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His Snarky Porcupine
- Joined
- Dec 29, 2012
- Posts
- 13,947
What is he saying when he "Turns things around" and "Makes them sound like your fault"?
Because that's some vital information that would help us all out in advising you better. The more specific and detailed you are, the better.
The other night, his excuse for us not having enough time is that it was because I took a shower. My shower was 10 minutes, however, he did not make an effort to help me calm the children to get them into bed.
Other times, it's because dinner was ready too late, or I took a nap, even though he was sleeping at the time. It's not so much what he says, but it's how he says it. Sometimes, I feel that he is just setting things up like that so that it's an out for him. I'm not a paranoid person, so I usually let those things go.
Yesterday, I made it a point to make sure I had everything done around the house before the kids' bedtime. I did all my cleaning during the day(I usually don't, so he can sleep), so that I would just have a few dishes to do after dinner. I planned an easy dinner as well, so not much clean up from it. The kids did not need a bath before bed, since we stayed home all day. This way, I was ensuring that he and I had time to talk. Only one flaw in my plan. It was Sunday, which meant football on tv. So, no real talking got done, but I did make an attempt to sit and watch the game with him. Until one of his friends started texting him, and he was more interested in that conversation than one with me. At this point, I was fed up. He couldn't understand why. So, I point blank asked him if I'd ever get a night with him to myself, with no interruptions. His response was that she just texted him out of the blue. I told him a simple, "Sorry, I'm spending time with my wife." text would have ended the conversation. At that point, I went to bed. He stayed in the living room and watched the game some more, coming in to check on me after about an hour. Our youngest daughter was up coughing, so I ended up dealing with that the rest of the night.
Since it's snowing here today, he was called into work at 11am, but should be home by 11pm. Hopefully, he and I can talk some tonight. I know that these issues will not be wrapped up in a single conversation, but we need to get started on resolving them.