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Old 03-09-2005, 08:22 PM   #1
Metrodance
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For New Posters Only – Welcome to the GB.

Welcome to Literotica’s General Board – the place where the sexy, open-minded, witty and charming people gather. Well, some people here like to think of themselves that way. However, the majority just want to have fun, get to know people and talk about things that you can’t really discuss on the daily commuter grind.

Here are the basic rules of the forum as stipulated by the cyber gods Laurel and Manu. Forum Rules & Free Speech

Survival Tips.
1. Don’t trust anyone.
2. Don’t take any thing on face value.
3. Under no circumstances give anyone any personal details. Trust has been betrayed before with major consequences to the individual concerned.
4. Choose your friends a wisely.
5. Don’t try to read all the posts – it’s impossible and the content of the posts would drive you insane.
6. Don’t get stuck following a specific poster. Shop around. There are a lot of great threads and posts by unknowns who really add something to the board but haven’t penetrated the mass market yet.
7. Don’t over react to comments aimed at you or around you. When you take a step back, you’ll see the insults are kind of funny in a pathetic way.(Examples of such lame comments are bound to follow in this thread.)
8. Don't post from your employment. It's an easy way to get fired!
9. Finally, post succinctly and with tongue firmly in cheek.
Here is my evolving take on lit culture. Metrodance Guidelines for New & Established Posters

Some Basics.
You get an avatar after 100 posts. Some choose to wear one, others do not. Choose it wisely as it represents you to everyone else. Here’s a thread by an accomplished poster who sums up the avatar choices succinctly. The rest of the thread has it’s moments and introduces some of the personalities. Choosing an Avatar

Having difficulty putting up an av? Check the FAQ on your user panel. Here’s a thread with some details on it and worth reading because Weird Harold made an gruff appearance. Avatar Help

A hundred posts may seem daunting but it’s not really. Join in on one of the game threads. This is where the really cool people hang out and have fun while becoming comfortable with posting. Don’t listen to the nerdy group who claim the games are stupid, they are just deficient in the vocabulary and movie fact department and are constantly bowed down by peer pressure! They’re also jealous because nobody goes to their chess club at recess.

Try these games but read the rules first. Drop a Letter & Movies

Starting your own thread can be daunting and my advice is to avoid the Hi I’m new and fuck like an (insert animal/object here) thread. Believe me, it’s been done.

It’s not easy to begin threads that stimulate, enhance the reputation of the poster and, above all, entertain as well as retaining a sparseness of language with an ironic and pithy style.

However, there are a few posters who manage to do exactly that on a regular basis. Here are a few threads by two posters that will, perhaps, provide some constructive hints as well as entertaining you.

Examples: 1. 2. 3. 4.

There is so much more to the GB and so little time but the best way to learn is to begin posting and treat people as you would in real life.

One final tip, there are board relationships that have moved into real life so don’t pretend to be something or someone you’re not. You may just find someone here you might want to spend the rest of your life with and it would be nice if they wanted to do the same with you and not your fake board persona!

Welcome and have fun.
(And if you feel kind hearted towards new posters, you may bump this thread from time to time)

Last edited by Metrodance : 03-09-2005 at 11:00 PM. Reason: To add suggestions from Debbie & Sexygirl
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Old 03-09-2005, 08:24 PM   #2
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thank you!!!
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Old 03-09-2005, 08:34 PM   #3
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holy that took too much time

:: steals it for The Blank Manual ::
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Old 03-09-2005, 08:37 PM   #4
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I'm but a lowly noob, thank you for writing this.
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Old 03-09-2005, 08:38 PM   #5
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This should be made a sticky thread. Perhaps it should also be an official intro thread too for the newbies?
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Old 03-09-2005, 08:46 PM   #6
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good thread apart from the recommendation of the game threads
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Old 03-09-2005, 08:46 PM   #7
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glad to be here, thank you!!
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Old 03-09-2005, 08:52 PM   #8
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Thanks, this place is great! The people are great!
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Old 03-09-2005, 08:52 PM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by GirlMidnite
This should be made a sticky thread. Perhaps it should also be an official intro thread too for the newbies?
wow... a gb sticky? some one should post a poll.
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Old 03-09-2005, 08:54 PM   #10
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Now I feel at home, thank you MD.
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Old 03-09-2005, 08:56 PM   #11
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I found one major flaw in that whole write up.

All newbs are required by Lit Law to Show Their Tits. If they don't, they will forever be shunned by the Lit community known as the GB.
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Impossible is nothing
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Old 03-09-2005, 08:58 PM   #12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BlueSugar
wow... a gb sticky? some one should post a poll.

there won't be a GB sticky ... we'd need a moderator to do that and we don't have one ... or want one
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Old 03-09-2005, 09:01 PM   #13
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What about the newbies who don't have "a sparseness of language with an ironic and pithy style."

Are they welcome as well?
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Old 03-09-2005, 09:02 PM   #14
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sexy-girl
... we'd need a moderator to do that and we don't have one ... or want one
Exactly...it's part of the GB charm.
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Old 03-09-2005, 09:08 PM   #15
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Romial
I found one major flaw in that whole write up.

All newbs are required by Lit Law to Show Their Tits. If they don't, they will forever be shunned by the Lit community known as the GB.

Don't forget the cock pics if they are men..
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Old 03-09-2005, 09:10 PM   #16
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Queersetti
What about the newbies who don't have "a sparseness of language with an ironic and pithy style."

Are they welcome as well?
A small hardy grazing area ought to be set aside for them, but nothing more.
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Old 03-09-2005, 09:18 PM   #17
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Good idea. No 7 is an excellent one. A sense of humour is a wonderful thing to bring to the GB.

Metrodance, would you mind adding a wee bit about why it isn't always a good idea to post too much personal information or trust too easily on the GB?

I have tried to get the message across but I think it mainly falls on deaf ears or newbies haven't seen where trust has been betrayed or too much personal information has bitten some in the behind.


And yes this place has many good things going for it.
It isn't always the cesspool it gets referred to on occasion.

It's a great place to take your time and make good friends, interact with like minded adults, flirt, get advice, rant, politics, we even try to have an interesting discussion at least once a week. It can take some reading to find one but like a wee gem they can be found.
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Old 03-09-2005, 09:23 PM   #18
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You dont mind if I make my own rules do you Metrodance?

If I wanted rules....Id get married.
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Old 03-09-2005, 09:25 PM   #19
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Debbie
Metrodance, would you mind adding a wee bit about why it isn't always a good idea to post too much personal information or trust too easily on the GB?

I have tried to get the message across but I think it mainly falls on deaf ears or newbies haven't seen where trust has been betrayed or too much personal information has bitten some in the behind.

i agree with that ... and probably would add warnings about posting from work ... i know not everyone would listen to that ... but posters have lost their jobs because of that
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Old 03-09-2005, 09:47 PM   #20
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Jesus. Who died and made this the How To cafe?
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Old 03-09-2005, 09:51 PM   #21
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lasher
Jesus. Who died and made this the How To cafe?
The lucky thing is that unlike that poor excuse for a board, this "sticky" will float to the bottom like a used condom full of cold mayo.
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Old 03-09-2005, 09:54 PM   #22
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NonSexWithHer
The lucky thing is that unlike that poor excuse for a board, this "sticky" will float to the bottom like a used condom full of cold mayo.
mayo cum requires the sweet love of medical expertise.
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Old 03-09-2005, 10:38 PM   #23
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Thanks Metro....that was very nice of you to post this!
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Old 03-09-2005, 10:56 PM   #24
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Good suggestions Debbie and sexy-girl – added.
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Old 03-09-2005, 10:57 PM   #25
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NonSexWithHer
The lucky thing is that unlike that poor excuse for a board, this "sticky" will float to the bottom like a used condom full of cold mayo.

I think my stomach just curdled.
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