Dear X,

BlueSugar

Faceted Sensualist
Joined
Jun 13, 2003
Posts
7,608
Dear Citris County,

You fucking suck for being huge cocksuckers and not looking into which fucking redneck employeed to you didn't file the right paperwork to put an innocent loving caring person close to my heart, who can't afford a goddamned lawyer- in jail without reviewing the file so that you can see he isn't a fucking flight risk. I swear to god you will feel my wrath and fury if you keep him in florida away from his life in new york. And please stop charging me $86 for every 6 collect phone calls.

I hate you.

You're a douchebag,
blue


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Dear My Body,

Why did I have a miscarriage? No doctor can figure it out, I'd appreciate if you told me so I don't hate myself for the rest of my life. I'm having trouble moving on, please help me see the light.

Hurting and confused,
blue


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Dear Grevious Mistake College,

Please let me graduate, I don't need something else on my mind right now. Please let one thing come easy. I'd really appreciate it. I know that 19 credits and a 3.15 is tough, but I promise to pay my loans on time if you let me graduate so I can have a full time job.

In debt to you enough,
blue

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Dear My Brother's Wife,

I hate you. I have always hated you. You're a cunt for lieing to us for three years. Stop stealing medication from us, grow a set, and move on with your life. You've hurt us enough. Please leave without a fight, you already lied and stole from my brother and family enough that he can't get on his own feet to start over unscathed.

I tried to accept you,
blue


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Dear The Nor-easter headed my way,

Please drop a shit-ton of snow so classes are canceled. I need a personal day.


Crossing my fingers,
blue


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Dear Landlord,

Stop rasing my rent. My class schedule in my last semester is too demanding to keep a job. I can't afford another raise if property taxes go up for you. Please leave me alone till may so I can move out on your stingy ass.

Get off my back,
blue


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Dear Room Mate,

I'm sorry your mother has cancer. But that is no excuse to not do the dishes ever, never take out the garbage, never pick up the mail, and play WoW all fucking day. Yes, I know nursing school is difficult, but, please help me every now and then.

I'm not your wife, maid or keeper,
blue

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Dear Vondage,

Please magically work in my town sometime soon. I find it retarded to pay $30 to only make local calls in my town using verizon. I'd really like to switch to your service so I get caller ID, call waiting and long distace services for the same price.

Waiting,
blue

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Dear Lotto,

I swear I'll give half to charity, cancer research, etc..., I don't care what the amount is. I need a little help.

Your Faithful Player,
blue

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Dear Lit,

Write as many or as few Dear X's, as you want... I've seen this done on other sites. Much like a blurt thread. But with a bit more structure. No need to answer other peoples unless they write to you I guess. This is more of a 'venting' thing.

Thanks for letting me vent.

Have fun,
blue
 
I feel for you, Sugar

Vent all you want.

Dear DCSS Lawyers & Judges,
Thanks for taking away my driver's license, even though you promised you wouldn't, and even though I owe NO money to you, and not even telling me you did it! Thanks for taking all my retirement money and giving it to my Ex, even though she and my kids don't need it nearly as much as I do. Etc, Etc. May you all rot in hell, you bitches and bastards! :devil:
 
I can understand your need to vent

Dear head,

Please stop hurting. I know I have a spinal problem and I know the position I'm typing this in isn't really helping any, but give me a frickin' break. I'd like to have one day, better yet, one week without a headache of any kind. Just go away pain

Sincerely,

The owner of your brain

KR

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Dear roommate,

You are a wonderful person when I don't have to deal with you constantly. Please remember to take your sleeping pills on time so I don't have to deal with you sleeping at 2:00 pm when I would like to have the lights on. For goodness sake please go to all of your classes. There is a reason you had such a low grade point last quarter and that's because you didn't go to class. Oh, and I would appreciate it if you went home more often for the weekend so I can have sex more than once or twice a month. You may not have anyone to sleep with, in any sense of the phrase, but please just go find a friend to sleepover with, preferably for the whole weekend so I can get laid without worrying whether you'll come into the room at any second.

Leave me alone please,

KR

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Dear weather,

Please decide on a consistent pattern and make this spring early, long, and warm.

From a member of the world,

KR

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Dear friend's roommate,

Please leave the room for longer than meals and classes. You may not remember me as more than a member of what could have seemed like a threesome (and in fact was) that you were sexiled from your room for an hour for earlier this year or the girl that comes in with your roomie every once in a while. I beg you to please let him have the room to himself for a while at least once a week so he can masturbate in peace or have sex with me in some place other than my room. The ratio of my room occurrences to occurrences in his room must be about 4 or 5 to 1, or possibly even larger. Go back home for the weekend every national, three-day weekend holiday. This next weekend would be really great.

That girl,

KR
 
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Dear beloved daughter,

It's your first day at uni, and your first time living away from home....you will be homesick and lost for the first few days, but you will make new friends and learn so much.....I wish I could hug you :(

Mum :heart:
 
Dear Hospital my father just got admitted to this morning,

Don't let him die from a heart attack, that would be too simple. He has had 3 different cancers, shock therapy, is an alcoholic, gout, is manic, is skitzo, isn't allowed to go to church anymore because he gets flashbacks from when a priest abused him, is deemed medicinial failure (so not even brandy new experimental drugs work on him for more then a few months), did chemo 4 times, is on chemo now for psoresis, the psoresis is a manifestation of something they can't identify in his lungs... he was told he wouldn't make it past 1990, its 2007...and still smokes a pack or two a day.
A heart attack would just be cruel, because hes survived everything else. How about the chicken pox? He has never had that, oddly.

Hope that doesn't make me sound like a bad daughter,
blue


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Dear Supreme Court,

Vote in favor of my family's case. If he dies, we have zero money. We've been fighing this battle since the 1990s when my father first got sick, and they missed filing papers by a couple days and you locked them out of payments they were supposed to get to help us live.
It be super cool if you voted with us, a bunch of judges in a law magazine did but for some reason it still went up to you guys... be nice... they owe us all that back pay. We'd like to have a nice funeral for him if it comes to that. My mother hasn't been able to have a job because hes always needed constant care for one ailment or another so we have next to nothing saved.

Don't be like florida,
blue

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Dear Snow Storm,

Please, please snow the crap out of us. I REALLY need a day off.

Begging you,
blue

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Dear Shitstorm,

Please, please cut it out. I had no intention of writing anymore sad Dear Xs, and was seeing last night as the bottom hoping to climb my way back up again. But, I was wrong, thanks.

Knock it off,
blue

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Dear Father Time,

Can we skip a few years, like, say, make it... 2014 or something... I'm really done with my 20s even though they just started. I'd like to be 30 something, surely people who make my life miserable will be dead, court cases could have been one, insurance money from their will's could be collected... and I can finally start living life, instead of mearly trying to survive it.

It would really rock my socks,

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Dear Joe Pesci,

If this works for George Carlin, I'll pray to you too. I need something to believe in, because lately, I can't even trust myself. I need to get out of my own head but find psychotherapy pointless. Been there, done that, learned I just have to roll with the punches. I'm not depressed persay, just in a rough spot. Give me a small good to hold onto. Because of the miscarriage, I can't even say "at least I have my health," I just don't trust my health like I used to.

I don't think you're a clown, or here to amuse me,
blue
blue
 
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Dear Customer,

It's 2 days before Valentine's Day, did you really expect our store to have the exact thing you wanted for your significant other? It's been on the shelf for 2 months and you wait until today to shop and wonder why it's gone. I bet you wait until Dec 24 to shop for Christmas gifts and get disappointed then as well.

Your Cashier

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Dear Feet,

You've been attached to my body for almost 40 years with little complaints. I know I've not worked in nearly 15 years, but you'd think after 3 weeks of working 8 hour days, you'd be a bit more used to it. Suck it up and get over it and stop acting like you're about to fall off.

The rest of my body

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Dear Volunteer,

When you call to offer help and ask for a date, time, and place as a message on my answering machine, giving your phone number really facilitates a swift response. You called from the military base which always shows up on caller ID as all 9's...a number which doesn't exist. You're smart enough to be a computer programmer....now be smart enough to actually give me a contact number!

Girl Scout Leader

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Dear China,

What is it with all the pollution you're putting in the air? The sand storms from the Gobi Desert picks that crap up and shifts it into Korea where my husband is currently stationed. If my husband picks up some freaky illness while there, I'm gonna go over and kick all your asses :D

Concerned Wife

-----------------------------------------

Dear USAF,

Pull your collective heads out of your asses. If a person doesn't qualify to receive DLA....don't give it to him and then say "oops" and ask for it back!! I don't have $1300 lying around because you're a bunch of dumbasses and don't know your own rules. You screwed up...live with it

Military Spouse
 
Great thread!

Dear Ex,

Why did you call and wish me a Happy Valentine's day today? You know that I am still trying to get over you, and I almost succeeded, but now you confuse me even more by calling me out of the blue and wishing me a Happy Valentine's day. I was hoping to just et to midnight today without thinking of you once, and you ruined it for me.
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Dear Jewish Studies Professor,
Why do you assume that all of the students in your class are Jewish? Sometimes you need to explain stuff, and when I ask you to explain certain things, please don't roll your eyes.
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Dear Recent ex,
I miss you. A lot. Please realize what you had with me. You are better off without her. I respect your decision, trust me I do, I just hate to see you being dragged down in all of her problems. You are not responsible. Even if you're not with me, please find someone besides her who will make you happy.
 
Dear Sandman,
Please please let me sleep before work today, insomnia is a bitch, but doubly so when you work nights.




ps, if you have any connections can I wake up without pain.
 
Dear kids,
Keep your dirty sticky filthy fingers off the fucking monitor.
Love dad. ;)
 
Dear Verizon Correction Line,

You are an automated service, who doesn't leave messages on phones to tell you something needs to be corrected. Fix that. I didn't know I couldn't receve calls today and nearly gave myself a heart attack trying to see if the love of my life was ok.
Since you are an automated service, nearly up to the very last step- and then you allow me to talk to a human... why don't you, after hours, make the service fully automated... so when I figure out you shut me off, I can fix it and NOT CAUSE MYSELF TO HAVE A FUCKING HEART ATTACK!!!

Oh, and you cheated me out of my Valentine's call too. Thanks, thanks alot. I barely have ANYTHING to hold onto, and you took that away from me too.

Blow me,
blue
 
Dear Son,
Please, please, please work very hard to keep this new job. I'm your mom and I'll love you no matter what. But I'm so tired of being disappointed in you. You need to expect more of yourself. I don't want to see you waste any more time. For your own sake, grow up!

Love, Mom

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My dear friend,
I know you're afraid, and I'm afraid for you. Please take care of yourself. I need you to be around for a long time.

Love, The Nag
 
Dear whoever the hell decides on holidays,

Can we please remove Valentine's Day from the list? I know it brings in quite a bit of revenue, but it makes me feel like shit. Can we please have a revote on that one?

Single,
tbs
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Dear Friend,

Please don't like her more than me. I am a jealous and possessive friend. I couldn't bear it if you liked her more than me. Anyone but her. She's not good enough for you, trust me on this one...she has issues.

From your friend with the issues,
tbs
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Dear Mom,

Act your age and get over it. I'm the daughter, I have the right to be confused and angry at you, not the other way around. Screw the whole respect thing. I'm old enough that you have to start earning it.

Your overindulgent daughter,
tbs
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Dear ex friend with benefits,

I feel cheated, you got all the benefits. There should be some kind of compensation for this. Also, please stop stalking the females in my family, it's creepy and weird.

Angry Black Woman,
tbs
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Dear brain,

Is there anyway you could tell my stomach that it's full quicker? I would very much appreciate it and will even read up on some things so you can be better informed on methods that might not have occurred to you yet. Thanks.

The stretch marks on my body,
tbs
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Dear Sleep,

Could we set up an appointment for 1 am every day? I think that time slot would perfect. I love the times you come visit me already, but I think we could push that 3:45pm urge to sleep to about 1 instead. I just think that falling asleep in class would not be beneficial to any of us.

Tired individual,
tbs
 
Dear Francesa,

Go, get out of the car and go to him.

Still believing,

Me


Hey In There,

Knock it off would ya? Those testers are out to get you so you better straighten up. And learn to spell too!

Signed,

Out here
 
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Bandit58 said:
Dear beloved daughter,

It's your first day at uni, and your first time living away from home....you will be homesick and lost for the first few days, but you will make new friends and learn so much.....I wish I could hug you :(

Mum :heart:


I know you worry cause you are her Mum but she will be fine.
 
m.j.h said:
I know you worry cause you are her Mum but she will be fine.

Three days later she tells me there's a nice girl in the room next door she's made friends with, she's found a group she feels comfortable with ("the non drunk group";) ) and she's out shopping! :D
 
Dear Husband,

I do miss you. It's been nearly two months and I still cry myself to sleep sometimes and look forward to when we can talk but could I ask you a few favors while you're stationed in Korea?

Could you grow the fuck up a bit? I know you're closing on 40, and maybe you're trying to recapture your youth or something, but you have to leave a little money in our bank account if you want us to be able to eat until your next paycheck. Spending $500 in a 2 hour time frame is NOT being financially sound, especially when you know I have things that must be paid here over and above the bills. Please stop blowing $50 a night on your buddies at the club...my mom always told me that if I had to buy my friends, they weren't real friends. Maybe you should think on that.

You will be gone 5 months when you finally get a 2 week break to come home. Do we have to spend a weekend of that precious 2 weeks at your family's reunion? I have nothing against your family, but I also have nothing in common with them. Seriously, I'll probably just tell my job I can come in that weekend and let you and the kid go with your mom and stepdad. Due to the above and the amount you'll spend at the reunion, I know I'll need the money that'd get me.

When we IM back and forth during the times we aren't home/awake at the same time due to a 15 hour time zone difference, could you appear just a bit interested in what I have to say and answer my questions? Being "a guy" is not an excuse to blow me off and pick and choose what you want to answer. You promised we'd use this time to clear things up between us as it's a "safe" environment with time to word our answers so as to be as non-confrontational as possible. Falling back on the "I'm a guy" excuse for not wanting to talk makes me feel like you simply don't care. That excuse is why we're using IM, remember?

Be safe and be happy, but try to find just a bit of selflessness while there. You can be such a self-centered asshole sometimes while others you are the love of my life. I simply want to ensure the tables tilt towards the latter and not the former more often.

Frustrated and angry
Your Wife
 
Dear Heart:

I know that you are a mushy bleeding peice of meat. I know you are easy, if not cheap. I know that you need to beat and throb and love and be the center of the universe. I am doing my best for you lately, even more so having given up the smokes, and I am working on the fats and getting more exercise to make sure you are squeaky clean and in top condition so that you can do what you do best in comfort.

Do me a favor? Try and be satisfied with that you have? Window shopping is pointless and will only cause you grief in the end.

Sincerely,

Brain
 
Dear Cuntikins,

Please stop dripping your juices down my leg at work. Your owner does not appreciate having to sit in a puddle all day long. Not to mention, you are already on punishment for rubbing yourself on every surface you come into contact with. Have some class, you silly twat.

Thank you for being my second brain,

Meat Whistler
 
Seamus123 said:
Thanks.. i think. :confused: :eek:
I guess so. It's good to have a peak in men's minds sometimes and when they can vocalize their insecurities and such. It's cute...
 
Dear Munch Group,

Don't bother RSVPing if you're a 'maybe' that always means no. The restaurant we go to hates me because I say 8, and 4 show up. Stop making a liar out of me.


SS&C,
blue
 
Dear weather,

Thank you for the warmest January on record for my area. Much appreciated. Now if you could just keep up with the Groundhog's prediction of an early spring I would be very happy.

Thanks a bunch,

KR

P.S. If you could stop torturing the people in the northeastern United States and Florida that would be truly appreciated.
 
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