Who knows what "Morning Wood" means?

NotWise said:

I'm familiar with it, and I'm in the next older generation and in the US southwest, so it's neither generational nor regional. It could be an Americanism.

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Aussie men have had morning wood* for decades, so no, it's not exclusively Yank.

* 'morning glory' is also common here.

NotWise said:

As near as I can tell, women aren't usually into morning wood. They might be more likely to say "Get off my back, go pee, and leave me alone." Breakfast and coffee are more exciting.

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... or at least just 'go and pee' ... I had an unfortunate experience once that's made me extremely cautious about the early morning blow job ever since.

I would think anyone on this site would know what "morning wood" is. I have also heard it called a piss hardon.

I may be the only author here who ever described a woman as having morning wood.

I think morning wood is universally understandable (makes me wonder now about my early school years at Morningwood Elementary).

I wonder if the kids these days know what a 'bearded clam' was, since (Hallelujah!), shaving is more the norm these days. I do not miss those Amazon Rainforests of yesteryear.

Question

With regard to "morning wood", how is it that I often require the substance in a blue pill but I wake up with a woodie and no pill has been taken?

Bigspurt said:

With regard to "morning wood", how is it that I often require the substance in a blue pill but I wake up with a woodie and no pill has been taken?

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It's a gift from Phallusius, the great god of erections, and should be regarded with the same reverence reserved for gift horses.

latecomer91364 said:

I think morning wood is universally understandable (makes me wonder now about my early school years at Morningwood Elementary).

I wonder if the kids these days know what a 'bearded clam' was, since (Hallelujah!), shaving is more the norm these days. I do not miss those Amazon Rainforests of yesteryear.

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"Bearded clam" - omg, I have NEVER heard that one before and I just singed the inside of my nose with hot coffee. That's .... omg I'm laughing so hard. This is better than researching alien dicks. Which I guess answers your question in part.

latecomer91364 said:

I think morning wood is universally understandable (makes me wonder now about my early school years at Morningwood Elementary).

I wonder if the kids these days know what a 'bearded clam' was, since (Hallelujah!), shaving is more the norm these days. I do not miss those Amazon Rainforests of yesteryear.

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The last time I heard that expression was back in high school...late '60s.

Bigspurt said:

With regard to "morning wood", how is it that I often require the substance in a blue pill but I wake up with a woodie and no pill has been taken?

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Short simplified answer: our bodies can do a lot of different things, but they can't do all of them at once. If we want to power up one function (say, pump blood fast to the limbs so we can run away from danger) then we need to power down another (say, digestion).

So we have a couple of nervous systems that act in opposition to one another. The "sympathetic nervous system" stimulates fight-or-flight type responses, the "parasympathetic nervous system" stimulates rest, feeding, digestion, excretion, and sex. But each of those systems also suppresses the activity governed by the other one.

(Mostly, that is. Like most things biological, it's a complicated tangle of stuff and there are exceptions, and my physiology is too rusty to give a perfectly accurate summary of this stuff.)

So, you're feeling hungry and then suddenly you get a nasty fright - your SNS says "wake the fuck up, shut down the digestive systems, pump blood to the limbs so we can run away from this bear that's trying to eat us, and for fucksake switch off that erection, now is not the time for sex". Even if you were ravenously hungry a few minutes ago, suddenly you're not noticing that hunger any more, and that erection will vanish very quickly.

Most of the time, both your SNS and PSNS are active to some degree, counterbalancing one another so your body can multi-task. This means that your SNS is sending out erection-damping signals at low volume.

For younger guys in good health, those signals aren't very loud, and other stimulation can overcome them to produce an erection. But if there are other factors working against your ability to get an erection, those SNS signals may tip the balance and make it hard or impossible.

When you sleep, your SNS is usually at low activity and your PSNS is on high, so there's less to inhibit an erection. And when you're dreaming (REM sleep), certain parts of your brain switch off; this is why, most of the time, you can dream about walking and talking but your body doesn't do those things.

So the hypothesis - not proven - is that sleep and especially REM make erections easier because they're dialling down the parts of the brain and nervous system that inhibit erection.

A full bladder can also stimulate some of the nerves involved in erection.

Bramblethorn said:

Short simplified answer: our bodies can do a lot of different things, but they can't do all of them at once. If we want to power up one function (say, pump blood fast to the limbs so we can run away from danger) then we need to power down another (say, digestion).

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Remember also that in a man, there is only enough blood to safely operate one head at a time....

Dollie

coachdb18 said:

Can't wait to see what happens when I bring up the term 'wet dream' LOLOLOLOL

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I think that's why many men have morning wood. It happens during a wet dream.

SamScribble said:

Such sweet memories.

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At least we still have those. I'm beginning to loose my memory too soon. I thank my husband and Lit for helping to remember.

electricblue66 said:

Remember also that in a man, there is only enough blood to safely operate one head at a time....

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This is only partly true. It's those sexy ideas on a man's mind that pumps the blood to his little head.

electricblue66 said:

Remember also that in a man, there is only enough blood to safely operate one head at a time....

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Empirical evidence and personal experience lead me to believe the truth of this observation.

ChloeTzang said:

Empirical evidence and personal experience lead me to believe the truth of this observation.

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I'm a man saying it, I know it to be true!

LIVINRFANTASIES said:

This is only partly true. It's those sexy ideas on a man's mind that pumps the blood to his little head.

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Yeah, but once the blood is pumped below, the upper brain is useless for the duration...

electricblue66 said:

Yeah, but once the blood is pumped below, the upper brain is useless for the duration...

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At that point, empirical evidence and personal experience lead me to believe that it's not only blood that's being pumped. Upper brain functions at this point are no longer a requirement for either participant and can safely be discarded for the duration. The ability to substantially verbalize is also over-rated at this point.

Altho making the coffee afterwards would be a nice gesture.

latecomer91364 said:

It's a gift from Phallusius, the great god of erections, and should be regarded with the same reverence reserved for gift horses.

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Yes, a reverent remembrance is appropriate!

ChloeTzang said:

The ability to substantially verbalize is also over-rated at this point.

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Oh, I dunno. I like to have my brain engaged. I've always found a few words at the right time to be very effective. You can't think about baseball or your grocery list if your partner is in your ear as well as in your... well, you know.

ChloeTzang said:

Altho making the coffee afterwards would be a nice gesture.

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Now that I agree with!

Back in the 70's, when I was still in boarding-school in England, 'Morning Wood', 'Woody', 'Morning Glory' were all well-understood slang names for the first show of the day. Your editor is either mordantly ignorant, has no idea how to use the internet for basic research, or, as I think most likely, is one of those snotty twerps who couldn't pass up an opportunity to take a dig at an American for daring to use an 'Americanism' in an 'English' story. Tell him to piss off and learn how to Google.

(Sidebar: One of my professors at medical school once told us that 'torque' could most graphically be demonstrated by observing the way your heels came up off the ground when pushing down your morning erection to take a pee...)

............