe, re-nesting ourselves, etc. and although I have been busy I have felt desperately lonely, depressed, angry, frustrated, and generally pretty much like crap. I tried rationalizing it all out, but discovered that logically there's really no good reason I should feel like THIS. I started analyzing, then second guessing every single one of my urges that fell outside the realm of "vanilla". Was I wrong for feeling these things? Was I crazy? Was this some sort of demented withdrawal I was dealing with? I'm not naturally a needy, clingy, overly emotional individual, so when these ramped up "psycho - PMS" feelings came along, I didn't know how to process any of it. I reached out to poor Haven (but I didn't and couldn't tell him what was going through my head because it sounded nuts to even me) as best I could without trying to come across as some needy, weirdo because I know he has at least SOME experience with this stuff. Then I went into shut down mode and the insomnia and the dreams came. Like really sexually vivid dreams. I would wake up out of one of those sweaty, thirsty, half there and half not, and feeling terribly empty and unfulfilled, completely unable to get back to sleep. In the morning I'd stumble out of bed, still thinking about the night before, suck down half a pot of jet fuel, go through all of my "daily motions" and while I was sitting there interacting with my kid, feeding the pets, cooking, laundry, with a smile on my face - inside I was confused, trembling, and grieving for something I couldn't put a name to. I know just enough about the world of BDSM to know a little bit of the terminology, so I went hunting for answers. FINALLY I think I hit on something that make sense. Apparently I am not crazy, I am not suddenly developing a condition that needs medication, and I am not wrong for my wants, needs, or desires. "Sub drop"? I found very little information, but what I did find ties in to a large degree. I just didn't know it could me me feel like curling up into a ball and hibernating from life. Anyone else ever deal with this?
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Old 09-12-2016, 09:56 AM   #195
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Thanks for sharing. I had read a little on aftercare and sub drop, but since it is something that I have never seen before I wasn't exactly sure how to prepare for something that may or may not happen..

Low and behold the other night after a session with my wife.. as soon as I untied her she began to cry... All I could do was hold her.. It reminded me of the way she could get sometimes when she was pregnant which made even more sense when i read about the endorphin rush that you are coming down from afterwards.

At this point she is just brushing it off but I want to be ready to deal with a worse case scenario just in case. I have been with my wife for almost 20 years and never seen her like this. I was glad I had read up on it some here and immediately knew what it was but it was still shocking to actually see for the first time.

http://forum.literotica.com/showthre...hreadid=304024 <--- link to the stickied discussions on this topic.
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Old 09-12-2016, 10:37 AM   #196
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More info I found : http://www.submissiveguide.com/2009/...motional-side/
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Old 09-12-2016, 11:31 AM   #197
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Sub drop hits people in different ways. Well done for finding out about it and doing some homework on it!

For me, usually after an intense scene with Master I just need lots of hugs and reassurance and warmth immediately afterwards.

There have been a few times I have had heavy impact play in public and the feeling was a bit different. The closest similar feeling to it is when I have been swimming a lot. I needed a warm blanket, liquid, a chocolate bar and a long long hug. The next day I felt a bit more tired than normal.

The top I played with the day before was still checking in with me that I was ok though. I understand that some people drop one or two, or several days later, so he was being very thoughtful.
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Old 09-12-2016, 01:59 PM   #198
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Thank you SalvDali for posting the extra links and LucyBee for your sharing your insights. It's making more sense to me now that I've been able to read further into it. This was something entirely new to me, as I've never been in that head space before, nor had I ever had to deal with the after effects. I truly don't think that the gentleman who this happened with had any idea he had that effect on me. He's new into all of this as well.
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Old 09-12-2016, 02:28 PM   #199
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LucyBee01 View Post
Sub drop hits people in different ways. Well done for finding out about it and doing some homework on it!

For me, usually after an intense scene with Master I just need lots of hugs and reassurance and warmth immediately afterwards.

There have been a few times I have had heavy impact play in public and the feeling was a bit different. The closest similar feeling to it is when I have been swimming a lot. I needed a warm blanket, liquid, a chocolate bar and a long long hug. The next day I felt a bit more tired than normal.

The top I played with the day before was still checking in with me that I was ok though. I understand that some people drop one or two, or several days later, so he was being very thoughtful.
Perfectly said. Absolutely kind.
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Old 09-29-2016, 11:53 PM   #200
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Wow, to learn there is a word for the feeling I have experienced but been afraid of discussing for fear of being judged stupid....

Thank you all for your open postings!
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