Fuck Francis Ford Coppola and Al Martino too...

Edward Teach

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Joined
Aug 29, 2003
Posts
3,157
I was channel surfing Monday night and came across Godfather III just as Al Martino was singing that fucking-piece-of-shit song, “ To Each His Own.” It played in my head until I downloaded five fucking versions of it on Limewire.

I now have Al Martino, Vic Damone, The Platters, The Inkspots and the original 1946 hit version by Tony Martin on my computer.

I have a fucking play list playing the goddamn songs on repeat every minute I am on this addictive fucking machine..

I made a CD of the shit and now have the “five versions” playing continually in my car.

I almost took it into my office but, at the last second, summoned the will to refrain ( I honestly didn’t intend that pun – I am cracking up).

Wondering where I could go for comfort, understanding, advice and free therapy, I of course thought of the AH. So here I am.

HELP!

Sorry, gotta run.

A rose must remain, With the sun and the rain, Or it’s lovely promise won’t come tr……

Ed
 
I'm 'enry the eighth I am
'enry the eighth I am, I am
I got married to the wi'ow next door
she's been married seven times before
and every one was a 'enry, 'enry!
Nary a Willy or a Sam
I'm the eighth old man, I'm 'enry
'enry the eighth I am, I am
'enry the eighth I am
 
minsue said:
I'm 'enry the eighth I am
'enry the eighth I am, I am
I got married to the wi'ow next door
she's been married seven times before
and every one was a 'enry, 'enry!
Nary a Willy or a Sam
I'm the eighth old man, I'm 'enry
'enry the eighth I am, I am
'enry the eighth I am

Oh, that helps, but I still have my headphones on playing TEHO - Please don't take my headphones away. Please

Edward The Obsessed
 
Edward Teach said:
Oh, that helps, but I still have my headphones on playing TEHO - Please don't take my headphones away. Please

Edward The Obsessed
I understand. Limewire is a beautiful thing for the obsessives among us. Playing it nonstop is the best way to rid one of evil earworms. You're much kinder than I. I never use headphones. :D
 
minsue said:
I understand. Limewire is a beautiful thing for the obsessives among us. Playing it nonstop is the best way to rid one of evil earworms. You're much kinder than I. I never use headphones. :D

How is your neice? PM if you'd rather. Ill be around for a while.

Keith
 
Edward Teach said:
How is your neice? PM if you'd rather. Ill be around for a while.

Keith
She's totally fine, you'd never know what she went through. Still fearless. I adore her. :heart:
 
minsue said:
She's totally fine, you'd never know what she went through. Still fearless. I adore her. :heart:


I am so glad to hear it. She must take after her aunt. Isn't she named after you?
 
Edward Teach said:
I am so glad to hear it. She must take after her aunt. Isn't she named after you?
She does, but more in looks and smart assed retorts. I was never fearless. And, nope, not named after me. Just looks freakishly like me. :D
 
Hey Teach. I recommend that the only solution to that kind of problem is trepanning. It's the only way to release the evil.

The Earl
 
Edward Teach said:
I was channel surfing Monday night and came across Godfather III just as Al Martino was singing that fucking-piece-of-shit song, “ To Each His Own.” It played in my head until I downloaded five fucking versions of it on Limewire.

Don't fight it. It sounds to me like you're suffering from an acute lack of melody and your body's trying to compensate by sucking up whatever tune it can find in a desperate attempt to compensate.

"To Each His Own" was written inear the end of the what they call the age of the Great American Songbook, and even though it's not a first-rate example of the best of that era, it's from a time when songs were crafted with remarkable care and often stunning beauty, especially regarding melodies. Unfortunately, "To Each His Own" has that annoying back-and-forth melodic pattern that quickly gets annoying. You just have to find something better to substitute for it melodywise.

We've totally lost our capacity to appreciate or even hear melody these days, and all we have in pop music now is rhthym, effects, and maybe a bar or two of enough melody to serve as a hook or earworm. Songs are engineered now, not written, and the melodic geniuses of the 30's and 40's are all gone, just like the renaissance painters. Singers no longer concentrate on interpreting melody since there's none to interpret, and so what we get instead is the ridiculous vocal pyrotechnics known as melisma (a medieval term, by the way). You know melisma. It's that horrible stuff you hear them doing on "American Idol" whenever they open their yaps, a technique stolen from Gospel and turned into something grotesque, where the singer's voice wanders above, below, around under and through the note. You hear it on just about every pop song these days, and it's there because the singers are instinctively trying to fill the void left by the absence of melody.

I wouldn't want to have "To Each His Own" stuck in my ear either (and I never liked Vic Damone), but I'll gladly wander around for days with Sinatra's "Everything Happens to Me" or "Autumn in New York" stuck in my head, or even Johnny Mathis doing "My One and Only Love" or "Moonlight in Vermont" or any of those other songs that I used to think were just too corny to be endured. As a guitarist, sometimes I'll pull out an old fake book and just run through the chords for these songs--beautifully constructed, lush and sensual and a delight just to play.

I also love these songs becuase I recently discovered the kind of dancing that goes with them. "To Each His Own" is a bit too bright, but the slower songs... You just put your arms around her and hold her close and sway - you don't even have to move you feet - and feel her thighs moving against yours as the music envelopes you and you realize why people used to dance this way. Music wasn't always albout violence.

So I'd suggest you get a hold of some Sinatra or Johnny Mathis or Tony Bennett to cure your earworm. I really think you migt be suffering from an Acute Melody Deficit.

--Zoot
 
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Yeeek! Zombies! The dead threads are rising again! Get your shotguns, .44 Magnums and axes! :eek:
 
Yeeek! Zombies! The dead threads are rising again! Get your shotguns, .44 Magnums and axes! :eek:

Not SNP, TE!! She's too cute and lively to be a Zombie. She was just dropping by to say hello and will probably respond to some tender loving. Well, maybe a few swats to that beautiful ass of hers also. :D

Damn, she's pretty!
 
Not SNP, TE!! She's too cute and lively to be a Zombie. She was just dropping by to say hello and will probably respond to some tender loving. Well, maybe a few swats to that beautiful ass of hers also. :D

Damn, she's pretty!

:kiss::cattail::kiss::cattail:
 
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