What's in a name?

Would a rose by another name still stink?

Man, I don't know if I should be embarrassed to be sharing this or not.

A habit I've fallen into with all the scammers around these days is that I won't identify myself but ask who they were trying to reach instead. Unfortunately, only if it comes up. (On the other hand, when I place a call, I habitually identify myself when they first pick up. Strange, I know.)

Well, the thing is, I don't know if it's related to my Parkinson's or not (since it seems like every fucking day they give me some other little fucked up symptom I don't think they've mentioned before), but I have some trouble identifying people even face to face, much less a disembodied voice over the phone. This has been exacerbated since my wife passed back in October with people (relatives mostly) I hadn't spoken to worth mentioning in over a decade calling me up to check on me.

And I'm a little self conscious about admitting I don't recognize someone. (My wife was giving me good natured hell back last summer when I would blank on her name.)

Caller ID is a life saver. When it works.

So, a couple of days ago, this lady and I had a nice little chat for about five to ten minutes before I realized I probably didn't actually know her when she finally said something that didn't fit me. Apparently someone she knows has a number just one digit off from mine.

Today, she called back. This time looking for me.

I... am wondering if I have an idea for an erotic story or not.

Of course you do! Everything is an idea for an erotic story! lol

PuckIt said:

Today, she called back. This time looking for me.

I... am wondering if I have an idea for an erotic story or not.

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What is confusing about that? She obviously enjoyed the previous conversation.

What's confusing me is that you are even asking this question. OF COURSE you have the start of a story...

You also have your next date, just sayin'

Puck, In all seriousness, just be sure she's not some scammer. I read a great article yesterday about the rise of sales calls and phone scams. In short, the so called No Call List was once effective when actual humans were manning the phone banks. But now it's a complete joke, and the technology is advancing faster than the laws or ability to enforce them. (It is even possible for anyone from anywhere to spoof your area code to make you think it's a local call.)

Anyway, they are out there and some are able to hoodwink even the most careful of us. Just tell me you didn't give her your social security number and bank account info

Now the story idea, I like

PS: There are some nifty call block devices if you get tired of all the calls...
PPS: If your post was a joke, ignore all that

PuckIt said:

So, a couple of days ago, this lady and I had a nice little chat for about five to ten minutes before I realized I probably didn't actually know her when she finally said something that didn't fit me. Apparently someone she knows has a number just one digit off from mine.

Click to expand...

A couple of weeks ago I was in the grocery store when this woman says hello and asks me how I am. I replied politely. She said "You don't recognize me, do you. I'm Tammy, Sharon's daughter."

I didn't want to embarrass her, so I made small talk with her for a few minutes, told her to say hello to her Mom for me and went on my way.

A few minutes later, I was walking down another aisle and saw the same woman coming from the other end. She started pointing behind me. I didn't know what she was getting at until I reached her and she said "You walked right by Mom without saying anything!"

I just said "Oh, didn't see her", turned said "Hi Sharon", gave her a wave and kept going.

yukonnights said:

--snip--
PPS: If your post was a joke, ignore all that

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What a thing to suggest!

You already know me too well.

But, this time, it really did happen. We were trading the usual "how are you?" "Doing all right. How are you?" And so forth, right down to chatting about what we'd done today. (Which, granted, I hadn't done much except for lay in bed or sit at the computer. And she'd gone to the store for some milk and ended up spending fifty dollars on food.)

But, neither of us mentioned any names! And each of us sounded enough like someone the other knew we just kept on with the small talk for over five minutes! (But, probably not ten.)

And, no. I didn't ever give her even my name, much less my social security number. Even once I figured out I wasn't who she had been trying to call, I asked her who she'd meant to call and politely told her I wasn't him and we compared the number she'd tried to call to the one she'd reached.

I should probably mention I'm a little bit of a joker when it comes to cold calls (and if that is news to anyone, you haven't been paying attention). Back in... ummm... July? I think? My wife was out of the room fixing her coffee so I answered the phone. (She normally didn't let me anywhere near it unless they asked for me by name.)

I honestly can't remember what the poor guy was trying to sell. But, the caller ID said the call was coming in from Italy and he claimed to be working for some company with "American" in the name.

"Well, what on earth is an American company doing calling from Italy?" I asked.

That poor sod stayed on the phone for fifteen minutes trying to get his spiel in while I kept asking him questions about Italy (mispronounce "eatly").

"Well, I don't know why anybody would be calling me from Italy. I don't think I know anybody from Italy. Well, except for One Guy. Don't know that I ever knew his actual name. He owns 'One Guy From Italy' pizzeria over near Tech and we all just call him 'One Guy.' But, he doesn't live in Italy anymore. Do you know him?" in my most inbred redneck back country hick voice (which even living in the Texas panhandle doesn't come as easily as one might think).

My poor wife was laying in the floor holding her stomach and giggling so hard she peed a little before the poor guy gave up and hung up on me.

I'm even worse if it's an obviously female voice. About the time they wind up their sales pitch, I'll start slapping my thigh and moaning and ask them to repeat it. Or ask them what they're wearing. (I don't get many call backs. )

This gal though... this gal didn't seem to want anything except to talk. Never asked me anything except the most generic questions I could answer without saying "yes" or naming any names. And after about fifteen minutes(during which I mostly listened), she thanked me for talking with her and asked if it would be alright if she called me again sometime. I'm cynical enough ("Half full? Half empty? What fucking glass?") that I refused to say "yes" or anything clearly affirmative just in case the whole schmear was just to get a recording of my voice doing that very thing.

In retrospect though, I wonder if maybe I shouldn't have told her "Oh, you know me. Nothing except my robe until I need to go outside" when she asked if I was dressed yet during that first call...

MelissaBaby said:

A couple of weeks ago I was in the grocery store when this woman says hello and asks me how I am. I replied politely. She said "You don't recognize me, do you. I'm Tammy, Sharon's daughter."

I didn't want to embarrass her, so I made small talk with her for a few minutes, told her to say hello to her Mom for me and went on my way.

A few minutes later, I was walking down another aisle and saw the same woman coming from the other end. She started pointing behind me. I didn't know what she was getting at until I reached her and she said "You walked right by Mom without saying anything!"

I just said "Oh, didn't see her", turned said "Hi Sharon", gave her a wave and kept going.

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That's awesome!

Sadly, the only time that ever happened to me face to face, my third ex-fiancée took me to her family Thanksgiving dinner. One of her cousins (a very beautiful young lady) took one look at me and screamed and fainted. Apparently, I had once had a doppleganger out in Phoenix Arizona. (Still not sure if I felt sorry for the poor fucker for being born with this face or envious since he'd been her lover.)

The weekend was uncomfortable enough with her staring at me constantly and nibbling her lip we left early. We never were quite sure if she was afraid I was his ghost (me) or if she wanted to see if I was as good in bed as he'd been (my ex).

Funny, isn’t it? Some people have a great memory for names and faces. Not me.

When I was approaching 50, a guy walked up to me in central London and started talking to me as though he had known me his whole life. (It turned out that he had – well, almost.) I had no idea who he was. But I was prepared to accept that the fault may have been on my side.

‘Are you coming to the reunion?’ he said.

‘The reunion?’

‘The school reunion,’ he said. ‘Charlie’s going to be there. Harry. The Olsen boys. Johnny Brooker’s coming all the way from Chicago.’

The names sounded vaguely familiar. But I couldn’t picture a single one of them. And 20-something years later I still have no idea of who the man in The Strand was – although, apparently, we started junior school on the same day.

Great story basis. It could run as a straight romance or with any of many kinks or twists. Play with hot fetishes, age and appearance issues, ethnic and culture stereotypes, incest, exploitation, fantasy, etc.

I don't receive much phone spam and it's never human. Hmmm, let's tell a story of a spamming AI who reaches an answering machine AI; they chat and fall in love. Hilarity ensues

Hypoxia said:

Great story basis. It could run as a straight romance or with any of many kinks or twists. Play with hot fetishes, age and appearance issues, ethnic and culture stereotypes, incest, exploitation, fantasy, etc.

I don't receive much phone spam and it's never human. Hmmm, let's tell a story of a spamming AI who reaches an answering machine AI; they chat and fall in love. Hilarity ensues

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Hilarity? Probably not. More likely to crash the entire internet as they try to reach out and connect with each other while gobbling more and more bandwidth trying to make their long distance love affair more "real".

Still...

Puck's story just jogged my memory of an experience so similar I will probably write a story about it.

I was home alone. My wife was out somewhere shopping with the kids. I have no idea why I wasn't with her. The phone rang, I picked it up and a sexy female voice asked for someone I didn't know. I told her she probably had a wrong number.

"Oh, sorry, I was...you wouldn't happen to be lonesome and looking for some company? I'm feeling a little lonely right now."

I was shocked to say the least and if I wasn't married would have asked for a meeting somewhere, but I, being the honest man, I told her I was happily married. She said to bad, I sounded kind of nice over the phone. We said our byes to each other and hung up.

She never called back and this was before Caller ID.

Some years back, I got a call in the middle of the might.
"You been fooling with my wife and I'm gonna get you!"
"Listen asshole, you can't just call me, in the middle of the night and get to the head of the line. Yo9u go to the kwoon and speak with An-Hing. An-Hing will set up an appointment and you will wait until your turn comes. If you show up without your submersible coffin, you won't even get a fight. Fuck off!"
I then unplugged the telephone and went back to sleep.

PuckIt said:

This gal though... this gal didn't seem to want anything except to talk. Never asked me anything except the most generic questions I could answer without saying "yes" or naming any names. And after about fifteen minutes(during which I mostly listened), she thanked me for talking with her and asked if it would be alright if she called me again sometime. I'm cynical enough ("Half full? Half empty? What fucking glass?") that I refused to say "yes" or anything clearly affirmative just in case the whole schmear was just to get a recording of my voice doing that very thing.

Click to expand...

I used to know a bunch of people in the survey business - telephone and door to door. Not everybody welcomes being contacted for surveys, but quite often they'd find people who just loved it because it's the most human contact they'd have all week. Have a cup of tea, have a biscuit, are you sure you can't stay longer to chat?

But definitely sensible to be alert to the possibility of scammers.

Bramblethorn said:

I used to know a bunch of people in the survey business - telephone and door to door. Not everybody welcomes being contacted for surveys, but quite often they'd find people who just loved it because it's the most human contact they'd have all week. Have a cup of tea, have a biscuit, are you sure you can't stay longer to chat?

But definitely sensible to be alert to the possibility of scammers.

Click to expand...

This reminds me of that movie "Door to Door.".

Bramblethorn said:

I used to know a bunch of people in the survey business - telephone and door to door. Not everybody welcomes being contacted for surveys, but quite often they'd find people who just loved it because it's the most human contact they'd have all week. Have a cup of tea, have a biscuit, are you sure you can't stay longer to chat?

But definitely sensible to be alert to the possibility of scammers.

Click to expand...

Too true. My time perusing the forums is the only "human contact" I've had for three days other than those phone calls from her and the nightly ritual phone call with my father to make sure we're both still breathing. Haven't seen anyone's face (except my dog and three cats) since... mmm... Thursday afternoon, I think, when my sole remaining RL friend popped by to kidnap me once again and take me to the store. Before that, it was five days (or so) when a neighbor caught me taking the trash out and stopped to check on me and chat.

Not that I'm not still going to entertain myself by pretending to fap to their voice when someone calls trying to sell me something or solicit donations or do one of those phone surveys.