What do you feel when you are being /humiliated/dominated?
What is the feeling and the aim of being submissive to another person? How does it feel good?
Let's all share our feelings.
Cheesy!
However, being new to this...or not even new, just looking heh (yeah, chicken, right?), I'd like to thank all who responded to the cheesy questions above. Personally, I've been wrestling with this over and over for a while now .. ever since this one dude asked me the weirdest question a couple of months or so ago: 'what do I like?'. Don't know about for anyone else, but for me that question was an absolute mind-fuck. A dude who wanted to know what -I- liked? Was he for real? I mean, I'm not a spring chicken here and after a good 1/2 century of being on the planet, no one has -ever- asked me that question before. Especially regarding sex.
So, this begged the question .. do I be honest with him? Or .. should I just give him the stock 'block' response that keeps me nice and safe in my not-so-perfect-perfect-life? I could tell him what I -don't- like. That ones easy. I don't like dudes who can't take responsibility for themselves, who need someone around to blame for their mess-ups, who say one thing and do something completely different. I don't like dudes who are strung out on dope, unreliable, uncouth, undisciplined. But .. to admit even to myself what I like let alone tell someone else... now that's a challenge and a half.
So, for now, I'm looking and asking questions, and discussing and self-examining because really, I'm thinking that's what it all comes down to, isn't it? The self. Responsibility for the self, honesty with the self, acknowledgement for the self and finally acceptance and accountability .. for the self by two individuals who form a partnership based upon their -own- interwoven desires. At least, that's what I'm thinking. And perhaps the whys don't matter so much, as in many things when it comes to psychology and life. What matters is the 'is' far, far more than the why.
Kind of like admitting you like the colour red when everyone around you likes yellow and green and blue and, well, liking the colour red just means you might be that little bit strange. And admitting this .. oh my .. better hide .. how can -anyone- like the colour red? Perhaps they like the colour red because it reminds them of roses, or they can trace it back to that time when they were seven and someone didn't buy them the red dress, or some amazing shit like that. Perhaps it's because the nurse dropped them on their head when they were tiny, or the doctor who delivered them had red hair, or their parents had red wine on the day of their conception.
Who knows.
Anyways .. I said I'd like to thank those who replied because I gained a wee bit of insight even though it wasn't me who asked the questions or begged the responses. Was good hearing from y'all.