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Amen brotherYes,...I'm reading others words,..but they seem to flow like mine. I have 2 beautiful amazing young sons,...that I'll go thru hell before I leave them. But,...I really miss the touching,....warmth,...affection. Yeah, I know i sound all sappy,..but it's not just about the sex,...lol,..well,..mabe a part of it.
Thanks for listening, dc
Very sorry about this Shadow
Thanks Mr. Man. If only I could slip away to Columbus this week...
I feel your pain. My wife and I have not been intimate since 2004 and I am in need of some release badlyPlease do not judge me. I am 35, healthy, attractive and in a sexless marriage. My husband and I have not been intimate in over 3 years.
He has zero desire - you may speculate all you want but no I do not think he is gay, no he will not go to marriage counseling. I have gone on my own but it is hard to fix a marriage from one side. We otherwise get along, and yes there is a child which makes leaving very hard - especially since we otherwise function very well as a family!
That said, should I be complacent with with a life of celibacy? We are friends, get along but it is platonic? Maybe, maybe there is nothing really wrong with that?
I have has affairs - both long term and short and was left feeling empty, more alone than before.
Truly I want to LOVE(!!!) - hard, unabashedly, passionately, devotedly, endlessly. And I want to be so loved in return.
But maybe that isn't what marriage is about? Maybe what I have is as close to good as it gets?
Sorry for my late night and tipsy ramble ... I have had a few glasses of Pinot Grigio and I am waxing philosophic.
Oh I have started pulling this one and just demanding he let me have my way. I even offered a challenge to have sex everyday for a month straight to help us "Connect." Well that went out the window about two weeks in.
What a shame, I know plenty of men who would die to have a wife willing and ready for sex MULTIPLE TIMES A DAY!
Communication helps to get to the core of each other's personality, but if the other person has a hard heart filled with rejection, they won't be persuaded by the quality of the communication.This whole thread speaks to the disconnect between sex and love. Live and love is best when they cooccur. So much hurt occurs when they do not.
Is communication the answer?
The bee
I feel extremely sorry for you. Although my marriage has been non-sexual for the past eight years, it also had sexual problems from the start (we didn't have intercourse for the first seven years either), but it wasn't a problem dropped on us by circumstances beyond our control. My wife was at least in control of our non-sex, so I presume she was satisfied on some level, as opposed to your situation where you are both frustrated.This is an interesting thread.
I'm also married. Have been for almost 2 years now. My wife and I've been through a lot and I've stood by her side through a nervous break down, a wrongful institutionalizing due to the breakdown ( had to fight the state to release her ), several surgeries and health problems ( most recently a 10cm endometrioma that twisted and nearly killed her ). After the last, she no longer has a desire for sex due to the medication she has to take to prevent the cyst from coming back. ...
Life is complicated, every obstacle her and I've tackled has only presented something worse it seems like.
I would be happy to attempt to satisfy your sexual desires - a bit older than you, so if you choose to stay in marriage, your hubby wouldn't consider me a threatPlease do not judge me. I am 35, healthy, attractive and in a sexless marriage. My husband and I have not been intimate in over 3 years.
He has zero desire - you may speculate all you want but no I do not think he is gay, no he will not go to marriage counseling. I have gone on my own but it is hard to fix a marriage from one side. We otherwise get along, and yes there is a child which makes leaving very hard - especially since we otherwise function very well as a family!
That said, should I be complacent with with a life of celibacy? We are friends, get along but it is platonic? Maybe, maybe there is nothing really wrong with that?
I have has affairs - both long term and short and was left feeling empty, more alone than before.
Truly I want to LOVE(!!!) - hard, unabashedly, passionately, devotedly, endlessly. And I want to be so loved in return.
But maybe that isn't what marriage is about? Maybe what I have is as close to good as it gets?
Sorry for my late night and tipsy ramble ... I have had a few glasses of Pinot Grigio and I am waxing philosophic.
im in a similar situation. I get w bam thank you mam every 6 weeks or so. I think the wam bam is worse than celibacy. It becomes like a chore. It's like oh yeah we'll have to find time to do it. Kind of like mopping the kitchen floorPlease do not judge me. I am 35, healthy, attractive and in a sexless marriage. My husband and I have not been intimate in over 3 years.
He has zero desire - you may speculate all you want but no I do not think he is gay, no he will not go to marriage counseling. I have gone on my own but it is hard to fix a marriage from one side. We otherwise get along, and yes there is a child which makes leaving very hard - especially since we otherwise function very well as a family!
That said, should I be complacent with with a life of celibacy? We are friends, get along but it is platonic? Maybe, maybe there is nothing really wrong with that?
I have has affairs - both long term and short and was left feeling empty, more alone than before.
Truly I want to LOVE(!!!) - hard, unabashedly, passionately, devotedly, endlessly. And I want to be so loved in return.
But maybe that isn't what marriage is about? Maybe what I have is as close to good as it gets?
Sorry for my late night and tipsy ramble ... I have had a few glasses of Pinot Grigio and I am waxing philosophic.
im in a similar situation. I get w bam thank you mam every 6 weeks or so. I think the wam bam is worse than celibacy. It becomes like a chore. It's like oh yeah we'll have to find time to do it. Kind of like mopping the kitchen floor
i can certainly feel your pain....i went through similar in my marriage.....i used to refer to sex as "my wifely duties" because it felt like a duty.....i was always the one that had to initiate things because, i quote "i dont want to be rejected".
i always thought i was unattractive because he'd never seduce me and felt the lack of sex life was my fault.
when i headed towards my late 30s and my libido kicked in, it was very difficult as i had so many fantasies i wanted to explore with him but felt like such a pervert so kept the thoughts to myself.
it's now several years on and i'm divorced (his choice) and while i'm more comfortable in my sexuality, i do miss having someone special in my life...he was a good husband in other respects so miss the personality in my life.....hopefully i'll meet someone in the future, but until then the toys are great fun!
Good luck in your search and long live batteries!
got tired of reading all the posts but wanted to reply
Just nice to know that I am not the only one in a sexless marriage. Nearly 2 years here.
You always here about all you have to do is hint at a possibility of sex and a man is ready and willing. That is not happening here. I have bought new lingerie only to end up sleeping in it --cold and alone