SissyKatie
Really Really Experienced
- Joined
- Mar 24, 2011
- Posts
- 301
It's nice to hear you have things balanced and worked out (or at least well on the way to it) at what I am guessing is a fairly early age Stacy.
When I was growing up (late 30s now) transgenderism wasn't recognised very much, and there was certainly no support for it.
Over the last couple of years I have had some 12 counselling sessions both privately and through UK NHS, and although I have been met with great sympathy and some useful advice, there is very little support, and there is no tying together this counselling with medical support from your GP.
So all the GP has to offer is CBT (a type of therapy which I am sure can be helpful applied properly, but has been no help at all to me) or SSRI medication (anti depressants which are supposed to be milder than the old kind, but knock me senseless and leave me without my - and seemingly with no - personality).
Although I recognised my gender identity 'differences' in my teens, I didn't realise how fundamental to me as a person they were until my early 30's. Like many people in times past, I would often try to 'sweep them under the carpet' and this seemed to work to differing degrees for certain intervals. But without fail things always came crashing down one way or another, and it became an unavoidable truth that they are and forever will be an important part of, and perhaps even at the centre of my life.
I am not sure where the future lies for me now. I sometimes find myself searching inside to see how I could rebuild my life in a more suitable way so I can be comfortable. About as far as I have got so far is the idea that working from home would be so much more suitable so I am free to be myself. That is something I am taking steps towards, so there is hope for the future (and hence this should not be a completely miserable post ).
The effects of my difficulties have been quite severe. Being MUCH more comfortable at home, alone, but free to dress as I wish, my social life began to diminish some years ago. Combined with depression that is about 70 / 30 the result of my gender situation, it has left me in quite an isolated state. For the first year of chronic depression I have found that friends want to support and will try to be there. On year two things seem to really be wearing thin with them, and in year three (as I am now) they begin to drop like flies and there is really no one except my mother I can rely on having any communication with at all now.
I do have a few things to cling to though (a love of music being the foremost) and I know things will come around. Sometimes when things have gone bad, you have to be able to really strip it all away before you can begin to rebuild. I am fairly certain I am close to being able to rebuild now.
And to end on a more pleasant note.... I do adore and embrace my desire and need for girly things, feminine things and expressing my inner self in various ways. I cannot possibly imagine being a different person, and there is much pleasure to be had from it all. I guess if I could change things, it would just be to recognise my situation more fully earlier in life, and to take steps to have shaped my life more to accomodate it.
It is a great thing that there is more support available these days for people having similar experiences. So the future is only looking brighter overall for all of us.
*sissy hugs*
When I was growing up (late 30s now) transgenderism wasn't recognised very much, and there was certainly no support for it.
Over the last couple of years I have had some 12 counselling sessions both privately and through UK NHS, and although I have been met with great sympathy and some useful advice, there is very little support, and there is no tying together this counselling with medical support from your GP.
So all the GP has to offer is CBT (a type of therapy which I am sure can be helpful applied properly, but has been no help at all to me) or SSRI medication (anti depressants which are supposed to be milder than the old kind, but knock me senseless and leave me without my - and seemingly with no - personality).
Although I recognised my gender identity 'differences' in my teens, I didn't realise how fundamental to me as a person they were until my early 30's. Like many people in times past, I would often try to 'sweep them under the carpet' and this seemed to work to differing degrees for certain intervals. But without fail things always came crashing down one way or another, and it became an unavoidable truth that they are and forever will be an important part of, and perhaps even at the centre of my life.
I am not sure where the future lies for me now. I sometimes find myself searching inside to see how I could rebuild my life in a more suitable way so I can be comfortable. About as far as I have got so far is the idea that working from home would be so much more suitable so I am free to be myself. That is something I am taking steps towards, so there is hope for the future (and hence this should not be a completely miserable post ).
The effects of my difficulties have been quite severe. Being MUCH more comfortable at home, alone, but free to dress as I wish, my social life began to diminish some years ago. Combined with depression that is about 70 / 30 the result of my gender situation, it has left me in quite an isolated state. For the first year of chronic depression I have found that friends want to support and will try to be there. On year two things seem to really be wearing thin with them, and in year three (as I am now) they begin to drop like flies and there is really no one except my mother I can rely on having any communication with at all now.
I do have a few things to cling to though (a love of music being the foremost) and I know things will come around. Sometimes when things have gone bad, you have to be able to really strip it all away before you can begin to rebuild. I am fairly certain I am close to being able to rebuild now.
And to end on a more pleasant note.... I do adore and embrace my desire and need for girly things, feminine things and expressing my inner self in various ways. I cannot possibly imagine being a different person, and there is much pleasure to be had from it all. I guess if I could change things, it would just be to recognise my situation more fully earlier in life, and to take steps to have shaped my life more to accomodate it.
It is a great thing that there is more support available these days for people having similar experiences. So the future is only looking brighter overall for all of us.
*sissy hugs*