The Author's Hangout Vending Machine

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But they didn't get the joke.

I put in an over-cued laugh track.

And you get a selection of sound effects LPs from the BBC.

I toss in an ah-oo-ga {You know what I mean.}horn and a couple of coconuts.
 
And you get a selection of sound effects LPs from the BBC.

I toss in an ah-oo-ga {You know what I mean.}horn and a couple of coconuts.

Ah - the Klaxon; such a useful warning, particularly in Fog.
Sadly, however, the sky is clear and the klaxon is silent [praise the Lord].


I put in a quiet fog horn
 
Ah - the Klaxon; such a useful warning, particularly in Fog.
Sadly, however, the sky is clear and the klaxon is silent [praise the Lord].


I put in a quiet fog horn

and you get a Carl Sandburg poem.

(The fog comes
on little cat feet.

It sits looking
over harbor and city
on silent haunches
and then moves on.
)


I put in an unfinished poem to Patricia...
 
and you get a Carl Sandburg poem.

(The fog comes
on little cat feet.

It sits looking
over harbor and city
on silent haunches
and then moves on.
)


I put in an unfinished poem to Patricia...


And she is still cursing the Postal Authorities, the transport system and you for not having received it - yet.


I put in a book of collected poems.
 
And she is still cursing the Postal Authorities, the transport system and you for not having received it - yet.


I put in a book of collected poems.

but it's missing the page which read,
"We must
We must
We must increase the bust."

I put in a wonder bra.
 
And you get a can of Dapper Dan left over from the "Oh Brother Where Art Thou" movie.






I put in a can of axle grease.
 
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