Unrealistic crap you see in movies that annoys you.

Background music. I walk around all day and there's never any orchestra following me and letting the world know my every little mood change.
 
Background music. I walk around all day and there's never any orchestra following me and letting the world know my every little mood change.

That's because you don't rate. Either that or you don't carry around an MP3 player and speakers in your backpack. Trust me people get a little freaked out when you walk into the room and your theme song kicks in.
 
That's because you don't rate. Either that or you don't carry around an MP3 player and speakers in your backpack. Trust me people get a little freaked out when you walk into the room and your theme song kicks in.

I do tend to randomly burst into song, though. And it's really cool when all your friends are there and they also break into song. Those times when you're really pissed and you feel like you live in a redneck town and you're like, "There's a hole in the world like a great black pit
and the vermin of the world inhabit it
and its morals aren't worth what a pig could spit"

And then your friend picks up and starts in on, "At the top of the hole sit the privileged few
Making mock of the vermin in the lower zoo
turning beauty to filth and greed.."

That does legit happen all the time.


You look like you'd leap out of your pants if someone popped a balloon near you, how can I trust you calmly walk away from explosions? Look I promise I'll invite you when we I I find myself forced to choose between visiting Silent Hill or Raccoon City. I figure your sufficiently unique that if I dedicate myself to getting you through so you can draw Minerva Mink dressed at Jessica Rabbit that my chances go from zero to 47.893%

What the actual fuck? I can totally walk away from explosions. Cool guys don't look at explosions. And as far as the zombie apocalypse... 1: They keep pushing that shit back and 2: I have far more zombie survival skills then just drawing. There's always a hot redneck guy who sacrifices himself near the end of the movie for the good of the group. That's me. I'm that guy. You need me for that, or you're gonna get killed in whatever it was I was gonna have to be sacrificed for.

Wait, no, you're the black guy. You had already died an act ago by the time we get to that part. It's gonna just be KRC (the girl) and some random child that we pick up along the way.
 
To be fair most action movies are never intended to be the least bit realistic. A realistic action movie would be about 10 minutes long. Much like a realistic haunted house movie.
When it comes to action movies, the entire movie Ultraviolet is the pinnacle of unrealism.
 
Martial arts movies exaggerate what martial arts techniques can do. This is dangerous because a teenage boy with one or two years of lessons may think that he can beat an entire street gang.

Only in the movies do teenaged boys with one or two years of lessons think they can beat an entire street gang.
 
I hate car scenes where the driver spends almost all of the time looking at the passenger. Ffs, check the traffic every so often!!!
 
Hackers that live tense, dangerous lives and break into systems with a few keystrokes. In real life they start a program and then watch a movie and eat some pizza and maybe take a nap while it works.
 
Hackers that live tense, dangerous lives and break into systems with a few keystrokes. In real life they start a program and then watch a movie and eat some pizza and maybe take a nap while it works.

I also like some of the sounds and graphics that they put on the hacker's computer screen. Like you're fighting digital monsters to get past the e-gate to the info you need.
 
In the movies every "smart" character knows everything about everything. Like the professor on Gilligan's Island.

People always have underwear on after sex and/or strategically placed sheets and it's never ever smelly or dirty and there's never a wet spot.
 
I also like some of the sounds and graphics that they put on the hacker's computer screen. Like you're fighting digital monsters to get past the e-gate to the info you need.

And there's always some sort of timer because the programmers apparently thought ahead and put one in just so the hackers would feel rushed.
 
Science Mad Libs. People that take technical terms and form a sentence with them that makes no sense at all. I like science fiction to have actual science in it. Otherwise call it fantasy and say "A Wizard Did it" and not stuff like:

"It's the result of the gravity wave!"

I'm lookin' at you, Loopers. Your theories about time travel suck.
 
These might have been already posted -


Movies where the bad guys take on the hero one by one instead of rushing him together. Seagal movies come to mind.

Women dying in the hospital of some horrible disease with full makeup and perfect hair.
 
These might have been already posted -


Movies where the bad guys take on the hero one by one instead of rushing him together. Seagal movies come to mind.

Women dying in the hospital of some horrible disease with full makeup and perfect hair.

Women sitting in a corner during a fight looking terrified. "Pick something up and brain someone!"
 
Revolution: Or - "Hot Tea Partiers Who Don't Understand Science"

The Earth has had no electricity for fifteen years. How are you curling your hair, applying makeup, wearing crisp, clean designer clothing?

And...why are you packing glass bottles into a backpack?

Had to stop watching.
 
I hate when the POTUS becomes directly involved in the action, can't remember the movie but there was one where he had to fly an attack mission on an alien craft. It's an annoying throwback to the tribal days when the big man was also the war leader and chieftan.
 
How dinosaurs apparently think people are made of crack. I mean seriously they seem to go truly absurd lengths to eat people when there are often slow moving gunless herbivores all over the fucking place. Also how the herbivores are almost always docile when in real life big herbivores have a habit of being genuine dicks.
 
Sex on the beach. Apparently, no woman ever gets sand in her pussy and has to stop fucking.
 
I hate how the Federal Government can't seem to accomplish anything without the following window dressing:

1. a big "war room" with a huge screen on which they pinpoint the hero's every move.

2. a pounding soundtrack of kettle drums.

3. a lot of helicopters taking off and landing throwing maximum dust.

4. hordes of extras in full tactical assault gear with someone always hollering "go! go! go!"

5. a bunch of agents somehow wearing Italian suits on GS payscale.
 
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