As The Hospital Pervs

[sweepthefloor]

Originally Posted by SaintPeter

You are scaring me.

Don't be afraid of me.

[sweepthefloor]

awwwwa drain-O

Originally Posted by blunt_trauma

i can crack my own back. ha!

where's the fun in that?

Originally Posted by sweepthefloor

Don't be afraid of me.

I think he should be...

[blunt_trauma]

Originally Posted by Kybele

where's the fun in that?

pissing off the stiff & sore man beside you the morning after.

Originally Posted by blunt_trauma

pissing off the stiff & sore man beside you the morning after.

there had to be a reason. *nods*

[sweepthefloor]

Originally Posted by Kybele

I think he should be...

I am a harmless thing. Sperm is cool.

Originally Posted by blunt_trauma

pissing off the stiff & sore man beside you the morning after.

Girl, you know that is not going to work. You are getting more flowers.

[sweepthefloor]

Radiologists are strange creatures. They sit in a dark room all day, looking at images of people’s insides. They are doctors who look at pictures.

Before the advent of the new computer dictation system that gives us access to the radiologists interpretation of these films: MRIs, CT scans, Ultrasounds, X Rays, the nurse would have to call this special dictation line and listen to the radiologists recorded voice rambling in monotone…..the findings, period, comma, next paragraph. Not all voices are equal, and neither is the impression.

I used to be the perving nurse…listening to CT results to rule out pulmonary embolisms (blood clots in the lungs) for other nurses when they were busy, just so I can listen. I would imagine the face behind the monotone, in a dark room, alone.

Now, the system works so well, that the radiologist dictates into a phone and the results appear on the computer almost immediately.

The radiologist still calls the nurse if the results are critical, for example: stroke, or a complete white out on the chest x ray. Sometimes they call if the report is negative, if it was a STAT test. I once even admitted to a radiologist over the phone, after he called me with results, that I had already listened to the negative report, and that I had a dictation line fetish. Yeap, I used that word fetish.

I almost walked down to the dark room that day, but as fate would have it, something else was going on... heart rate in the 180s with a tanking blood pressure ruined my plan, and I got busy.

I miss that dictation line.

I still like to read the interpretations, especially when they have creative vocabularies, and I notice the names of these faceless beings looking at pictures.

Todays Mystery Rad Man reads: “Bilateral pleural effusions, highly suspicious of congestive heart failure.”

Highly suspicious? You have got to be fucking kidding me.

I was smiling, because Mystery Rad could have said: “Bilateral pleural effusions indicating heart failure.”

I know, it is the little things that rock my socks.

[sweepthefloor]

[sweepthefloor]

Maybe he looks like this!

[Bert Notorius]

I'm standing at the food table at the BlahdeBlah Hospital Christmas party and Dr. Bombay (the Radiologist & not his real name) comes up to me and asks (in a perfect Simpson's Apu simulated voice), "Is there meat in that?"

[Garnate]

I just wanted to tell you that I thoroughly enjoyed reading through this thread. I even made my boyfriend read it and he's enjoying it, too. You have an interesting writing style and you're adorable.

There, I said it.

[SaintPeter]

More sperm cartoons!

[SaintPeter]

[SaintPeter]

[Garnate]

[SaintPeter]

[SaintPeter]

[Garnate]

[SaintPeter]

I shot my wad.

[sweepthefloor]

More sperm!

[sweepthefloor]

Originally Posted by Bert Notorius

I'm standing at the food table at the BlahdeBlah Hospital Christmas party and Dr. Bombay (the Radiologist & not his real name) comes up to me and asks (in a perfect Simpson's Apu simulated voice), "Is there meat in that?"

I would reply: Take me to the dark room and we can find out.

Originally Posted by Garnate

I just wanted to tell you that I thoroughly enjoyed reading through this thread. I even made my boyfriend read it and he's enjoying it, too. You have an interesting writing style and you're adorable.

There, I said it.

Thank you, I am happy you both enjoy it. I feel adorable.

Originally Posted by SaintPeter

I shot my wad.

Don't waste it...the wad has a home!

[sweepthefloor]

Originally Posted by SaintPeter

Noooo!

[sweepthefloor]

Originally Posted by Garnate

Goal!

[Bert Notorius]

Nothing paints the town quite like an exploding barium enema.

[SaintPeter]

Sperm Cartoons = death of Hospital Pervs thread